This took longer than it should have to post, and I apologise profusely for it. God, I love boys being boys. They're just so fun to write. I don't know what possessed me to include the diary extract, but I love it. It just seems like a very James thing to do.

Lessons in Love series

Lesson the Second - Secrets

It was just after the Easter holidays of their second year that Sirius, James and Peter connected all of the dots. When they did, he was a little astounded that they worked it out and more than a little appalled that he didn't do so months earlier.

It was all so obvious afterwards, looking back. All the poor excuses, more ill relatives than it is physiologically possible to have and a great grandmother that must've died at least three times. Absences like clockwork, every four weeks without fail. And always coming back looking exhausted and visibly sore, sometimes limping or walking stiffly.

Peter, of all people, had been the first to take notice - pointing out the newer injuries and the old scars, throwing out words like neglect and abuse. For the two smartest boys in their year, Sirius and James had been remarkably slow on the uptake, and both had fervently denied all of Peter's observations. Repeatedly and forcefully.

Sirius liked to tell himself that he was respecting Remus' privacy by not prying. The truth was probably that he was a little afraid that if they got too much into what constituted 'abuse' and 'neglect' he wouldn't be able to restrain himself from blurting out everything about his own family, which delved quite deeply into both of those categories.

James, for whatever reason, also seemed eager to ignore Peter's observation at first. Sirius, however, wasn't his best friend for nothing. He had known James long enough by then to know he had a rather significant noble streak, an urge to play the hero in every story. He could see it boiling over, churning in James mind more and more often. Sometimes Sirius had to nudge him forcefully in the ribs to stop him from staring at Remus like he was an interesting puzzle.

' I've had enough!' James declared, the next time Remus vanished amid mutterings of a sickly parent. ' I need to know what's going on!'

Sirius couldn't help but laugh. ' God forbid you don't know something eh, Jamie?'

' Don't call me that,' he snapped, then added dejectedly, ' I can't cope with this for five more years.'

' You can't stand that he might be being hurt, can you? Bloody hell, your nobility is annoying.'

' You want to know as much as I do!'

' Out of pure curiosity!' Sirius lied.

' We all want to know,' Peter chimed in from the window seat. ' We're all worried about him.'

' Well then,' James said, face lighting up with mischief. ' I say we find out.'

It was almost two months later when they continued the discussion. It would have been one, but a spontaneous urge to charm the toilets to regurgitate everything landed them all in detention on the night of Remus' mysterious excursion. They had all agreed to watch him closer, then decide what to do about it while he was absent.

Remus had left earlier that afternoon. Peter was once again perched on the windowsill, James was sprawled sideways across his bed and Sirius lay spread-eagled on the floor between James and his own four-poster.

' What if it is abuse?'

' It just doesn't make sense!'

' What other options are there? He goes off with his dad and comes back bruised to buggery!'

' It just doesn't sit right,' Sirius pressed. ' He talks about his family all the time, perfectly happily. He wouldn't be able to-'

' It's called pretending! Anybody can do it! Would you want people to know your dad hit you?'

No, Sirius thought. That's why I haven't told you.

' No, but…' He wanted to say I'd know, I'd be able to tell, but he couldn't, so he said instead, ' Nobody's that good at pretending.'

' Well maybe Remus is,' James said, rather pathetically. ' What do you think, Pete?'

Peter didn't move, still staring out of the window.

' Peter?' James repeated, a bit louder. Still no response.

Sirius clamber silently off the floor and inched towards the smallest boy as quietly as he could. When he was close enough, he leaned down and huffed a breath at the nape of Peter's neck, making him shiver, before grabbing his shoulders suddenly. It had the desired effect, causing the littler boy to jump comically high before landing in a heap.

' Back with us now?' James laughed as Peter pulled himself back into some sort of human shape.

' Yeah, thanks. Just what I needed, scaring half to death. Who'd have thought.'

' You looked lost in thought, Petey-boy. Easy enough, I suppose. Not somewhere you go often, is it? Thought I'd give you a hand getting out again.'

Peter only humphed at Sirius as he settled himself back on the windowsill.

' I was looking at the moon,' he said with great dignity for someone who had moments before been a tangled mass on the floor. ' It's full tonight, nice and bright. It was last time we talked about this, too.' He looked thoughtful, then turned to the others, smiling slightly. ' Don't suppose you think Remus is a werewolf?'

Though clearly stated as a joke, the words hung between them. James gawked at Peter then at Sirius, who was staring back with wide eyes.

' You don't-'

' - could be-'

' - never have-'

' - have you got-'

' Yeah, over here. You grab-'

' Don't need it.'

James ran to his bed and pulled an old black journal out from under his mattress. Sirius waited for him to flick through it. It was over half full, all the pages covered in James haphazardly scrawled writing. When he reached the right page, he scanned it quickly, then clamped the book against his chest.

' Go on,' he said, nodding to Sirius. ' Then I know you aren't just guessing.'

Sirius thought for a moment, working it out in his head, then said with every confidence, ' Eighteenth.'

' Bugger,' was James' only reply, having no doubt about Sirius' Astronomy knowledge.

He held out the book revealing a page that was headed with the date.

18th March, 1973

Alas. The day of retribution hath arrived. Detention. Worse still, detention with McGooglies. I have it better off than Sirius though, because he is stuck with Slughorn, who will no doubt rant the entire time about the travesty of Sirius' miss-sorting. Peter is with Merlin-only-knows-who. Possibly Filch. I can't remember. I hope it is. He deserves it, for not being the voice of reason and telling us what an awful idea it is to make toilets regurgitate. For future reference - it is, indeed, well and truly, god-fearingly awful. Never do it again.

' Bugger,' Sirius echoed. Three full moons in a row was a bit more than coincidence.

They stared at one another across the open book before a very pale looking Peter stepped forward and muttered, ' But I was only joking.'

Not one of them slept that night, though they didn't really talk much either. The day passed in a strange, anticipatory hush that nobody wanted to break. When Remus returned to the dorm after dinner, it was nearly silent. Two boys sat on their own beds, and Sirius himself was settled firmly on Remus'.

' Alright, Remus?' James greeted. ' How's your mum?'

He was forcing a casual tone and failing miserably. It was a fact Remus clearly picked up on, because he froze in the middle of walking to his trunk. He stiffened and eyed them warily. Sirius thought he looked more like a squirrel, in that moment, than a wolf.

His gaze flicked from James, who was trying his damndest to smile normally, to Peter, who was trying to hide behind a particularly small looking throw pillow, to Sirius, who raised his eyebrows expectantly.

Remus swallowed visibly before he asked quietly, ' What's up?'

James opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius held up a hand to stop him. Thankfully it worked. James would no doubt have gone into an encouraging talk about loyalty and friendship and the like, which would end up a twenty-or-so minute presentation. Not to mention a complete tangent.

There was a time and a place for tact, and this wasn't it.

' We know,' Sirius said, voice clear and loud in the quiet room. ' Let's drop the pretence, eh?'

' Right,' Remus said, with a resigned little smile. ' Of course you do. Trust me to befriend the smartest boys in the year.'

' Try in the school,' Sirius grinned. ' I mean, did anyone else figure it out?'

' No,' Remus answered, giving Sirius a strange closed look but keeping his calm. ' No, they didn't. Won't have the chance now, I suppose.' He sighed. ' I'll just get my stuff and then I'll go.'

' What?' Sirius said, voice rising a bit with his surprise. ' Go where?'

' You can't leave!' James cried, jumping off his bed.

It was Remus' turn to sound surprised, ' You don't want me to-'

' Of course not!' James shouted, moving closer still.

' Why would we want that?' Sirius asked, genuinely confused.

' You couldn't possibly still want to share a room with me,' Remus explained, as though it were obvious. When neither boy reacted, he added, ' I'm a monster.'

The dark-haired boys exchanged a look, then smirked.

' The only monster in this room,' James said.

' Is the one that lives under Pete's bed,' Sirius finished.

Peter, who had not spoken at all, looked startled at being dragged into the conversation.

' There isn't anything living under my bed,' he mumbled, eyeing the foot of it warily nonetheless. After a moments hesitation, he scrambled off it and joined the other three in the middle of the room.

Remus looked a little stunned. His expression was carefully blank, forced calm, but Sirius took note of how he was blinking more often than strictly necessary and a little crease appeared between his eyebrows. James must have noticed too, because he threw his arm around the werewolf and gave him a stunted sort of half-hug in the way only teenage boys can.

' We've lived with you for nearly two years, Remus,' James said.

' We know you aren't a monster,' Sirius elaborated. ' At least not twenty eight days out of twenty nine.'

' And we can forgive you the one,' Peter put in, grinning sheepishly.

Remus stopped his excessive blinking to stare at the smallest of them, eyebrow raising out of habit. Sirius looked at James, who was beaming proudly at Pete, then burst into laughter. The others followed fairly swiftly, and after a very incoherent quarter of an hour they had been reduced to a heap of gangling limbs and little hiccups of mirth.

Sirius will always remember that Remus didn't cry.