I left the cafeteria to go to my lovely house where I was lucky enough to find my mother sobbing and my father pacing. Obviously this was my fault.

To give you a better idea of what this actually looks like I will explain. To add to my ever growing list of bad things, I am the exact picture of my mother, fabulous, I know. Every other 16 year old guy is quite jealous. No, I'm lying.

I tried to switch my look by getting side bangs, it gives me an edge...not really but I like them. My hair is black; you'd think I'd dyed it, suspicious, no? I have brown eyes the depth of Micaela Jonson's heart, ya know, the popular girl. I'm thin with no muscle, well some, like my tongue...not that I'm implying anything and the icing on the cake, which I've already mentioned, I look like my mom.

It's hard not to dwell on that but seriously? You'd figure there was a plus to looking like you mom. You'd be graceful or good with words or know how to interact with the human race, ANYTHING. But no, simply a resemblance.

Then, on the other hand you have my father and my older brother, both utterly swoon worthy. I cringe when ever I think of that. Seriously though, 'swoon worthy'; do these girls have nothing better? They are both built rather large, totally muscle (sigh). And of course you can't over look their 'gorgeous' blond locks and 'glowing' blue eyes.

Please, someone please explain to me where I got that and why I actually picked it up! My life is so sad. Oh and you can't leave out the literal the trail of girls behind them. They all laugh when they say he's 'swoon worthy' *cringe* but you'd be surprised at how many actually do.

So, my dad is lecturing me, my mum is crying and my brother is at football practice. A day like so many others. But today I am off to the House of Night, fabulous. Logically I'm being sent to the one I was informed of, a town away.

AHAHAHAHA, no. If you believed that for even a second you haven't actually been following my story.

No, I have 'disgraced' the family, 'embarrassed' them all, I 'asked' for this to happen. "Why yes father dear, of course I did, I didn't find cutting to be a strong enough form of self mutilation so I took up convulsive hacking too." Obviously. (note to you, I don't actually cut myself, that would hurt and the only thing that makes me swoon it blood, no that's a lie...the only thing so far is blood).

Anywho, I'm being shipped to the United States of America, oh the fun I shall have. I will blend in fabulously with my very English accent and my different words and spellings. Good times, good times.

Ok, so this is the next chapter. I know it's pretty short but there is more and it needs to break here. I'm glad/shocked anyone read and liked this story but thanks, it actually means a lot. Hope this meets your expectations. Please review and tell me what you think