A/N: So you guys broke me down, and this one-shot has officially turned into a two-shot. I just couldn't resist tying up this little storyline, (and Hidge was being a pain in my ass about it, lol). Hope you enjoy Chapter 2, please leave me a review at the end! (Regardless of whether you liked it or not, criticisms are welcome!) Enjoy!

Disclaimer: If I owned Grey's Anatomy, this would have happened by now.

Jackson sat in a corner of the attendings lounge, numbly chewing on a muffin. He kept replaying the events of the night before in his head, still trying to wrap his head around the fact that he'd let Alex Karev, of all people, talk him into doing something so stupid.

He hadn't been sure what April's reaction would be, but he definitely had not been expecting that.

His head flicked up to see the pediatric surgeon in question enter the room and begin rummaging through the fridge. He pulled out a carton of orange juice that Jackson knew to belong to Yang and took several large gulps straight from the spout before he collapsed on the sofa next to Jackson.

"Freakin' interns... Wilson won't stop bitching to me about wanting to do procedures. Said that now that Edwards is on Kepner's service, she's done tons of procedures just this morning, and why doesn't Jo get to do procedures all of the time? They're grunts! Nobodies! Bottom of the surgical food chain!" Alex complained.

Jackson raised his eyebrows and took another bite of his muffin.

Alex took another swig and looked over at the Plastics attending curiously. "So dude, what happened after you left last night?"

Jackson groaned inwardly. April Kepner was not a topic he was willing to breach with Karev again. "None of your business, dude."

"Aw, come on, you seemed pretty confident when you left last night," Alex prodded before downing the rest the of orange juice.

Jackson determinedly turned his head away from his colleague, picked up a medical journal from the coffee table and began to flip through the pages.

Karev let out a final chuckle. "Fine, suit yourself."

The door of the attendings lounge flew open and Meredith's belly preceded her into the room, quickly followed by Cristina.

"Hey, Evil Spawn, do you mind?" Cristina said, snatching her now empty carton of orange juice out of Karev's grasp.

Jackson ignored his bickering friends and stared at Meredith instead. His eyes were drawn to the basketball under her scrub top: evidence that Zola would soon have a baby brother.

April wanted kids. Jackson had never really thought about it, if he was being honest with himself, until a few months ago when April had thought she was pregnant. He had been ready to be a dad then, not to just any kid but to their kid. He'd meant it when he said that he was in. They would make amazing parents, April especially. He knew his mother desperately wanted him to settle down and give her some grandchildren, and she loved April. It seemed like a no brainer to him. Jackson pushed himself up from his chair.

"I should get back to work," he said.

April was having a hell of a morning. She hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, and of course, with Hunt's new rule of rotating interns, Stephanie Edwards was on her service for the next few weeks. April couldn't quite look the woman in the eye; she felt too guilty, especially because she knew that Edwards had little to no idea of her and Jackson's history together.

So, April had suggested that Edwards take care of almost all of the procedures that morning. It kept her eyes on her patients and away from April, plus it earned her attendings points with the residents. She'd overheard Jo Wilson complaining to Edwards that Alex had barely let her touch a patient.

Edwards was fairly competent, as interns go, and the fact that she was doing April's work gave the attending a lot of time to ponder the events of the night before. She leaned heavily on the counter of the nurses' station.

Jackson had completely blindsided her with his declaration. Sure, she had hoped and dreamed that someday he would say those words to her, but she had never believed that it would actually happen. When it did, she hadn't know what to do with herself.

In retrospect, she felt embarrassed by her reaction, or rather, lack thereof. Jackson had been staring expectantly at her, and she had frozen.

April let her thoughts run over their one-sided exchange from last night.

"I think I'm in love with you."

April's world came to a stop with those seven little words. Hadn't she hoped that those exact words would come out of his mouth? Hadn't she been hoping for weeks, until she met Matthew? Now that it had happened, she wasn't sure what to do. She opened her mouth to speak, but words wouldn't come out.

Jackson Avery was in love with her?

She almost wanted to laugh out loud. This must be her punishment from Jesus. If she had never had sex with Jackson in the first place, they would still be best friends and she could have lived happily ever after with Matthew. Her life would be perfect. But now, she was stuck with an ex-boyfriend who hated her and a guy who didn't tell her he loved her until it was too late.

Jackson was still staring at her intensely. She knew he was expecting her to say something back. Maybe he was expecting her to jump into his arms and they would fall back into her apartment and make up for lost time.

April mentally shook herself. Now was definitely not the time to be having impure thoughts. Didn't need to give God another reason to punish her.

She tried to speak again but her mouth had gone dry as a bone and no sound escaped her lips. Jackson raised an eyebrow at her.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly, taking a small step toward her. The increase in proximity made her palms sweat. His body was only inches away from hers; she could feel the heat coming from his skin.

Her body shivered involuntarily. There was no way she could think clearly with him so close to her. Everything about him made her want to pull him in and lock the door behind them.

April let out a breath and took a tiny step backwards. "I'm... I'm okay," she whispered.

Who was she kidding? She was far from okay. Hey eyes flew up to meet Jackson's. He didn't look very reassured. His pale blue-green eyes pierced hers; she felt sure that he could see right in to her very soul.

He broke eye contact and fidgeted awkwardly. "Well... I, uh... I just wanted you to know that. Have a good night, April." For a moment, April thought that he was about to lean in and kiss her, before he turned on his heel and walked away. Had she imagined it?

April's heart was begging for her to call out to him, to stop him from walking away from her. Her head, on the other hand, was still trying to make sense of what had just happened. She remained motionless in the doorway.

Jackson Avery was in love with her.

"Dr. Kepner? Dr. Kepner?"

April jolted out of her trance as if she'd been given an electric shock. Edwards was staring at her with a concerned look on her face. "Are you okay?" the intern asked.

Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she stood up straight and smoothed out her scrub top. "Um, yeah, I'm fine. How's the pit doing?"

Edwards beamed. "Beds two, three and six have been discharged, four and seven were admitted and there's no one in the waiting room."

April smiled at the younger woman, who was obviously pleased with herself. She had the makings of a great trauma surgeon, and April couldn't wait to see how she'd fare in the fourth year trauma certification skills lab. It had certainly been an eye opener for her.

"What do you want me to do now?" Stephanie asked eagerly.

"Well, if there's one thing I've learned about the ER in the past few years, it's that it is never quiet for long. Take a break, get some sleep and some food before all hell breaks loose down here." April watched as the black haired girl headed towards the cafeteria before she walked around to the other side of the counter and sank into a chair. She was sure that once the woman found out about her and Jackson, she was a lot less likely to think that April walked on water.

She was thankful for the fact that Jackson was held up all day in the conference room, discussing Dr. Bailey's situation with Legal. Word had traveled quickly throughout the hospital that the attending who struck fear into the hearts of residents was under investigation from the Centre for Disease Control. Dr. Bailey was an incredible surgeon, and April hated to think that her job could be in jeopardy. She'd been in a similar situation herself when she was a resident, and it had resulted in her getting fired. The memory haunted April to this day. All the same, she was glad that it was limiting the amount of time where she and Jackson could run into each other. They'd already had a few encounters, but she had rushed off before he had a chance to say anything.

She was also sort of glad that Matthew would be taking some time off work until his injuries were fully healed. She didn't know if she could handle a conversation with him after last night, because she didn't know what she wanted anymore.

Matthew was the perfect guy for her. He was the type of guy that she fantasized about as a teenager, and she knew that if she had met him before she'd taken her Boards, they would still be together to this day. Maybe they'd even be talking about marriage. She could easily see herself spending the rest of her life by his side.

But Jackson... Jackson was different. He was everything that Matthew wasn't, in the best way possible. He had taken her life and turned it upside down, made her question everything she'd ever believed in, and a part of her loved that about him. If Matthew was the calm and steady train ride at the amusement park then Jackson was the roller coaster that twisted and turned through all of the ups and downs, but you never wanted to get off.

April had never been much of a roller coaster person. She wasn't a risk taker, she chose the safe option every time. The safe option here would give her Matthew, if he forgave her, which she knew he would. Her head screamed at her to take the safe route. It had worked out so well in the past for her; she had been happy, but this time, something was different. This time, her heart firmly disagreed with her head.

Her heart refused to give up on Jackson. She'd never realized exactly how he felt about her, but it had been clear, looking in his eyes last night. They would have a tumultuous relationship, full of highs and lows, but they would love each other more than April thought was possible. They would have passion at a level that her and Matthew would probably never be able to achieve.

How did you turn down that kind of love?

Stephanie Edwards opened the door to another on-call room. No Jackson. She had been looking for the plastic surgeon ever since Dr. Kepner had told her to go take a break, but had thus far been unsuccessful. She'd checked almost every on-call room on the surgical floor, the conference room where Dr. Bailey was sequestered and the attendings lounge but he was nowhere to be found.

She was proud of her boyfriend for stepping up in his new role in the hospital, but at the same time, his new responsibilities were severely cutting down on "Stackson" time, as Jo called it.

Stephanie walked up to the last on-call room on the floor. If he wasn't in here, she would text him.

Jackson abruptly woke to someone barging into the room he was sleeping in and turning on the light. Groggily, he sat up and blinked as his eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness of the room.

"What the h-" he muttered as the intruder sat down on his bed.

"Hey, sorry, I just wanted to come visit since I'm on a quick break. I'm in the pit with Kepner and things are pretty slow down there today," Stephanie said, dropping a quick kiss on Jackson's lips. Shit.

Stephanie was working with April? "Oh, how's that going?" he asked casually, stretching his arms as he spoke.

"Great! She's letting me do all sorts of procedures, which, no offense, you never did-"

"Plastics is a delicate art," Jackson cut in, "I'm not about to let an intern paint a masterpiece when she's only learned to finger paint."

Stephanie waved her hand. "Whatever. Anyways, it's great, but I miss you and Kepner doesn't seem like her usual self today, it's bumming me out."

"What's wrong? Is she okay?" he asked, desperately wanting to know how April was reacting to his confession. He realized he may have been just a little bit too forceful with his demand when he saw the confusion on Stephanie's face.

Stephanie slid backwards. "I'm sure she's fine, she's just not as perky as usual. Kind of off in her own little world all day. What's with the concern for Kepner? It's not like you guys are close."

Jackson bit back a sarcastic laugh. She didn't know the half of it.

It occurred to him that she should probably know the truth about his and April's history, especially where he still didn't know how the redhead was going to respond. Jackson sat up a little straighter.

"Actually, April and I are really close." He watched as Stephanie's eyebrows rose in surprise. "We haven't really been close lately, but we were best friends since intern year, especially after our friends Charles and Reed died in the hospital shooting."

Stephanie nodded slowly. The interns had heard the story of the shooting; there were no secrets at Grey Sloan Memorial. "But why did you stop best being friends?" she questioned.

Jackson shifted uncomfortably. "When we went to take our Boards in San Francisco, we, uh, ended up sleeping together. We always said it would be a one time thing, that each time it happened would be the last, but in the end, we couldn't stay away from each other. And then April thought she was pregnant, and I offered to marry her, but then she wasn't and things just kind of fell apart after that."

Stephanie sat in silence for a few moments before beginning to speak. "And you're still in love with her," she breathed. Jackson was shocked that she was taking this news so effortlessly. He wondered if he hadn't been as adept at hiding his feelings as he'd thought.

"I'm sor-" he tried to apologize, before she cut him off.

"It's cool. Seriously, now I have a chance to really throw myself into surgeries and I don't have time to wait around for someone who's in love with somebody else," she said as she advanced towards the door and turned the knob.

"Good luck, Jackson. And to be honest, plastics isn't really my thing."

Stephanie offered him a quick smile before she pulled open the door and left.

One down, one to go, Jackson thought to himself as he nodded off once again.

April held her cell phone in her hand, hovering her finger above the Call button. She had been sitting like this for quite a while now, and couldn't quite bring herself to dial Matthew's number. Not because she didn't want to end things with him, but because she didn't want to hurt him. Even though he was currently angry with her, she knew that he would take this hard.

She tried to tell herself to just do it already, get it over and done with. It was like ripping off a Band-Aid, and she knew she'd feel better as soon as it was over.

She glanced around, but no one was in sight. She was sitting in the tunnels on an abandoned gurney. Meredith had told her once that it was a peaceful place to be alone.

April took a deep breath and pressed the Call button. The phone rang several times before she heard his voice come on the line.

"Hello?"

April's mouth had gone dry. She swallowed hastily. "Matthew? It's April."

"Oh... hi."

"Um, how are you? How's the laceration?" She was stalling, and she knew it.

"It's fine, I guess. Look, April, I'm kind of busy right now. Can you call back later?"

He was definitely still mad at her. "Actually, I'm calling for a reason..." she trailed off. She didn't hear anything on the other line. He was waiting.

"The thing is, Matthew, I... I didn't tell you the whole story of how I lost my virginity."

He let out a huff of air. "Really, April, do we have to do this now? I can come to the hospital tomorrow and we can talk."

"No, it has to be now," she said. She couldn't start this conversation now and finish it tomorrow. It had to be taken care of now.

"I really wanted to wait until I was married," she began, "but I didn't. And I used to regret not waiting, but I don't anymore, because I truly think that the guy I had sex with is the man I'm going to end up with. And I'm sorry that it took me so long to figure it out, and that you got dragged along for the ride. I'm sure you're going to find a great girl someday and be very happy with her, but that girl is not me." She paused briefly before continuing." You're a great guy, Matthew, and you deserve to be with someone who can really love you, instead of someone who will be pining away for somebody else."

It took Matthew several seconds before he responded quietly. "Is there anything I can do to change your mind?"

April smiled sadly. "I'm afraid not. Some things you just can't change."

Matthew laughed into the phone. "Well, I guess I'll see you around then."

"Yeah, I'll see you around. Goodbye, Matthew."

"Goodbye, April."

She hung up the phone and sat motionless on the gurney for a few minutes. That had been hard, but not as hard she'd been anticipating.

Now that it was over, she felt exhausted. Her pager went off and for the first time, she scowled at an incoming trauma.

April jogged to the ER to find Stephanie Edwards pulling on a trauma gown. "What have we got?"

"Car versus pedestrian, 10 minutes out. 28 year old female with crush injuries, possibility of internal bleeding."

April waited for Stephanie to list off the other casualties but the intern didn't say anything else. "One person? Is that it?"

Edwards looked surprised. "Yeah."

"Okay, page Steve Mostow. He's a fifth year trauma resident and it's about time he took point on a case. He's very good, and he should be able to handle whatever comes through these doors. If it gets out of control, page me, and I want updates on the patient regardless." April began to walk away when Stephanie stopped her.

"You're not going to stay?"

April shook her head. "I'm going to catch some sleep."

April let herself into an on-call room, intent on taking a quick nap. She paused when she heard rustling coming from the bed and glanced over to see an achingly familiar pair of eyes focusing on her after being woken up.

"Oh, Jackson... I didn't know you were in here. Sorry," she said quickly, grabbing the door knob and attempting to flee the room before he had a chance to stop her. She felt a hand close around her wrist, pulling her back to sit on the bed.

"You've been avoiding me all day, April. If you're still freaking out, then just forget I said anything and we can pretend it never happened... though you should know that Stephanie the intern and I broke up," Jackson said softly.

Without warning, April burst into tears. She pulled her hand away from Jackson's and brought it to her face to cover the tears. Jackson sat awkwardly next to her for a moment before he reached out and wrapped one arm around her shoulders.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm sorry, let's just forget last night ever happened," he soothed. April sat up straighter.

"No," she sniffed. "No, let's not. I'm done with pretending that things haven't happened." She wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

"Then why are you crying?"

April laughed despite herself. "Because the timing of everything is off, Jackson. I was supposed to meet a nice guy, fall in love, get married and then have sex, but that's not what happened. You and I happened, and I don't ever want to forget about that."

Jackson pulled his arm back and shifted himself so he could look directly at her. It gave her the confidence to keep going.

"Matthew is a wonderful man. He really is. And I could see myself spending the rest of my life with him... if I'd met him before we went to San Francisco. He is absolutely perfect for the girl that I was back then. But I'm not that girl any more, Jackson." She wanted to touch him more than anything, but she restrained herself and kept talking.

"Matthew and I would have a steady, loving relationship. We'd get married, and have kids and grow old together, and I still want all of those things, but I want more than that now."

Jackson looked confused. April succumbed to her desires and reached out to stroke his cheek before voicing her earlier thoughts. "There's this train ride at the amusement park, you know, one that's meant for really young kids or really old people." She chuckled. "You think you want to go on the train, and when you do, it's pleasant and calming, there are no surprises and it's enjoyable for the most part, but it eventually gets boring."

She could tell from his eyes that Jackson was starting to see where she was going with this. She knew he'd hated it before when she used analogies for their relationship, but she had a feeling this one would be different.

"You can't help but want a little more than that little train ride, so you turn your attention to the huge, intimidating roller coaster that you've always wanted to try but never had the guts to actually get on. And when you do, it turns your world upside down. You can't see what's around the corner, you can barely think straight while you're flying around the twists and turns, and you're terrified almost the entire time, but as soon as it ends, you're already racing to the back of the line to do it all again. Because for the past few minutes of your life, you forgot about everything else in the world, including the train. And when you get around to riding that little train again, you realize that even the best train ride in the world could never measure up to how that roller coaster made you feel."

A smile was slowly beginning to spread across Jackson's face. "Let me get this straight... Am I the roller coaster?"

April nodded. "Yes, you are the roller coaster, and I never want to see another train again if it means that I get to be with you. You changed my life, Jackson, and I'll never be able to go back. So let's just go forward... together."

Jackson grinned. "Together."

A/N: So, not as much Alex in this chapter, but I think April's internal debate makes up for it! Thanks for reading and please review!