Fear

Lis lay in the pod and tried not to fret. It was hard. She was not asleep. She had sort of hoped that the medics would knock her out for this, but they hadn't. Chirurgeon and his staff had spoken of DNA recombinants and energy transfer protocols and she had tuned them all out. All she had heard from the explanation was that her hair would grow back eventually. All of that esoteric medical stuff had gone completely over her head. She was...worried.

Sara hadn't woken. All of the medical staff were very worried about Sara, even though they tried to hide it. Lis could tell that Serene was terrified and she had forced herself to be upbeat as the staff had prepared her for this odd bath simply to keep Serene from falling apart completely. Sara was Serene's daughter in every way that mattered. Lis had heard second hand what had happened when Serene had first found Sara, but she had no trouble believing that the other female Tenno would have reacted that way. Lis herself might have gone berserk if she had seen a Corpus crewman beating Sara. She hadn't been prepared to love Sara. Or Mishka. Or Serene. But she did.

She had to focus. She had to relax. This would not be a quick process, to change her skin back to what it had been before. The tower had changed her body on the genetic level to allow her to serve. She had thought her punishment eternal. She wondered how Luc was dealing with it, if he was also having the same second thoughts she was. She was guilty. She knew she was, and...

"Stop that." A sour voice had Lis jerking and she went totally still as she realized she wasn't in the pod anymore. She was kneeling in sieza on grass, under a single tree. Across from her another warframe knelt. But not just any warframe...

"Saryn?" Lis tried to keep her tone level as she stared at the golden holo that was all that remained of the First Saryn. Her distant ancestor and the one who had created the warframe design that Lis herself wore. "I..."

"It has been a long time, Lis." The other said sadly. "You have not come to see us in a long, long time."

"I wasn't worthy." Lis said softly. "First... Nicholas. I... I shouldn't have followed him. But I thought... I thought he knew what he was doing." She hung her head, aware of her skin now appearing the red that it had been in life. "I was trained to think for myself and I didn't." She said with a sigh. She shook her head. "And then... the tower." She chuckled ruefully. "I really thought the punishment was eternal."

"It could have been." Saryn said quietly. Lis went still and Saryn shook her head. "Luc is fighting it. Resisting it. He still believes he was doing the right thing. Obeying Nicholas."

"Oh no." Lis said softly. "He was always..." She trailed off as Saryn chuckled without mirth.

"Lis, he chose to follow Nicholas." Saryn was sad now. "You followed orders when they were given. He followed. Period. They corrupted him but he did as they wanted. Maybe he can be turned back. Eventually. But... That is not your concern." The First Saryn's voice hardened. "Who can you change, Lis?"

"Myself." Lis agreed quietly. "No one else. I... Message received, Saryn." She bowed her head a little to acknowledge the rebuke. "Sara told me to talk to the First. Do you know what happened?" She asked, changing the subject.

"We were not watching." Saryn sounded worried. "We have been busy trying to keep Nyx from going completely bananas. After hating that scum Rasputin for so long, no one blames her for wanting vengeance. But she is so fixated... We worry she will not be able to change now." The Saryn warframe actually shivered. "As bad as Nikis or Janet going nuts would have been... Nyx is almost scarier. She wouldn't destroy everything. She would just make us all wish we were dead and gone."

"Can I talk to her?" Lis asked, her mind moving at lightspeed. Saryn looked at her and Lis scowled. "I need a scan done on my mind. Serene and Eliza say I didn't hurt Sara, but I think I did."

"I will ask." Saryn said with a nod, then she vanished. A moment later a Nyx warframe appeared, standing where the Saryn had knelt, her toe tapping. No, the Nyx.

"Nyx." Lis said, bowing her head. "Can you help?"

"I am busy, Lis." Nyx said sharply. Lis recoiled and Nyx sighed. "Yes, yes I will help. I know I am... not rational about this." She knelt and held out her hands to Lis who took them.

"No one blames you." Lis said with a snarl. "No one at all. Do us all a favor and make it hurt."

"Oh I am." Nyx replied with an evil chuckle. Then she paused and recoiled.

"Nyx?" Lis asked, concerned.

"Oh my god." Nyx said, sounding stunned, hurt and scared. "Lis... It wasn't you."

"Well, thank goodness for that." Lis said, relaxing. But then she stiffened as Nyx did not. "Nyx?"

"It wasn't you." Nyx repeated. "It wasn't Sara. But..." She swallowed hard. "It felt familiar."

"Nyx?" Lis asked, fear rising.

"I... cannot say." Nyx said slowly. "We have interfered too much. The Balance must be maintained, Lis. You know this."

"I do." Lis said, bowing her head. "Nyx...?"

"Yes, Lis?" Nyx asked as she rose.

"Don't become what you fight, Nyx." Lis said as she rose and before Nyx could retreat, hugged the shade. She could feel tears threatening, but she held them back. "You are better than him. Far, far better." Nyx went still, but then slowly returned the embrace. This was a virtual world, the regular rules did not apply. "Please." Lis begged as she released Nyx and stepped back.

"I am no Oracle to know the future, Lis." Nyx said, her tone suspiciously husky. "But I will do my best." Lis bowed formally and Nyx returned it, one sister to another. Then the First Nyx vanished.

"Well..." Lis said slowly. "If I didn't do it and she didn't do it, then someone else did. But...why? She is just a kid." She mused as she knelt again. Then she was back in her body. The fluid was draining, She must have finished the treatment while her mind was elsewhere. She kept herself still while the fluid was pumped out and the lid over her was opened.

"Tenno Lis?" The voice of the head medic was cautious and Lis could understand.

"Chirurgeon." Lis kept herself still while white garbed forms reached in to undo various connections. "I am... whole. I think." She said with a sigh. "Did it work?" Instead of answering, one of the white garbed forms lifted her hand so she could see. Red skin shone on fingers where gold metal had been. Lis sighed. "I feel... ambivalent." She shook her head slowly. "No matter. I am needed. I serve."

"Take it easy for a bit." Chirurgeon said calmly as one of the nurses helped Lis sit up. "You will likely be a bit shaky."

"I will survive." Lis said with a nod. "Sara?" She asked.

"She has not woken." Chirurgeon bowed his head. "She may not. Her brain was starved of oxygen. Not for long." He hastened to say.

"But it can be difficult to judge the extent of such damage in humans until they wake. If they do." Lis said with a nod. Chirurgeon looked at her and she frowned. "I studied to be a medic. Once. Long ago."

"You saved her life." The healer replied with a smile that faded. "Now? We can only do what we can do."

"Chirurgeon..." Lis said softly. "Is Michelle available? I need to talk to her."

"She is waiting outside." The medic sighed as Lis sat up. "Would it be too much to get you a gown first?" He asked sourly as the other medics left the room.

"She needs to hear this now and so do you." Lis said with a scowl. Chirurgeon stared at her and then nodded. He hit a control and a door hissed open, two human shapes entering. One was Michelle, Princess of Orokin. She did not look at ease in her gown. The other was Michelle's guard, Petra. "Princess..." Lis said without preamble since Michelle put little stock in formality. "Sara was attacked."

"Not by you." Petra said firmly and Lis nodded. It wasn't a shock to anyone. Good.

"While I slept in the pod, I spoke to Nyx." Lis said with a gulp that the others shared. Nyx was... not entirely stable at the moment and no one blamed her in the slightest. It wasn't every day a Tenno got a chance to exact revenge on one who had hurt so many people so badly. "She said it wasn't me, but she either did not know who did it or could not say. Either way... the Balance must be maintained, so they will withdraw a bit. We will not be able to speak to them for a while."

"Probably for the best." Michelle said with a nod. "We have our own problems. Involving the First in some of the situations we have faced recently was needed, but... not always the best choice."

"Like using a particle beam to cut butter." Lis agreed. "It works, but oh the collateral damage." Everyone winced at that. "Sara is stable?" She asked Chirurgeon who nodded. "The feeling was familiar, a mental attack. But... not anyone I knew. She was snared by a mental attack. Thinking about it... it shifted to one directed specifically at her as I watched. I drove it away, and must have unconsciously moved to protect her from whoever was trying to kill her."

"Who would attack Sara?" Chirurgeon demanded. "Serene would eat them for breakfast!"

"And go away hungry." Petra actually shuddered, but then again... The former Banshee was not a foe to take lightly even now. "We will investigate." She promised.

"Princess... Guard Commander..." Lis said slowly, her eyes downcast. "It was a Tenno attack."

"What?" The exclamation came from three throats. Michelle recovered first.

"Explain." The Princess sad sternly. Space itself might have warped under her gaze. Lis met her eyes calmly.

"After Nicholas left... I was a renegade." Lis said softly. "Nicholas sent me out with orders to find potential recruits or resources we could use. I did find resources, but I never found any recruits for him." She did not react as Petra scoffed.

"How hard did you look?" The Mag Prime asked snidely. Michelle just shook her head and Petra nodded. "Never mind."

"Not very." Lis said sadly. "I was lost. But I would not take others down my road to damnation. He figured it out after a while, pulled me in to where he could keep a closer eye on me. Kept me occupied with missions and such." She bowed her head. "I should have seen his madness, but I was so busy keeping my head down."

"Survival is kind of important." Michelle said calmly. There was no censure in her voice. "But... what makes you think a Tenno attacked Sara?"

"On one of my missions, I was discovered by a Tenno. She wore a Nyx warframe." Lis said quietly. "I never learned her name, but she hunted me. I fled. She followed. She haunted my dreams and meditations for days until I evaded her. My nightmares were coils of gray mist that solidified into Karl screaming at me that I was a fool and a traitor." She bowed her head again. "I didn't realize it until I woke up just now, but it was the exact same kind of mental attack as I sensed in Sara. She has been having nightmares. I didn't think anything of it." She slumped, tears threatening. "I should have."

"Sara is changing." Chirurgeon reassured her. "She is having difficulty as her body changes. We have managed to slow the changes, but not stop them." He slumped a bit. "We cannot stop them."

"She is part human and part Tenno." Michelle agreed. "She is growing up into her body. It is..." She grimaced and Lis nodded.

"Difficult." The red skinned Tenno agreed. "In the first nightmare, there was blood." Lis said quietly. "But not from her mouth. From... further down." Michelle and Petra both stiffened but Chirurgeon just sighed. "She is menstruating, isn't she?"

"She wanted it kept quiet." The medic said quietly. "She and Serene both. She said and I quote 'I have caused enough trouble'. Serene was handling it. It has only been once, and they would have told you the next time."

"Well, I am glad it wasn't a hemorrhage like I feared." Lis said with a sigh of her own. "But Chirurgeon... she is only three!" Worry and fear warred for prominence in her tone as Michelle and Petra both remained silent.

"Physically, she is fourteen." The medic sounded upset, and who could blame him? "Those Corpus butchers made her body to grow and then wear out quickly. So they could harvest her brain no doubt. Make copies of her." He shook his head. "But yes, emotionally, spiritually? She is less than three. She is handling it very, very well."

"No argument." Lis said softly. "Can I stay with her?"

"I think she would like that." Chirurgeon said with a nod to Michelle who nodded back. "If she was attacked once though, she may be again. We must ward her." Petra nodded.

"I certainly hope they try." Lis said with a snarl. "I learned a bit about defending my mind after my own... incident. I am no Nyx, but I would love to hurt anyone who thinks to harm Sara. Mentally or otherwise."

"Try not to make a mess." Michelle said with a wince. Lis looked at her and Michelle grimaced. "Saryn warframes are not precision instruments, Lis." Michelle had worn one.

"I will not assume a warframe yet." Lis said with a shrug. "I need time to center myself. Time to come to grips with who and what I am. I feel... ambivalent still. Not worthy." Michelle cast a long look at her and Lis sighed. "Please?"

"We need every Tenno, Lis." Michelle said softly. She shook her head. "But..." She stepped close and laid a gentle hand on Lis' shoulder. "Take what time you need." She gave Lis' shoulder a squeeze and retreated. Petra stepped forward.

"The only one with doubts here is you, sister." Petra said, taking Lis' hands in her own. "But we will give you time."

"Thank you." Lis said as both Michelle and Petra turned and left the room. "Sara?" She asked Chirurgeon who sighed dramatically.

"Gown." The medic said with a mock snarl as he opened a drawer and tossed a package at her. "I do not want you scandalizing my staff, Tenno Lis."

"It's not like they haven't seen me in the buff, Chirurgeon." Lis said with a small smirk as she put the gown on. Then she paused. "But... Thanks." The medic paused his obviously humorous reply and looked at her. "I... don't think I deserve this, but I will not fail Sara."

"There are those here on Avalon who think you should have been executed." Chirurgeon said with a sigh. "I am not one of them. No one on my staff who has seen you with Sara or Mishka believes that. The ones who do, do not know you. Or the situation you were in. They only know the reports. Most of which were edited." Lis smiled a bit forlornly as she smoothed the gown. It did not cover her much.

"I understand." Lis nodded."And I will not-" whatever else she was going to say was cut off by a shriek from nearby. Lis paled and ran, Chirugeon at her heels. "Sara!" Sara was sitting up in her bed, her eyes wild as she stared around. She froze as Lis entered the room, Chirurgeon at the heels. "Sara?" Lis asked softly, worried. Sara's eyes went huge as she saw the female Tenno. "What is wrong?"

"Lis?" Sara asked, her voice tiny. "Is that you?"

"Yeah." Lis said with a shrug, relaxing a little. "I know I look different." She smiled. "I can stick some golden hoops on my head if you want." Sara stared at her and then the girl was laughing. But she was crying at the same time. Lis slid into a chair that was sitting by Sara's bed and held the girl tight as Sara cried. "Sara... oh Sara... Another nightmare?"

"These are not nightmares, Lis." Sara said as she cried into the Tenno's shoulder. "I... I saw Mom... She died... I..."

"Enough." Lis said sharply, her hand coming down to cup the back of Sara's skull. "Get out of her head!" She commanded. Sara jerked as something happened and Lis snarled. "When I find you, I will hurt you, whoever you are. Leave Sara alone!" She snapped and the presence, whatever it was, vanished.

"Lis?" Sara asked, dazed by all this. Chirurgeon scowled and moved to check the instrumentation nearby. "What? What is happening?"

"Someone attacked you, Sara." Lis said quietly. Sara jerked and Lis gave her a hug. "Someone trained as a Tenno. I will find them. And when I do?" She smiled nastily. "I am going to beat them to within an inch of their life and let them explain to Serene why."

"Why attack me?" Sara begged as Lis held her carefully. "I have been trying to be good."

"Sara, you have been good." Lis said, easing the terrified girl with soft caresses that works their magic quickly. Sara relaxed. "Someone else has been bad and I will find out who."

"I don't deserve you, Lis." Sara said, hugging the Tenno warrior tight.

"Deserve has nothing to do with it, Sara." Lis said gently as she soothed the girl's pain away. "Nothing at all. We protect those we love. Someone has hurt you."

"I think it is time I find and hurt them."