Autumn, 1797
Three months on a ship accustomed one to the ocean so much that land felt foreign when one finally returned. The voyage had been so long that Angelica felt lightheaded when she first stepped off the ship and into the port.
"Shall we go up to your parents now?" John asked as they walked through the harbour.
During the journey, Angelica had suggested to her husband that they stay at the Pastures until they were able to find a home of their own, and John had readily agreed. Despite his wealth, they would both be starting over in New York. Especially at the very beginning.
Angelica wondered if this was at all like how Alexander felt when he arrived from the Caribbean all those years ago.
"No," she replied, shaking her head. "I need to see Eliza first."
"Fair enough," he conceded. "Do you know where she lives now?"
She didn't actually, but she didn't feel the need to tell John. She doubted it would be hard to find her sister and brother-in-law's house, but more than that, she knew she had to do this on her own.
"Well, what would have me do then?" he asked, after she told him.
She felt bad about all but abandoning her husband as soon as they'd arrived, and she probably should have mentioned her plan to him before they had docked, but it was too late now. Seeing Eliza was her first priority. John would need to find his own way there.
"You can go up if you wish," she told him. She knew he knew enough about her childhood home to be able to find it. "I'll be fine to find my way later."
John didn't say anything.
"Please?"
He nodded, resigned, and left her to walk off to find her sister.
Angelica tried to keep a lid on her anger as she walked through the city in search of Eliza's house.
She had not been able to read the pamphlet in its entirety in London, but eventually she had forced herself to. She needed to know the extent of the damage Alexander had done.
I had frequent meetings with her, most of them at my own house; Mrs. Hamilton with our children being absent on a visit to her father.
It had started then. Of course it did. She had begged him to take a break; Eliza had too. He hadn't listened. Getting that plan through Congress was more important. His work was more important than his family.
It always had been.
She could hardly believe this was Alexander – her dearest Alexander.
And yet it made complete sense. She had always known he would never be satisfied; no matter what happened in his life, it would not be enough. And she had told her sister he would do whatever it took to survive.
Perhaps the most horrifying part of all was the inclusion of so many letters – all with atrocious spelling and grammar – from who could only be the mistress.
He hadn't just announced it to the world; he'd provided tangible evidence of the affair, so nobody could refute him now.
As she had anticipated, the house was not at all difficult to locate. As stated in the pamphlet's egotistic and ostentatious title, Alexander had been the Treasury Secretary. He was famous – or infamous, depending on whom you were talking to –so his address was common enough knowledge with the city's residents.
She knocked on the door with a mixture of trepidation and insistence. If Eliza answered the door the last thing Angelica wanted to do was scare her, but she needed to see her.
If her brother-in-law let her in, she needed him to know she was not about to let this go and forgive him just like that.
Maybe she wouldn't ever be able to forgive him. She knew that would be up to her sister. If Eliza found it in her heart to forgive Alexander one day, she would too.
It was Alexander who opened the door. He didn't say anything as he stepped aside to let her pass. He did not even seem to show any reaction at all. Angelica didn't let her eyes linger for longer than a second, before looking away, trying to find Eliza.
"She's not here," he said tonelessly.
It was only then she realised how quiet it was.
How could she not have predicted this? Of course Eliza would leave, taking the children along with her.
The last time she'd seen her sister had been six years earlier, when they all travelled up to the Pastures for the summer.
All of them bar Alexander.
The summer it all started.
And no one knew.
"They're up at my parents?" she asked, even though she knew it was a moot point.
Alexander nodded. Just as Angelica hadn't looked at him, he wouldn't meet her eyes.
She turned around. Her work here was done, and she couldn't be around her brother-in-law a moment longer.
He had ruined his life, to the point that no one could possibly imagine what it would be like from here on. Even Angelica did not know what the future would hold for her sister and her family.
But whatever it was, Alexander would have to live with the ramifications for the rest of his days.
She knew he wanted her to say something. Anything. And she would. In time. But her sister was the most important thing right now. And she didn't feel like giving her brother-in-law the satisfaction.
So, as she made her way down the steps and back towards the street, she could only say one thing:
"Alexander," she called over her shoulder. "Congratulations."
"John!" she called out.
She had crossed back past the harbour after leaving Alexander. It had taken not even five minutes, and she suspected her husband would still be close by.
She was right. He had not gone far. In point of fact he hadn't moved at all. Had he been waiting for her, despite what she said?
"What is it?"
"She's already at the Pastures," explained Angelica.
"Can we get there before its dark?" he asked.
She nodded, and followed her husband as they sought out a carriage.
As it happened, Cornelia was in the foyer when the butler answered the door.
Angelica hadn't seen her little sister in years – the last time she saw any of her family had been that now-infamous summer. No longer did she look like a girl, as she had at fifteen, but a young woman. A very beautiful one at that.
"Angelica!" she cried. "What are you doing here?" she asked, making her way over to Angelica. With a grin, she gathered her sister into her arms.
She seemed astonished, but also as though she knew it would inevitably come to this. Angelica supposed, since Eliza was currently staying up here, it really wasn't a surprise if one actually thought on it.
"I came to see -" Angelica began, only to be cut off.
"Cornelia?" a voice asked. "What's going on out there? Are you –"
Catherine Van Rensselaer broke off at the sight of her eldest daughter in the foyer.
"Angelica?" she blinked.
Angelica broke out of her sister's embrace and turned to face her mother. "Mama," she smiled, somewhat sheepish.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, parroting the words her daughter had asked Angelica mere moments ago.
"I came to make sure Eliza's alright."
Her mother's face softened. "You're a wonderful sister," she sighed.
Before Angelica could say anything more, her mother turned to her son-in-law.
"This must be your husband."
John bent over and kissed her hand. Angelica could've sworn her mother blushed a little.
"It's an honour to meet you," he said. "Your daughter is a remarkable woman."
Angelica smiled. He really was so kind; and she had never noticed. She needed to tell him how much it meant to her; that he came over to New York with her, how thoughtful he'd been during their marriage…
But there were more pressing issues.
"Where is she?"
"In her room." said her sister; and before anyone could say anything further, she was racing up the staircase as fast as she could.
"Eliza?" Angelica knocked softly on the door to her sister's room.
There was no sound from inside. She opened the door a fraction and peered inside. Her sister was sitting at the window-seat, staring out over the fields of the property. But Angelica knew she wasn't really looking.
"Betsey?" she said gently.
After a long, silent moment, her sister finally turned around to look at her. There were no tears in her eyes, only resignation.
"I didn't know you were coming," she whispered.
"I came to make sure you're alright," Angelica replied.
"You know?"
Angelica nodded sombrely. She walked into the room towards the window seat and sat down next to her sister. Eliza all but collapsed onto her shoulder. Whether it was her arrival that finally made her sister break or not, Angelica was devastated.
Alexander's actions meant nothing to Angelica without Eliza's reaction. Finally seeing her sister made everything real.
"You came as soon as you heard, didn't you?" asked Eliza.
"Yes," Angelica nodded. "And I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying here in New York with you."
"You are?" she gasped. "Why would you do -"
"To help you."
"I loved him," Eliza sobbed, then paused. "I love him. I do, but I don't know who he is anymore."
Her beautiful sister still loved Alexander Hamilton. Little Betsey, as forgiving as she was kind and trusting.
Trusting this scoundrel had got her in this position.
"He's an Icarus," Angelica said sadly. "And he's flown too close to the sun."
"It was our lives," Eliza screamed. "Our private, personal lives."
Angelica sighed. "Unfortunately, people always want to look into private affairs. They'll always make the personal political. Especially where people like Alexander are concerned."
"But why did he…?"
For that Angelica had no answer. None was needed.
"I knew women loved him," Eliza sniffled. "What did they call him? Little Lion?"
Angelica nodded slowly. That sounded familiar. Little Lion, the tomcat… he'd always been charismatic. His charms had fooled her, and now everyone was suffering.
Even Alexander. As much as she wanted to push her brother-in-law out of her mind, she had seen how hurt he'd been when she had called on him earlier in the day.
"I could see how he charmed them and, well, I can understand why," Eliza continued, breaking her sister's reverie. She sounded the tiniest bit less miserable.
But that didn't last and her brief moment of levity only made her more upset.
"But I never imagined…"
Angelica's heart broke hearing the pain in her sister's voice.
How badly had Alexander hurt her?
If you've read some of my other Hamilton fics you'll know I included the rest of the Schuyler siblings, and this story is the same. There have also be a few liberties taken with the other children, but you'll meet them in the next chapter.
Have a great day.