" It's me"
This is another poem. Is it about him you ask? Of course it is. I'm stuck how do you mend a heart that you broke yourself? How do you fix an ego you ripped apart? I ask myself these questions constantly these days. I can't blame him he doesn't know, he doesn't care. So why is my heart stuck? Why can't I put it back together? Maybe my pain from past situations has finally broken me. Perhaps this is true, I don't know. But there's on thing I do know. Something's stopping me, holding me back and it's not the world it's not him… it's me,
" Things he'll never know"
If you've read my other poems, you know about this guy and as I look from afar my heart sighs with all the things he'll never know. He'll never know how quickly I fell for him. He'll never know how one word from him brightens my day. He'll never know how I long to talk to him and show him my other side. Show him how I truly am…. Prove that I'm good enough. Prove to him how I feel. He'll never know how I feel. He'll never know I now cringe when I hear his voice, wishing it was me receiving his comments. He'll never know these things, no not at all. But there's one thing I wish he knew. I wish he knew he was losing me. Slowly but surely he was losing me. I was pulling back away taking a piece of my heart back with me each step I take away from him. Yes he's losing me, but that's not the sad thing, the sad thing is he doesn't care and worse he'll never know.
" His Voice"
I have to admit I'm very sensitive to voices, I can tell a lot from someone's voice. But when he says my name I don't know it's different. I immediately stand at attention What does he want? What does he need? How can I help? Yes I'm sprung to the highest level. It's not fun being sprung alone. He doesn't deserve me you know. I deserve better. Someone who will love me unconditionally. He can't do that I know. He's self-centered, he's cocky. He can't do anything for me. I can't count or trust him. But he can trust me, I'll be there I always will be. I'll give the best advice I can. I'll tell him he's special. I'll always be here waiting… waiting for him to throw a distress signal and I'll show up my heart waiting to be broken, my confidence to be crushed but when he says my name it's all worth it.
" Pain"
I don't believe that people always deserve pain. He doesn't. I hate to see him sad, it kills me you know. He doesn't deserve it. He may not be the best guy in the world but he's sweet to me, he talks to me when I text him, which is a lot more that other guys. I don't know if this is love or not. But if it is I'm alone. I hope his girl never hurts him or cheats she has the best guy in the world. It's amazing how I feel about him when he doesn't even care about me. I'm not pretty enough or dressed. But when we text it's like we forget what each other looks like and it's just words. Either way I'll be there to soften his pain anyway I can. Because that's what people in love do