Hmmm. Not really sure of myself...but I always feel that way...I'll just let you decide what you think of it. Now folks...the Smash Brother featured this time is not mentioned by name. Not once. You are going to have to figure out who it is by yourself...but here's a clue...the Smash Brother is not the narrator...but the Smash Brother is in disguse. Next sin...Sloth...very different from other sins...but just as dangerous...and one of the hardest to resist...
Sloth
I sat at the bar as usual. Same as always. Wouldn't have it any other way.
I know that my cash is gonna run low soon...and I wouldn't dare set another load onto the tab...The owner of this place would have my ear...
Some guy is sitting next to me...haven't heard a peep out of him...didn't even notice him...cant...seem to focus on him...I somewhat hope that it is because I am drunk...but...I cant seem to get that far today.
I stare at the brew...it's a sickly colour...I hope that this will get my senses blurred at least...take my mind off things...but I know deep down that it is in vain...
I taste the brew...it is bitter...it burns at my throat...and I am sickingly aware of it and everything else...
I soon notice that it has finally gone...my chance for today to hit dreamland has bypassed...I rest my head on the counter and wait for the barkeeper to kick me out for lingering...
"Why are you drinking alcohol...?"
I looked up...I instantly know that it is the guy next to me...I give him a stare...his features are not very vivid...maybe I have gotten hammered...but not nearly enough...
"Well...?"
"Because..." I mutter impatiently "This is a bar...Sherlock..."
"You know full well what I am trying to imply...I wish to know why you are consuming the alcohol and have arrived at this place to do so..."
I frown at him and ask "What are you? A psychiatrist?" not really expecting a serious answer...but apparently sarcasm is not known to this newcomer...
He seemed to lean back on his stool...somehow keeping perfect balance...clearly because he has not had anything to drink...feh...only a matter of time before he is kicked out for not spending his money...
I return to the glass...I press it to my lips in hope of gaining a few desperate drops of my anti-drug...
"I've never thought of myself that way."
"Humph?" I reply startled...he clearly gave my rhetorical question some thought.
"But I do have some understanding as to how the mind works..." he continued "Now...why do you come here to consume alcohol...?"
I don't really want to answer...I shrug and attempt to ignore him...all I have to do is wait for the barkeeper to come and--
"Well...?" he continued with irritating patience...
"Listen..." I murmur...trying my best to let my aggravation reach the surface in hopes of sounding crystal clear "If you're the big shot psychiatrist you think you are...then you should already know the answer..." I shake my head at him and--
"Correct."
What? I turn and stare at him...somewhat annoyed and confused... "I'm sorry?"
"I do indeed know why you consume that alcohol."
I groan...guys like this come along from time to time... "Then why...?" I ask him with a voice dripping of annoyance "Do you want me to answer you?"
But once again...he seems to have an answer prepared...
He presses his fingers together and gives me a piercing, analyzing gaze...I can't help but flinch.
"Because..." he tells me in a suspiciously calm tone "You need to know for yourself. You need to admit your reasons. You need to confront them."
Yeah...of course...'only you can prevent blah blah blah...' but somehow the words get to me. I find myself wondering the answer myself...
"You are aware of the risks? Alcohol can cause everlasting damage to your brain and liver...amongst other things..."
"Yeah..." I find myself replying absent mindedly...I feel somewhat disturbed by this figure...
"And you don't seem to care about that..." he noted "So why do you...?"
I struggle to come up with an answer... "Because...I like the taste?" I guess...not really sure of myself...
"No." he states with simplicity.
"Who are you to say that?" I snap "Who are you to say why I do what I do? I'm the one who should know such things!"
"Correct." he repeats "You should know. You do know. And you are lying."
"Okay then smart-ass..." I challenge "You tell me..."
"You are drinking...because you quite simply...wish to be drunk..."
I laugh a little...feeling a little reassured...guys like to play this sort of game from time to time...once satisfied...I can use that to my advantage...
"Why? Wanna help?"
"Fine."
"Okay then...first one to go under the table--"
"Won't be necessary." He declares.
"Sorry?"
"I won't be getting you a drink...I believe you've had enough..."
"But you just said--"
"You don't want a drink." He tells me sternly... "You want to get drunk."
I'm starting to feel a little insecure about this guy now...can't wait for the barkeeper to come along with the bill...and get rid of him...where the hell is he?
"Oh yes...?" I say distractedly...trying to buy time...
"Yes." He states with absolute confidence that he is correct. "And as I said...despite all better reason...I will help you..."
I feel like I'm going to sweat...
"And...alcohol or no alcohol...the alcohol is merely a catalyst...let's assume that I have another catalyst..."
He's starting to sound sinister now...he turns to me...I...I can see his eyes...purely fixed on me...I feel as if they are...the only things there...
"After all...the entire effect is entirely within your mind...created by your brain's nervous impulses and several chemical reactions...that is all what being drunk really is..."
If feel the need to get out of here...I get up and aim for the door...I slam into the wall...what the hell!! I slide to the floor and attempt to regain my posture...as I put my feet to the ground...I realize how heavy my body feels...walking is even harder...I...I can't seem to tell...where is the floor...? It's sloping? And my feet are miles away...sweat oozes from my pores...I try to wipe my forehead but feel a fever...I...I'm...
"You are drunk." The stranger said. With no emotion. No humor. Only cold serious truth.
And it was true...as much as I tried to object...I knew that I had tried to object...but I can't hear my words...they are distant...what I can make of them...they are slurring...ugh...I feel...UGH!!
--
"BLAAGGHH!!"
I vomit violently into the toilet.
"Ugh..." is all I can manage to say...I throat burns...I can taste the acidic waste still...it causes the nausea to repeat in a cycle...
I collapse against the cubicle door and try to clear my head...the collision against the door forever echoes through my skull...
"Ugh..." I repeat...rubbing my head...not really making it feel any better...not only did that guy somehow get me drunk (probably slipped something...no...the drink was empty when I saw him...) but he had somehow replicated the events of a hangover...one of the worst regular experiences of my life.
"What the hell are you...?" I ask to my long gone drinking buddy...
"Irrelevant." He responds. He has returned...I don't even need to check outside the cubicle...I'm not fortunate enough for him to leave just yet and I know it.
"No traffic cone...?" I ask weakly and sarcastically.
"No." Go figure...he responds. "How do you feel?"
"Lemme guess..." I say...trying to get a grip on were the voice is coming from. "You already know the answer..."
"Correct. Now…Please face that answer and present it to me and yourself..."
Bastard... "I feel sick, miserable, sick and want to hit something...just like every other binge and hangover I have..." I tell him bitterly.
"Then we have reached the next stage. Congratulations. The next question arises."
'Congratulations' he says 'you have smashed yourself out of your skull...fabulous prizes to be won...' "I'm all ears..." I mutter...I've given up trying to resist him.
"You drink because you wish to get drunk." he tells me the obvious. "But why do you wish to get drunk? When you are aware that it brings you no happiness...nor does it bring you anything other than an empty wallet, empty stomach and a lot of pain...I repeat...why do you willingly get drunk?"
"You know of course..." I predict.
"Correct." he replies with the usual catchphrase. "My current request is for you to divulge an account of my you trap yourself inside a world of suffering and confusion whenever you come to this bar."
"And...I have to face the answer...because..." he doesn't interrupt with a 'correct' this time... "I need to admit to myself...why I trap myself in another world where I am not happy..."
I actually think about it...then grin...I think I have found my way out.
"But that's the thing right? I don't. I don't have to face anything...I can just forget about you...continue with the life I always have..."
He did not say anything for a long while. Did I finally get rid of him?
No...Not yet...
"That is true..." he replies...he...he actually sounds disappointed."You can repeat the cycle. I can actually help you forget about me."
I sigh in relief...it's finally over...
"Don't be so hasty to decide..." he advises."What will you gain out of that...?"
"I can forget all about you..." I smirk.
"...I pity you..."
"Why?" I laugh. "You think I want to be upper class? That don't bring anybody happiness...that just fools them into thinking they have happiness...You obviously reckon that because my life has no glamour it isn't worth living..."
"No, yes and no...In that order..." he replies...no longer sounding threatening at all. "You are correct...having riches or fame does not bring anybody happiness..."
"I suppose you would know all about happiness wouldn't you? Big-shot psychiatrist?" I mock...yeah...showed him...he won't bother me again--
"Incorrect." The word takes me off guard...it's totally inconsistent with his previous displays of behavior.
"What?" I ask...I cannot contain my surprise...or my curiosity...is this guy for real?
"You were wrong. You are wrong." he states blankly. "I have no experience of happiness whatsoever. None. It is an alien concept. I know nothing as to what it feels like..."
I put the seat down and sit there for a long time. I put my hand on my chin and think this through. "Okay..." I ask him. "Why do you...who has had a really miserable life...supposedly...think you are capable of cleaning up my life to the extent were I will be happy?"
"...I have not experienced happiness. But you misunderstand me. I know what causes happiness. I know the triggers. I know the catalysts."
"You reckon the human brain is like a switchboard then...? Interesting concept pal...but I think there is more to it than that..."
"Actually...the human body is more like a machine than you would think...it has instructions and automatic reactions 'programmed' into it...it requires energy to function...even the emotions created by the brain is nothing more than...electricity...chemicals...all going through circuits depending on the situation it is designed for." He sighed. "The human body is not such a mystery after all...life is depressingly simple."
"Look..." I don't really like his way of thinking...but then again...am I really the one to talk? Am I just in one of those cycles? "...If happiness and anger and lust and whatever are all just preset...how are we different from robots? Or the computers that are our tools?"
"...Because a machine cannot feel emotion...they know what it is...they know what causes it...they know the triggers...but...can never experience it..."
"...You a robot?" I ask. It's not until a few seconds later I realized that I just asked a serious question.
"No. I can easily experience emotion..." he doesn't need to finish that sentence...but he does... "Hate. Angst. Anger. But not happiness...I once felt something I thought was happiness...but it turned out to be my anger...I was merely trying to drown the sorrow of what I was..."
"...Am I meant to feel sorry for you?" I ask calmly. I was forgetting that I was supposed to be pissed off at him.
"No. If anything you should feel scared or resentful towards me...but that is not relevant right now..."
"And what is...?"
"You are." Here we go... "You are unhappy...yet...I know you're catalysts...I can't find my own..."
...Something what he had said bugs me... "Do...do you hate me then...?"
"No. Why would I?" He replies. "If I were to hate you...I would not try to save you..."
"What do you feel towards me then?"
"...Disappointment." He tells me. "I'm disappointed that you...you have the sheer potential to be happy...yet you refuse to fulfill that potential..."
"...Yeah." I can't deny it. I avoided that for so long...but I can't hide anything from him...myself yes...but not him... "That a sin?" I joke. I don't find it funny.
"It actually is." he states. "Sloth. It is rather unique among the sins...most sins are known as actions that cause unhappiness to other people...yet sloth is the complete opposite. It is the decision to take no action...and cause unhappiness to yourself. It is the unwillingness to fulfill ones potential."
"...I'm a right old Slakoth aint I...?"
"...I want to ask you again...why you escape from this world and into agony."
"...Because..." I close my eyes...I face myself. "I hate the world I live in."
He pauses for a long time. He is letting my statement sink into my own psyche...those words...they echo over and over...its just those seven words from my mouth...and all of a sudden...the catalyst goes off...and I'm not so confused anymore. "You know the answer. Don't let me tell you what to think. You are no robot. Just answer this..."
"...Why do I hate the world?" I can tell what he is going to say now...its all clear...I grit my teeth and my hand rolls into a fist. "It's all because of Cipher..." I growl.
"And what did they do to you...?"
"Those bastards!!" I yell. I lash out and smash my fist into the side of the cubicle. I don't feel drunk anymore...it's all clear...clear as day...not even my anger can obscure it now... "They took everything!!"
"Do go on..." He encourages me...once upon a time...I would have hit him for saying that...but he has shown me what I should really hate!!
I smash my fists against the wall some more. "Murderers!!" I yell. "Murderers and demons!! They killed her!! All I came to Orre for was to study the relic stone of Agate village! All the way from Ilex Forest and for what!! I had to bring my daughter with me didn't I? Didn't I!!"
"Don't stop. You are almost--"
"Why the hell would I stop!! Do I think I'm going to forget what they did!! They just had to target Pyrite when we came to watch the Colosseum...she was eight..." I spit with disgust. "And they just had to do it with my own little pet didn't they!! That's the worst part!! Some loyalty that thing had!!"
"And how do you feel about that? Do you pity yourself?"
"Why!! What did I do wrong!! Oh I know!! I &#ing sat in the Under and boozed myself into an oblivious state for a few years!!" I kick the cubicle again. "How do I feel!! Nobody should feel the way I do!!" The door to the cubicle flies off...I stand there...surprised at my own fury...
"Looks like you freed yourself from your cage..." That's not a congratulations...it's an observation. "You want to help bring Cipher down?"
"Yes." I tell him bitterly and without hesitation. "Nobody should have to go for what I went through..."
"And why haven't you tried to stop them already?" I know the answer...it's me who knows the answer now...it's not hidden within me anymore.
"Because...I was a sloth..." I mutter...angry at myself. "I was afraid...I was confused...but the worst part was...I couldn't be asked...I couldn't put the effort forward...instead I just grieved and hated..."
He stands in front of me. He smiles. "Studying the Relic Stone hmmm? All the way from Ilex you say? Am I to understand you are a...researcher...?"
"Damn straight...But I didn't want to know where that stone came from though...I wanted to know how it worked..."
"Then allow me to grant you an opportunity...after the defeat of Evice a foundation of minds have come together to construct the means to undo the damage that Cipher caused...how would you like to relieve Cipher of their own weapons?"
"You mean..."
"With your knowledge of the Stone's purification capabilities...and the connections it may have...you are bound to help complete the purification chamber...you will be able to destroy the darkness within their slaves...the Shadow Pokémon..."
"...I'm not sure if I am up to it..." I admit. "I'm really not certain that my knowledge extends that far...nor am I certain that I can get my life back on track in time..."
His smile widens. "Don't come this far just to fall victim to your sin again...put some effort into it...will you forgive yourself if you don't try...?"
"I'm not sure if I will forgive myself if I fail..." But I realize now...If I want to defeat the darkness that Cipher caused...I need to defeat the darkness within myself... "Okay. But I'd rather try..."
"Good. The under is going to be filled in soon...the government will move its civilians to new homes and provide them with the means to start new lives...you should take that opportunity...consider it a new start to a new life..."
He turns to leave... "Wait!" I yell. "Why did you take the time to help me?"
He keeps his back to me...ponders on his answer. "It's like you said.'Nobody should have to go through the same as me.' You should experience happiness...it makes me sad to see that potential put to waste...you would also be wasting your life and soul...besides...it would serve Cipher right for trying to corrupt me..."
"What do you feel now...?" I need to know. "If it is not happiness...then what...?"
"...Satisfaction...and hope..."
"Yes...?" I ask...confused...
"Yes..." He responds...certain as ever... "...Don't feel too much resentment for your 'pet'...he was probably suffering more than anyone...to have the door to your heart closed...consumed with darkness...forced to do what you despise under the influence of hate...sound like someone you know...?"
"Yeah..." I respond...feeling guilty... "I wish I could help him..."
"I'm sure that it is not too late for him to be saved from the darkness..." he tells me...
"Why are you so certain?"
"Because...you were saved from darkness..." He has no trace of uncertainty in his voice. "Goodbye. You won't remember what I looked like...nor will I look the same to you if we were to meet again..."
"...Thank you..." I tell him. "...I hope one day...you are saved from darkness..."
"That's why I feel hope..." And with that...he was gone...
...Charming guy…I bet he has had his own little world of sorrows too…
--
"What do you want from life?" I ask the barkeeper.
He was clearly surprised at seeing me communicate with him. I usually just sat there… "I dunno…" he replied. "Support myself…I guess…gotta do with what you've got here in the under…"
"Hmmm…" I comment… "No goals…? Dreams…?"
He screwed his face up…as though he was trying to recognize me… "Ugh…" He hesitated for a moment. "I…I always wanted to…now that you mention it…"
"Have a dream in mind…?"
"Yeah…it's just that…"
"Pursue it." I get up and head for the exit…I open the door and lean against the frame for a moment. "I'll settle that tab tomorrow…"
He didn't seem to notice the last comment…he just merely nodded…Wonder where he will end up? Wonder where I will end up?
Who knows? Maybe I'll just fall as I reach the stars…but we all have hope…
That guy…didn't even ask for a name…but he gave me hope…even he had hope…
And you know what? I'm gonna do the same. I'll provide hope.
I walk out of the bar…and for the first time in months…I walk out of the under…
I shield my eyes…sunlight…I just came out of the darkness…
And I'm going to make an effort…and God help me…If Cipher stands in my way again…if they show their faces and throw puppies into lakes…or set babies on fire…or steal Father Christmas's magic hat…or do some other over the top evil thing…
Then they can go and &# themselves.