The Boy with Twenty Faces
Uchiha Sasuke the Incarnation of Moe!
"Uchiha-senpai are you okay?"
"What do you mean Hina-chan? I don't get what you are talking about," this would have been perfect if he only had a pair of cat ears and a tail, but no. It was still him but cuter! He had a slight tint of moe* in everything that he did, he was moe! "Hina-chan?" he was waving his hand in front of me with big, confused eyes.
"Look! Ice cream! Want some Hina-chan?" before I answered he was already dragging me by the arm as if I was his childhood wagon.
"Uchiha-senpai, wait!"
"No, hurry up!" he was already ordering a strawberry ice cream with lit up eyes and a childish grin smeared on his face.
What was going on here? Was this another cruel joke? Was this real? No, this was real, not even Uchiha Sasuke was such a good actor. This was definitely real. I gasped in anxiety and curled my hands to my chest protectively. I swear I was about to yell 'RAPE!' out of horrid surprise.
"Uchiha-senpai?" I called at him but in return I only heard a "Yes Hina-chan?"
"W-who do you like?" if this was Uchiha-senpai he would get mad, right?
"Stupid Hina-chan!" he said while lightly ruffling my hair, "Of course I like you."
"Uchiha-senpai are you okay?" I asked again, I was starting to get concerned, what was going on?
"Of course I am Hina-chan," he was the incarnation of moe, I was about to have a nosebleed, he was so cute I think I could like him. He was like Honey-senpai but cuter, "your acting weird Hina-chan, why do you keep asking that?"
"No nothing," Uchiha-senpai would never be this straightforward and especially not this cute, I had to do something maybe take him to his family and let them deal with it. I had done nothing wrong so I was not at fault, right? "Uchiha-senpai, do you have any family?"
"Yes of course! Itachi-nii!" he said with an Uzumaki-kun-ish grin.
The next thing I did was probably the boldest thing I had ever done in my whole life apart from that time I had entered that mangaka** contest –which I lost obviously –I fidgeted with my dress as I said it in the cutest voice I could possibly muster, "Could I meet him?"
"Why," he was whiney like a five year old and cute like a puppy.
"W-well if I'm going to be your g-girlfriend I should at least know your f-family," I felt the blush shade up into a cherry red, just the thought of this was making me nervous.
He didn't say anything for a while and when he did it was some incoherent thing about dating, in the end I convinced him to take me to his brother's house… in about half an hour of pettiness and complaining we arrived to his brother's house. I stood in front of the door of a huge penthouse, seriously a penthouse! Uchiha-senpai was standing, did I say standing, I meant clinging to my side like a lost child. I knocked on the door lightly, it was so light that I think only some guy with ninja senses (A/N pun unintended) would have heard, but by the time I was rising my palm to knock again I was already staring at this older version of Uchiha-senpai, a more intimidating version of course.
He was staring at me like I was some piece of rotten fish that was thrown at his brand new Ferrari. I think I looked at him in the same way, I don't think I liked him.
"Who are you?" he demanded harshly, he was probably a tsundere, one of those people that act all harsh but actually have a weak point, that weak point was, "Sasuke!" Uchiha-senpai was peaking from behind me his cheeks puffed up like two big pairs of apples. Cute!
"Itachi-nii, this is Hina-chan! I love her and we are getting married!" he said while taking hold of my shoulder, I gasped in surprise, when had it turned this way! I never said that Uchiha-senpai!
"I see, so this charming lady is Hinata," he gave me the look! The one guys use to inspect a girl, he looked at me all over, I hated it and now I know why Hanabi-chan said it was the worst.
"Uchiha-san… um, Uchiha-senpai he fainted," I didn't know what to say so I just blabbered stupid things like "Uh, Hercules, moe!"
"I see, so what you say is that Sasuke fainted and when he woke up he was moe!" his brow was furrowed like a bad done paper fan.
"Yes," I was sitting on a kotatsu a thing that was weird because it was still fall. I didn't bother to ask why he had taken his out so early, I just sat there my hands fidgeting on my lap and Uchiha-senpai still clinging to me like a newborn kitten did to its mother.
"And you say that he was acting like Honey-senpai?"
"Yes,"
"The one from Ouran High School Host Club?"
"Yes,"
"And you watch that anime?"
"Yes, but you're getting of subject Uchiha Itachi-san," this guy was getting on my nerves and it was hard to get on my nerves!
"I see, I never thought I would live to see a girl that could make Sasuke switch like this," he said in a weird, detective-ish way.
"Switch?" this other cat was not just playing with a ball of yarn but also with my tumbled up understanding, Uchiha Itachi-san kept tugging at my rational thinking. How could someone make another person act like a clumsy anime character? The answer was: they couldn't. Uchiha Sasuke just seemed to be an only exception.
"No stupid girl! Not that!" he said as if he had just heard all that had thought; "I meant make him come out!"
"…Come out? Who?" my brain was like a bowl of twisted noodles, my confusion could go no further.
"The other Sasuke…" he responded hesitantly while reaching to feel Uchiha-senpai's forehead.
I think I gasped in shy agitation. Other Sasuke? How could that be? What had triggered the change? In the end I was left with more answers than questions, of course that these answers weren't really good and I felt that if I asked Uchiha Itachi-san to explain in a more orthodox way then he would crumble me up like a sheet of wrinkled paper and toss me heartlessly into the trash can.
"Ne~ Itachi-nii can you please stop flirting with Hina- chan, I already told you that she is mine!" he whined and hugged my arm like he would hug his favorite teddy bear.
"Yes, yes. You can keep her Sasuke," he replied indifferently waving his hands in the air.
"Uchiha Itachi-san! H-how much will this last, is there a way to bring him b-back?" I was afraid of sounding offensive and neglecting but things couldn't stay like this.
"Well… most of the time this only last a couple of minutes, since when is he like this?"
"After he got mad at me… he just fainted and when he woke up he was l-like t-this," I was getting a bit exhilarated and I am sure that my cheeks where apple red and hot as burnt chicken.
"And why did he get mad at you?" he seemed to be very interested in this as if he wanted to know who was the 'heartbreaker' who had gotten his lovely porcelain doll of a brother into this ditzy state.
I hesitated for a few seconds. I didn't want to tell Uchiha Itachi-san about that horrid moment! It was embarrassing enough for me to have actually asked such a thing and now to say it was practically insane! I would not tell him, I would take this secret to my grave. It was so embarrassing that I am sure I would have fainted had not Uchiha-senpai been there to cling to me and prevent me from tilting.
"So~ why did Sasuke get mad?" he was poking at my brain with his calm, velvety words that made me even more nervous.
No. No. No! I won't tell you! No. "B-because I a-asked him w-who h-he l-l-liked!" that was it, I was sure I was doomed, Uchiha Itachi-san would kill me! Curse my weakness and terrible willpower!
He just sat there taking in the words I had clumsily stuttered and processing them slowly in his brain, after a few seconds of deep thought he yelled the worst profanities that you could have ever imagined all so fast that no normal human could have actually thought that they were actually words, but more like an irritating buzz. But why? I don't know any reason as to why he would bet so angry and especially with a person he just met. Maybe I had crossed a line in asking Uchiha-senpai that, maybe that phrase was some sort of switch that would turn on this other Uchiha-senpai.
"Don't say that to Hinata! I love her and she loves me so you have to love her to and we will all love each other!" squealed Uchiha-senpai in the cutest possible way. I could even consider making him the ruler of the Earth just because he was cute. Too cute, I think that if he would have had a bunny suit and a carrot he would have made the whole world have a mass nosebleed.
Uchiha Itachi-san was staring at Uchiha-senpai with wide eyes, the type of wide eyes that you get when your ice cream falls to the ground. Then he walked to Uchiha-senpai and smacked him hard on the head, this was terribly sadistic. I squeaked like a mouse and shuddered to the floor next to Uchiha-senpai in turmoil while trying to pat him awkwardly on the head, I couldn't help think that he was a fallen kitten that desperately needed a warm bath, I think I was about to give him some steamy, warm milk out of pure maternal instinct.
"Leave him," Uchiha Itachi said coolly, how could he be so worriless about this? He had just hit his brother! Was this normal for them? I replayed this image about twenty times before I actually processed what Uchiha Itachi-san had done. Uchiha-senpai as in Uchiha Sasuke was just lying there his expressions looking flustered by the intense pain in his nape, he twisted and turned like a burning piece of plastic, every time making a different grimace, each sweeter that the other.
The prolonged silence was even more uncomfortable that the one that I shared with Uchiha-senpai and Uchiha-senpai's raspy breathing didn't make it easier. A few more hell-hole minutes passed before Uchiha-senpai started to rumble on the floor (Uchiha Itachi-san hadn't even bothered to carry him to the couch) as if he was fetus in the womb.
"Uchiha-senpai!" I gasped while tugging at my hair in desperation.
"Shut up will you," I heard the grumble of annoyance coming from the nearby couch in which Uchiha Itachi-san's big –pardon the word –ass was plastered like a gum on concrete. I gave him a deadly glare that could easily have been mistaken for a cute grimace.
I turned alarmed at Uchiha-senpai when I heard a gasp of pain of immeasurable decibels. "H-Hinata~ give me ramen!" was this the real Uchiha-senpai or was he still the moe Uchiha-senpai? He rolled a few more times on the fuzzy rug and then he just sat bolt upright like a cliché anime where the guy wakes up from a bad dream.
"R-ramen! Uchiha Itachi-san give him ramen!" I yelled in a stage of idiocy.
"Uugh~!" Uchiha-senpai was rubbing his head like a hungry zombie that was in desperate need for virgin flesh.
"Ramen with yakisoba and mayonnaise! Maid, maid! Kame Hame Ha!" I was in a crazed state, flapping my arms all over the place in deep turmoil. What if Uchiha Itachi-san had caused a serious damage and he would never go back to his original state.
"Hyuga Hinata-san please calm down," mumbled the weird guy who still had his hindquarters stuck to the couch –AKA Uchiha Itachi-san –he even had a would-be-sexy-in-another-situation pose where he had his legs over the side of the couch like a hot manga character.
I froze in my spot, my hands in the air like long octopus arms that had been bathed in liquid nitrogen, "But…"
Uchiha Itachi-san shushed hurriedly, "Just look."
I turned my attention to Uchiha-senpai and saw him rubbing his forehead tiredly. He looked like a stressed **mangaka that was approaching his deadline and was in desperate need for coffee. I crawled to where he was and looked at him straight I the eye, I still didn't know if this was the normal Uchiha-senpai but if he wasn't he would definitely trample me to floor like in those cliché ***shoujo manga's
He scowled at me through his heavenly curtain if hair. I blushed out of relief. The moe Uchiha-senpai would not even be able to scowl; this was our Uchiha-senpai! I smiled in delight and finally lowered my hands slowly to my lap. I fidgeted with my skirt not really knowing what to do next. He kept looking at me but he was just staring into the distance as if actually looking beyond what was real perception.
"Hi," he said with a cocky grin.
"H-hello," I stuttered idiotically, still staring down into my lap as if it was more interesting than what stood before me.
He looked around, confusion plastered on his face like cheap one dollar lipstick. I went apple red when I realized that he was actually smiling at me. Smiling. That was something new coming from Uchiha Sasuke. It wasn't the fact that he was smiling that made me blush; it was more or less the fact that he was smiling so broadly. It was him that was for sure but he was still smiling. As if suddenly coming to the recognition that he had done something that the universe had not commanded he turned to glare at Uchiha Itachi-san like he would glare at a bubbling platter of broth with a pig head wobbling up and down inside it.
"What did you do to her?" he scowled a question. I gasped and started wiggling my hands in front of myself dismissively but my words wouldn't come out.
"Why not ask her," he was looking at me with implying eyes, what was he implying? Was he indicating that WE had done something! I blushed even more at this thought and quickly pushed it away as if it was a cloud that I was dissolving with my palm, flapping energetically in the air.
Uchiha-senpai turned to me; I widened my eyes and stopped flapping my hands in the air almost instantaneously. "Nothing happened Uchiha-senpai!" he stared at me incredulously, he looked like a skeptical guy who had just seen a terribly good magic trick, he didn't believe me.
I kept myself locked into his gaze despite how much I wanted to turn around and stare once again at something much less interesting. He still seemed like he didn't believe me so I repeated this many times until he finally sighed out of relief. "Good," he said to no one in particular.
"Get a room!"
I went so red that I swear I looked like a piece of watermelon on summer, warm and red. I didn't turn to see Uchiha-senpai but I could feel the heat emanating from him, he had his head bowed way to low so that it looked like it was one with his neck. I could not see his face but his nape was red as a cherry.
I knew he was the normal Uchiha-senpai but know I had gotten used to the idea that he was adorable. He really was cute and not in the moe way. He just generated a feeling of innocence that I had never seen there before. I was still gazing into my hands, feeling nervous by the dense atmosphere.
"Ne, Hinata I think we should leave," Uchiha-senpai said while standing up slowly. He extended his hand for me to get up; I took it anxiously and stood up next to him, our arms touching by the closeness.
"Y-yes I think we should get going," I said while wiggling my hand out of his grip awkwardly.
"What? You're not staying for lunch?" Uchiha Itachi-san said in a sing song voice that to say the truth was mere irritating. I could feel my vein pop on my temple. He smirked mockingly, "Today I'm making curry!" C-curry! It was at that moment that I had noticed how hungry I actually was. Curry! It was one of my favorite foods. Curry, I could almost smell the spices in my mind and I pictured myself swimming in the creamy seasonings.
"No~!" Uchiha-senpai said forcefully, he didn't seem very fond of Uchiha Itachi-san. In fact he seemed as fond of his brother as a cat would be fond of a dog.
He took hold of my wrist pulled me gently to the door. I was about to say 'wait I want curry!' but by the time he was taking of his indoor slippers and placing on his shiny converse I already found myself being rummaged out of my own slippers –that Uchiha Itachi-san had lent me –by Uchiha-senpai. He grabbed my sandals in one hand and pulled me out of the door barefoot. Barefoot!
Uchiha-senpai was impulsive. More impulsive than I had thought he was. I was still dying from hunger, I felt my intestines toss and turn like a stoned guy with insomnia. Uchiha-senpai and I kept walking next to each other for a few minutes. The air was not tense; it was more of a silent treaty. We both glanced from the corner of our eyes every two of three minutes. We went like this for some more until Uchiha-senpai came to a halt (in which I hastily slipped my sandals on), he was trembling and his fists where curled into big tight balls the size of grapefruits.
"D-did I do anything to you?" he seemed to have taken these words very seriously so I figured I ought not to tell him about that embarrassing crush-slash-hug to death that he had given upon me to receive.
I looked at him with my pale gray eyes and responded in the most honest voice I could muster, "No."
He seemed to relax a bit and kept on walking at a steady pace. I even think that he was slowing down for my sake. Uchiha-senpai was not always groaning or muttered beyond comprehension, he was also a guy with some switch for moe on. I could almost picture a big switch carved into his naked backwith the words stoic on and moe on printed in bold black letters. I wish there was just some intermediate point where he was not too stoic or too moe. But yet again Uchiha-senpai's switch modes where a new thing and perhaps this was what I had wanted all along. To not lead a normal life. It reminded me a lot of those weird light novels about an eccentric girl… what was her name, Haruhi or something like that. She was desperate to lead a non-normal life, I was deep down desperate to lead a non-normal life and Uchiha-senpai was my Haruhi and I was Kyon and Uchiha-senpai would make sure to make each day fun and worriless… right? I still wasn't sure why Uchiha-senpai had asked me to go out with him but it wouldn't hurt to see him switch a couple more times… or that was what I thought at the time.
"Don't worry you were just fine," this time I was honest, he was clingy and stoic but he did just fine, for whatever ulterior motive he had he did it just fine.
My stomach grumbled. It destroyed the moment completely. He for once looked at me with amused eyes. "I guess this date hasn't worked very well has it?"
"…" I was in loss for words, I couldn't even speak in monosyllables, because Uchiha Sasuke had just smiled like a radiant sun and he had laughed at my clumsiness, Uchiha Sasuke the too much of a martyr to actually be able to slash by a grin had smiled, even for just a slight second I had caught it and I had wished I had had a camera on me.
He returned to his original self and led me to a nearby crepe stand. I wanted to ask him for reasons. I wanted to know more about his switch. When had it started? What where these switch modes? Uchiha Itachi-san had not even bothered to explain and to tell the truth I wouldn't have wanted to ask him.
He handed me a vanilla crepe with a lot of cream on it, I took a gargantuan bite off it and chuckled out of delight. Finally I mustered the willpower to ask him, "Uchiha-senpai, w-what happened when y-you f-f-fainted!"
He looked at me in bewilderment; he even had whip cream on his cheek. "Didn't Itachi nii-san tell you?"
"N-no."
He sighed like a tired idol after a long concert, "Well, since I was about thirteen I developed these switch modes," he said in hesitantly between chews.
"Switch? That's what Uchiha Itachi-san told me."
"Yeah, well it happens when I get big surge of… emotion, for example if I get nervous or if I overwork my body," I was gawking at him, this was the most I had even heard him talk and his voice was melodious like a sweet and slow violin symphony even if his words where actually a serious matter.
"But why did you go like that when I asked you w-wh… that question?" I didn't want to recall the embarrassing question. I am such a klutzy, coward moron!
"Well you usually get nervous when you are with the girl you like don't you? And if she suddenly comes out with such a stupid question don't 'ya get more nervous?"
"Yeah, but I'm not the girl you like so why would you?" I was blushing hardly at just thinking that what Uchiha-senpai had said was true. But it wasn't, right?
"God, you sure are dense! I already told you I wasn't joking about this," he ruffled his hair with his free hand and grimaced at the sun in a flashy way. I goggled at his beauty.
"Cute," I said without thinking. When I had come to the realization of what I had said I widened my eyes like big UFO saucers.
He turned around abruptly and spit out a whip creamy, "What!"
"Sorry, it's just that I was… I didn't realize, sorry," I bowed my head, so flustered that I swore never to look at Uchiha-senpai in the eye again.
"You're cute too," he responded, he was calm and cool like a big bucket of ice cubes.
I smiled at him, it was a wide, sunshine smile and for the first time I felt like I resembled my name. I don't know why but I thought for one moment that I wouldn't be so sad if this wasn't a prank.
"Uchiha-senpai I think we should go home,"
"Yeah, I think so too, it's been too much drama for a day, don't 'ya think?" he said with a smirk-like smile. I don't know if say that it was a smirk or a smile because I just couldn't bring myself to decide. Weird. "Come, I'll walk you home."
This was too embarrassing. "Ah, no that's okay, I can go home by myself, I live nearby," I was waving my hands in that odd manner again; I looked like a mother with too many things to do.
"Don't worry, that's my job. After all I am your date." He said while shoving his hands in his pockets, making sure to make a very BIG emphasis in the AM.
We walked nervously for a few minutes until I arrived at the train station, "Well I think I'll see you around."
"Yes," I said while bowing slightly.
"Don't bow to your date!" he said in an undertone, he looked like an embarrassed teenager who had just seen his mom pick him up from school with her bath robe and flip flops.
"Yes!" I said immediately straightening up like a soldier standing next to his general.
"Just one thing," he called to me from afar, the sun that was peeking from the open stairways shining on his ebony hair and making him radiate some sort of glow that seemed out of this world, if you compared him to Edward Cullen I think Uchiha-senpai would have won for sure.
I turned slowly, making my hair shimmer by the sudden surge of sun light. "Yes?"
"Next time you can call me Sasuke." With that he turned and started walking to the opposite direction.
I waited for some minutes and got on the train, arrived home about half an hour later ready to surrender to some more comfortable clothes and a big bowl of Papa's sushi. But next time I would try to say it, maybe next time I would be able to say "Sasuke-senpai."
*Moe: most of you know (I hope) but it is like the Japanese term for turn on, not necessarily in a pervy way, but more like cute and clumsy turn on!
**Mangaka: manga artist.
***Shoujo manga: again most of you know already but in case of doubt it is manga targeted mainly at girls, it contains really sappy romance and there are often many clichés in it.
A/N: So this chapter is actually pretty slow in romance but big in moe and bishie's! Talking of bishie's this bishie KOOGY-san appeared on episode 21 of Bakuman and I couldn't help compare his look to Sasuke-san… just that KOOGY-san is a bit eccentric, not that Sasuke-san isn't. Is he eccentric? I won't say more or else I will end up spoiling the next chapter if I already didn't, I mean there are very keen readers out there). N…! that's all I will say!
I know I should say this in the beginning but I just think that it ruins the whole presentation thing so:
I DO NOT own Naruto or any of the characters used in this story. To be honest I wouldn't like to own it anyway, fan fiction is way better, that way I can ruin the story however I want and only a minimum amount of people would know or care (laughs!) but if Kishimoto Masashi-sensei ruins it the whole world would hate him, don't you think. Well I think that. Well I wouldn't hate him but many would or already do (let's hope not though).