For Love or Vice
The Profligacy of ninja life
By the Brass Dragon
Chapter 2; Diligence in attestation
Kakashi tapped the spine of a brightly colored book against his thigh. Obviously word of 'ninja vice' had spread. Eyes that had seemed to scoff were now understanding; even pitying. Pacing before a ragged corpse of trees he shoved the offending book into his weapon's pouch. People he'd never spoken to were greeting him; village women weren't averting their eyes as he read in plain public view.
Iruka had flipped his social standing with a simple lecture to two curious genin. The man had great potential. Sighing he rolled a shoulder and tilted his head back to ease a stiff neck; only to pause mid-motion as he caught sight of Sakura creeping tentatively into the clearing. "Sakura?" He asked confused. "Did you forget something?" She'd seemed distracted throughout this morning's training, and had disappeared quickly when he'd dismissed them twenty minutes ago.
"No. Kakashi-sensei…" Her chin quivered and she bit her lip, clearly distressed. "There's something… I need to talk to you about something."
Iruka looked tired. His hair was loosened, a sagging pony tail flanked by long loose strands. His leaf hiatiate was hanging around his neck, pulled down as his last class had scrambled out the door with screeching giggles and pounding feet.
With a blissful sigh he reclined in his chair and grinned at the boy in front of his desk. "I am so joining your fan club the first chance I get."
Sasuke grinned, shaking his head as he stepped forward and put the large Styrofoam cup of coffee before his former teacher, the paper bag at his side rustling as he set a sandwich and wrapped wedge of very chocolate cake. "I heard a rumor that you started the first years on weapons training today." He informed, filching a still hot crisp from the sandwich's side.
Iruka rubbed his nose. "Is that the reason for all this?" He asked eyeing the spread in disbelief.
Crossing his arms Sasuke leaned against the desk. "No. It's for the tea."
A sweet smile changed Iruka's weary face completely. "Ah, Sasuke, you didn't need to do this. I'll always do what I can for you; I don't expect anything in return."
Fighting very hard not to squirm, a small blush slipped past his defenses. "I know it's expensive." He blurted. "And you used to make it for me in school and…" He faltered looking embarrassed. Fiddling he straightened a fork and napkin. "I never really ever…you know…"
"I know."
Seeming to loose some of his tension, he nodded. When Iruka unearthed another fork and began unwrapping the cake, his lips twitched and he rested his elbows lightly beside newly graded quizzes.
Kakashi marched into the academy pushing a very distraught Sakura before him, both hands firmly placed on her shoulders. He swiftly maneuvered her around a corner.
"Kakashi?"
Soft rubber soled sandals squeaked to a halt, and he turned sharply and pinned a curious Kurenai with a desperate glare. Sakura's head snapped back from the force and bounced off her sensei's chest.
Jostling some papers in her arms the woman looked back and forth from student to teacher, her brow furrowed. "Sakura-chan? Is something wrong? You look upset."
He could feel it under his hands; the fine trembling that seemed to radiate from the girl's spine, and then, one wet sniffle.
"Oh. Oh my! Sakura…" Kurenai gushed.
Kakashi frantically looked from the woman worriedly biting her lip to the girl, whose eyes were becoming glossy.
"Sweetie…" Kurenai cooed, reaching out.
Kakashi smacked her hand away. "Shut up!" He hissed pleadingly, trying to convey with one wide eye that 'this girl had been simpering and rambling hysterically for the past thirty minutes, and he'd just gotten her to STOP', before shoving Sakura forward and almost giving into the urge to scream Iruka's name in desperation.
Sasuke was licking the tines of his fork, eyes half lidded from chocolate induced euphoria when the door was flung open. He was stuck, mouth slightly open, tongue out, and sitting on Iruka's desk while the teacher slowly ate his sandwich.
"Kakashi-sensei?" Iruka asked, setting down his meal and wiping his hands and mouth on a napkin.
Sasuke took one look at his sensei's tense hunched stance and Sakura's trembling lower lip and slid off the desk. "I should be going."
Kakashi nodded thankfully and pushed Sakura into the room.
"Sasuke-kun." Iruka called, opening his desk drawer and pulling out a small cloth wrapped bundle. He tossed it gently into the boy's open hands. "To help you sleep." He said quietly. Sasuke's eyes widened fractionally, and then he nodded and shut the door carefully behind him.
Kakashi nudged Sakura all the way across the room, and eventually made it to Iruka's desk. In turn the man came around and stopped by their side. Not much can slip past a school teacher, and after a few seconds he did something Kakashi didn't expect; he put his hands under Sakura's arms and lifted her to sit on his desk. "Now, what seems to be that matter?"
Sakura blinked rapidly, the urge to let tears spill down her cheeks nearly overwhelming. Breathing in quick short bursts she fought between being the young lady she should be and the little girl she felt like.
"Shh. Shh." He calmed, handing her a napkin. "Blow your nose and tell me what's wrong."
"I can't fix it if I know what's broken." Sensei said with a kind smile, moving her bangs carefully out of her eyes and behind her ear. "Where the other kids teasing you again Sakura-chan?"
She balled up the dirty napkin and composed herself the best she could. "I don't want to be a ninja." She blurted, biting her lip as Iruka looked at Kakashi and then back.
"Oh?" He handed her another napkin. "Can I ask what changed your mind?"
Sakura squared her shoulders, sniffling once more. "You did Iruka-sensei."
"Oh? How did I do that?" He held up the trash bin and let her toss the soiled napkins in.
"When you told Naruto and I about vices the other night, you made me realize something. Ninja live fast, lonely lives. The last thing I want for myself is an unending sea of missions and the only traces of romance to come from the pages of a book." She cast a quick guilty glance, with an underlay of pure unadulterated pity, at Kakashi. "All jounins seem to be socially stunted and hardly able to interact with anyone below their rank. Marriage seems to be rare, and family even rarer. It's not something I can image for myself; that kind of life." Her rant seemed to trail off dejectedly, and she looked down at her swinging feet sadly.
Iruka was quiet, and Kakashi almost gave into the urge to poke, when he finally spoke. "I'm disappointed in you, I thought you were smarter that that Sakura." Her head swung up and wide shocked eyes fixed on her teacher.
Kakashi blinked and inhaled sharply, 'what the hell…".
"What?" Sakura whispered.
Holding up a hand he lifted a finger. "If ninja live fast and lonely lives, how do you explain Sandaime or Godaime? Or even Jiraiya and Orochimaru? They've lived more than half a century, or more. That's a full life for even a civilian." Lifting a second finger he tilted his head. "If all jounin are social stunted and can't interact with those below their rank, would they take on genin teams? I'm a chunin, how do you explain my relations with Kakashi-sensei or Genma? Don't Kotetsu, Izumo and I interact with various jounin everyday?"
Sakura blinked, opening her mouth to speak, but only nodding. "As for love, romance, family and such;" he held up a third finger "how do you explain Shikamaru, Ino, Choiji, Shino, Hinata, Kiba, Sasuke…a very large portion of your graduating class?" He demanded in a quiet voice. "They all come from established or even legendary shinobi families. Most of their parents married for the soul reason that they loved each other." Sighing he stepped back and let his hand fall.
"You've focused too much on Kakashi-sensei and his books. You're seeing him as the typical Konohana ninja. He is not typical, and you don't have the means to even consider measuring yourself against him or his skills. Practically no one in Kohona or anywhere else has those means." He smiled, trying to take away the sting of any unintended insult. "You don't have to go any further than you are right now, you could stay a genin for the rest of your life. But I think before you make that choice, you should think about it a little more and maybe open your eyes and take a closer look at the world around you." Stepping up he rested a hand on her shoulder and watched her try to sort through what he had just said.
"It's a lot to think about." Kakashi said softly, catching their attention. "Take your time and be sure the choice you make is right for you."
She nodded, sliding very slowly off the desk. "Yes. Thank you and I'm sorry, if I caused you any trouble." Her apology was broad, and aimed at both men.
Kakashi snorted, and Iruka gave her shoulder another reassuring squeeze. "It's your future. You're supposed to worry about it." She offered them a crooked smile and slowly left the room.
After the door had shut, Iruka groaned and sank to the floor, crumpling and then unfolding; letting his head 'thunk' on the worn wood.
"Are you alright?" Kakashi asked, taking a seat by his hip and peering down at him.
"This is too much." He moaned "'Take a job at the academy' they told me, 'less stress, no surprises' they said. Bullshit." Iruka rambled. "Liars, all of 'em."
"You're bleeding." Kakashi informed, poking lightly at the soiled bandages through a torn shirt sleeve.
"Give the little goblins sharp and pointies, and then try to teach them to make them into projectiles. Little monsters will throw them at each other like it's dodge ball."
"You've lost your hair tie." He picked it up, twirling it in front of his masked face.
Iruka sighed, closing his eyes. "That and any trace of my sanity."
"I wouldn't say that." Kakashi rumbled, amused, tapping Iruka's bare forehead. "You got through to Sakura…" He rubbed his covered mouth in contemplation.
"Did it insult you?" He asked rolling his head to meet Kakashi's eye.
"You seem to care a great deal about what people think of me." His voice was quiet, and questioning. "Why would you care if I were offended or not?"
Blinking up at the copy-nin, he wondered when the conversation had turned to more serious matters. "She wouldn't have meant to offend you. I'm sure you could do without any more of speculation about you and your books."
Kakashi felt his lips curve. "At least you try to find some sort of reason behind it. Anyone else would have just agreed that I was a pervert and been done with it."
"Eh." Iruka scoffed, reaching up to rub his nose. "I don't know how anyone can call you a pervert with Jiraiya and Ebisu around."
"Ah." Kakashi nodded, and then paused. "Ebisu? You're the second person to call him a pervert. What don't I know?"
Iruka flushed and turned his head. "I'd rather not talk about that right now."
He eyed that bright pink blush and imagined ten kinds of embarrassing, compromising situations; placing Iruka in various rolls. And was confused when the images made him uncomfortable and vaguely angry rather than amused. "Right." He stood, unnecessarily brushing himself off before offering a hand to help the other up. "I'll help you clean up and get home." He suggested, pulling Iruka to his feet.
"Thank you." He sighed tilting his head tiredly.
"Mm." Kakashi hummed, unsure of what to do with such gratitude.
Iruka was confused. He seemed to be caught at an in-between with this strange relationship with Kakashi. 'Friends' seemed to be to intimate a term, but 'acquaintance' was something they'd passed by already. Groaning softly he slumped over the railing of the small balcony. The twisted wrought iron clung to the side of the Hokage's private library.
Not to long before the chunin exams, he'd offhandedly suggested to the sandaime that the entire thing needed reorganizing. So…in addition to the preparations of the exams, his evenings were spent with Saratobi-sensei, elbow deep in dusty decaying scrolls.
When the dust had settled, and the rebuilding had begun and Tsunade-sama had taken her place in the office, he had explained the predicament and pointed out the problems.
She in turn had regarded him curiously, and then raised one elegant brow. "Well, you should get busy then."
Iruka had shown amazing restraint, merely biting the inside of his cheek and mentally re-arranging his schedule. To be fair, the woman had given her consent to all of his suggestions, sometimes showing up to watch him speculatively and poke around the more obscure looking documents.
So when a body slumped heavily against his shoulder and moaned 'slacker', he grinned cheekily.
Izumo had volunteered to help out once, and the Hokage had appointed him Iruka's 'assistant'. "We're never going to be done," was bemoaned against Iruka's shoulder "we'll die here. Forever preserved under eons worth of dust and paper."
Chuckling he bumped the man aside gently. "Eh. We'll get done, if Tsunade-sama will let me bust out that wall and use the room next door."
Izumo gazed at him wide eyed. "You're just drunk with power now aren't you?" He sighed dreamily, "Will you ask her if I can have a pony?"
Iruka nodded sagely. "Mm. Of course. Strong, fluffy, and white…with black spots."
Izumo giggled very convincingly and tugged him inside to look at the doomed wall.
Genma tapped one finger on the tabletop, staring at a flustered looking Kotetsu. "And you can't take my report because…" He drawled.
Sifting uncomfortably behind the desk, he looked pleadingly towards the door. "I don't have that kind of clearance." He protested waving his hands rather frantically. "I just file, and receive general mission requests."
There was a plaintive sigh and a general rumbling of discontent. "And who is supposed to be her that does have that clearance?" Ibiki demanded.
"Ah…um… That would be Iruka."
Ibiki stilled, and seemed to flounder for a response. "Oh."
"Sensei's late?" Kiba's voice chimed in from somewhere in the room.
Kakashi looked up from his copy of 'Nin-Weekly' and glanced at the clock, shrugging a shoulder he flipped a page.
"What are you reading?" Shikamaru demanded in a disapproving tone, eyeing the magazine.
"Shut. Up."
The door slowly slid open, a dirty gray tinged foot shoved it the rest of the way, and Iruka walked slowly to the desk. "Yes?" He asked, turning to face the packed room as he carefully set down a case of scrolls.
"Were you…baking?" Genma asked in an amazed tone.
Iruka blew back a strand of dirty, gray tinged, plaster drenched hair and glared. "Does this honestly look like flour to you?" He asked quietly.
Shizune's head peeked through the open door apprehensively. "Iruka-ku…sensei. Your wounds…"
"Are definitely not going to open any time soon." He countered pulling off his headband and rubbing his forehead.
"Yes, of course." She nodded. "But you should get them cleaned up; we have no idea what they used for that plaster."
Sighing heavily he sat and took Genma's report. "Of course Shizune-san, first chance I get." Kotetsu shifted away, and Genma took a step back, neither wanting to be in the line of fire.
"Um." Shizune hid a bit better behind the door. "Tsunade-sama would like to know, um, when her library will be finished." She abruptly disappeared, pulling the door nearly closed in front of her.
The room was eerily still as Iruka took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Of course Shizune-san, first chance I get."
Peeking back into the room she nodded, bowing and backing slowly out of sight. Stamping approval on Genma's report he calmly made not and handed a folder and scroll over to Kotetsu, before just as calmly hurling his pen at a slowly retreating Gemna.
"Ow! Damnit! Why me?" He demanded, sounding upset.
Iruka just smiled sweetly, calling out "Next."
Ibiki cautiously picked the pen up from the floor and warily made his way forward, not at all liking the glare Iruka was giving the tall stack of papers that made up his report.
The end of his shift found Iruka face down on the mission desk. He was dirty, sore, and very tired. Wrapping an arm around himself he hissed harshly. There were still twenty thousand things he needed to do, and the presence at the door couldn't seem to decide if it actually wanted to enter or not.
Kakashi fiddled at the slightly open door, unsure of how to instigate a potential confrontation. It had been openly discussed just how volatile the man had been today, and he was wary that maybe he had misinterpreted just how friendly the relationship between the two of them had become. Taking a deep steadying breath he stepped in, shutting the door behind him.
"Was there something you needed Kakashi-sensei?" He asked trying not to sound put-upon.
"No."
Iruka sighed and seemed to slump further into the table. "You're not going to throw things at me?" Kakashi asked sounding faintly amused.
Pushing himself up to rest on his elbows, he pinned the copy-nin with a tired glare and frowned. "Are you going to add to my never ending list of things to do?"
Shaking his head in response, Iruka hummed and nodded approvingly. "Do you have a message from the Hokage, Izumo, Shizune…or anyone else for that matter?"
"Nope. No messages." He assured patting his pockets in affirmation.
A sweet, almost goofy smile spread across Iruka's face. "Are you Genma? Under a henge?"
Kakashi started, one blue eye widening in surprise. "No, not the last time I checked."
Iruka nodded, stretching out his arms and muttering a half hearted 'kai' before letting his head rest on the table again. "Okay. Common in…pull up a chair."
Kakashi grinned, shaking his head and made his way to the desk for his coup de gras; a large Styrofoam coffee cup, that he set on the table before the tired sensei's nose.
Iruka relaxed and graced Kakashi with an honest-to-goodness grateful smile. "You are a god of a man, I promise to build a shrine and start a Church of Hakate as soon as I find some time to print up the flyers."
The masked face twisted with good natured mirth. "You do that. I can't take all the credit though. I ran into Sasuke outside, he picked it up for you."
Grinning as he pushed himself back up into a sitting position, still dirty hands carefully pried the plastic lid off the cup. "Such a sweet, well mannered, gem of a boy." He sighed, "I'm all for shoving him up on that golden pedestal. Yes, those countless starry eyed school girls and dirty old men were right all along."
Kakashi sputtered and then erupted into rough laughter. "You do understand that you fall more into the later category, right?" He laughed all the more when Iruka's only response was to sigh mournfully and nod. Leaning back in his chair he grinned and regarded the man before him. "So. What happened?"
Flushing faintly, Iruka brought the cup to his lips. "A ceiling fell on me."
At Kakashi's incredulous gaze he proceeded to tell the tale of Izumo, a justu, and the woe begotten wall that had, indeed, been load bearing.
And so ends our tale. There is a bit about how the ceiling fell, and Iruka's resulting temper tantrum; but it doesn't really flow so that may just be a little drabble for later.
You wouldn't believe the pieces of stories I have buried in notebooks, hidden within class notes and seminar doodles. I have the feeling that this story was an offshoot for more; I found an Iruka and Tsunade conversation in a biology folder…and a Iruka flashback about a chunin exam in Wave. They all have chunks of something familiar, the torn up library, things thrown, and this strange all knowing Iruka. Seriously, how does no one in this village know each other? In the manga no one has met anyone else, no one seems to know about anyone else…