Chapter 2

Who do I find when I walk into music class the next morning than Bumper the Bitch?

I strut up to him as he scribbles on the whiteboard. "Aw, short shit, you're in a freshman class. Did you get lost again?"

He starts and jumps around. His face scrunches. "Oh god, it's you." I stick my hands on my hips. "Yeh, it's me. Who were you expecting, the muffin man?"

He nods. "Yes. I receive muffins from him every morning. One of the benefits of being a teacher's aid."

"Teacher's aid? Really? You can do that with your IQ?" I say, shocked. He smirks. "Oh, whatever. It's music class, and what you gotta remember is that when it comes to music, I'm a genius! I lead the Treble Makers! I have the solos! I know what I'm doing!" He glances at the clock. "Oh and, class started two minutes ago, so I'm gonna need you to sit your giant ass down in a chair. Maybe two if that's the only way you're gonna fit."

I stick my tongue out at him but sit down as the professor enters the room. He writes his name on the board next to Bumper's, who smirks wickedly. Poor weak freshmen, he's probably thinkin. We'll see who gets the last laugh.

Professor Sandaz? Sanchez? Sanhas? I can't read his handwriting, but the name doesn't really matter. He looks like the type to sleep with a student to give them better grades.

"All right class, today we'll be singing as high and as low as you can," he rumbles. "In this class we use music to communicate everything. You may sing your answers, use Morse code on a xylophone, anything you like, so long as it's musical. Questions?"

Everyone is silent, but as he keeps singing instructions a few nervous-looking students collect their things and step out the door. "Wusses," I mutter between coughs.

Bumper glares at me, and I roll my eyes. I would drop the class if I didn't like music so much, but this little shit needs to learn a lesson.

After class, I'm packing up when Bumper passes by and slaps my ass. "Watch it, Fatty. I'm in charge here."

I stand straight up and panic. "SEXUAL HARASSMENT!" I scream. "SEXUAL HARASSMENT BY THE TEACHER'S AID! PROFESSOR, YOUR TA IS TOUCHING ME!"

The professor walks over and glances disinterestedly at us both. "Bumper, you can do better. Don't waste your time here." He drops his arm around Bumper's shoulders, and his TA returns the favor.

I grit my teeth. The teacher is on Bumper's side. Fucking wonderful.

I grab my bag and stomp out of the classroom. At the door, I turn and glance at the professor. "Gay pedophilia won't make people like you," I tell him cheerfully.

~~~~~~~~later~~~~~~~~~

The first Bellas rehearsal was a disaster. I almost wish Aubrey had thrown up again, because it might have been better. And cardio? Really? I will not be doing any cardio. Horizontal running, that's what I can do for those bitches.

I hit mid-campus and look around. Where's my dorm anyway? I turn in almost a full circle before I spot something ugly and freeze.

Bumper's sittin by the fountain, drumming on his shoes with that Indian kid and the little ho with the fro. Normally I'd sass him, but after all that dancing I just don't have the energy.

I turn around and start walking. Hopefully he won't spot me, but it's hard to miss all this gorgeous. The courtyard's a bit full, so I keep hope alive.

No such luck. "Hey, Fat Amy! Look who showed up!"

I groan and turn around. Bumper runs up and lands sharply in front of me, almost on my toes. "I hope you know that after that little stunt you pulled, the professor..."

Oh boy, here it comes. "Oh, whatever. I'm banned from class, and I'm in trouble, and blah blah blah. Save it for someone who gives a damn."

I turn back around and keep heading for my dorm. At least I think it's my dorm. It might be nowhere.

He catches up and grabs my shoulder. "Actually, he liked your sass. As annoying as you are, he wants to keep you around. So show up tomorrow." He smiles quickly and pats my hand before walking away.

I stare after him, confused. "So that's it? You're just going to be nice now?" He looks bewildered. "Hell no, fatass. I'm just sending the message."

I roll my eyes. "Whatever. See you tomorrow, short shit."

Somehow I figure out where my dorm is. I knew it all along, I tell myself. Bullshit. I'm horrible at directions.

My phone buzzes, and I pull it out. A text from Beca.

And one from Bumper.

Well that's annoying.