It was well past midnight when Sebastian finally left Jim. He woke, slumped over in the armchair across from him, head pounding and an empty glass of bourbon in his hand. Jim lay curled up in the chair, passed out, but looking peaceful, his breathing was soft, and quiet. Seb thought about waking him up for a moment, scolding himself for even thinking that and he put his glass down, fetching the envelope and sticking it to the television with a small piece of tape.

"There you are. Read that before you leave." He gently tousles Jim's hair and fetches his coat, glancing around the darkened house one last time and leaving without a trace.

O

It was his alarm that woke him up, the vibrating is his pocket and the annoying beeping. Jim screwed his eyes shut, trying to block it out as his brain jumpstarted for the morning, a low level headache setting in from the amount of drinking done the night before. He smiles, opening his eyes and searching for Seb across the coffee table. He's startled to see he isn't there. Jim had planned on taking him to the aeroport. …. The aeroport. Jim sits up quickly, rubbing his eyes and straightening out. He glances at the tele, pulling the envelope off and stuffing it in his pocket.

"I'll read it on the way." He screws his face up, searching for his jacket but leaving when he couldn't find it, not bothering to lock the door behind him. He slides into his car, keys in hand, pulling out of the driveway faster than he should and speeding down the street. "Bloody stupid. I should have- He should have woken me up." He checks the time. "Shit. Okay…" Quickly, he calculates a route through traffic that will get him there before six. He swears again, lightly hitting the steering wheel. "Idiot."

OO

Sebastian watches as the plane pulls away, the Earth growing smaller underneath him. He frowns.

"Good bye London." He says quietly and falls silent for some time before speaking in a small whisper again. "Good bye Jim."

OOO

Jim is running through the airport, staring at his phone.

"Nearly six. I've got time. I've got time." He skids to a stop in front of the flight schedule, searching for Seb's flight number. Finding it he scans across for the departure time. Five thirty. His heart sinks. No. No. Seb had said six. Seb had said six hadn't he? Hadn't he? Numbly he recalls the words Seb had said yesterday.

"Don't open it until I'm gone." He had said. Jim sunk into a seated position on the bench next to the schedule. He keeps shaking his head. No. No no no. No. Seb wouldn't do that… Not to him. He wouldn't…. It's just cruel. He wouldn't do that. With trembling hands he reaches into his coat pocket, pulling out the sealed envelope, turning it over several times in his hands before sliding his index finger under the flap and dragging it across, separating the seal from the body of the envelope. He licks his lips before pulling the single sheet of paper out and unfolding it. The sides of his mouth turn up as he recognizes Seb's hand writing.

Jimmy.

It read.

Yeah, you probably hate me right now. Which is fine. But I want you to know that I'm shit at goodbyes so that's why I had to go. But don't worry because I'll be coming back. And I'll try and keep in contact as much as possible. Just make sure you take care of yourself.

It isn't signed. And that's all it says. Jim's lips twitch, as if trying to decide whether to frown or to smile. He bites his bottom lip. He crumples the note in his hand and shoves it in his pocket as he stands up, the feeling of being cold rushing over him.

OOOO

Month 1 Email 1

Seb. It's been a month. I've heard nothing from you. What's going on?

Month 1.5 Email 5

I've waited two months Sebastian. This is pointless. You don't answer anything anymore…. Hey, I miss you. Sebastian, I think that you'll never get these. I'm saving them in a folder in my email. You go through them anyway. Maybe when you get back you'll look at them. I should have told you… You were busy so I never got around to it. I've had this planned for a while now. Ten and a half months actually. Yes dear, I plan a year ahead…

Anyway, I figure I should tell you, just in case... I was hoping you'd be home by now, but knowing the army, you'll be gone for several months. I just… I want you to know that I've only got three more months to live.

And you aren't here to stop that.

Don't think that I planned this just because I miss you, because I DON'T miss you. At all. I planned this almost a year ago in the hopes that you would save my life. Maybe you still can. I don't know. It's all in the timing. Hey, I don't want you to come home and be so surprised that I'm gone, and think that maybe I killed myself and then feel guilty because you weren't here. No. Because that's totally wrong.

I think that if I keep telling myself that I don't miss you… That maybe it'll come true.

Month 2 Email 26

The day of my depart keeps getting closer and it kind of scares me Seb.

Month 2.5 Email 51

I have a month and a half, Seb.

And I've finally come to the realization. I need you. I do. I didn't think I did, I thought that it'd be okay, that everything was going to be okay, that you don't really serve a purpose except to shoot for me. And occasionally take me out for drinks and dinner. But… I need you for more than that. I didn't really think about it before. And you know, it's awful because I know I probably won't see you again. I know I considered you my best friend. I didn't really have friends before, so I didn't know how to treat you. You called me your best mate though. You even stayed with me, your final night in London, and you stayed with me. No one has ever done anything like that for me before.

A month and a half.

Maybe you'll get shot and discharged so I can fix this…

That's a bit selfish.

Month 3 Email 100

Thirty days.

Thirty days until the end.

Why did you leave me behind Seb? I don't know if I can… Who am I kidding. I can. I can do this myself. I've always done it myself. Always. And I'm Jim Moriarty. I can do anything. I own him. I can manipulate him.

I'm not going to die. I've got things to do still. I've got a whole life I had planned Seb. And, normally, I would say that it's your fault that I'm going to die.

Because it might be.

But… You deserve better than that. Just… Seb, just promise me one thing. Promise me that, when you check these, you'll get him. You'll get that son of a bitch. Because it's all his fault you know. It's all Sherlock's fault. If all goes as planned, he'll be dying that night too. And if I'm very lucky, I'll make his pet watch.

Author's Note: One more chapter. Awyeah. I think the next one's going to be a tear jerker… I hope. I'm not very good at this am I? Oh well. This fandom is perfect. Don't forget to review, and I love you all so… Much love in that department. Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it. I'll try to have the last chapter up in a few days. It's getting difficult due to rehearsals, but…. Anyway, don't forget to review, it doesn't bite. I do.