Workout, Kind of!

This stupid cell isn't really big enough to do any real exercise but I found that if I propped the nasty thing I slept on against the wall I at least had something to hit. Each time my fist came in contact with the mattress my anger for being locked up for a crime I didn't or would never do seemed to help. Letting my anger out of that uncomfortable thing was actually helping me with the darkness I had taken from Lissa and believe me because of me being in here and the courts not listening to a word she had to say there was a lot of darkness. It didn't help that she was using a lot of spirit, trying to talk to me through dreams. I hit it a few more times because of 'loves fades, mine has', but when I came into contact with that in my head I heard a snap and then the pain. But the physical pain was so much easier to deal with than the emotional. And being the person I am I would never allow these stupid guards who taunted me with doughnuts see me shed one single tear.

I don't know how long I had been hitting the mattress and really didn't care. My hand was now swollen and was bleeding but I kept hitting. The next punch would be because of the nasty food they served me each day. To say I have lost some weight was kind of a stupid to say if you didn't look at me. My curves were starting to disappear, replaced with the visible bone of my hips. I was looking a lot more like a Moroi than a strong, opinionated Dhampir. I choked down most of my meals even the ones that had visible mold, but I had a strong stomach so at least I never threw it back up. But there were times I just didn't eat because what was served to me didn't resemble any food I had ever seen before.

I paused my 'workout' when I heard yelling from the entrance, it sounded like Lissa was trying again to come see me and this time she was pissed off. I have never heard those words come out of her mouth in all the time I have known her. She wasn't alone either, I could hear Christian and Adrian yelling with her. It took about ten minutes for my friends to get the picture that they wouldn't be allowed to visit me and the yelling stopped. I would have loved to see Lissa, maybe even get her to sneak in doughnuts for me. God how I missed my doughnuts.

Maybe with the sight of me she would throw an even bigger fit and with Adrian being the nephew of the Moroi I supposedly murdered could get me some actual food. At least the water was good. Always bottled and fresh. Once in a great while one of the guards would give me his sandwich. Mikhail voiced to me that he believed I could never do an act as killing the Queen and when the backs of the other guards were turned he would slip me a sandwich he had hidden in his coat.

I decided that my 'workout' was done and replace the mattress to its original spot. I decided it was time for me to visit Lissa and take the darkness she had voiced today away from her. I slipped into her head and was shocked. She was in her living room talking with Christain, Adrian, my mom and Dimitri. Adrian was telling them that in the last dream we had he could see I was wasting away.

"Why isn't she eating?" Lissa asked and I could feel the worry she had for me. She thought that maybe I had given up and was starving myself to death. It wasn't a bad idea but anyone who knew me knew I would never go down without a fight. Was I depressed hell yeah but suicide was a weak persons way out and I might show weakness with a certain Russian God but not when it came to my life.

"Oh she's eating. She even eats the moldy food they serve her. She doesn't want us to worry about her but she wants us to know if she doesn't make it to her hearing it wasn't because she gave up." I had told Adrian not to tell them about the lack of food well at least eatable food, I did tell him to tell them the rest. I would go down with a fight.

"Can't we make a complaint to someone?" Christian asked. Ahh, he cared. I knew it! I always knew he loved fighting with me. Our nasty comments were just how we got along. If I had to describe us I'd say we were siblings that got on each other's nerves so bad that it was easier to just be semi civil to each other.

"Maybe I can get some food and bring it down. The guards trust me." Dimitri spoke and his words wrapped around me caressing me with such a strong reactions that I wanted to cry. Adrian must have seen something because he was off his seat staring into Lissa's eyes.

"Rose it's not polite to eavesdrop." He winked and sat down.

"What. Rose is here. Now?" my mother said. To say I was floored by the raw concern coming out of her mouth was an understatement. She looked scared for me even worried about me. Her guardian mask was gone and she looked like she had been crying recently.

"Yeah. When Belikov said something about feeding her Lissa's aurora got all dark. And only one person I know has that color aurora and that's Rose." He turned to look at Dimitri and said, "If you haven't gotten the clue that really pissed her off. So I don't suggest you go down there. I'm willing to bet she'd rather starve than have your company."

"Adrain why are you being like this." Lissa whined. As for me I knew, he knew I loved Dimitri with everything I had in me and Dimitri just threw it away like yesterdays newspaper. Adrian cared too much about me and as much as I loved him I just couldn't give my heart to him.

"Because cradle robber there has done everything in his power to make sure that Rose's love was nothing more than trash. You have no clue what you've done to her do you?" Adrian said with bitterness. I wish I could tell him to stop that it wasn't worth his breathe because nothing I said was worth it to Dimitri why would his words penetrate.

I slipped out of Lissa's head not wanting to know where that conversation was going. Dimitri had his mask on but his eyes were screaming hatred. Dimitri obviously knew now that Adrain knew everything.