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Chapter 2: The Almighty Google

When we arrived at my house I jumped out of the car and rushed to the front door, eager to get inside and Itachi proof my room.

Shoving my key into the keyhole, I unlocked the door and push it open just in time to hear a loud crash come from upstairs. Instantly I see my mom run out of the kitchen, face and hands covered in flour.

"Minato, honey?" She calls with a worried look. Her long red hair was pulled back in a messy bun and was currently sporting a fine coat of flour as well.

From the second floor I heard my dad yell, "I'm fine! Don't worry, dear!"

"What's dad doing?" I ask after the features on my mom's face relax. She gave me a sympathetic look.

No.

He couldn't be.

I run up the stairs like my life depends on it. My eyes dart to the bathroom door which is cracked open just enough to let me see the horror that has befallen me.

My dad was currently kneeling behind the toilet working a rather large wrench over some metal pipes. I swallow hard.

Good bye twenty-first century plumbing, hello dark ages.

"Dad," I ask hesitantly, "What are you doing?"

Minato Uzumaki looks up at me with a determined look on his face. He smiles brilliantly, "I had some free time on my hands so I decided to fix the toilet."

"Dad," I say weakly, "It wasn't broken."

The blonde man frowns, "Yes it was." He stood up and cracked his back, "It was making a weird sound when it flushed."

Noticing the look of horror on my face, my dad walked over to me and patted me on the shoulder, "Don't worry, Naruto. It will be as good as new in a couple of hours."

No, Dad. It wasn't…because you have a magical touch.

"Like the basement sink?" I mutter darkly.

"That wasn't because of me. The pipes were ancient so the whole thing needed to be replaced."

"How about the air conditioning system?" I asked wryly.

My dad hesitated for a moment, but then an answer came to him, "That was hardly my fault. I didn't know you could short circuit the whole thing!"

"Minato," I hear Sasuke's voice echo from a few feet away. My head instantly snaps to it and finds Sasuke standing in the hall with his gym bag slung over his shoulder, "Please don't tell me you're fixing the toilet."

I see the corner of my dad's eye twitch.

Sasuke sounded just like his Fugaku, it was hilarious!

If there was one person to talk some sense into my doctor dad, it was Fugaku Uchiha.

My dad clears his throat and grins at us, "I'll have it fixed before dinner or my name isn't Minato Uzumaki!"

Needless to say, the toilet was still broken by the time mom called us down to dinner.

Sasuke and I entered the kitchen to find Itachi and my mom chatting up a storm. However, upon seeing us enter the room, they both seemed to suddenly suffer from a case of speechlessness. I shoved my hands into my denim jean pockets and furrowed my eyebrows to let them know I was one hundred percent positive they were talking about me.

"Itachi," I heard Sasuke say beside me.

The older Uchiha smirked and strode over to us, effectively tousling Sasuke's hair. "Hello, little brother." He looked over at me with a glint in his eye and poked me in the forehead, "Naru-chan."

I remind myself that my mom was watching and that any unruly behavior performed in front of her eyes would be a serious miscalculation on my part.

Swallowing the urge to grab Itachi by his overly grown hair, I plaster on a smile.

"Has your father fixed the bathroom yet?" My mom asked me as she started to bring out the food to the already set table. Turning my attention towards her, I slump my shoulders. Grabbing a bowl of steaming rice I walk over to the dinner table and place it in the center. Then exhaling deeply I answer her question, "What do you think?"

Before she could reply the heavy footfalls of my father could be heard rushing down the stairs. His spiky blonde head appeared in the dining room shortly after, "Dinner! What are we having today, honey?"

"How's the bathroom coming?" She asked him with one hand on her hip and a frown marring her pleasant face.

I couldn't help snorting.

Itachi took this as an opportunity to smack me upside the head.

Minato rubbed the back of his neck nervously as he looked at his wife, "Um…its going," he bobs his head, "But I don't think I'll be able to finish it today. But tomorrow looks very promising!"

"If it's not fixed by tomorrow, I'm calling the plumber," Kushina glowered, her eyes blazing, "One more day, sweetness. And if it's not fixed by then…well then you better start praying."

My dad visibly swallowed.

"Sasuke," My mother turned to my best friend with a sweet smile, "Can you bring in the dumplings I made?"

Sasuke nods and zips out of the dining room.

Five minutes later we were all sitting down at the table enjoying my mom's slightly burnt beef stew. I do not know how you burn beef stew.

Like I've said before, I'm just a teenager.

If you want to learn how to burn your beef stew, ask my mother. She's a pro at burning stuff. Don't believe me? Ask anyone at the table.

I bite into my dumpling and wince as the hot juice scalds my tongue. Giving a loud yelp I drop my fork and reach for my glass of water. Out of the corner of my eye I see Sasuke roll his eyes at me while Itachi just shakes his head.

Almost immediately I feel my face flame.

So glad that the people at school only know me as the cool, fun guy instead of the impulsive overgrown child that I am.

"So, Itachi?" My father started, "How is that girl you were seeing last week?"

Both my ears and Sasuke's perked up with interest. This was news to us.

Itachi had been seeing a girl?

"She's good," Itachi nodded. "I'll actually be seeing her in a few days. We're going to study for our upcoming midterms together."

I grin, "Studying, huh?"

I see Sasuke smirk and my grin widens. From across the table, Itachi throws me a murderous look. His eyes narrow as the grip on his fork tightens.

Yep, I was pretty happy with myself right about now. "What exactly are you two going to be studying together? Anatomy?"

"Naruto," my mother clears her throat, grabbing my attention, "You still have the steamed asparagus on your plate."

I looked down and stare at the eight miniature trees lying on my plate, and growl. They weren't even a nice shade of green!

Puke green!

I was supposed to eat this poor excuse of a vegetable that not only looked unappetizing but tasted like shit as well.

What was I, five? Since when did seniors in high school need to eat their vegetables? I looked at my mom who was expectantly waiting for me to pop one of them trees in my mouth. I was about to open my mouth to complain only to be cut off before I even started.

"They're good for your colon! Now eat, Naruto." She gave me a stern look, "No son of mine is going to be walking around with an unhealthy colon. You too, Sasuke."

The raven haired boy looked up, startled. "What?"

"You heard me," my mother smiled kindly at him, "Your mother and I have been reading through your father's medical journals. Mikoto read somewhere that many teenagers suffer from weak colons –"

"Yeah," I cut in, "In third world countries!"

One look from my mom had me automatically go on mute.

"Greens such as spinach, asparagus and brussels sprouts contain the necessary vitamins and minerals to make sure you are both healthy and strong. Now, neither of you are to leave this table until the serving of greens is gone from your plates."

Sasuke stared aghast at my mother, "How about Itachi?"

"I, little brother," Itachi smirked, "Already ate them."

My hand tightened firmly around my fork as I brought that disgusting vegetable to my mouth. Since when did my mom read medical journals? Sure, she was the wife of a doctor…but she never took interest in these things before! And look! My dad didn't eat this crap and he had a perfectly healthy colon!

After suffering heavily through dinner, Sasuke and I were finally excused from the table. Luckily for us, Itachi was going back to Sasuke's house. That meant that all our hard work on weasel proofing my room was for naught. Still, it was good to know that Sasuke and I would be left in peace. As soon as we were excused, we ran up to my room. Sasuke had the foresight to lock my bedroom door just in case my mom decided to pop in. It would definitely be awkward if she found us researching how to kiss.

How embarrassing would that be? Very. Uber embarrassing times infinity.

As I logged on to my laptop, Sasuke jumped on the bed next to me and waited patiently for me to type in my password. I didn't ask him to look away.

Why bother? Sometimes I thought he knew me better then I knew myself.

A minute later I had opened up my web browser and was staring at Google's homepage. The famous logo blaring at me mockingly. Like it knew what I was about to search. For a second I caught myself wondering if anyone could trace what I was about to Google.

"What are you waiting for? Sasuke said. Apparently he had run out of patience. I shot him a dirty look.

"What exactly am I supposed to search?"

He rubbed the bridge of his nose, eyes closed in evident annoyance. "Just Google 'how to kiss,' dobe."

Sucking in my cheeks I quickly typed 'how to kiss' into the search bar and held my breath as the results page loaded. In one quick movement, Sasuke grabbed the computer from my lap and took control over our covert operation. I didn't mind much. He was the smarter one, I'd leave all the difficult decision making to him.

I watched him study the computer screen with anticipation. A few clicks later, Sasuke grabbed the sleeve of my shirt and pulled me towards him. "Look."

I turned my head to look at the screen and began to read, " Kissing can be a hard thing to do until you get comfortable doing it, and while nothing can fully prepare you for a kiss, this how-to will explain some of the basics of kissing a partner and explore some simple kissing do's and don't's." (1) I shrugged and straightened up on the bed as Sasuke took over reading.

"The lead up to the kiss can actually be the most difficult part of kissing. Figuring out whether your partner is ready to kiss you or not can be a challenge of its own." (1)

"Well we don't have to worry much about that," I gripe, "Everyone wants a piece of us." I wiggle my eyebrows. Sasuke just threw me a pitying look before rolling his eyes and focusing his attention back on the screen.

"Okay, dobe." He scrolled down the page, "Grab a piece of paper. I'm going to read off a list of kissing indicators."

I look at him dumbfounded, "You want me to take notes?"

A slight pink hue appears on the Uchiha's cheeks as he clears his throat, "Just write this down."

Grumbling under my breath I scooted off the bed and walked over to my desk. My hands instantly going to my bottom left drawer. Pulling out a piece of paper, I grabbed a pen from my pencil holder and marched back to the bed. Sidling up to Sasuke I grunted, letting him know that I was ready.

"Indicators are softening of the eyes, eye contact, head turning slightly, lips are either bitten or licked. Some form of physical contact…put down touching shoulder or leg as an example."

I grumble to myself but do as Sasuke says, writing in an example of a physical touch.

"Okay, conversation stops but eye contact isn't broken, smiling…lots of smiling."

I continue to take notes as Sasuke reads off the computer screen. When we finally get down to the bottom of the page I had acquired two pages of notes, double sided.

"Practice makes perfect," Sasuke read the last line and looked up.

I flexed my fingers trying to rid them of the cramp I had developed from taking notes.

I haven't written so much in a ten minute interval in my whole life! Even in school I had never taken such precise notes!

This better be worth it.

Glancing at Sasuke I frown. He had his thinking face on again.

"Sasuke?"

"Hn."

I scratch my ear, "What are you thinking about?"

"The instructions said practice makes perfect," he looks at me uncertainly, "Practice."

"How are we supposed to practice?" I fling the papers onto my bed and collapse onto it, grabbing a pillow and crushing it to my chest. "With dolls? I don't even have any!"

Sasuke looked at me curiously, his hands resting on his knees. I looked up at him and noticed he was wearing his thinking face again.

"Hey," I sat up, nudging him in the shoulder, "You got an idea?"

His eyes shifted nervously for a split second. If you hadn't known Sasuke for as long as I have, you wouldn't have even noticed. My hand drops, "Sasuke…"

"You're not going to like it."

I really hated hearing those words. They always boded ill for my psyche.

Instantly my body tensed, prepping itself for what was no doubt going to be something that I'd probably have to do no matter what I thought. Rubbing the back of my neck nervously, I shot Sasuke a weary smile. Cueing him that I was ready to hear whatever he had to say.

"We do it with each other."

Yep.

He was right.

I didn't like this at all.

"You're joking, right?" I give a nervous laugh. His eyebrows furrow and I think I just saw what seemed to be a slight blush appear on his cheeks.

"I'm not," he said stubbornly. "How else are we going to get feedback? What if we suck and think we're good?"

"Teme," I grumble, "How the hell are we supposed to figure out if we're good or not? We don't know the first thing about making out!"

"If it feels good we're doing it right," Sasuke crossed his arms and glared at me like somehow all this way my fault. "If it's bad then we're doing it wrong."

"Um, hello?" I wave my hand in front of his face, "It won't feel good because we're both dudes!"

Seriously, I thought he was smarter than me. Do I look like a skirt wearing, face painting, bra wearing individual to you? I surely hope not.

"That's not true," he said dryly, "It has nothing to do with what gender you are. A kiss is a kiss. Besides, guys do kiss each other and enjoy it."

"Uh, yeah," I raise my voice, "Cause they're fucking gay!"

Sasuke rolls his eyes at me, "Well then how do you propose we do this? If you have any ideas please, share them because I don't see any other way around this."

I open my mouth to say something and stop.

How the hell were we supposed to practice?

Dolls wouldn't work, their mouths don't open and kiss back.

Pillows don't even have mouths.

"…."

"Well," Sasuke looks at me expectantly, "I'm waiting."

Shit.

I have no fucking clue.

Shutting my eyes tight, I let my head droop, "Okay."

"Fine," Sasuke grabs me by the arm and pulls me to his front. With only a few inches separating us from each other, I gulp.

"We tell no one," I clarify as my eyes lock with his.

"You think I'm an idiot like you, dobe?"

Well that wasn't very nice you shit face. I furrowed my brow angrily, letting him know that I found no humor in his lame statement.

"This also doesn't mean we're gay," I gripe, "It's just a learning experience."

He rolls his eyes at me again, "We're not gay, dumbass."

"What the fuck, Sasuke!" I raise my voice, "Stop it!"

His head jumps back, startled, "What?"

I cross my arms furiously, "Quit the dumb assery. Stop being such a dick!"

"Sorry," he apologizes almost immediately. His eyes fall to my cotton blend sheets, "Hn."

"Yeah, I know." The tension leaves my body and I run a hand through my spiky hair. Hoping to somehow get rid of that butterfly feeling in my stomach, "I'm nervous too, so let's just do it."

He nods and his shadow black eyes come to meet with mine. I swallow and try to smile just like the instructions said. A few seconds later Sasuke snorts and starts laughing. I give him a murderous glare and cross my arms, "What?"

He covers his mouth in an attempt to deafen the snorting, "Your face looks funny."

I blanche, "Sasuke!" My cheeks no doubt have turned red by this point as consequence for my face flaming up, "You're not helping!"

Sasuke let out one more chuckle before finally restraining himself and sitting back in front of me, back straight. His face was stony, a mask of indifference but his eyes…they were still fucking laughing at me! I pinch his arm and his eyebrow twitches.

Good, the laughing at my obvious humiliation has ceased.

"Don't smile, dobe." He said, "Just relax. Remember, the instructions said you had to loosen your muscles, soften your lips."

Instantly my tongue darted out of my mouth and licked my lips. Sasuke gave me a wry look and I shrugged, "I'm moistening them."
"Whatever."

He pulled closer to me and our eyes met.

I stared into them, noticing for the first time a hint of red in his onyx black eyes. They stared back at me just as intently as I was staring into them. I licked my lips again nervously.

"You know," Sasuke said in barely above a whisper, "You have really, really blue eyes."

I swallowed and reached out to touch his sleeved arm. Remembering that physical contact was a must before the actual lip lock. Slowly, his hand came to rest on my thigh. Fingertips gently brushing against the denim fabric before his whole palm came to rest atop it. The heat from his hand oddly made my whole body tingle.

A good tingle.

His head tilted to the side ever so slightly before slowly moving towards me.

My eyes left his and traveled gradually down to his lips. I found myself thinking he had a very nice mouth. Slowly I leaned in as well, letting my eyes drift to half mast as our breaths hit against each other.

I felt my whole body pulse in anticipation. Each nerve ending painfully aware of every breeze, every touch and every arrow of fire shooting into my stomach. The distance between us grew shorter and shorter. Our lips only a hairsbreadth apart. Closing my eyes fully, I let my lips touch his.

(1)-www. instructables. com/ id/How-to-Kiss/-the google page sasuke and naruto found.

To Be Continued…