Missing Pieces
What happens between Mako and Raleigh's first drift and when they're fighting strong together later on… Missing pieces from the story in between.
[2] Second Drift
The Second Drift was easier, it always was.
But in the half light from the monitors in the darkened lab, as Mako pressed the button to initiate it, their eyes met in the darkness and Raleigh couldn't help but remember the second time with Yancy…
It'd been so different, but it had been a different time. Back then first drifts were short, heavily monitored, closely guarded. There had been so many failures that onlookers were kept away until they were sure. But after a modicum of certainty had been established the went for it – press, world leaders, scientists, family… so many to witness the successful second drift, evidence made real of the Jaeger program moving forward with prime candidates. It was all brightness and cameras and emotion and confusion, bright lights and flash bulbs, like performing bears, surfing each other's most intimate memories while the world watched…
Not like this… After the near total failure the first time in front of so many, this time was just the opposite… Somewhat appropriate considering the whole Jaeger program had gone ass-backwards. This was secret, dead of night, crouched on the ground of an empty lab, hidden in the back of the room lit only by the blue-grey light of the drift monitors turned away from the glass… Anyone passing by would only think that some experiment was running alone overnight.
The button rested in Mako's lap, her slender fingers holding it above the rough fabric of her cargos. Raleigh sat across from her, both crossed-legged on the floor.
As the drift initiates the monitors spring to life and they stiffen in unison, eyes involuntarily snapping shut, quiet gasps escaping their lips, recent memories cycling by in quick succession…
…The tap on his bedroom door had been so quiet, he'd almost thought he'd imagined it, but he got up anyways, and here she was. Her eyes, determined, met his, and she glanced around at the empty corridor before whispering, "I want to try again, please come with me." She hadn't even waited for an answer before turning to walk away. Not like he'd hesitated, he just grabbed a shirt and followed, pulling it over his head and he walked, bare feet silent on the cool metal of the hall…
Then deeper memories, emotions, quickly, too fast to process, and he didn't try, that's why it's called 'drifting', the whole idea is to float, directionless, above the stream of consciousness… immersed but not grasping.
She was better this time, more controlled, less chaotic, but she fought it, holding too tightly to the last time, seeking too much to control, making the exchange uncomfortable, like his thoughts were pushing in forcefully and hers were begrudgingly feeding out.
Raleigh forced his eyes open.
Slowly he lifted his hands, and placed them on Mako's shoulder, gently, but still applying pressure, resting his thumbs on the sides of her neck, fingers splayed towards her back. "Mako…" he breathed, more thinking it than speaking, "Relax."
Her shoulders tensed at the touch, but her memories and thoughts opened slightly: he caught a glimpse of a younger looking Pentecost, resting his hand gently on her head when she was young… the memory paired in feeling with a remembered bear hug from Raleigh's brother before both faded back in to the mix.
Mako took a deep breath, forcing her shoulders down… Raleigh smiled, "Good, good," flicking a glance at the monitors… the sync was almost settled… …but they'd made it this far before…
He instantly felt horrible for thinking that, but as he turned back to face her, Mako opened her eyes and lifted a hand to rest over his at her neck. "Not your fault, remember?" She grasped his wrist and pulled his hand down, he slowly lowered the other.
The monitor blinked and they both turned to look.
"Sync Complete."
For a moment they just sat there, drifting above the link, not focusing, but letting thoughts and memories pass, learning the feel of the link, but not forcing it, and for a time it seemed to work. Mako nodded to herself, and reached down to the shut off button, looking up at Raleigh as she did so. An uncharacteristic smirk crossed her features, and she grinned openly up at him, awash in their success…
And that was it. This time it as his fault, no debate.
The emotion, the mix of pride, self-confidence, but also a bit of cocky satisfaction, instantly it paired with the other memory and he was there… Linked to Yancy, Gypsy cradling the boat between her fingers, he could feel… Everything… the older model suit, the press of the helmet into his cheeks, the smell of the cockpit, the feel of the system, and the drift link…
Oh God, the link…
He could Feel, Yancy. Right there, present… They'd done it, screw the orders, one kaiju down and civilians saved, and flashing under that momentary pride were glimpses of memories, of all their other victories… not enough to disturb the drift, but a mix of greatness a thousand times better than any praise could muster…
Part of him knew what was coming, part of him ebbed dread, part of him was Mako, frantically trying to break free of the memory and finish the motion her hand had started towards the button…
The proximity alarm rang out and they hesitated, glancing at each other before looking forward, watching as the monster's form sprang from the black water, spray flying… In seconds it was on top of them. And then….
Black. Silence…
He couldn't breathe, shaking, the memory cut off so sharply, for a moment he couldn't remember where he was… Panic coursing through his frame, he gasped in a breath… and opened his eyes.
As they adjusted to the dim, floor tiles came in to view… he couldn't stop shaking. He could feel small hands pulling the connections off his head, see the drift unit cords settle before him on the floor… His breath came in gasps, loud in the quiet of the room, and tears fell from his face, making tiny puddles on the floor as Mako unhooked the connections and stood to place the unit back on the table.
Raleigh saw her knees come in to view as she knelt in front of him, silent, respectfully keeping her distance as he grieved.
But compatible is not identical.
Mako had been raised to suffer with honour, as an individual, in private… But Raleigh, and his brother… they had always suffered as one… At this thought his body shakes, racked by another fit of quiet sobs. He shakes his head to himself ruefully, preparing to do what he needs to calm down, but knowing that Mako might object…
He reaches forward, long arms easily reaching her small waist, and he pulls, gently but urgently, sliding her towards him, and, once within reach he falls… desperately embracing her, debris in a storm, head falling nearly to her lap as he tightens his grip around her stomach.
Mako tightens, surprised, but they'd just drifted, she knows his pain, and she adapts quickly, startled hands lowering to his back, one burying itself in his hair, slowly tracing patterns into his scalp as he cries in the shadows from the monitors above.
a/n: Thanks for reading, might continue if inspiration strikes, but just had to get this down.