Chapter 1
A/N: I apologise for not having this up last night, I was out and didn't get back until late. I don't know when I will be uploading the next chapter as I have a deadline coming up so I am really busy at the moment. I will try to get it up as soon as possible though and hopefully soon I will be able to start making regular uploads.
Disclaimer: As always I do not own Sanctuary or any of the characters just borrowing them.
Nikola looked around for the right place to start his search, where he had left her right before the explosion. All he could see was rubble and even though he thought it must be a good thing that there were no severed limbs on display he couldn't stop the feeling of despair weigh him down further as he saw no signs of life. Unable to push them away, unwanted visions of Helen's body, mutilated and burnt filled his head. Why did he leave her?
The thought continued to haunt him as he completed his search through the rubble which was slow and tiresome but Nikola remained determined not to stop until he found some evidence of her. Evidence, what did he expect to find? He knew what he wanted to find, her, her body, living, breathing, undamaged. Helen. The way she was before he left her.
Hours later Nikola finally accepted that he wasn't going to find anything. What did that mean? Surely if she had been caught in the blast there would be some proof of it, some form of remains even if they weren't identifiable. No, the fire must have destroyed them completely. There was no way around it; she couldn't have escaped, Helen couldn't be alive.
Time seemed to be passing slowly or rather everything seemed to be in slow motion. Nikola sat at the bar in his apartment building cradling an empty glass. Alcohol wouldn't help; it didn't affect him, he couldn't use it as a way to escape it would only be a waste of good wine to drink in his grief. He felt as empty as the glass. He could not, would not think about Helen but it seemed like every memory he had included her. It was best just to keep his mind blank and grief at bay.
"Are you all right sir?" he jumped at the question, forgetting that he was in fact not alone, "'only you've been sat there for hours, we're closing up." He turned slightly and stared at the waitress with a vacant expression, after a minute with only this response the woman left to finish cleaning the tables. The bar staff eventually gave up on trying to get him to leave and signed off. Nikola was once more alone with little to distract him from the numbness he was now feeling. It was like something was feeding off his emotions leaving him with nothing, even pain would have been better.
The sun was dawning again by the time he made it to his room. He moved to the window where he stayed looking out until he could no longer bear the thought that Helen would never look out this window, she would never be able to appreciate this view and he thought that without her he would no longer be able to appreciate it either. Nikola finally turned away from the window so that he was directly facing the front door. He frowned slightly as he saw what looked like an envelope on the floor there as if it had been pushed under. He moved to pick it up. Only one word was written on the envelope, his name, Nikola. He felt his stomach summersault as he traced his finger over the all too familiar handwriting. His hand shook as he opened the letter and read.
Nikola please meet me at the gate to the old Sanctuary tonight at 10pm. There is something I need to show you, things I need to explain and I think it would be better to do it in person. Make sure you are there. Tonight. 10pm.
Helen