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"What the bloody h*** is your problem?" Spike demanded as the Slayer shoved him through her front door.
"You vandalized downtown and smashed people's cars. Really?" Buffy glared at him, "Eating kittens and staking your old buddies isn't exciting enough for you?"
"Kittens?" Willow looked upset, "You eat kittens?"
The whole Scooby gang stood in the living room, eyeing the vampire with curious, confused, or annoyed expressions.
Spike rolled his eyes, "Oh, like you've never broken a few car windows."
"You ripped the doors off and chased the owners for amusement." Giles cleaned his glasses.
"I'm evil. Get over it. Can't hurt them anyway." he started to walk away, "Case closed. See you another time. Passions is on."
"We heard you had passions with Dead Boy." Xander joked, "What? Being lonely and still liking women ain't workin' for ya?"
The blond vampire stopped in his tracks, turned, and glared, "What did you just say?"
"You heard me." Xander stepped closer, "You and Angel, a lot more than friendly."
Spike lunged towards him, then grabbed his head in pain, "Ah! G**! It isn't like that!"
"But, I saw you." Dawn moved in next to Willow, "You were in bed together, snuggling."
The vampire regained his composure and straightened, "We're not bloody shagging."
"Right, of course not." Anya said dryly, "There must be some other explanation for two male vampires lying in bed together."
Buffy noticed the almost healed punctures sticking out from under the collar of his t-shirt under his signature duster, "Oh my g**! He bit you. He drank your blood didn't he? Oh my g**!"
"W-why would he do that? Is he evil again?" the redheaded witch started worrying, on the verge of pacing.
"Woah, hold on a minute…" Spike tried to explain.
Giles continued rubbing his lenses with a handkerchief, though they were clearly smudge free.
Xander laughed, "Isn't that like a "You're mine. I own you" between vampires? This is priceless."
"It doesn't work the way that you're thinking." Angel's voice came from the doorway.
They turned towards the still-open door.
"Are you following me?" the british vampire was getting annoyed, "Leave me alone, you bloody ponce."
"Shut up, Spike." Angel looked at Buffy, "I'm still welcome?"
Buffy sighed, "Yes, come in."
Spike glared but seethed quietly as the brunette vampire walked in. The others glanced at him with puzzled expressions. No one could get Spike to shut up.
The Slayer looked at Angel, "Okay, what the h*** is going on here?"
"She means why were you and Spike in bed together?" the ex-demon stated.
"Reclaiming." Angel responded in one word.
A deep growl came from the blond vampire's throat. He clearly didn't like this.
"Re-whating?" the Chosen One asked.
"I've heard of it." Giles went to a bookshelf, pulled down a book, and flipped through the pages, "It's in here somewhere."
"Reclaiming. So, you're saying you own him?" Xander smirked, "So, the Dawnster saw what she saw."
"I'm not his b****, you bloody idiot!" Spike's vamp face came out, "Shut your mouth or I'll…"
"You'll what?" he interrupted, "Hurt my feelings? You can't touch me, Bleach Boy."
Anya added, "Not without a painful migraine that is."
"Xander, leave him alone." Willow mediated, "If he says it didn't happen, it didn't. Spike, uh, what did happen with you and Angel and the snuggling?"
"We were not snuggling, you redheaded bint!" the blond was using all his self-control to avoid the excruciating headache that would come from ripping someone's throat out.
"Spike, calm down and shut up." Angel grabbed his throat and arm with the kind of force that would break a human.
Everyone stared, unsure what to do, as the british vampire stood and breathed heavily, clenching his fists like he was going to beat something to death. The older, irish vampire didn't let go of him until the yellow eyes and ridges of his vamp face disappeared.
Spike glared, "I hate you, the bloody lot of you."
"We're not very fond of you either." Xander frowned, "You wanna go away now?"
"You'd like that wouldn't you, Wonder Boy?" the blond mocked, "Make you look manlier in front of the ladies if I'm gone?"
"Oh, stop with the bravado." Buffy cut in, "We all know you're a pmsing boogie man that can't bite. I've had barbies manlier than you."
"At least I've got the stones to beat down demons. This poof has to hide behind you, luv." Spike smirked, "You thought I was man enough when we shagged a house down."
"Oh my g**! Ew!" Dawn exclaimed, "I'm seriously gonna puke!"
"You did what now!?" Xander choked on the soda he'd been drinking and stared at Buffy.
"She had sex with him," Anya explained to her boyfriend, as usual not realizing he understood perfectly, "and they knocked down a home in the process."
"You're a pig!" the Slayer punched the british vampire in the face, causing him to fly across the room into the couch.
Spike grabbed his nose that was now gushing blood, "Bloody h***! You broke my nose!"
"I'd say it was well deserved." Giles cleared his throat and put on his glasses, "Can we get back on subject? Now, this reclaiming-it has something to do with vampire lineage, correct?"
"Yes." Angel answered, "It's a way to strengthen and renew the bond between sire and childe."
"But, I thought Drusilla was his sire." Willow glanced at the younger vampire who was sitting on the couch and glaring at everyone in the room.
"Drusilla was unfit to carry out the responsibility, so I did. I didn't make Spike, but I am his sire in every other sense." Angel explained.
The blond scoffed, "A bloody awful job you've done there, mate."
"Get blood on my couch and I'll throw you outside when the sun comes up." Buffy threatened.
"Oh, I'm real scared, pet." he responded sarcastically.
Xander spoke like Spike wasn't there, "Why would you ever want to renew any kind of bond with that guy? A pointy stake to the heart would be a lot easier and so much more entertaining."
Buffy rolled her eyes, "Okay, so what's this reclaiming thing entail?"
"And why were you guys all cuddly in your bed?" Dawn questioned.
Angel shifted uncomfortably, "I, uh, drank his blood and he drank mine."
"Not willingly!" Spike argued, "The poof chained me to his bed like some kind of kinky pervert."
"So, that's why you bit him. But, you don't have any bites, unless…" Willow's thought trailed off.
"No." the brunette vampire showed them the cut on his hand that was nearly gone, "I didn't let him bite me."
His childe growled, "Oh, so it's so terrible for me to bite you, but biting me-against my will, I might add-is bloody well fine. You, Angelus, are a poof, a pervert, and a hypocrite."
"Do we really have to argue about this?" Angel got annoyed, "That's all it is with you: arguing, competing about everything, and being absolutely infuriating with that stupid smirk on your face. I swear, you do everything just to spite me."
"Oh, look who's talking, peaches." Spike scowled, "Everywhere I go, you're in my way. Just can't stand letting me be happy while you live in eternal torment. The broody-puppy-with-a-mysterious-past routine is really old."
"Enough." Buffy interrupted, "So, what's with the getting close and personal? You hate each other."
"Yeah, immortal enemies don't do the cuddling." Xander joked, "Or are you more frenemies, holding hands while you try to kill each other?"
"Well, I made you a vampire in an alternate reality and we have sex now, so it makes sense. You're my sweet kooky face." Anya moved closer to her boyfriend and grabbed his hand.
"Hey, I don't even like this nancy boy." the blond vampire argued, "I'd stake him right now."
"You can't and you know it, Spike." Angel seemed very sure of this.
"Why can't he?" Dawn asked, "I mean, not that he should, but why?"
"I'm stronger than him," Angel told them, "and he needs me."
"The bloody h*** I do!" Spike yelled, "Big Bads don't need anyone, especially the likes of you."
"Really?" the elder vamp mocked, "Sucking down my blood like a babe with a bottle says otherwise. It's the best thing you've had since Drusilla. Admit it."
"Oh, you just love making my unlife Hell, don't you?" the blond hissed, "Always have. I'm just another thing for you to toy with until I'm as barmy as Dru. You, Angelus, drive me absolutely insane. Should've killed you long ago."
"We both know what it would do to you." Angel reminded him.
"Okay, somebody explain this right now." Buffy groaned and interrupted again, "What's going on and what's it have to do with you two?"
She felt like no one was listening to a word she said.
Her ex with an evil duel personality slowly moved closer to the couch and spoke up, "The bond between vampire families is a very strong thing, between sire and childe especially. Regardless of their feelings toward each other, instinct and shared blood draws them together."
The group saw him put a hand on Spike's shoulder and the younger lean towards him for a second before both jerked away and looked disgusted. Willow had to cover Xander's mouth to stop him from saying anything.
"Right." Giles pushed up his glasses and read from the book, "It says reclaiming is compared to first turning, drinking each other's blood and establishing a sire/childe bond."
"And why would you want to reestablish that?" Xander asked, "You hate each other."
"As annoying as he is, he's my responsibility." Angel revealed, "I made him the way he is."
"What, a neutered monster that obsesses over Buffy?" Xander joked.
"A merciless killer that craves violence for the thrill." he answered dryly, "He was a poet pining for a woman above him until Drusilla and I got ahold of him."
"So like now minus the fancy words and with sharp teeth he can't use." Xander commented.
"Oh, shut up." Spike countered, "You pined after Miss Slutty the Vampire Slayer here for years. Can't deny that. At least I've got the stones to admit it."
"Okay, anyway, sire/childe bond...:" Willow stopped further insults, "What does that mean?"
Giles read from the book, "An emotional and instinctual connection that when first formed or renewed cannot be fought against. Most vampires keep the bond strong by regularly consuming each other's blood."
Angel further explained, "The connection is always there, but the blood makes it a lot stronger. Because we recently drank each other's blood, our senses are more aware of each other and Spike, as much as he'd like to deny it, has an instinctual and emotional need to be near me."
"So, you made him want you." Anya stated.
"It's not bloody sexual!" Spike yelled.
The older vampire cut of the blond's cursing, "It's more like a mentor/protege relationship, or like Buffy and Joyce."
"I ain't a schoolgirl that pals with losers and librarians." the brit argued.
"Really?" Xander gestured around the room, "Librarian. So-called losers." he gestured at Spike, "Impotent."
"That means you can't bite or satisfy a woman." Anya explained.
"I know what it means." Spike spoke through clenched teeth, "Listen here, Wonder Boy. I may not be able to kill right now, but I will get this thing out of my head, and when I do, I'll kill you and suck the ladies dry."
"Oh, give it a rest, Spike." Buffy rolled her eyes and looked to Angel, "So, what, he's a baby that needs his daddy?"
"If you want to insult both of us, yes." the older vampire answered, "I can sense his emotions and mine tell me to take care of him as if he were a fledgling again. It's very annoying."
"Now, that is hilarious." Xander started again.
Said "baby" growled in a way that would have terrified anyone that didn't now about his "no murdering people" head chip, "Shut it, sidekick."
He could tell the Sun was coming up and debated making a run for his crypt when he realized Angel would be here. Something in his cold, dead chest told him to stay at the Slayer's. Spike growled inwardly and told himself it was because of Buffy. Guess one day wouldn't hurt. Screw sire/childe bond and the bloody poof.
He settled back into the couch and waited for night.
