Disclaimer: This 16-year old boy does not own Naruto or any other brand name. He does on the OC though and the techniques that follow and the basic idea of this story. But not Naruto.

My Sentences

"Ow…ow, ow, ow… OW! WHAT THE HELL IS WITH ALL THESE BRANCHES?" Naruto yelled while repeatedly getting slapped in the face by various branches of various shapes and sizes. 'Why couldn't they all be palm trees?' Naruto thought rubbing his face, "Where did that bastard get off to?" Slowing down he decided to stop and take a breather. Coming to a complete stop he tried to catch his breath, only to find himself falling, "WHAAAA" he yelled while plummeting through the air. After about 2 to 3 minutes of falling he crossed his arms and pouted, "Ok you have GOT to be kidding me, what the fu-" He landed face first on something soft. He decided to squeeze it to test what it was until he heard a deep moan and noticed it was slimy. His face immediately darkened and anime tears began to fall as he found himself slowly backing away from a giant horned toad, which seemed to be sleeping. He immediately dashed away through a deep tunnel without looking back. "What the HELL is wrong with this isl-", he yelled before slamming into something hard "Oooow. What was tha-"

"Ah, Naruto-kun, glad you could make it, I see you took your sweet time getting here. Well never mind that, we're here." The man said while clipping a clip-on tie on to his wife beater.

Naruto's jaw dropped to the ground as his eyes popped out. About 100 feet down from the cliff they were standing on, was a huge village bustling with a multitude of people. However, there were a few things wrong with the town. The first was a giant monitor, which looked like it was built into a clear building, the monitor taking up half of the building, that almost came up to the cliff itself, though it was about 2 miles away. The next thing that caught his immediate attention was a giant archway in the middle of everything. It gave off a weird feeling too, though it was a different feeling from the man's tattoos, he felt as if he was being pulled into it. Naruto deadpanned, "Ok old man I think its time you answered some que-"

"I'm only 18." The teen said scratch scratching the back of his head almost in the same way as Naruto, however, his face was vaguely unreadable.

"What? I don't remember asking for yo-" The newly found teen cut in, " You called me old, last time I checked I'm only 2 years older than you kid. Anyway, here we are. The First Stop." The man said almost eager. "…You might want to clean up a bit," he said stifling a laugh. Naruto looked down at himself and realized that his hair was matted with goo, and his clothes were an unpleasant mix of slime and sand, immediately understanding that he was incredibly sticky.

"Damn frog. Where the hell am I supposed to cle-" Naruto muttered before his teenage counter part grabbed him by the back of his black and orange jump suit and threw him off the cliff. Naruto, by this point knowing better than to question why he was flying through the air, realized he felt lighter than ever.

"DO A BARREL ROLL!" Naruto heard from behind him. He laughed while he started doing flips and twists in the air until he hit the ground with a thud, only to bounce twice and land in a lake.

"That son of a-" Naruto muttered before looking up to see the bastard sitting right in front of him at the edge of the lake. " OK LISTEN YO-," he started with a giant tick mark appearing while pointing at him with his accusatory finger, before the lake began to glow and he immediately felt warm, as the water was giving him a hug. After a few minutes of sitting in the water he felt good as new, he decided to climb out of the water, but to his surprise, he found himself unable to feel any chakra at all. It was an odd feeling seeing as how he was usually overflowing with it, he felt as if a piece of him was missing. He could sense it was there, but he felt as if it was locked away. Slightly worried he decided to swim over to the teen and finally get some answers. "Ok. You have some explaining to do. And would it #$%# kill you to let me finish a #$!$ sentence?" Naruto said raising his voice at the guy.

"Oh my, some one woke up on the wrong side of the universe," he replied lazily, "I might have gotten a little ahead of myself, it happens. Now time to get down to business. You, my friend, are entering a tournament. You will win. You will go back home and live your life, nothing more nothing less." The guy said suddenly serious. "If you do lose, however, your ass is mine, and it will surely be skinned. We will be training for days straight, weeks straight, months straight no matter how long it takes. You will win even if it kills us." The man's presence suddenly let up slightly. "There are a few more things we have to take care of though," the guy said as his facial expression lightening and a grin slowly appearing. "We have to take a look at your chakra, get you a familiar, a weapon of choice, get our training ground ready, find the other contestant that started in this area, oh and you have someone to meet. Oh and not to mention new clothes." The man said cracking up at the sight. Naruto then realized this was going to be a long day.

OMAKE

"Ow…ow, ow, ow… OW! WHAT THE HELL IS WITH ALL THESE BRANCHES?" Naruto yelled while repeatedly getting slapped in the face by various branches. Naruto rubbed his face, "Where did that bastard get off to?" Slowing down he decided to slow down and take a breather. Finally coming to a complete stop he tried to catch his breath, only to find himself falling, "WHAAAA" After about 2 to 3 minutes of falling he crossed his arms and pouted, "Ok you have GOT to be kidding me, what the fu-" He landed face first on something soft. He decided to squeeze it to test what it was until he heard a deep moan. He looked down and realized he was squeezing the fire lords sleeping wife's boob. "OH YES MY BIG BAD FIRE LORD MOOORE!" She yelled hugging Naruto…squeezing the life out of him…literally. The boy looked around to see if there was anyone else watching, mortified of his position… and the fact that he a ninja was dying to a fat old lady. He laid his eyes on Tora the cat, who seemed to be rolling around on the ground laughing his ass off. "HAHAHAHAHA oooh finally I get to see someone else in this firkin monsters clutches. OOOOOOH this is just too good," Tora the cat gasped out while still rolling around. "This is what you get for continuously returning me to that woman's clutches. Before standing up on his back legs, pulling a video camera out of nowhere and recording the scene. With another round of laughter, Tora promptly scratched up Naruto's face… because he could and turned around bounding off into the cave leaving behind the words, " Just wait till your friends at Konoha get a load of this. Oh this is so going on the internet." Naruto just looked at the cat wide eyed, incapable of comprehending what just happened. "What…. The… NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Naruto screamed after the cat that was long gone. His last words were echoed through the cave as the last piece of his natural born life was squeezed out, "Well, played Tora… well played," he breathed out, "Damn cat…" he wheezed with his last breath before going limp from oxygen.

About 2 hours later the Daimyo's wife woke up to an orange man laying on top of her in her custom made cave that her husband sent her to when he needed to get work done… or get rid of her. She took a quick glance at Naruto before a shadow covered her face and all the could be seen where to white dots and a white smile with drool coming out of it. (Think taokaka) "A new toooy….toooooy" she said as she hungrily dragged Naruto's body deeper into the cave. The boy was never seen again.

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