The World Is Hell
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Rainbow Six, Corvette, or Invader Zim.
Chapter 2: And God Said...
Dib woke up. He had become rather muscular from his Special Forces training. He was wearing a black muscle shirt and boxer shorts. He took a glance at his alarm clock, and noticed that it was 9:00 AM.
"Damn. Late for work again. At this rate, I'll never get a fucking decent assignment." Dib shuddered as he thought of the last time he was late for work- his CO had given him a choice: clean the bathrooms or take naked pictures of Gaz. Obviously, he chose the former; he figured he was too young to die, at age 31. A large viewscreen taking up one whole wall of his condo's living room came on, and Zim's face appeared.
"Why, hello there, Dib-human. It's been a long time." Zim said in his usual manner.
"Fuck off, Zim. I don't need your shit." Dib replied.
"Dib-human, I know about your involvement with RAINBOW. Hell, I know about everything you've ever done since I started ruling the Earth, which is getting drunk on a nightly basis, fucking your girlfriend, and joining RAINBOW, which appears to have put some discipline in you; you haven't done the former two activities since being put in Ding's unit." Zim plodded on and on.
"I said, fuck off. I'm already late for work." Dib said, becoming increasingly agitated.
GIR appeared on the screen and started babbling in his usual manner.
"Hey, Dib! Long time no see!" GIR said excitedly. Zim pushed him out of the way.
"Okay, fine. Be that way." Zim turned around, and the viewscreen turned off.
Dib took a quick shower, put on his uniform, and left for the former CIA building. The sky was its normal blue color again, and had been that way for a good seven years now- tyrannical and inept as Zim was, he had cleaned up the air a ridiculous amount. He drove past the school, which had a memorial to Professor Membrane in front of it. A tear dropped from Dib's eye as he passed it- as horrible a father as Professor Membrane had been, he was the only father Dib and Gaz ever had and they loved him. He arrived at the CIA building in record time- he was kicking himself for not having bought back his souped-up Corvette C6.R from his teenage years earlier.
Dib walked through the entrance, and Gaz was waiting for him. She was already wearing her body armor, her Dragunov SVD sniper rifle was slung over her shoulder, and she was playing her Game Slave 18913 impatiently.
"What the fuck took you so long, bro? Scratch that, I don't need to know what it was," Gaz said. "We got our new assignment. We have to take down Zim."
"What the fuck... Has Jack been smoking anything recently?" Dib sputtered. "Zim's fortress is so well-defended that every intruder has been killed as soon as he walked into the doorway. There's no way in hell we're getting past."
"We shall see. Personally, I'm surprised too," Gaz said calmly. Dib went into the armory, put on his body armor, and got his weaponry- an AK-47 assault rifle and a Colt Anaconda revolver. Gaz peeked in while he was doing that.
"Oh, and by the way, I heard that Sam Fisher's out gathering intel. We might end up crossing paths with him somewhere along the line." Gaz said.
"Okay, cool." Dib said, and then he did a double-take. "Wait... THE Sam Fisher? The one who stopped a war between North Korea and the USA?"
"Yes, 'the' Sam Fisher." Gaz replied.
"This is going to be fucking great. I finally get to meet one of my idols." Dib's eyes were beginning to bulge.