Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Chapter Two.

EPOV

We were moving out again; starting over. I begged my mom to let us stay in this fucking town this time, but she didn't listen. I hate being the way I am. Useless. Like a big baby. Being treated like I was gonna break at any fucking time. I know I'm ill. I know there's not much time left for me. So why the effort?

My mother, Elizabeth, and I have been moving around the country since I was diagnosed with a rare case of cancer. I didn't want to know much about it, but I feel like it's eating me from the inside. And it probably was. Mom is always finding a new town she thinks will "be good for my health". What health? Can't she see that I'm fucking dying? So I put on my best smile and pretend I'm going to try. Try to get better. Try to make new friends. What a big fucking joke. I don't have any friends. Never had. Who wants to be friends with a sick motherfucker anyway?

I liked Phoenix. I liked the sun, the heat. It was actually one of the few place I enjoyed living in. I've already lived in Montana, Ohio, Illinois - where I was born, California, North Carolina and now I was going to the state of Washington. Couldn't be more thrilled. I just wanted a place where I could fucking rest and wait peacefully for my death to come.

I looked out the window while my mom was driving her old Volvo. Everything in this little town, Forks, was so green and wet. And dark. Sunny days were rare. How could anyone live in a place like this? I guess I would find out. But I felt so fucking tired. Physically tired. Once upon a time I was actually healthy. I liked to play sports, run in my mom's yard…now I can't even walk down the street without feeling exhausted.

We finally got to the house that we called our new home; it wasn't too fancy but it wasn't a shed either. I couldn't even think about getting my luggage inside so mom had to do it all by herself. I wanted to kick myself. The house was already furnished, so I rushed upstairs - as fast as could, which was not very, and threw myself on the bed of the first room I could find. I had slept the entire day but still somehow felt like I had just ran in the Marathon.

I was spread out on my bed, wishing I'd never have to get up again. There was a soft knock on the door.

"Come on in mom," I said, the loudest I could. She entered my room with a sweet smile on her face. But that smile didn't reach her eyes. None of her smiles did since I got ill. I was making my own mother miserable.

She walked slowly towards my bed and sat on the edge of it. She started tenderly stroking my hair. I loved when she did that. It was so calming. For a moment I was able to forget about my shitty life.

"Are you feeling okay, sweetie?" she asked in a low voice.

"Sure," I murmured.

That answer was so much more practical. I didn't have to talk about the way my bones felt like sponges, or the way my heart struggled to beat inside my chest or the effort my lungs made to work. It gets harder everyday to have to go through all of this. It'd be so much easier if I just… died.

But I wouldn't do that to my mother. She didn't deserve that. My father passed away when I was only three years old and mom was totally devastated. He was the love of her life. But she still had me. So when I got sick, seven years ago, I knew it was too much for her. I couldn't even think about what it would be like for her when I died. Because I knew I would. Eventually.

"So, are you excited about the new school?"

"Couldn't be more thrilled…"

"Oh, come on sweetie. Just give it a try."

I opened my eyes and looked at her. I knew what she saw in my eyes. Exhaustion.

"I will, Mom. Don't worry. I'm gonna make new friends, my grades will be excellent as always, and I will live forever."

With the corner of my eyes I saw hers begin to water. I knew I was being too harsh with her. But I couldn't help it. I just can't see any reason to pretend it's all going to be just fine. I took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry Mother. Please don't cry."

She sniffed, but she wasn't exactly crying. If I could only find a way to take away my misery without transferring it all to her.

"I'm not crying, baby. I just don't like when you talk like that; like there's nothing you can do about it. Like you've already given up your life."

"I'm really sorry," I repeated in a whisper, not willing to argue over it any further.

"Are you hungry? Want me to bring you a sandwich, or a glass of milk?"

"Mom, I'm not a baby!"

She laughed heartlessly and stood up. "All right. If you need anything just call me, okay?"

"Okay, Mom"

And she left my room.

Tomorrow would be my first day of school at Forks High. I got tired just thinking about it. All the shit I would have to go through, all the questions people would ask me. I spent the rest of the afternoon like the useless person I am. Lying in my bed. How exciting.

At night I couldn't sleep well. It was raining like hell outside and the fucking noise kept me from falling asleep. It was a good thing I slept the whole previous day; otherwise I would be a bag of crap tomorrow. Or at least a bigger bag than I already am.

-x-

I woke up the next day and slowly got ready for school. I wasn't looking forward to it, at all. Mom had already made breakfast so I just sat at the table and slowly ate my pancakes.

"Hurry up darling, you don't want to be late on your first day, do you?"

"Of course not Mom, of course not." I said sarcastically, standing up and grabbing my schoolbag.

The drive to school was silent. I was so fucking nervous. It almost made me cry to think I was closer to all the shit I'd have to go through today.

Mom parked the car, turned off the ignition, and turned to me.

"Now, I want to wish you good luck baby. And call me if something goes wrong, okay?"

"Mom, please don't call me 'baby'. I already told you I don't like it. Nobody my age does."

"Well, you are still a baby to me," she said smiling, and then planted a kiss on my cheek.

I got out of the car as fast as I could, which was not very, and headed to the office. It was a lot warmer inside the building. When I got in the room, a redhead lady was standing behind her desk and her face lit up when she saw me. The new student.

I introduced myself and she handed me a map for the classes with a lot of numbers and a lot of other stuff that I didn't quite understand. Nice start. I roamed around the school without very much of an idea of what to do until a soft hand touched my back. I quickly turned around to face a blonde girl that was much shorter than me. She was kind of cute.

"Hello there," she said, "You're new here, aren't you? Are you lost? Do you need some help?"

I blinked. One question at a time would be awesome. She had this huge smile on her little face while waiting for my answer. And she was chewing gum. What a nasty habit.

"Uhh… yeah. I don't think I'll be able to find my classroom just by looking at this map. Would you help me out?"

"Of course! I'm Lauren. And you are..?" she said a little too enthusiastically as her smile widened.

"I'm Edward Masen."

She walked me to my class, always touching my arm, which was good because I had to make a little effort to stay up and not fall down on my ass. I also had to pause a few times to catch my breath and she looked pretty concerned, asking me if I was okay. Of course I was.

She waved me goodbye and went to her own class. I liked her, but she looks more like those shallow Barbie girls who don't care much about other people's feelings. Not my type at all.

As lucky as I am, the teacher announced me to the class when I entered the room. I blushed and went to the table in the back of the class with my head down. I just hated to be the center of attention and unfortunately I wouldn't escape from it today. So I sulked during the whole class. And the next one. And the next.

Finally it was lunch time. The Lauren girl managed to find me, don't ask me how, and asked me to join her table in the cafeteria. Well, it was better than eating by myself. Or sulk alone in the library.

She dragged me by my arm, I had yet to thank her for that, towards the table she and her friends were seated. They were mostly girls. All of them with huge white smiles, lots of make-up on, and chewing gum. I guess you could say they were pretty too. I wish I was in my room right now.

I let myself fall into the chair and tried not to pay attention to what they were saying. Apparently it had something to do with a trip to the mall next weekend for shopping. Adorable. I looked at my slice of pizza and my stomach stirred within me. No lunch for me today, then.

I sighed. My eyes wandered around the cafeteria, scanning everything they could. All the stupid faces in that room. The faces I'd have to see every single day for the rest of High School. Or until my mom decided to move away again. Or until I die.

And then I saw her for the first time. She was seated at the furthest table in the room, along with four other people. But I couldn't see them. Suddenly I couldn't see anyone else in that room, only her. It was like seeing an angel in the middle of hell.

Her complexion was white. Not pale; white. Like milk. Her hair was dark brown and long, falling in soft and beautiful waves down her back. She had a heart shaped face and her lips were deliciously full and pink. I had a strange urge to kiss them. I couldn't look away. She was the most stunning creature I had seen in my 17 years, and I just couldn't stop staring.

Suddenly, her black eyes shot in my direction, starring directly at me. And for some unknown reason, I still couldn't take my eyes off her. By the look on her face, she was upset about something. She wasn't gawking at me like I doing with her. So I quickly looked away, embarrassed.

"…isn't it, Edward?" the girl previously introduced as Jessica asked me.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Daydreaming, darling?" she said, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Um…yeah, I'm sorry. I kinda wasn't paying attention." I said with all my honesty. Because I couldn't care less about the shit they were saying.

As soon as the bell rang, Lauren volunteered again to walk me to my next class. And since I didn't want to get lost, I accepted. Her farewell this time consisted of winking at me and stroking my arm. Gross. I entered the room and noticed everybody else was already in their places and staring at me.

"Class, we have a new student who came from Arizona today. Welcome, Mr. Masen."

The teacher introduced me just like all the others did. I looked down and mumbled something like "thank you" and went to the only empty spot in the class. Next to that girl. I dragged myself again until I reached the table and collapsed into the chair next to her. I think she was watching me. I couldn't tell, because she was too close and looking at her wasn't an option.

I felt so fucking tired. I wished I was in my bed again. So I just put my head on my arms on the tabletop before me and closed my eyes. Biology was an easy subject for me. I didn't need to pay too much attention. I 'd feel a lot more comfortable studying that back at home.

So I let myself fall asleep.

The last thing I remember was someone gently shaking my shoulder. What the hell happened? Where am I? Asking that out lout would help a little…

"What… where am I?"

"Um… the class is already over. You fell asleep," a sweet soft voice said next to me.

I looked to the owner of the voice, and there she was in all of her gloriousness, looking at me with an uncertain expression. My eyes went wide when I processed her words in my mind. The class was over. I slept the whole period. I am late for my next class. Shit!

I hurried to gather my books, saying "Fuck, why does it always happen to me?" Seriously, it's not the first time I get in trouble for sleeping through the class. I just can't help it. It's stronger than me. My weakness is stronger than me.

I heard a chuckle next to me and looked back at her wondering what was funny about that. Was she laughing at me? Anyway, I was still late.

I stood up to leave the room. She probably wouldn't mind if I cared about not getting in trouble on my very first day of school.

I couldn't feel the bones of my legs, but I had to try.

I didn't make it.

The floor was coming in my direction. Or maybe it was the other way around?

I felt a little, but strong arm snake around my waist as I fell, straightening me up.

"Hey there, buddy! Are you okay?" she seemed pretty concerned. And she probably was wondering what the fuck was wrong with me now. Awesome.

"It's nothing, really. I'm fine," I said, sounding pretty lame.

I tried to walk away from her, but I still hadn't found my strength. Her grip around me tightened. She was really strong for a girl. Or maybe I was too weak. Yeah, that was probably it.

"Do you want me to help you get to your next class?" she asked.

"Um… yes, thank you" I wasn't in place to decline any help right now. And I also didn't want to get away from her so soon, but I just hated that I was so fucking weak. She was a tiny little goddess, and I was a dying bug.

She walked to my next class, and it had already started. Of course.

And I slept through it again. Who cares? I'm dying anyway. Fuck, I was dying. At least I had seen an angel before I actually passed away.

At the end of class, my mom picked me up and drove us home.

I threw myself on the bed without even taking my shoes off. I just wanted to sleep. Even more. I couldn't stand up straight anymore. It was hard for me to breath again.

My life sucked.

A/N: I'd like to thank Emily (XEdwardLiLCullenX) for beta'ing the story for me *v*