Scars by Papa Roach.
Scars Part Two.
And our scars remind us that the past is real. I tear my heart open just to feel.
Only Human - The 150th Hunger Games.
Saskia Rossum, District Twelve Victor.
"It's just not safe," Crispin warns, standing at the door. "I won't be long. I'll be back before you know it."
"You and I both know that won't be true," I whisper. No-one is safe anymore.
Crispin sighs. "Saskia, it's... it's just not safe for you."
"I have to go, though. I have to... for the others..." I lie.
Unlike the other districts, we wasn't hit that hard with the deaths. Crispin's never been particularly close to anyone, choosing to stay by himself. The only person I really interact with is Pippin, and that's why I need to go. Once upon a time, he saved me from myself, from my mind. This is my chance to be there for him.
"Please," I whisper again. "Crispin... I have to."
Crispin's face falters. "Is this about Pippin?"
"I owe him," I quickly answer, voice too high. "He's probably torn apart and... and he saved me many, many years ago, and I... I have to be there for him...!"
My words seem to strike a chord in Crispin. Slowly but surely, his strength crumbles and he concedes. "But you stay by me. It might get dangerous. We don't even know what will happen."
I nod curtly. I don't know what will happen, but I need to risk it. If not for Pippin, then for myself. We can make a difference. Together, united.
I can't hide myself away forever.
The car whisks me and Crispin through District Twelve, straight to the train station. Being a Victor, we have instant access to the Capitol when we like. We don't even need a reason. Crispin talks quietly to the man at the platform, and silently, we board the very last carriage.
The journey flies by, trees blurring under the muted moonlight.
I lean against the cool glass. Each time I think about what happened, my chest bursts into butterflies, making me sick and dizzy. It was so cruel, so barbaric. One by one, she hung them. Their bodies just dropped and their necks snapped and... and I just watched the screen silently, as Crispin paced the room like a caged animal desperate to escape.
And that's when he mentioned about the rebellion. The one that nobody involved me in, because really, what use am I?
Amity, Zeke, Lorcan, Maple, Chiffon, Mako... they were all apart of it, or at least involved. It didn't take long for Crispin to spill the words out of fear. Apparently, only Mako wasn't involved, and Crispin assumed it was to spare Gypsy.
I didn't understand it, at first. I was confused and I was crying and nothing made sense. Then, it slowly peeled apart, and I realised that Crispin's fear was because of us, because of his involvement. And I just knew from then that I had to, as well.
I had to.
The train grinds to a halt.
"We're here," Crispin mumbles, rising. He pushes the door open and checks the area, before stepping out of the carriage. I wait until he says my name, before I follow him. Down the quiet streets of the Capitol, Crispin leads me to an apartment block, one that towers over the buildings surrounding it. The moon glows eerily across the street.
We climb up the steps in silence. My heart races in my chest. Each step makes me feel sick and scared, but I move forward, digging for the fire that I know I have. Crispin pauses, and taps a door three times.
"Crispin," Nicolet Aryth's voice beckons from the other side of the door. As it opens, her mouth falls open. "And Saskia. Wow. I didn't think you had it in you."
"She insisted," Crispin smiles faintly.
"We need all the help we can get," Nicolet replies, stepping aside. "Come on in, we're having a right party in here."
Inside the room, my heart flutters, my steps quiet as I fall behind Crispin's more stern ones. That's when I notice who is there, who is actually present, who is a member of the hidden rebellion.
My eyes find Pippin first, mournful eyes locked on the floor and never looking up. Darek is by his side, silent, and Topher is on the other side, muttering quietly as Nicolet takes her seat once more. Aston is there, too, staring at the paper in the middle of the room, torn between crying and screaming, it seems.
My heart races even more. Without knowing it, I slip my hand into Crispin's, and he leads me into a seat on the side. Ellery glances in my direction. "Oh," she mouths.
I stare at her with wide eyes. "Pardon?"
"I said oh," Ellery confirms. "Nobody expected you two to arrive."
"Well, we did," Crispin frowns, falling next to me. Past Ellery is Arjan, sadly smiling at the group, as if he doesn't know what to say or do. Serena is lost in thought, whispering to herself, whilst Gypsy has her arms crossed, counting aloud.
On the outskirts, though, is the most surprising of all. Carnelian, Aphrodite, Ajax and Gemini are grouped together, talking amongst themselves. It's almost like they expected to be isolated by everyone else.
Darek steps forward. In the light, you can see the bright bruise that covers nearly half of his face. "I see everyone is here," he begins quietly, voice hushed.
Nobody answers him.
"I... I have no idea what to say or do," Darek admits, smiling sadly. "...Chiffon was always my answer to everything..."
Pippin looks up. Those bright, shiny eyes of his meets mine, and he smiles sadly. I instantly smile back, fighting the urge to sweep across the room and embrace him. All those years ago, he never realised how much he helped. That little bit of information basically saved me from the brink of suicide. He doesn't know it, but I owe him everything.
"I'll fucking kill her!" Spruce's voice booms across the room. That's when I notice him, on his own, submerged in the shadows of the room. "I'll strange her with my bare hands!"
"Let's not get overemotional over this," Ellery cuts in, rather cold.
"What are you even doing here?" Spruce spits. "You're as bad as her!"
"She killed Zeke," Ellery snarls. "I have every right to be here as you do, moron..."
Arjan steps forward. "Let's not argue..."
"No, this is good," Nicolet nods. "If we get angry, maybe we can actually do something that'll avenge their deaths. Our plan has basically fallen apart now, seeing as they know."
"We don't know that," Darek frowns. "We... we don't know that they know."
"They were executed on grounds on terrorism. I think they know about us," Crispin's wavering voice joins the lines. I sink deeper and deeper into my chair. Maybe I was wrong, maybe this wasn't for me.
Darek turns to the Careers. "Did Amity... did she get arrested on the same grounds?"
"Yeah," Ajax answers quietly. "They only went for her, though, and not me."
"See? That doesn't mean they really know," Darek smiles sadly. "We still have a chance. I mean, if they didn't arrest us all, then maybe there's hope? Why would they just pick six of us, when there's all of us that can carry it on?"
"Maybe it was to weaken us, you know, like kill our spirits and hopes? Esmeralda loves to do that," Topher suggests.
"Or she's playing one of her fantastic fucking games," Ellery snorts.
"We can't let it get to us," Arjan steps forward, a voice of reason once more. "We need to show them that... that although we're sad, it doesn't stop us. We have a chance to save the future generation. We have to take it!"
Nicolet rises from her seat. "Arjan is right! We have the chance here, and I doubt that Amity, Chiffon, Zeke, Lorcan, Maple or Mako would want us to waste it, right?"
Darek nods along and steps towards the paper. "Precisely. We... we know that she has a month left to live, and when she dies, Nicolet has mentioned that Theodore is taking over?"
"Yeah, he mentioned it to me," Nicolet nods. "Yes, he's been my source. You'd be surprised about how much he hates his Mother," she laughs lightly. "But yeah. He's taking over. He doesn't know it yet, but we have to strike when she dies, whilst he's at his weakest."
"Seems cruel," I whisper.
"Seems fair," Ellery points out. "She murders children, and he's an extension of her eggs, so why doesn't he get the same punishment?"
"So we agree, we strike just after she dies?"
Sadly, we have to wait until the Quell is over, and even then, we have mentoring duties. I sit up slightly. "What... what about mentoring?" I ask quietly, and it's like everyone falls silent, staring at me, eyes trying to bore into my skull.
"We're the mentors then," Darek points out. "It gives us a reason to be in the Capitol, right? We'll get past the security guards easily then. So, we all mentor, okay? And, if everything goes well, we'll stop the Hunger Games for good. For the future generation. For the deceased. For the mentors we've loved and lost that gave their lives to ensure we make a difference."
No-one argues with that. It's a guaranteed for some of us to always mentor. I sink back into my seat, feeling the comfort in being unnoticed. Even across the room, Pippin is absorbed in his own sadness, and whilst I thought I could save him, I don't know if I'm truly what he needs at the moment. When Darek places that hand back on his shoulder, Pippin looks at him with such love and need, I can't help but smile: Pippin deserves a little happiness.
I rise abruptly. "We can do it," I smile at everyone in the room. It's like a weight is lifted from my chest and I can breathe - truly breathe - for the first time in years. Tears prick at my eyes but I blink them away. "We'll do it." I whisper.
"Yeah, okay, sit back down now," Ellery rolls her eyes.
Spruce, however, abruptly stands and leaves, his hunched frame slamming the door. It doesn't deter the brief happiness that everyone has. For our deceased friends, for the ones that we called mentors and family, we won't be sad.
On the train home, Crispin is still nervous, timid against the window.
"We'll be okay," I say, a reversal of how the roles used to be, him saying comforting words to me. "The plan... it'll work... it has to."
"Nothing is set in stone," Crispin smiles sadly.
"But we have to at least try,"
"I know..."
I let out a shaky sigh. "If we die trying to make a difference, then isn't it worth it?"
Crispin smiles sadly. "I thought that too... at first."
"But... but you joined the rebellion..."
"To spare you," Crispin laughs dryly.
"...I don't always need protecting," I try and sound strong, but it ends up squeaky, betraying my nerves. I don't think I'll ever be okay alone. Crispin is slowly getting older. If he dies, I... I don't know what I'll do, all alone.
Crispin straightens his back. "You're right. You don't always need protecting. You may not realise it yet, but you've grown, Saskia. You might feel scared and alone, but you've blossomed into someone who takes risks and actions. I... I just needed to try and save you."
"Why?" I frown.
"Because you're the only tribute I've ever saved," Crispin laughs, a tear sliding down his cheek. "I've watched dozens die. Some hopeless, some extraordinary. But you... you won, and saved me from being alone and not feel so worthless, and I wanted to ensure that you never feel like that... if the rebellion worked, well, you wouldn't have to go through what I did all those years..."
"Crispin..."
"I'm dying, Saskia," Crispin smiles sadly. "I don't have long... I never wanted to tell you, but I couldn't bring myself to do nothing... so when Darek asked me, I joined the rebellion in your place, knowing that I'll die eventually, and with that, I can spare many children from dying and I can also save you from a life of isolation... I've never been good at anything else. With this, I could finally do something worthwhile."
I realise I'm crying, reflected in Crispin's sad laugh. I wipe away at the tears, feeling the hole grow within my chest. It's like my whole world is both crashing and rising at the same time, and I don't know which way I want it to fall.
"Thank you..." I whisper.
"Don't thank me yet," Crispin squeezes my hand across the table. "We still have a long way to go."
That brings a smile to my face. "For the future."
Crispin laughs. "For the future."
Expect the reapings between seven-ten days, and hopefully, one update a week should go to plan to get through pre-Games a lot quicker! Whichever day I update will be the weekly date.
Here, however, are your wonderful tributes for this story and underneath, information and such, like the blog and everything.
List Of Tributes.
District One - Luxury.
Male: Clarent Tarbeck, 18.
Female: Cadence Halsey, 18.
District Two - Masonry.
Male: Ares Baskaus, 18.
Female: Kaitlin Garrett, 16.
District Three - Technology.
Male: Lanuel Nox, 17.
Female: Farryn Lore, 15.
District Four - Fishing.
Male: Douglas Orsett, 18.
Female: Evangeline Marlowe, 17.
District Five - Power.
Male: Jayce Kenton, 18.
Female: Arden Novelle, 16.
District Six - Transportation.
Male: Vectus Perrault, 18.
Female: Inari Wilder, 17.
District Seven - Lumber.
Male: Keaton Malloy, 18.
Female: Astrid Caverly, 16.
District Eight - Textiles.
Male: Soren Chandtara, 16.
Female: Valera Saffel, 17.
District Nine - Grain.
Male: Silas Torrell, 15.
Female: Enora Ardley, 18.
District Ten - Livestock.
Male: Daithi Sheahan, 15.
Female: Zora Hudgens, 14.
District Eleven - Agriculture.
Male: Levitt Tithe, 18.
Female: Asha Mazuike, 17.
District Twelve - Coal.
Male: Nicholas Carson, 17.
Female: Avril Benton, 18.
The blog for this story is onlyhuman hunger games . blogspot - all deaths will be notified here!
All deaths will be based on realism, story arcs and whether or not the submitter is reading the story. Obviously, reviews let me know this, and if said submitter chooses to not review, I have no idea if they're reading the story, and therefore, am more inclined to keep other tributes over said submitter's tribute. Each decision is painstakingly hard but must be done. Everyone knew the odds when they created a character. I would hope you stick around, but if not, I understand.
I would love for you to answer a specific question I have for each chapter!
Who are your favourite tributes from just a simple, first impression look at the blog? As in biased, judged impressions?
And, of course, a general review on my writing? It's invaluable!
When you look at this list, you'll realise that your tribute probably had their age altered. It was nothing personal. When I made the list, I realised that I only had two tributes under sixteen-years-old, and my insides just went crazy. So, I moved some around. Nothing major. I just didn't tell anyone because it was too late. Same with pictures, but I would've told you that...
Anywaaay. If your tribute isn't up there, then unfortunately, they didn't make it. Nothing personal. No hard feelings. With sixty submissions, I had a lot handed to me, and a lot had to be turned away. I'll begin the apologetic messages shortly.
Besides all that, welcome to Only Human!