Disclaimer: Don't own it! Just having fun with it!

Thank you to cubye4, lisadianemill, and vanilfrappe for taking the time to tell me your thoughts – I appreciate it more than you'll know.

This is in Bella's point of view.

Chapter two: Beginning

Last time:

With that, I felt my hair rush all around me, my love's arms slightly moving as he ran inside, I took what I knew now was my last breath, and plunged into the churning fire that was waiting for me.

I knew I was upstairs in Edward's room, I felt the leather underneath me; I knew that I had been bitten my Edward's brother Jasper by accident; I could hear doors closing and windows slamming along with hushed voices mixed with the heart-wrenching sound of Edward whimpering and gasping with grief, despair and panic.

I felt all of these things happen around me, but the only emotion that gripped me was fear. Fear of uncertainty. Fear of the unknown. The thing that scared me the most was my knowledge of "the change" from human to immortal.

I was not feeling true pain. I was numb, I couldn't move – totally limp as a rag doll. I could however open my eyes and move them. I think it has to do with the venom – Alice had told me that it acts an agent to keep "their meal" from fighting.

I was meant to be devoured, not changed.

Japer had not put enough venom in my system to begin the change immediately; he was consumed with the desire to take my blood instead.

I wondered then when the pain would begin. The searing pain that I remembered from Phoenix when James had put venom in me. Why was this taking so long? I now know what true dread mixed with anticipation feels like: knowing that absolute pain is approaching and that you cannot cringe away from its jaws.

It started then. I think I could only compare it to contractions when giving birth. It came in waves… tsunamis. The fire started at my neck and pushed its way through my veins outwards. I was being roasted from the inside-out. I knew that Edward was in pain too, and I had wanted this, but unfortunately not this way. I opened my eyes one last time, Edward was pacing the room – his eyes were wide, his fists clenched and he was grunting with every unnecessary exhalation. I'd promised myself that I was going to keep my burning body quiet and void from all sound of ache. He is worth that.

The pain began to stab me at different angles, becoming unpredictable. The flames unlocked my numbness. I could move. I turned onto my stomach immediately and tucked my legs under my belly. My chin was touching my knees; I shoved my hands over my mouth, pulled my elbows to my sides and turned my face towards the back of the couch. This was going to be painless for Edward.

"Bella?" Through the sound of my ragged breathing, I could hear Edward right above me, trying to get a glimpse of my face. He sounded lost. I didn't open my eyes to look, moving would provoke noise. "Bella, love, we don't know the extent of your damage, please be careful with yourself. Carlisle is coming to check on you as soon as they lock up the house."

He didn't know I was beginning to change. Did he not hear it in the thoughts of anyone else? If not, he's either blocking them or it means that they don't know either. The glass from the window had cut me up; they must be contributing the blood to that. And with me swallowing every scream, Edward didn't have much to go on as far my injuries were concerned. Our problems were much bigger than a few bits of harmless glass now.

"Edward, how is she?" Carlisle's voice floated to my ears. He would see right through this charade if I didn't focus. I scrunched my face up and started to count to ten slowly to keep from hyperventilating. I felt Edward leave my side.

"She was lying on her back after I set her down, and then all of a sudden, she was in a ball. She isn't speaking; she won't even look at me". His voice was breaking and wavering. I'm so sorry Edward.

Carlisle was quiet for a second. "Have you touched her?"

"No, I haven't dared. I didn't want to hurt her more, more than I already have in so many ways", I could tell that he was crumbling, "I wish now more than ever that I could hear her mind, so I could give her what she needs".

The venom must know where I was the weakest at that moment because I felt it attack my heart. I could feel its gentle tissue being burned. Keep breathing…

It was then I felt something touch the back of my neck, then move to my arms, then snap away.

"Oh my God", Carlisle muttered under his breath. I felt the couch move a bit as he knelt down beside it. His fingers probed my neck further, investigating. They found the wound on my right side, he pushed.

I took a sharp breath, and my hands sprang out from my mouth to my sides to grip the leather couch firmly.

"What did you find? Tell me!!" Edward was losing his patience. I felt the couch move again more violently, crashing against the wall, then Edward covered my clenched fists with his gently; "her hands are cold".

"Edward, she's changing. She was bitten", Carlisle said smoothly, taking his fingers away from my neck.

"WHAT?!!" Edward bellowed. He threw his arms around my waist and turned me over to see my neck. The sudden movement made my breathing go haywire – still no sound though, I'm still wining. I strained to gain control of my lungs as they pulsed with the lava inside; I turned my face against the back of the couch so my face wouldn't give away this internal struggle. This exposed my bitten neck to Edward's heightened line of vision.

I heard him stop breathing; he was touching my wound softly. Then I found myself in a sitting position on the couch with Edward kneeling in between my legs. He still had his arms around my waist, he was rocking me back and forth, his head buried in the other side of my neck; he had me so close against him. He began to sob into my neck uncontrollably, his breathing like that of a humming bird, his arms and hands rubbing up and down my sides, my back, my thighs, through my hair.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God, please, please, please… oh Isabella…" He was taking in as much of my scent as possible. I could hear him rasping so close to my ear. Everything inside of me wanted to scream for him, but I kept my mouth shut.

"Edward, I know that you are in pain, but you must remember that she is suffering as well. It's incredible that she hasn't cried out yet; I anticipate it coming. You need to be there for her and you can't if you're suffocating her", Carlisle said softly.

"My love, are you in pain? Do you hurt? Please let me see your eyes", Edward ignored Carlisle and put his hands on my cheeks, his face inches away. I would not speak, but how could I deny him my eyes? I slowly opened them.

I could tell that my vision was already changing, things in the room were a bit muddled, and I could see Edward clearly. There was something different. He was the same, but he was moving too, like there was a magnifying glass being shifted randomly all over his body and face. I blinked rapidly and opened my eyes wider to see if I could make out what was happening. I felt Edward's hands stop my head from moving as his stopped his breathing once again.

"Carlisle, look at her eyes." Edward's voice was steadier as he moved away slightly and Carlisle took his place in front of my face.

"They are still slightly brown but they're shifting. The colors are rolling, like marble. It has to be temporary. Maybe a gift? We will have to wait until the change is complete. I must look into my books and see if this has been documented before. Stay with her. If you notice anything else, alert me. Everyone is inside but Jasper who is with Alice, hunting. We will all be nearby when she wakes." With that, Carlisle went out the door and shut it behind him. I shut my eyes again, wanting to shut out the flames and the guilt.

Edward stroked my face lightly, "why aren't you screaming?" His hand accidentally grazed the bites on my neck, and I winced away, tucking into a ball once more. I felt Edward move onto the couch with me. He pulled his knees up under mine and put his arms around my waist, shielding me. I clutched at his jeans he was wearing and tried to keep the flames at bay by controlling my breathing. Edward caught on to what I was doing; he immediately snuck his hand up onto my heart, "breath with me". I concentrated on the rise and fall of his chest, and there slowly said my goodbyes to the world I had known as a human.