AOTC – The Real Story
Spoilers: For Attack of the Clones
Disclaimer: All recognisable characters, locations and other elements remain the property of their respective copyright holders. This work is not for profit.
Summary: Anakin tells Padme how he feels. (This chapter disregards the events of chapter one).
A/N: I think this makes a lot more sense than what happened in the film. I should mention that my Obi-Wan bias may be showing just a tiny bit in this one ;)
E-mail to George Lucas
Dear Mr Lucas
I must inform you that certain information has recently come to light that throws doubt on the accuracy of parts of your docudrama 'The Attack of the Clones'.
Researchers in the Deep Space Archive Service have uncovered a security hologram from the guest suite assigned to the senator from Naboo when she was visiting Coruscant. I have attached a copy and include a transcript below:
Anakin Skywalker (pacing about sulkily): Don't get me wrong; Obi-Wan is a great mentor. As wise as Master Yoda and as powerful as Master Windu.
Senator Padme Amidala: Mmmm yes, and he's kinda hot too.
Anakin (not listening): But he won't let me move on.
Padme: The way he jumped out of my window and grabbed hold of that courier droid was soooo impressive...
Anakin: I know why he does it - he's jealous of me.
Padme: I seriously doubt that.
Anakin: He is, he knows I'm the chosen one and I'm more powerful than him. I'm cuter too and I get to wear this cool leather tunic, while he's just got those boring old robes.
Padme: Er, Whinykins... I mean Anakin, I'm sure Obi-Wan is doing what's best for you.
Anakin (stamps his foot): No, he isn't. He's trying to stop me from being the coolest Jedi ever and it's just not fair!
Padme: Anakin, please calm down.
Anakin: I'm sorry Padme, I get a bit emotional sometimes but I don't want to upset you. You know I think you're really nice.
Padme: Well, thank you...
Anakin: Yeah, I really like you Padme, can I kiss you?
Padme: Er, look I'm flattered, Anakin, but you are a bit young for me.
Anakin: No I'm not, I'm really mature for my age. Look, I've started shaving and everything.
Padme: To be honest, I prefer older men. And that reminds me, I don't suppose you've got Obi-Wan's personal comm number, have you?
Anakin (stamps his foot again): No, no, no! I'm the chosen one, not him. You have to make out with me! Me me me!
Padme: Oh well, never mind, I'll get it from Master Windu.
She goes out, leaving Anakin on his own.
Anakin: That is SO unfair!
- End of recording.