Atomic Blonde
"We have reports that early this morning, five prisoners escaped from Bedford Correctional Facility and are deemed extremely dangerous,"
Kitty Vics groaned at the T.V. as she pulled on her left boot and tied it. Today was supposed to be my day off. She slid extra ammo down in her boot for later. Today was supposed to be easy. Now, here I am, gearing up for a shit mission for shit pay. Kitty grabbed her leg holster off the dresser and clipped it on her thigh before getting her beretta. Checking to make sure it was loaded, she shoved it in her right leg holster. Next was the blade. Her blue eyes slid shut, feeling the comforting weight of her favorite weapon in her hands. "Valhalla" was only slightly larger than a knife, but for Kitty Vic's small frame, it was the perfect sword. Taking a deep breath, she hooked the sheath to her left thigh and yanked on it to make sure it was secure.
"We are advising people to stay indoors and if you see any of these people, do not engage!"
Rolling her eyes, she turned off the T.V and glimpsed in the large mirror above her clothes bureau to check her reflection. Her long, golden hair was braided back, with side bangs framing her extremely pale face. She was wearing her uniform-a black skintight bodysuit with a black steel boned kevlar corset as body armor. Kitty could remember when she joined the Avengers and had to tell them why she wore something that looked so uncomfortable. She had them try (unsuccessfully) to slice the ballistic fabric and explained that the steel boning keeps her ribs from being shattered every time she was kicked. At this point, the tightness of the corset was a reassuring constant in her hectic life.
Kitty left her room in the Stark Tower and took the elevator back to the third floor, a level the Avengers used as a living room and kitchen. Sitting at the table was Tony Stark and Steve Rogers, known to the public as Iron Man and Captain America. In the background, a reporter could be heard repeating the same story from earlier as well as the gurgling of a coffee machine. The mercenary strolled past the table, pausing to kiss both men on the cheek.
"Mornin' mom, dad," Kitty called from the kitchen as she opened a cabinet. She filled her favorite mug (one with a Deadpool logo; a Christmas present) with coffee before sitting down in the chair next to Tony. "We dealin' with that?" She nodded towards the T.V. in the corner of the other room.
"Good morning, and yes, we are," Tony replied with a pointed look to his partner. Steve sighed and Kitty raised an eyebrow. Obviously, she had walked in on an argument.
"There a problem here?" She asked slowly, her eyes flicking between both men.
"IRON DICK! CAPTAIN OLDMAN!" Tony sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Steve just looked like someone was pulling out his toenails, a look Kitty Vics had seen several times in her career. She, of course, had always been the one with the pliers. "AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE, THE BEAUTIFUL VIOLENT VIXEN!"
"Hey, Sarge." She greeted the "Merc with a mouth" as he swaggered in. Deadpool was also geared up for a fight, his mask covering his scarred face.
"Sup, Vixen?" He pulled a chair up and sat on it, resting his arms on the back. Deadpool was the one to give Kitty Vics the nickname "The Violent Vixen" when they were in Special Forces together, and she now used it as her mercenary-oh, uh, Avengers name.
Steve gave Tony a 'Look' that clearly asked why Deadpool was here.
"He can't really die," Tony started weakly. "And he's the only one who was available on such short notice."
"I'll watch him," Kitty eagerly suggested, looking at Deadpool in the corner of her eye.
"Oh, no." Steve objected, shaking his head.
"No way in hell are you two going anywhere without a chaperone. We want these men captured," Tony stressed. "As in Not killed."
"Well, that's just unreasonable." She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest, her bottom lip pouting.
"Look, let's just go and get this over with. I'll see if anyone can go with you two. We've got five prisoners to catch before they ruin this city." Steve said as he and Tony stood up from the table.
"Make sure you two are ready to go in five minutes." Both left the room to get their suits on, leaving Deadpool and Kitty alone.
She swung her chair around to mirror Deadpool's, putting her arms on the back and resting her chin on them. "How ya doin', Sarge?"
Deadpool's mouth spread into a grin under his mask. "You know, we're not in the service anymore. You don't have to call me Sarge." He reminded her. Secretly, he loved that Kitty had a nickname that only she used, but he didn't want her to think she had to call him that.
She smiled widely then winked. "Old habits die hard. Besides," She leaned close to him and whispered. "You know you like it. So, take any jobs lately?"
He looked around to make sure no Avengers were listening in before answering. "Easy one in Newark. You?"
"Double in Syracuse. Only took it because they were two child molestors and I needed out of the Tower." She said, looking down as she rubbed her right wrist gingerly, vividly remembering the snap of her bones when one of the men stepped on it. Bruce Banner, the team's resident doctor, had reset it over a week ago and it still hurt every now and again. It frustrated him to no end that Kitty had refused to wear the full cast, and instead had on a soft brace for only two days.
Bruce, who doubled as the Hulk when absolutely necessary, was always setting and patching up Kitty's wounds. He covered for her every time, lying to Tony and Steve about the injuries, and she was grateful. Kitty always wondered, deep down, if he would ever want some form of repayment for the times he's quietly saved her. Little did she know that all he wanted was to be near her, even if it meant stitching her up after she murders someone for money.
"Trouble in paradise?" Deadpool asked with sarcasm. He took it personally that no one ever invited him to stay at Stark Tower like the rest of the Avengers. Tony explained that Deadpool was only a "As-needed Avenger" and would be on call, but could not live there. He mentioned something about his insurance not covering unnatural disasters.
She nodded. "With Barton and Tasha on assignment overseas, Tony and Steve are up my ass being all parental. They tried to give me a curfew! I'm an adult and they want to give me a curfew!" Kitty squeaked, still irritated. "Hopefully when they get back later today, it'll give the elders someone else to worry about."
Bruce Banner shuffled through the living room then, looking half dead. Kitty understood the feeling. He leaned against the kitchen counter, sipping his coffee as he tried to wake up.
"HEY-" Deadpool started before Kitty shushed him.
"Not yet." She whispered, tilting her head in the shaggy haired man's direction. "Just wait."
Kitty always found it entertaining to watch Bruce in the morning because it was always the same: Walk in. Get coffee. Drink the first cup groggily with barely opened eyes. She noticed that he always wore long sleeves and in the mornings they were pulled over his hands so they didn't burn while holding his drink. Kitty thought he looked cute like that. Then, he would finish off the first cup and refill his mug. And only then was he awake enough to speak to.
Deadpool looked to Kitty for permission and she nodded her head. "HEY THERE GREEN THANG."
Bruce just rolled his eyes (a common action for anyone in proximity with Deadpool) and sank down in Tony's chair next to Kitty.
"Mornin' Bruce." Kitty beamed as she reached a hand over and ruffled his hair.
He smiled sleepily and drank more coffee. "Going on a mission?" He yawned.
"Five escaped prisoners burning down the village," She reported casually. "The usual."
People can say a lot about Deadpool, but they can't say he wasn't attentive. He noticed more than the average person, especially about how his family acted around each other. And although they might not classify themselves as such, Deadpool thought of the Avengers as his family. Steve and Tony seemed to be the "Mom and Dad" of the group, and they didn't correct anyone when they were called such.
One of the things Deadpool observed with amusement was Kitty Vics and Bruce Banner's interactions with each other. Like the way Kitty always messed up his already disheveled hair, and how Bruce would lean into her hand slightly. Or how Kitty would look at him when Bruce was too busy bandaging up whatever she injured to notice. To Deadpool, it was obvious the man was in love with Kitty. Although he wasn't positive, he thought maybe Kitty had feelings for the doctor. And Deadpool had made it his personal mission to try to get the two to realize their feelings. He was nothing if not a romantic.
"Tell them to get a room already!" The yellow box trapped inside Deadpool's mind screamed.
"No, that would be rude. We don't want to lose Kitty as a friend. And Bruce is always decent to us." The white box replied.
"That's just because he wants to fuck her." Yellow pointed out.
"Who wouldn't?" White smirked. "She's so fucking hot."
"Yeah, remember that time we saw her when she was changing her shirt in Baghdad?"
"She does have a sexy back."
"Or how about when we were getting our tattoos?"
"And when we had to share the bed…"
"Guys, come on. Don't talk like that, we were both exhausted and it was the only thing they had." Deadpool interjected.
"Sarge, you okay over there?" Kitty asked gently, quieting down the boxes. She and Bruce had stopped talking and were now looking at him in concern.
"Yeah," Deadpool nodded, realizing that he said that last part out loud. He quickly decided to change the topic. "You pumped to go kill some fucking bad guys?"
"There will be no killing of bad guys, children." Tony pointed out as he and Steve strolled into the room, ready to leave.
"But daaaaaad," Kitty whined playfully as Deadpool pouted behind his mask.
"No 'buts', listen to your father," Steve chimed in, marching past the table. "And you two better be ready to go."
"Should I prepare the medical quarters?" Bruce asked Tony and Steve, the unspoken leaders of the group.
Tony looked at Deadpool and Kitty, both of whom smiled sweetly. "Are you two going to behave?"
Deadpool shook his head.
"Not in the slightest." Kitty answered, getting up and adjusting her leg holster. Tony just sighed and shook his head.
Bruce got up as well, watching Kitty fix her armor with interest. "I'll have everything set up in case. Be careful, please." He added.
"Always." Kitty promised with a smile, just as she did every time she left for patrol. Just like his predictable morning coffee routine, Bruce would always ask that she be careful. After so many years of not having a family, Kitty liked that she had people now who would miss her if she was gone.
"Goodbye, my love!" Deadpool joked, blowing a kiss to Bruce, who just shook his head.
"Come on, Sergeant Bilko," Kitty nodded to the hallway and put on her black sunglasses. "Let's get to work."
Steve, Tony, Kitty, and Deadpool left Stark Tower to find the escaped convicts.
Kitty cleared her throat and said, "Alright, listen up, ladies and gentlemen, our fugitive has been on the run for ninety minutes. Average foot speed over uneven ground barring injuries is 4 miles-per-hour. That gives us a radius of six miles. What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in that area...Checkpoints go up at fifteen miles. Your fugitive's name is Dr. Richard Kimble. Go get him!"
Deadpool and Tony couldn't help but laugh at her movie reference.
"Okay..." Steve turned to Kitty with a defeated look. "Why don't you and Deadpool take over the North and West side. Tony and I will take East and South."
"Are you sure you want them together?" Tony asked, shocked.
"We're running out of time and they'll cover more ground." Captain America explained begrudgingly as Kitty carefully put in her earpiece and checked it with JARVIS.
"We'll be good," She reassured them. Deadpool started to snicker, so she hit him on the shoulder, hard. "We've got a system."
Iron Man nodded in approval. He appreciated their military background, even if it was doing questionable things. It made them both alert and thorough. "Keep your com open." He reminded her as he and Captain America started going South through the city.
"Come on, Sarge." Kitty called as she walked North, with Deadpool following closely behind.
"So, do you ever wonder if we'll end up on a show like Forensic Files?" Deadpool asked as they started their search for the escaped convicts.
"Do you mean as the victims or the perpetrators? Because I try very hard to keep my prints out of the petri dishes." Kitty held up her hand and wiggled her fingers.
"I mean, in general. What could they even do with my DNA?" Deadpool wondered. "Wouldn't it just grow back into something?"
"I don't know," Kitty admitted. "Wanna rob a bank and find out?"
They caught people's attention walking down a New York street dressed like that. The real New Yorkers just went along with their day, but the unsuspecting visitors gawked...Especially at the Violent Vixen, clad in black spandex and leather.
"Hey, pretty mama. You look like you want a fun time." A man they passed called out to her.
"Hey, asshat," Kitty Vics mocked. "You look like the complete opposite of a fun time. Ever heard of shampoo?"
"I'll show you how a real man does it." The man started following them and Deadpool moved to grab one of his guns.
"I got this," She avowed. Kitty pulled out her gun as she turned around, pressing the barrel to the vulgar catcaller's chest. "What were you sayin'?"
"I...uh…" The man held his hands up and stammered, looking at Deadpool for help. The Violent Vixen moved her gun downwards.
"Maybe you should apologize to the lady." Deadpool suggested.
"I'm very sorry, Miss." A trickle of sweat slid down his forehead. An older man in a expensive business suit walked by, doing a double take at the situation. He met the catcaller's eyes and shook his head before continuing on his way. She still had the gun pointed at his crotch.
"Come on, Vicky," Deadpool tried, putting his hand on her shoulder. "He apologized and we've got a job to do." She reluctantly holstered her gun and started to walk away. The man sighed in relief and ran off in the opposite direction without looking back.
A few tense moments passed before Deadpool broke the silence. "You okay?" He asked.
"Why wouldn't I be?" She answered without looking at him. Kitty picked up her pace slightly.
"I've seen you pull a gun out on someone for a lot of things," He commented, ignoring the boxes suggestions what could be troubling her. "But never for just being a creep."
"I've pulled a gun on you before," She joked, then noticed that Deadpool's expression. "I'm fine, okay? Just drop it. Like you said, we've got a job to do."
Deadpool was about to reply back when he felt the Kitty throw her arm out to stop him. She was so small, however, that it only came to his waist. She pressed a finger to her mouth before holding up five fingers, then made a fist and nodded to an alleyway on their left.
"Be quiet, at least five baddies on the left in the dark, creepy alleyway. Got it." The yellow box translated.
The Violent Vixen quickly peered around the corner into the alley. There they were, just as she'd thought.
She pressed a small button on the side of her arm cuff that activated her ear piece. "We've got all five of them in an alley off Bowery." She whispered into her com. "Ralpho, Ivkington, Smith, Costers, and Andrews."
"Do you need help?" Iron Man's voice rang through her earpiece.
"Nah, dad. We got it."
She nodded to Deadpool, who pulled out two of his guns. She looked at him and sharply shook her head. "No guns." Kitty mouthed silently. He reluctantly put away his weapons and pressed himself up against the wall next to her. "Ready?" He nodded. "Well, what do we got here?" Kitty asked loudly as she stepped into the alley. All five of the prisoner's heads whipped around to stare at her.
"Looks like a cock gobbler convention," Deadpool answered. A convict moved and Deadpool saw that they had been mugging a teenager. One of the scumbags grabbed a weapon and aimed it at the duo. The poor, beaten up teen took this opportunity to run in the opposite direction.
Both anti-heros sprang into action. Kitty ran towards Ralpho, who was holding a large knife dripping with the teenager's blood. Ralpho swung the blade, but it only cut through air as Kitty ducked down to miss it. She punched him in the stomach, hard, then elbowed in him the face. When he recoiled back, she kicked him square in the chest. Recovering quickly, Ralpho used his free hand to throw a punch aimed at her face while he swung the knife at her body. She grabbed his arm and twisted it back behind him before she shoved his face into the wall. Ralpho got one arm free and slashed at her with the knife. Kitty felt it slice her arm, taking her aback. He elbowed her in the face and peeled himself off the wall as he squared up to her.
Kitty's black sunglasses broke with the hit to her face and she squinted from the sun. "Motherfucker, you broke my fucking sunglasses!" She kicked him in the groin, hard. "I liked those fucking glasses."
Thinking fast, she ran and kicked off of the brick wall with her left foot, using the momentum to kick his jaw. Ralpho hit the ground as she landed on her feet. Kitty quickly handcuffing him to a pipe.
One down, four to go.
She looked up and saw Costers stalking closer to her. He was at least 6"5' and built like a linebacker. And (if she remembered correctly) he was a rapist. Kitty felt hot anger surge in her as she fought the urge to grab her blade tucked in its sheath. Fucking heros and their 'no weapons unless absolutely necessary' bullshit, she thought. Fuck.
Costers charged towards Kitty. She darted to the side, causing him to ram his fist into the wall. His hand bone shattered with a loud, sickening crack. This, however, only seemed to enrage him more, and he moved to attack her again. He slammed the right side of his body into her, trapping her against the wall. Kitty drew in a very painful breath; She was pretty sure that this asshole just cracked a rib or two. It felt like she was breathing in razorblades and her vision blurred slightly around the edges.
A piece of metal caught Kitty's eyes and she swooped down, avoiding another hit from Costers, to grab the crowbar. The next time he tried to hit her, she raised the crowbar, watching in satisfaction as his face warped with pain when his meaty fist smashed into it. She held it in both hands like a sword and bashed it against Coster's thigh three times. He doubled over slightly and she reached for a pair of handcuffs. Costers used this opportunity to punch the right side of her face before he picked her up and threw her further down the alley.
The Violent Vixen blacked out when her head hit the brick wall. She woke up to Costers' black boot kicking her in the chest and ribs. She used her arms to cover her head as he reached down and grabbed her by her hair.
Meanwhile, Deadpool was dealing with the other three convicts.
"That's going to leave a mark!" Yellow complimented as Deadpool hit Smith's head twice on an exposed metal pipe.
"Hey, remember, no killing!" White nagged.
"Why not?!"
"If you fuck this up, the Avengers won't invite us out anymore." The white box pointed out. "And they definitely won't let us play with Vicky."
"Oh, yeah. You're right"
Deadpool had just finished handcuffing Smith to the pipe when he felt himself being stabbed. He looked down and saw that Andrews had slid a long shard of glass into his chest.
"You son of a motherfucker," Deadpool cursed. Andrew's eyes widened, realizing that stabbing him did not have the intending effect. "You shit eating fucker dick tip licking asshat!"
Deadpool pulled out the glass, wincing slightly as he felt the nerves reattaching and the skin growing back, then used it to stab Andrews in the shoulder. Deadpool happily handcuffed him to the same pipe as Smith, knocking him out for good measure.
Further down the alley, Kitty was trying to get out of the choke hold that Costers had her in.
"Do you know what I like to do to pretty little things like you?" He whispered into her ear. He had grabbed Ralpho's knife and moved his arm across her collarbone so he could press the blade against her neck. Kitty felt it biting into her skin as she edged them around slightly so she was facing the wall. She then launched herself towards the bricks, using them to flip herself over his head. The Vixen could feel her warm blood now dripping actively from her neck and onto his back. She tightened her thighs that were now around his thick throat and smiled as he gasped for air. She shifted her thighs swiftly and Costers slumped to the ground, dead.
Kitty staggered a bit, gasping for breath as she fought to stay upright. "Do you know what I like to do," She gasped with exhaustion. "To assholes like you?" As a final "fuck you", she spit out blood next to his unmoving body.
Kitty Vics shuffled over to where Deadpool was, keeping pressure on her neck with her hand. She didn't believe it was fatal, but she also didn't want to clean blood out of her uniform again. Ivnkington, upon seeing his comrade's failings, surrendered...Much to the disappointment of Deadpool.
"That's it?" He complained. "You're just going to give up?" Ivnkington, who couldn't have been older than twenty-five, nodded sharply. He was in prison for credit card fraud and was regretting his unsuccessful escape. Deadpool handcuffed him to the pole, still shaking his head at the man's lack of fight. He then turned and saw her neck wound.
"HOLY SHIT, VIXEN, ARE YOU OKAY?" Deadpool screamed as he ran the short distance between them. She was breathing heavy, leaning on the brick wall for support. She was losing more blood than she'd originally thought. Deadpool tore a long piece of cloth off the dead man's shirt and tied it around Kitty's neck. Her eyes burned from the sun and she felt a pain in her head starting.
Kitty weakly pressed her finger on her arm cuff and said, "All five prisoners are taken care of. One's dead but the others are alive, waiting to be picked up."
"Cops are on their way to get them." Tony said through the com channel, his voice dripping with annoyance. "Which one's dead?" He didn't know why he let Steve send the two mercenaries off together.
"Costers." Kitty coughed as she wrapped one arm around Deadpool's shoulders so he could help support her. She interrupted Tony's rant. "We're headin' back to the Tower." She ripped out the earpiece and clipped it to her shirt collar. She was not in the mood to have another person in her head.
"How you doing, Louisiana?" Deadpool asked worriedly as they started limping back. She was paler than usual and it was scaring him more than he'd like to admit.
"Just talk about somethin'," Kitty murmured. "Anythin'."
Deadpool said one of the first things that come into his head. "How do you feel about Banner?"
"I could really use him now." She was shaking really badly now and Deadpool was carrying most of her weight. "And his magnificent, medically trained body. Or anybody at this point."
Deadpool nodded. "Well, you've got me. I know it's not much…" A woman briskly walked past them, pushing a stroller with a baby in it. She turned to look at them and smiled.
"Hey, that's some really cool makeup!" She gushed. "You should work for the movies."
Kitty stared at the women until she became uncomfortable and left. "I'd rather have you than that," Kitty pointed out. "Besides, it could be worse."
Deadpool gazed at her in shock. "How could this be worse?!"
"I could've been patrollin' with Thor the Mighty Asshat." She smirked. "He probably would have left me." Her vision blurred again and her words started slurring. "Thanks for not leavin' me, Sarge."
They were only half a block away from the Stark Tower when the Violent Vixen fell, too woozy from blood loss to walk. Deadpool easily scooped her up in his arms and started running, feeling the panic set in. He grabbed the earpiece from her shirt and put it in his ear. "JARVIS, CAN YOU HEAR ME?" Deadpool screamed.
"Yes, Mr. Deadpool, I can hear you just fine." The cool voice answered.
"TELL BANNER THAT KITTY'S HURT REALLY BAD. WE SHOULD BE THERE IN A COUPLE MINUTES!"
"I will notify him."
Deadpool rolled his eyes at the computer system's calmness as he pushed himself to run faster. He glimpsed down at his friend and wished he hadn't. She looked tiny and frail in his arms, shivering slightly as her throat continued to leak blood. He sprinted into the Tower and up to the med bay where Bruce Banner was waiting anxiously.
He immediately snapped into doctor mode, helping Deadpool remove her corset, boots, and holsters before placing her gently on the gurney.
"Get me one of those gowns," The doctor pointed to the corner. "We're going to have to take off her suit." Bruce couldn't help but think that this wasn't how he wanted to see her. He carefully unzipped the front of her suit to her bellybutton and pried the material off her arms. "How long has she been unconscious?" He ran his sterile gloved fingers over her reddish-purple side, and came to the conclusion that there were probably several broken and displaced ribs. He idly noticed that she had a tattoo on the side of her ribs.
Deadpool laid the gown over her, trying to give his best friend some modesty. He tied the neck pieces together as the doctor worked the suit down her legs. "She hasn't been out longer than five minutes." Now that she was covered by the gown, Bruce unhooked her bra and set it aside.
Banner quickly slapped an O2 mask on her before grabbing a suture kit from a table. He snapped on a pair of gloves and opened a new needle.
"Woah, what is that?" Deadpool asked.
"Here, put on these gloves," Banner ordered. "I'm going to sew up her neck, and then we'll have do a transfusion. Luckily," He examined Kitty Vic's neck carefully, grimacing at the depth of the wound and the clamminess of her skin. "Tony keeps this place pretty well stocked." He started wiping as much blood off her as possible, refusing to let himself look at her bruised face; Refusing to let himself lose control.
"You can't just give her the blood now?" Deadpool flinched slightly when he saw the doctor start to sew up her neck.
"She's going to diiieee!" The yellow box sang.
"No, she won't. She's tough. She'll be fine."
"Her blood looks like pretty red paint on her pretty pale body…"
"DEADPOOL," Bruce Banner hardly raised his voice (a side effect of the fear of turning into a green monster and hurting people) but the mercenary just stood there, staring off into space. "I NEED YOUR HELP."
Deadpool shook his head, trying to make the boxes leave, when he heard the doctor shouting at him. Deadpool snapped back and took the gauze pads that Banner was shoving at him.
"And to answer your earlier question, I can't give her blood," Banner explained distractedly as he tied off another suture. "Until the wound is closed or else she would just bleed it all out." Deadpool watched as he expertly put in more sutures. "I need you to cover the wound with some gauze pads and tape them down with that paper tape while I prep for the transfusion. She's getting shocky..."
Deadpool concentrated as hard as he could to bandage her neck up while Banner whirled around the room like a tornado. Within seconds, an IV line was in her arm and he had hooking it up to a bag of clear liquid. Banner had multiple syringes he pushed in her line, checking her pulse with each one. He then put a stethoscope on her chest and pressed on her ribs, listening to her ragged breathing. Deadpool was changing his gloves when he heard angry voices getting louder as they came up the hall.
"Kitty Stark, what the hell do you think you're doing?! I told you to keep your com open and don't kill anyone and what do you do-" Tony Stark's yelling was cut off when he saw Kitty on the bed and the blood everywhere. He eased into the room and it felt like his heart had stopped. Steve Rogers stopped in the doorway and the annoyance on his face was replaced with fear.
"Tony, I need you and Steve to wash your hands and glove up." Bruce ordered as he pulled down the neck of her gown a few inches and stuck EKG leads on her chest. Both men, upon seeing the seriousness of the situation, immediately did as they were told. "Steve, I need you to watch her vitals on this monitor-Tell me if these numbers change at all. Tony, I need you to grab me two units of O negative blood and then we'll probably need the portable x-ray machine for her ribs." Tony nodded mutely and ran off.
Tony came back with the blood and handed it off to Bruce, the only one here who actually knew what he was doing, before going back for the equipment. Tony rolled it in and Steve helped him take the x-rays.
Bruce sighed loudly, examining the pictures of her ribs. "Looks like she fractured her third rib, and broke her fourth. Good news," The three men looked up hopefully. "No punctured or collapsed lungs. We'll wrap her up, then do the transfusion."
Two times throughout the procedure, Steve informed them that something on the screen changed and Banner would swear loudly as he tried to fix it. After what seemed like forever, the transfusion was done.
"Is she going to be okay?" Tony asked fearfully as he and Steve stripped off their gloves.
Banner checked all of her vital signs before saying, "Her pulse is a little high and her BP is currently 110 over 60. O2 is at 91%. Which, considering the amount of blood loss, is doing pretty well." He degloved and started washing his hands. "She'll be out cold from the medication for another couple hours."
After being assured that there was nothing left for them to do, Tony, Steve, and Deadpool left the macabre room in silence. Once they got to the kitchen, Tony exploded with anger.
"What happened?" He hissed at Deadpool, stepping closer with each word.
Deadpool pressed his back to the dining table, resembling a caged animal. "I was fighting off three of them. By the time I handcuffed them, I saw that she was hurt and one was dead."
"Why weren't you paying more attention?" Steve demanded, his arms crossed over his chest.
"Well, maybe if I didn't have to waste time handcuffing them…" Deadpool retorted. He heard the buzzing of the two boxes in his mind, fighting to be heard.
"You two were partners, you were supposed to have her back." Tony slammed his fist down on the table.
"He's right, you know." The yellow box taunted.
"How many times did she save your ass when you two were in the service together?"
"Too many times to count. And how many times has he let her down?"
"Why does she even like you? You're an awful person who can't even keep his friends alive."
"She's going to die and it's all your fucking fault, Wade."
Deadpool slid to the floor and put both hands over his ears to try to block out the noises, both inside his head and out. He started rocking back and forth, closing his eyes tightly as Tony and Steve stared down at him in shock. They knew that he joked about hearing voices before, but they never thought he was serious about it. Banner walked in the room and saw their horrified faces at Deadpool's fit. He'd seen Kitty deal with this once before. He rushed over to Deadpool and cautiously tried to talk to him.
"Deadpool? Deadpool, can you hear me?" Banner didn't dare touch him, but needed to get the merc out of this state. He tried a new tactic. "Wham! is a terrible band."
One of Deadpool's eyes opened slightly and he stopped rocking.
"There you are. Come on," Banner said gently. "We're going back to the med bay." He helped Deadpool up and took him out of the room. Banner led him up a level to the med bay and sat him down in one of the chairs by her bed. "You should be here when she wakes up."
"Why?" Deadpool spat. "So she can tell me how much I let her down? About how I was supposed to protect her, and that this," He gestured wildly at her body. "Is all my fault?"
Bruce sighed, sinking into the other chair. "She would never say that."
They were both silent for what seemed like hours; The only noise was the monitors beeping to say that Kitty was stable and alive. Neither Tony nor Steve came in, for which Deadpool was thankful for. He didn't think he could face Kitty, let alone her two, overprotective "parents". Every minute that passed by, Deadpool thought of bolting. At one point, he started to rise from his chair, only to stop when he saw Bruce Banner's face.
"You love her." It wasn't a question, but a statement. Deadpool already knew the answer.
"Who doesn't?" Bruce asked with a glance at Kitty, whose face was calm in sleep. His eyes, filled with longing, stayed on her.
"They all love her as family, like a daughter." He pointed out as he leaned closer to Bruce. "You're in love with her."
"It doesn't matter anyway," Bruce said sadly. "It's not like we could ever be together."
Deadpool blinked rapidly, obviously taken aback. This was not in his 'get-Kitty-and-Banner-together' plan. "Why not?"
"Isn't it obvious? My "little problem"?" He snorted. "She'd never want me." Bruce paused before saying, "And even if she did, she'd never be safe."
"I've never known that girl to be safe." Deadpool chuckled. "I remember one time, we were in Bulgaria to take care of a team that was planning an attack on the U.S. It was me, her, and two other guys and we get ambushed. Turns out, there was triple what our intel said. So, we're standing there, out of ammo, with at least eleven guys closing in on us. And then, our very own Violent Vixen draws out a fucking sword from god knows where and charges them." He slowly shook his head. "Killed every single one of those bastards. She turns to us, holding this fucking sword with these guy's blood dripping down her body, and says, 'Anyone up for a drink?'"
Bruce laughed because of how clearly he could see her doing that.
"And this other time," Deadpool continued. "She showed up on a horse. A white fucking horse. I still don't know where she got a horse in the middle of St. Petersburg…"
The two exchanged stories about her for an hour and a half, both enjoying each others company.
Deadpool was in the middle of telling about the time Kitty had pranked two of their team members by putting itching powder in their underwear. "And the only ones who knew she did it was me, Josey, and Kingsley. So, we're all standing at attention for the inspection and Matthews and Beleflore can't stop squirming, trying to find a way to itch their dicks without getting in trouble. Josey and I are trying not to laugh and I look over, and Kitty is completely stone faced. Absolutely no emotion. Finally, they ask "What the hell is wrong with you two?" and Matthews starts-"
His story was interrupted. "Please, tell me you're not talking about the Itching Incident, again." Bruce's eyes followed the voice and saw that Kitty was awake.
"I happen to find it hilarious." Deadpool answered, not noticing that it was his friend in the hospital bed that spoke.
"That's because you didn't get caught." She complained. "Or ratted out."
"Well, it's not my fault that Josey couldn't keep his damn mouth shut-Hey, you're alive!" He yelled as he got up from his chair.
"Well, I am a main character. What kind of author kills off one of their main characters this early in the story?" She asked, groaning as she tried to sit up.
Bruce Banner immediately rose from his seat."You broke a rib and fractured another. You shouldn't be moving."
Kitty just stared at him like he was stupid.
"You were extremely lucky that it didn't pierce your lung," Bruce nagged as he helped her sit up. "You're going to have a lot of bruising, the worst of it being on your face and ribs."
Kitty's hand flew up to her cheek, her face full of worry.
"Don't worry, you're still the most beautiful and deadly mercenary I've ever met." Deadpool pat her leg gingerly to comfort her. He glared sharply at Banner, who looked abashed.
"No, I didn't mean-that you," He gestured to Kitty. "Look bad, I mean, you never look bad." Bruce stammered, red faced.
"Just shut up, man." Deadpool advised. The moment turned awkward as the three exchanged uncomfortable glances. "I'm going to go tell everyone you're up."
"Okay." Kitty smiled softly as Deadpool walked out of the med bay with one last pointed look at Banner.
"I'm really glad you're okay." Bruce said. "Wait, what are you doing?" He asked as he watched Kitty start to peel off her IV tape.
"I fucking hate hospitals." She said as she threw the tape down. Kitty then prepped to slide her IV out.
"Technically, this isn't an actual hospital." The doctor rolled his eyes before moving to the other side of the bed. "Don't do it like that. You'll hurt yourself." He carefully removed her IV and pressed a cotton ball to the crook of her arm. "Put pressure, I'll get some tape." He turned to grab the tape and when he looked back, she was removing the leads from her chest. "Now what are you doing?" Bruce whined as he taped over her arm's gauze pad.
"I want out." Kitty, who was still looking down at her chest, peeled off the last of the adhesive squares. "I need a shower and I'm starvin'." She heard her accent making an appearance and fought to keep it at bay. "Starving. Very hungry."
"Can I tell you all the reasons why that's a terrible idea?"
"No, but I feel like you're going to tell me anyways." Kitty had finally removed all the tethers to the machine and was trying to get up. It was difficult though, with a taped up side and the fact that she was incredibly sore all over. She gave a cry of pain as she fell onto the floor, landing hard on her side. She looked up at Bruce with large, sad blue eyes. "Little help here?"
"I swear," He sighed as he carefully helped her stand up and put his arm around her waist. "You do this just to be difficult."
"Gotta keep ya on your toes," Kitty smiled. She shifted slightly before giving another yelp of pain.
"Hey, you're okay!" Tony's voice rang as he and Steve walked into the room. His eyebrows furrowed at the sight of Kitty being held up by Bruce Banner.
"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Steve asked, very concerned with Kitty's health.
"God, not you too." Kitty plead as she tried to take a step forward, but stumbled slightly, causing all the males in the room to move as if to catch her. She made a scoffing noise and rolled her eyes. "Hey, mom and dad."
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Tony demanded as Kitty took another step, aided by Bruce.
"I think," She started. "I'm gonna take a shower and then go eat." Kitty reached her free hand up to tuck a golden strand of hair behind her ear.
Steve turned to Bruce. "Is that wise?"
"Not at all, but are you going to stop her?" Bruce responded. Kitty glared at the two men until they moved out of the door way for them to pass.
"I'll see you two at dinner!" She called back to them.
It took Bruce and Kitty longer than usual to get back to her floor, but after some stumbling and limping, they made it in.
"About the shower…" Bruce began, unsure of how to proceed.
"I was thinking, you can stand in the doorway so if there's a problem, you'll be right there." Kitty explained as they walked in her room.
It smelled like orange blossoms and sea air, Bruce noted. They stepped into the bathroom and Kitty took hold of the sink to help keep herself upright.
"Now, I know you had to take off my suit to get me in this gown, which is ridiculous, by the way," She added. "But I still want you to turn around, at least until I get behind the shower curtain."
"Oh, of course." He nodded, turning around so he could look at her room. The walls were painted a cool, purple slate color, standing out dramatically against her dark wood furniture. The room was very warm and comforting to Bruce, who found solace in the jewel tones. He soon heard the shower water start.
"Okay, I'm in. You can turn around now." She chimed from inside the shower.
Bruce leaned against the door frame and tried to think of something to say. "So, what's your tattoo?" He asked.
"What?"
"The tattoo on your side." Bruce prompted. "I saw it when I was taping up your ribs."
"It's a Special Forces thing." Kitty said shortly. She didn't know why, but she always felt uncomfortable discussing her tattoo with people who had never served. Kitty knew that no matter how hard they tried, they could never understand.
"So, what terrible things has Deadpool been telling you about me?" She asked as she poured shampoo into her hand and lathered it in her long hair.
"Nothing terrible. I think I know now why you two aren't really allowed to work together, though. He told me about the confirmed kills thing."
"He's still pissy about that?" Kitty laughed as she rinsed out her hair. "He was complaining about it in front of Steve because even with the numbers updated, I've got him beat by, like, thirty people. You can guess where that went." She worked conditioner in her hair and quickly washed her face.
"Yeah, the good guys have strong feelings about murder for hire." There was a moment of tense silence and Bruce realized he might have gone too far. "Deadpool blames himself for you getting hurt." He said softly.
She sighed. "It's not his fault. He was dealing with the other guys. It happens." Kitty started washing her body, trying to ignore how painful the task was.
"He loves you, you know." Bruce said very matter-of-factly.
"Like a sister." Kitty clarified. She rinsed out the conditioner, turned off the water, and started wringing out her hair. "Could you hand me a towel?" She stuck her hand out from the curtain and took the green towel from Bruce.
"Everyone loves you."
"Except Thor," Kitty started as she dried off her body. "He hates me."
"Remind me again how that happened?"
"I don't know. Neither of us ever liked each other." Kitty shrugged. "Just personality clash, I guess."
"So he's the cousin, twice removed, that doesn't like you."
Kitty laughed. "Tony and Steve see me as the daughter they never asked for."
"You're like a niece for Nat and Clint." Bruce added.
"And what about you?" She asked, peering her head from out behind the curtain. They locked eyes for several seconds before Kitty stuck her head back in the shower and dried her hair.
"What about me?" He decided to try to play it cool. He wasn't about to ruin their friendship if she didn't feel the same way about him.
"Well, we talked about how Deadpool, Thor, mom and dad, and even how Tasha and Clint see me," Kitty wrapped the towel around her body and gingerly stepped out of the shower. She grabbed her brush from the counter and pulled it through her hair. "But not about you."
"It doesn't matter," He smiled lightly, trying to write it off. Bruce searched his mind to think of any topic change possible.
(Narrator: "The weather, perhaps?")
"It matters to me." She whispered, stepping in front of him. Kitty looked up at him before her eyes flicked down to his lips.
He quickly closed the space between them, running his hand through her damp hair. The moment his lips touched hers, it was as if a firework had gone off. Bruce's lips were hot on hers, urgent and needing. Kitty's various wounds hurt, but she tried to push the thought away as she wrapped her arm around the back of his neck. She felt his arm pulling her closer, keeping her pressed against him.
Finally, she had to break the kiss. He looked at her, his eyes full of guilt as if he had done something wrong.
"No, it's not you." Her hand flew to her throat. "My neck kinda hurts."
His eyes widened and he mentally berated himself for only now remembering that she was still injured. "Sit," He ordered. He kneeled down and carefully peeled off the gauze. "Looks like this one stitch is pulling but luckily, hasn't ripped yet. Do you have any bandages?"
"Under the cupboard there."
Bruce retrieved a gauze pad and some tape and began covering up her gruesome looking wound.
"That good, huh?" Kitty asked, upon noticing Bruce's grimace.
"It's that you got hurt in general," He looked up at her. "I don't like it, never did." Bruce added, ripping off the last piece of tape and adding it to her neck. "There you go." He helped Kitty up and pulled her close.
She gave him a quick kiss before pushing him away slightly. "I need to get dressed." She walked out of the bathroom and opened up one of her bureau drawers. Turning, Kitty saw that he was still standing in the bathroom doorway. "Go wait outside." She waved her hand at him. "I'll be out in a minute."
Bruce Banner walked out of her bedroom and closed the door behind him. His mind replayed the incident, and he momentarily found himself wondering if he had just imagined it. He looked down at his hand and felt that it was still slightly wet from being in her damp hair and smiled to himself.
"Hola, mi amigo verde y bestial," Deadpool greeted as he walked through Kitty's living room. "¿La Belleza está ahí?"
Bruce rubbed his forehead with one hand before answering. "Deadpool, you know I don't speak Spanish."
"Iron Giant Dick sent me up here to check on you two. Dinner's in ten minutes." Deadpool disclosed as he leaned his back on the wall across from Bruce. The two stared at each other for moment before Bruce spoke.
"They're letting you stay for dinner? Since when?" He nodded his head to the mercenary, who had been banned from "family meals" since The Projectile Potato Catastrophe. They had also resolved to never have mashed potatoes again, much to Steve's displeasure.
"I convinced them to let me stay. For Kitty's sake, of course."
Bruce rolled his eyes. He could tell that Deadpool was going to milk her being injured as long as he could.
The door opened and Kitty stepped out in a pair of leggings and a large black sweatshirt. It's all about the comfort.
"Hola mi hermosa flor mortal," Deadpool bowed dramatically.
Kitty smiled and said, "Hola, mi guapo amigo rojo y negro vestido."
Deadpool cocked his head to the side, resembling a dog. "¿Guapo?"
"English, guys," Bruce reminded them.
"Ahora es nuestra oportunidad de chismear sobre él." Deadpool divulged to Kitty with a smirk. "¿Crees que todo se vuelve verde?"
Kitty turned to Bruce and said, "He said he will be delighted to speak English for you."
"That's not what the subtitles said." Deadpool said in a singsong tone before starting off to the elevator with Bruce and Kitty lagging behind.
"Sorry about the slowness," She apologized as Bruce shifted the arm wrapped around her waist. "Still kinda sore."
"You've only been up for an hour, it's to be expected." Bruce reassured her. "Actually, you're not even supposed to be out of bed yet."
"Eh, details." Kitty shrugged. They took the lift down and walked into the dining room, looking up when the cheers erupted.
Soon, Kitty, Bruce, Steve, Tony, Natasha Romanoff, and Clint Barton were all sitting at the table, laughing and talking. Even Deadpool was welcome, sitting between Kitty and Tony, making jokes and adding to the stories floating around. But, like all fun things, the night came to a close and everyone went off on their own.
Kitty was heading back up to her room when Bruce fell into step beside her. "Are you going to make my life easier and sleep in the med bay tonight, like you're supposed to?" Kitty stopped and turned her head, her eyebrow raised and her mouth curled into a smirk. "Right." Bruce nodded and shoved his hands in the pockets of his pajamas.
"Look, I'm not sleeping down there, it's cold and I'm not doing it." She crossed her arms over her chest, trying to discreetly grab her side. It had started throbbing again, and seemed to get worse with each step.
"You shouldn't even be out of the med bay!" Bruce argued. "You just woke up, what if you have a problem when you're sleeping? Or you rip a stitch? I know for a fact that your side is killing you."
"Is not." She lied as she shifted her weight to the other foot.
"Then why are you gripping your ribs like that?" He asked pointedly. Kitty looked down and sighed. "Here," He produced a yellow bottle of pills. "It's Toradol. I know you refuse to take narcotics. It won't do much but it should take a bit of the edge off."
Kitty took the bottle gratefully. "Thanks." The others didn't understand why she never took narcotics, but Bruce never pushed it.
"Now will you stay in the infirmary?" Bruce tried.
"Are you bribing me with drugs? For shame, Dr. Banner." She joked. "Look, why don't you just sleep over in my room if it bothers you that much?" Kitty turned back around and continued to her room. "Well, are you coming?" She asked over her shoulder.
Bruce quietly fell in step behind her then stood awkwardly by her bedroom door. "So, do you want me to take the couch?"
Kitty flicked on the lights and carefully peeled off her sweatshirt to reveal a berry colored tank top underneath. She stepped into the bathroom to get some water, quickly popping two white pills in her mouth before continuing to her bed. Bruce noticed that some of the pink splotches on her back and shoulders had started to develop into bruises.
Kitty pulled back the dark blue bedding and slid under the covers. She looked up and saw that he was still standing awkwardly at the door. "We're adults, Bruce." Kitty pointed out. "I think we can share a king sized bed without any problems."
Bruce Banner, standing absolutely still in the room, watched as she rolled onto her side to look at him.
"Well, are you comin'?"
Bruce nodded silently as he turned off the lights, and walked up to the large bed. She flipped back the covers and patted the spot next to her.
The bed was comfortable and warm, especially with Kitty next to him. Worried, he reached a hand over to feel her forehead. "Your skin is really hot." He pressed his hand to her shoulder and felt that it, too, was a little feverish.
"Stop doctoring," She complained, closing her eyes. "The meds will kick in soon." Kitty readjusted her pillow and fell into a hot and uncomfortable sleep.
Bruce woke up just an hour later on his back with Kitty hugging him. She was laying on her side with her leg draped over his torso and her head tucked up on his chest. His arm was wrapped protectively around her back, keeping her pressed up against him. Bruce had never realized just how small Kitty was until then; She was half his size. He looked down, gently brushing a strand of hair out of her face, and breathed a sigh of relief. Her fever had gone down but unfortunately, she stirred. Bruce lay completely petrified as she nuzzled closer to him, pressing her face on the skin near his heart as she continued sleeping. He fell back asleep, a soft smile on his face as he hugged her closer to him.
Kitty woke up nine hours later with an intense pain in her side and shortness of breath. She quickly noticed that she was on top of Bruce, who was still dead asleep and snoring. She carefully pried herself off of him and went into the bathroom to take more pain medication and brush her teeth. She examined her face carefully in the mirror.
The bruise had settled into a large, dark purple spot covering most of her eye and cheek. Smaller bruises spotted her collarbone, knuckles, arms, and legs. She cautiously pulled up her shirt and saw that her back was also covered in deep bruises around every single vertebrae, with several cuts from the brick wall she was thrown against. Lastly was her neck, which was still wrapped up. She undid the wrappings and gasped at the sight. It was worse than she'd thought. The skin around the cut was red and tight, and there was a dark and uneven gash being held closed with dark blue stitches. It was rather gruesome.
In the corner of the mirror, she noticed that Bruce was laying in bed, awake, watching her examine her neck. She met his eyes in the mirror and turned to look at him. "Mornin'." She called cheerfully. He just stared at her unhappily, his face dejected and disappointed. "What's wrong?"
"I am so sorry, Kitty." Bruce murmured sadly.
Kitty stood in the bathroom doorway and tilted her head to the side a little, her eyebrows drawn together. "For what?"
"It's going to scar." Bruce tapped his neck with his finger. "There was nothing I could do besides sew it up." He explained. "It's never going to be unnoticable."
Kitty hopped on the bed, ignoring the heavy pain in her side, and cuddled close to Bruce. "It's not my first scar and most definitely won't be the last." She looked up at him. "Besides," She sat up and tied her long hair up in a ponytail. "I didn't think it was that bad. Could come in handy to intimidate people. Besides, it kinda suits me, don't cha think?" She smiled devilishly, swaying her ponytail to the side. "Are you staying in bed all day?"
"Depends."
"On what?" Kitty asked with a smirk.
Bruce smiled softly. "If you stay in bed with me."
Kitty laughed, "Nice try, love." She quickly kissed his cheek before stepping into her closet. "But I'm starving."
"I'll take you out to breakfast, then. As a date. I mean, only if you want." He added nervously. Kitty poked her head out from the closet, a wide smile on her face.
"A breakfast date. I like it."
Bruce begrudgingly rolled out of bed. "I'm going to go get dressed. Meet you in the family room?"
"Sounds good."
Bruce yawned as he walked out to Kitty's living room and opened the door leading out to the hall, nearly running into someone. Tony and Steve Roger's eyes widened as they took in that Bruce was leaving Kitty's room in the morning. Bruce stared at the two for several seconds, trying to think of a good excuse. He decided to just look down and continue heading to elevator, leaving Tony and Steve on the sixth floor.