CHAPTER TWO
I'm an atom in a sea of nothing
Looking for another to combine,
Maybe we could be the start of something
Be together at the start of time..
After we finish I drift into a light slumber before he rouses me from sleep and we do it again from the side. I learn a lot. I learn to await our coming with excitement as well as dread. I learn the treachery of my own flesh, and am shocked by the frailty of my control and my inability to separate the physical from the emotional. He teaches me that pain can be a part of pleasure, and that pleasure can be apart of pain. And when I shudder to a mind-blowing orgasm and struggle to compose myself I feel the tears smatter my eyelashes, because I have been waylaid from my set path and now have new fears. I quiver audibly at the drugging rule he is able to exert over my body, and the growing familiarity that has emerged between us. I quiver because despite how hard I've tried to keep vigilance over my emotions and hood my senses to him there's still an insatiable void that only he can fill. But most of all I quiver because it was just supposed to be this one night, and I know that its not nearly enough… I'm fucking sprung and now there's no turning back. Emotional roller-coaster here I come you bitch.
My head is pounding, and my mouth is bone dry when I first stir. My legs are on fire, I'm sore, and there's a smarting pain that seeps through me but I still vaguely register the warm imprisoning weight that shrouds me in it's honeyed heat and for a few moments it becomes my whole world. I luxuriate in the scent of him and his warm silken weight as my body slackens into lassitude and I lay listening to his quiet breathing.
I can hear his heart it beats steady and strong. In bitter wonderment I realize that no girl has ever-even came close to claiming this from him. His head is pillowed on my hair, trapping me even in sleep and its just so fitting to our situation. He has me right where he wants me while he couldn't be further detached from it all. I sigh my frustration.
I need to get up, and go home before my parents wake up and figure out how I spent my night.
I make an awkward show of detangling us, as I silently try not waking him. And when we're finally apart the relative isolation hits me immediately, and I resist the urge to burrow back into him.
Because I really need to get my ass home like now! Jeremy wakes up super early, and the little shit wouldn't hesitate to trick on me.
I shift rigidly onto my side and will myself to open my eyes. Bad move. The glare of the sun is relentless as it floods into the room, soaking up every square inch of it in its torrid grasp and its just downright unbearable. My stomach recoils violently on a heave and I have to swallow to suppress the bile as I struggle into a sitting position.
I try to orient myself in the present, but the bittersweet memories of last night and alcohol pervade my senses, soaking me in its remorseless debauchery. I can literally taste my need, its pungent and tangible and it swells just beneath the surface begging for a reprieve as it's slowly crests and I mentally peel back last night layer by layer. The exertion solidifies my headache and I can feel my muscles bunch and ache as I reach over to grasp a bottle of pills that sits on the end table nearby.
Thank god for aspirin. I'm like a junkie in need of a fix, as I eagerly pop off the lid and shake the pills into my hand.
I fumble to the floor; check my phone and head to the bathroom with items I've managed to scoop up as I try to dispel the nausea. My breathing is shaky, and my skin clammy, as I start a winding path down the hall I know so well. I'm met with a slew of framed pictures and family knickknacks that whir past me as I rush headlong into the bathroom. I've barely clicked on the light before I'm curved under the sink and sluicing water down my face. I stay under the cold spray for a few minutes, and pop the drugs fiendishly with a gulping swallow. When I finally start to feel better I dry my face, finger comb my hair, and head back into the living room.
Suddenly fear chokes in my throat, and I have to remember to breathe as I study him sitting on the couch, idly reclining in a diagonal position with his head propped up. Almost as if he can sense my presence, his head turns and our eyes connect and hold, his brilliant and intent, mines dark and cowering.
My stomach cramps and convulses in inexplicable panic, and a nervous energy purrs me through me as I try to formalize words. I draw a blank though, and swallow convulsively when he starts to stalk towards me. My mouth opens and parts but no sound comes and I pray for the power of flight.
I'm fucking terrified. I'm no longer the cool uninhibited girl from last night who can drink like a fish, and verbally spar with the best of them. Instead I'm 16 yr. old Elena, his sisters ex best friend, gangly and uncoordinated and I can't help but feel every bit of my age as I shiver uncontrollably.
Then he moves closer, the light catches him, and I see his sensual mouth curve into a smile of pure satisfaction. It's predatory and feral and I just know I'm about to be eaten alive.
His presence seems to drain all the strength from me and I lean against the cold hard wall for support. I turn away and try to avoid his relentless stare as my chest rises and falls in jerky breaths. I feel suffocated, overwhelmed in his presence, and unable to frame a word of intelligible thought.
When I feel him hover above me, and his arms crowd me in I flinch reflexively. But when his hand catches me by the scruff of my neck and drives my head up I unwarily look straight into his eyes despite the quivering fear. Their darker, so dark that their almost unfathomable, and impossibly, horrifyingly beautiful in his fair face. Then I watch as a familiar light begins to grow in them and the darkness is swallowed up in a brilliance that makes them blaze. They spark, so hot and contagious that its heat floods through me and I moan my need softly.
His hand tightens on my neck and his eyes gleam possessively before he runs an idle thumb over my lip and stares at my mouth.
"No running. Remember?" He's says with such stark desperation that I can't help but wonder if it's a loaded phrase.
"I can't."
In answer he bends me back with a strength that makes me shiver so violently, I long to succumb to it. His kiss is rough, and as demanding as last night—then his hold eases and grips my chin up, his watchful eyes pinned to my face with a silent authority.
"No running" He orders gruffly as his finger caresses my lip, softly, reverently.
"No running" I whisper in acquiescence and dart my tongue out to lick his finger and he grunts his approval and brings my body up flush against his and hoists me up against the wall. My legs wrap around him tightly, I catch my breath, and the room, the house, and the whole city, is suddenly breathless with waiting.
His lips are soft when they finally come, nibbling and nuzzling as they tug on my ear. A bolt of desire, sharp as a knife, stabs through my vitals and I rasp for breath as I latch onto him.
"Mine. Mine. Mine" He says after he kisses my forehead, cheek, and jaw.
"Yours.."
"Damn right and you don't you forget it" His voice is warm as it hums in my ear, interspersed with soft moist kisses that rob me of my breath and curl my toes.
His tongue swirls hot in my ear, as he nibbles my lobe, making me groan, and drugging me into a sweet surrender. I forget where I am. Everything around me recedes, until there is only his whisper, his touch, and his tender aching kisses. After an eternity of intoxication and mad desire his fingers bracket around my mouth, and finally, mercifully touch his lips to mine. I sob with relief and hunger as I clutch him wildly, my shaky arms wrapping around his neck, plundering his mouth and drinking in his scent, as I taste him, sweet as sin. He plunges his tongue into my mouth, seeking me, finding me. We thrust and parry, a feverous blend of lips, tongue, and mouth, matched only by our hips, grind and rock together.
We soft, we gentle, and peak all over again in a zealous haze of soft whispers, and tender caresses, completely lost in this feeling and in each other as we glide towards a parallel universe that only we exist.
It's me who finally breaks the kiss when my phone buzzes loudly and jarringly into the room. I shakily pull away with a laugh, and try to ignore the skip of my heart as I pray that it's not my parents.
It's Jeremy.
I'm contemplative on whether or not to answer it as I stare at the name for a few petrifying seconds. Finally I will myself to answer it and take a deep breath.
"You are so dead, once mom and dad finds out" He laughs.
"Are they up?"
"Nope, but its only a matter of time dumb ass"
"Fuck you" I hiss spitefully "And you better stall them if they do or else I'm blowing the lid on your little sock drawer"
"You're such a bitch"
"And you're a pain in the ass, I'm on my way " I hang up the phone and untangle myself from Damon, too embarrassed to look up at him as I scavenge my things in a frenzied rush.
"I'll walk you out," He says, and I don't have time to dissect it because I'm too busy running towards the door.
The warm air strikes my face immediately as I amble out into the sultry heat, hobbling on one foot and trying to shove the other into my shoe. I look ridiculous, and an acute embarrassment settles over me as I silently pray Damon's not watching me look just like the little kid he's always thought of me as.
To make things even better, I'm sweating already and I can't help but swipe at the beads of perspiration with the back of my hand as I turn to him with a sheepish grin.
He's shirtless, and beautiful as the baking rays filter across his tousled brown hair and aquamarine eyes. And suddenly I have no clue what to say or do. There's no post coital handbook to help me out, or latent knowledge that rushes to the surface as I stare lost, and dumfounded.
Does this sort of situation warrant a goodbye? Do we kiss, do we hug? I'm rooted to the spot like a dumb bitch, and all I can do is stare haplessly.
He moves towards me, and I almost sob my relief as I watch him stop in front of me. My heart hammers, and I inch towards him in anticipation, desperate for respite.
He tilts my chin up in that way I'm starting to love, and we stare at each other for a few halting seconds, oblivious of time. A bumbling smile breaks across my lips, and giddiness sweeps through me as I bite down on my lip and lean into the kiss.
It's sweet, and short but the way he wraps his arms around me and squeezes ever so slightly is enough to tide me over.
"Later Gilbert" He whispers against the shell of my ear, and I tremble at the contact before pulling away.
"Later" I smile way too fucking widely, and happily, but I can't help myself, I'm already too far-gone.
I turn around reluctantly, and try to drown out the disharmony of my heels clicking against the pavement as I relive our kiss and smile broadly.
And when I get into my car and gun up the brash engine, I don't stop staring back at him until he ebbs into nothing but a little dot that I can no longer see, and a car honks.
I know its short but i'm hooked on these two, and needed to write something
BTW I can't fucking wait till all my favorite tv shows come back. Best time of the year for TV! :)