Fuuuuuuuuck... I don't even...
Dave: This is the unironic sequel to "The Rise of the Guardians Fanfiction Debate."
HOLY SHI-WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?!
Dave: I've always been here. Ironically.
No, NO, WE ARE NOT DOING THIS BRO! This isn't even your fandom. Seriously, what the hell?
Dave: *shrug* I have no fucking idea. You can't outrun what's already here.
OHMYGOG, NO. Just-just no more HS based jokes.
Dave: *shrug X2 COMBO AND I THOUGHT WE WEREN'T DOING THIS. (THIS IS STUPID.)* Fine whatever.
Just do the damn disclaimer already. And without a rap.
Dave: 'Kay. Leah here doesn't own shit. She does, however, own drugs as this fic was written on crack.
*le sign*
Jack Frost was a rather curious person. But we all know the saying, "Curiosity killed the cat." Which stayed dead and buried, because whoever said that satisfaction brought it back was a dirty, dirty liar. Which was all rather unfortunate for Jack, for he was feeling very curious at the moment.
It was another meeting day and while he loved taking part in games and fun, these meetings were anything but fun. In fact, to be honest, they kind of scared him a little. But that wasn't the point right now, he had something important to do today. Something important that included a certain Bunny and a closet. *hint, hint, nudge, nudge*
Right now, he was playing his cool. Waiting, watching, analyzing. He was a snake, waiting to pounce on his prey which was...
A bunny.
WELL. Metaphors don't get any simpler than that.
First, though, he had to make (or find) a distraction. What to do, what to do... Hmm... There was the OC's with their vast numbers, surely he could cause a stampede... Wait, no, someone could get hurt... Mainly him because that's most likely what they would stampede about... What about Pitch, surely he could... wait, no, what if it was a repeat of the whole BLACK PITCH incident... seriously, how the hell was he suppose to know Pitch would go all emo on him like that?!
Giving a sigh, the winter spirit lazily rolls onto his stomach from his hiding spot under the table. (He really hopes that the thing in the corner is Pitch or some Nightmare because OH MY GOD IT'S LOOKING AT YOU DON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT, DON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT.) Glancing out for beneath his confines (the table had on a table cover that almost reached to the floor), he spotted a tiny pair of shoes with bells on them. He grinned to himself.
This was going to be fun.
Thirty seconds later and with a new partner in crime, Jack sets about to organizing his army. Which is to say, Jack bribed the elves with cookies and the Easter Elf just smiled through the whole thing. Jack swears to this day that he only gave one cookie to each elf. Okay, maybe two. Or three. Or a lot. Or a whole fucking lot. Hey, he didn't just say "screw it" and handed over what he knew to be North's super special secret stash now, did he? Okay, maybe he did but it's not like it matters!
Right?
It takes exactly five minutes for everyone to clear the room. Wow, you didn't know that apparently fruit cake was flammable and that the elves might be slight pyromaniacs when under the influence of sugar. Go figure. You also didn't know that North could run that fast but man, can that Santa book it. Now, though, as the last of the cute but sadly not very helpful OC's straggle out, it's just you and Bunny. Why he stayed behind so long is a mystery but hey, who are you to question the Yaoi Fanfiction Authoress Moons of the Universe? Now's your chance!
...And why the hell has that last paragraph written in second person?
Jack outwardly huffs at this and Bunny sends him a questionable look but he ignores it. Focusing, he uses his staff to let snow fall in the room, helping put out the fire. Bunny gives him a look that asks why he didn't do that before. Jack just shrugs.
"What did you really want with me mate?" Bunny asks. Jack gives a thoughtful look before answering.
"Bunny, get in the closet."
"What?"
"Get in the closet."
"What-no!"
"Get in the closet."
"Moondammit Jack, I just spent the last couple of hours in there hiding from the fangirls, I am not going back in!"
"Get in the closet."
"No, I just came out!"
"Bunny."
"No."
"Bunny please."
"NO Jack."
"Bunny, pretty please. It's for... other stuff."
"Other... stuff?"
"Yeah, other stuff. Like Fanfiction other stuff."
"O-Oh... Are you sure you're ready?"
"As ready as I'll every be so get in the closet already Cottontail!"
"Alright, if you insist."
They both enter the closet and Bunny can tell that Jack is visibly excited. His eyes are glowing and he can't keep that grin off his face, hovering for a bit before walking again and then switching back to hovering. The winter spirit really is excited.
"I can't wait Bunny," Jack says, giving a twirl and a smile.
"You're really eager about this, aren't you?" Bunny asks, not quite believing what he was seeing. Jack liked to put up a fight, make it a competition between the two. Something about this was fishy...
"Yeah, I can't wait to see Narnia!"
"...WHAT?!"
And that the end! I really only made this sequel because when I reread my crack oneshot I was like, "OMG, I PUT A RANDOM CLOSET IN THE ROOM! IT'S NARNIA!" Thus the birth of this fic! XD
Where the hell are we?
This isn't Narnia!
O_O Wut?
You!
You're the authoress lady, aren't you?
O_o WTF?!
Woah, what the bloody-what's wrong with your eyes?!
*snickers* Can you teach me how to do that? I can't wait to try it out on Bunny!
No, no, no, nonononono. You guys aren't even suppose to be here. Fuck.
Yeah, well, we're here now shelia.
Right, what the Bunny said.
...did you really just say that? Oh moon, you're adorable Jack.
Back off, he's mine.
...are you another fangirl that's going to rip my shirt off?
No, I won't. But fuck, I need to send you guys back. You're not suppose to be in the AN?
AN?
(Psst, it stand for Author Note. Don't ask questions, we might send her off on a rant.)
(Oh moon, not another one. I already have Tooth on my back for putting candy in my eggs.)
(Just so you guys know, I can totally read these parenthesis marks that either mean your talking quietly or thinking and fuck, I'm thinking aren't I. Shit.)
Um...
You've been staring for quite a while now...
Sorry, now-
SHIT!
WHO THE FUCK IS IT NOW?!
YO, PAST ME, IS IT TOO LA-OH SHIT.
...
...
...
Welp. This isn't awkward at all. Why the hell is future me wearing a Sylph of Time God Tier costume?
Shit goes down in the future. Or rather, in a future story you been planning on writing in a couple of months. And no, we are not shamelessly plugging right now, it's just advertising.
...riiiiiiiight. Anyways, how do I get rid of these two?
Huh?
Excuse me?
Easy, just snap your fingers. Your the fucking authoress, remember?
Oh yeah... *snap*
Well, now that they're gone, I'm going to try to go back again and stop this conversation from happening.
But it already is...?
Shush, doomed timeline stuff.
Oh.
As the Sylph of Time, I have to "heal" the timeline which is complete bullshit but whatever. Anymore questions before I peace out of here?
Why do we cuss so much?
Best. Fucking. Question. Ever. Because it's fun and a crack fic.
Okay then.
Shameless plug?
Shameless plug. So, I have another RotG Fic called "Dear Future" about Jack's Memories. Yeah, you can go read it. I also have several other fics from several other fandoms you can choose from.
I'm working on a project that involves a second account, which I have set up, that I've already mentioned here. Or am working on, since I'm the Future Leah and stuff.
Anyways, we-or it's really just I, isn't it?-hope to see you soon!
Peace.
(...I have no idea why I wrote this.)
(No fucking idea.)