It had been a sleepless night for Mal, as his worry for Kaylee had kept him from finding any kind of peace. Since things were only going to get worse after she found out about her family, he had a feeling that there would be many more sleepless nights to come.

It was early now, about an hour before breakfast, but he headed for the engine room knowing that Kaylee would be there. She was, after all, an early riser. As much as he dreaded the task ahead of him, he knew that it was time to tell Kaylee about her family. He realized that it had been wrong to keep her in the dark for this long, but his desire to spare Kaylee from pain had superseded any kind of reasoning.

He entered the engine room and sure enough, Kaylee was already awake and tending to Serenity. "Morning, Cap'n!" she said brightly. "You're just the person that I wanted to see."

"You don't say. Serenity doing alright?" he inquired, welcoming any excuse to avoid doing what he had come there to do.

"Yep." she told him. "It's just that, I noticed we're near Celestia, and I was wonderin', if t'weren't too much trouble, if I could maybe stop by and see my family?"

Mal's face drained of all color at her request. This isn't how he wanted to break it to her that her family was dead.

Kaylee mistook his reaction for a 'no,' and started pleading her case. "I know it's about a day outta the way, but it'd really mean a lot to me, Cap'n. I mean, I haven't seen my family for ages. And you could take the extra gas money out've my pay, I wouldn't mind."

"Oh little Kaylee," he sighed. "I wish we could." His chest tightened as he watched her face fall. It was only going to get worse. Much, much worse.

"But Cap'n… it'd mean so much to me, and I wouldn't ask for nothin' else for a real long time- "

"Kaylee," he cut her off sternly. "We can't see your family." Her eyes got all big and before she could break his heart with more pleas, he decided to tell her the truth. "Kaylee listen to me, okay? There was an attack on Celestia."

If possible her eyes got even bigger at his words. A horrible feeling edged its way into her gut, and she knew whatever was coming next wasn't going to be good. She waited for him to continue and started trembling with fear.

"It was Reavers," he said quietly.

"What… what are you saying, Cap'n?" she asked frantically, backing up away from him, as if she could hide from what she knew was coming. "My family, they're alright, aren't they? Please tell me they're alright."

He looked away from her. He couldn't look her in the eyes as he told her. What a gorram coward he was. "I'm sorry," he said softly.

A cry of anguish escaped Kaylee's lips and she sank to a heap on the floor. Mal got on his knees and gathered the small girl in his arms. Tenderly stroking her hair, he whispered soothingly into her ear. "That's right, mei-mei, you just let it all out," he said tenderly. He held onto her as tightly as he could while she sobbed into his chest.

Seeing Kaylee sad caused Mal more pain than he'd like to admit. He would almost rather be tortured by Niska than be forced to watch Kaylee cry. Her tears just seemed to pierce at him like little daggers. She cried for hours, stopping only after her body went limp with exhaustion. Mal looked down at her and saw that she had cried herself to sleep. Her eyes were so puffy that it looked like they were welded shut.

He remembered something that he had said to Jayne a long time ago. "I don't believe there is a power in the 'verse that can stop Kaylee from being cheerful." He shouldn't have underestimated the cruelty of the 'verse. Now her sparkle was gone and he wondered if it would ever return. Pain and loss had driven Mal to darkness long ago, and he had never managed to find his way back. He just hoped that Kaylee was stronger than that.

"What's going on here?" the Captain heard Simon's voice ask as it echoed through the engine room.

"Shhhh, you'll wake her up!" Mal scolded quietly. "Help me get her to her room."

Simon nodded as Mal picked Kaylee up. He opened all the doors for the Captain and helped him get Kaylee down the ladder into her bunk. Mal gently placed Kaylee down on her bed and looked at her for a while. He gently stroked her cheek before leaving the room.

"Should I get my medical bag?" Simon asked as Mal left Kaylee's room.

"Not unless you've got somethin' in there that can fix a broken heart," the Captain replied. At the doctor's confused look, he elaborated. "Her family. Killed. By Reavers."

Simon swallowed hard. "How… awful," he commented, not able to find sufficient words to describe the situation. "I trust you broke the news to her a little more gently than that?"

"And I trust I'll not so gently break your face if you continue this conversation," Mal warned. "I know how to take care of my own. You best watch before you suggest any different."

"I'm just worried about Kaylee, that's all," Simon stated.

"And you think I'm not?" Mal asked, getting up in Simon's face so that they were practically nose-to-nose.

Simon sighed. "That's not what I meant." His words seemed to ease Mal a little bit, but not enough for Simon's liking. "How is she?" he asked.

"As terrible as you'd expect her to be," Mal replied. He shook his head and backed away from the doctor. He didn't have time for small talk with Simon, not when Kaylee needed him. "I'm gonna tell the crew what happened, to make sure they're fragile with her. Stay with her until I get back, dong ma? I don't want her waking up alone." He took one last look in the direction of Kaylee's room before leaving, anxious to get back to her sooner rather than later.

Chinese:
mei-mei - dear sister

dong ma? - understand?