AN: Okay...sorry it took so long. Some stuff popped up. But it takes a while to write eight pages on a computer, if you don't know...that's really long! It takes a while.

I'll try and keep Alice as in character as I possibly can!

I own nothing but Mitch! Sorry for any mistakes! Review please, not that hard to do. Just click that tiny button at the bottom!

Alice and the others didn't show up the next day. I still felt bad about making Jasper almost loose control. The night after the party Mitch quietly helped me start my scrap book. We didn't mention what had happened. Once again it was plastic in water, we simply chose to mutely sew our lips together and play the silent game.

At lunch I looked over at their empty table. It was like it was owned, nobody touched it. I missed Alice, her smile, her laugh, her touch. I missed it.

Mitch hardly talked through the whole day. Only mumbling things to a person when they asked him something. I was becoming more worried, about everything.

"Mitch?" I questioned softly on our way home.

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay?"

"I hope so." He wasn't Alice, he could not see his future, all he'd ever had was hope. "It's still scary though. I have no idea what's happening to me." He mumbled, staring out the window.

"It's more scary when you act like this Mitch. It's not like you. And I'm not expecting you to not think about it and ignore, I'm not. It's just…at least talk about it with me. Or tell someone you feel strange and confused." I didn't know what I was saying. But I wanted him to tell me how he felt. I was his sister. I was supposed to be his confidant.

"Izzy…," He sighed. "I dunno." He mumbled. "It's not like you talk to me about everything."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I'm just confused and I don't really wanna talk about it now. I'm sorry." He mumbled and gave me an apologetic look before turning back to the window.

Alice was waiting for me, she smiled. Her golden eyes looked dull though. Like when we first met and she tried desperately to stay away. She did not have good news.

"Hey." I tried to ignore the nagging in the back of my mind.

Alice held out a hand. "Walk with me?" She sounded guilty. I turned back to see Mitch walk inside. I looked back to Alice and took her hand. She led me into the woods.

"Alice?" She let go of my hand and looked at me sadly.

"We need to leave Forks." She mumbled.

"Okay, why?"

"Carlisle is supposed to look ten years older, people are starting to take notice of that." She wouldn't look me in the eye.

"But that's not all is it?"

"There are a lot of other reasons."

"Look if this is about what happened at the party…I mean…nothing happened I just got a paper cut." I looked at the still present bandage on my finger.

"Izzy you could have been seriously hurt had Mitch and the others not been there." She finally met my eye.

"It was nothing."

"Compared to the alternative, yeah nothing did happen." She was annoyed, not with me I could tell. "Out of everything that could have happened…I saw nothing."

"You couldn't have possibly known something as small as a paper cut would happen Alice."

She looked away from me.

"Look I just…I have to think of something to tell Charlie, but…," There was something in the way her eyes darted to me then looked away and her now even more guilty disposition. I swallowed my nervousness. "Ali, when you say 'we'…,"

"I mean my family and I." She didn't seem to know what to do with herself. Her fingers clenched into fists over and over.

"Wait…Alice,…"

"You just,…you don't belong with me in my world."

"My place is with you."

"Maybe if I were human too."

This was not happening. "I'm going with you." I wish I felt as confident as I sounded.

"Izzy,"

"Don't call me that." I hissed. She looked surprised but recovered.

"Bella…you're staying here."

I took a step back. "No, you promised me. You can't just, you can't just leave. I'm going with you." I felt myself becoming more and more frustrated.

She shook her head. Still looking sad and guilty. "I don't want you to come."

I repeated to myself that this wasn't happening, but the fact that it was almost made me crumble like a well aged rock right there in front of her. "You don't want me."

"No."

This could not be the one who told me they loved me not even twelve hours ago. This couldn't be my Alice who had said she would look after my soul. It couldn't be.

"But if I could ask. Please at least be careful."

"Funny thing for you to say after you tell me you don't want me."

She looked hurt. She sighed and turned away from me. "You won't see me ever again after today. I can promise you that."

I stared after her. A few minutes afterwards I tried to follow, knowing she was long gone. Trying to walk through a dark forest in the dark? Not wise for a clumsy person.

Eventually I couldn't walk anymore, my face was covered in tears and my body with dirt. Everything spun and blended together. I finally crumbled like that well aged rock. I lay broken and crying. I wish Mitch was there. He always managed to pick me up when I had nothing else.

I was aware of someone carrying me, and that was it. I felt ill. I wanted my big brother. I was aware of voices. I wanted to cry more. I wanted my big brother. I wanted, I wanted, I wanted,…I wanted Alice. No, I wanted my brother to tell me it would all be okay.

I woke with a start. "La-la?" I looked around. My big brother. He sat and stared, worried eyes. Everything repeated in my mind and I flung myself at him. My arms around his neck I hugged him as tight as I could. "Mitch."

"You're fine. Everything's gunna be fine." The words I so desperately wanted to hear. I silently prayed they rang true. "I heard about the Cullen's." He mumbled. I crumbled all over again. "I'm so sorry Izzy."

I shook my head. "No. No more Izzy." I sat back and swiped the tears from my eyes. "Just La-la please." I smiled pathetically. I hated the name Izzy now. Because the one who used to call me with said name with so much affection had broken my heart into a million and ten bits, and I didn't think it could be fixed.

Mitch nodded and quietly hung my dream catcher for me, as if knowing I may need it.

"Who found me? In the woods." I didn't want to talk, but it was supposedly healthy and made a person suffering from depression feel better.

"I did. You didn't come back so I got worried and went out. I kind of panicked when you didn't answer me. Luckily you leave a huge line of destruction when you go somewhere in the woods." He chuckled.

I felt myself blush, despite my numbness. He could always make me feel better, even if only a little. I didn't know he was telling me a lie.

The months passed. I couldn't tell what day was what, they had all melded together and Sunday could have been the Friday of next week and I wouldn't have realized.

I spent three months in my room. Mitch bringing me my homework and turning it in to my classes for me. He brought me small snacks when I refused to eat large meals. I was weak. I was getting more tired and loosing weight and strength. Mitch was so worried he could barely focus on what he needed to do for himself.

In the fourth month he finally forced me out and back to school. He sat with me at the Cullen's empty table and switched some of his classes around. He was almost my 24/7 supervisor.

I sent texts and emails to Edward and Jasper. Neither responded. Alice had made sure to cut me off from all ties to them. I didn't know if I hated her or if I was simply disappointed. I was a total mess in almost every sense of the word.

Every night I repeated the same dream over and over. I guess it's a nightmare. She told me she didn't want me, she didn't love me…, and she left me to suffer on my own. Mitch began sleeping on the floor in my room to shake me awake when I began screaming.

I was suffering, and part of me was glad. A small tiny part settled deep inside. Telling me that the pain was proof that she had been there. That they all had been. And that I'd been told I was loved and that I'd done sweet things in my memories with the small pixie and that we'd been happy, maybe. It told me all these things and I believed it.

But then there was that tiny nag. That small negative part that was right too, the part that I also listened to but tried not to. The part that gave me questions that I possibly had all the answers to. Why did she leave if she loved me? Why did she tell me so many sweet thing just to leave? Why didn't she take me with her? And every single question had the same two answers: I wasn't loved and I wasn't wanted.

"Okay…dad and I have both honestly had it La-la." Mitch spoke to me after we arrived back from school. I stared at him as I closed the door.

"What?"

"Dad says you're going to live with mom in Jacksonville." He looked at me sternly as he leaned against the side of the truck.

I shook my head. "I'm not leaving Forks."

"La-la…she's not coming back."

I sighed. "I know."

"Dad and I are really scared about what's happening to you. And I haven't had a decent nights sleep in months. And dad can't focus on his work and I can't focus on mine and you're getting weaker almost every day."

Why did I always do this? I always ruined somebody's life.

I nodded. "I'm a gunna go shopping with Jessica tomorrow." I lied. Hoping he would buy it. He didn't seem to.

"No you're not. You're lying. You hate shopping La-la. Don't try to pull that stuff with me."

"No, I am. Really."

He looked skeptical but shrugged. "Whatever. So long as you get out of the house for something besides school." He walked off into the house.

The call to Jessica was awkward. She was not my favorite nor my real friend.

All Jessica did was complain. That was her life goal, complain about everything to get attention and look pretty. She was the obvious stereo-typical blonde. Then she began to make quips at me and I glared at her, she never even looked in my direction to know.

We passed an alley. I looked around saw a group of guys and bikes that looked familiar. Possibly the ones from the night Alice had saved my ass. I looked around and jumped when I saw a ghostly image of Alice.

'Don't stop walking. Go home'

I was confused, but then I felt angry. Jessica walked in front of me, looking at me oddly. Alice's ghostly image vanished. I calmed slightly.

"Dude,…come on." Jessica seemed freaked. I scoffed and looked down at the guys with bikes.

"I think I know them."

"…Well they seem great. Can we go?"

"Just a minute…" I turned and walked down the alley. A tight grip fastened around my wrist and tugged me back. I turned. Mitch glared down at me.

"Let's go." He growled and tugged me back up to the main street.

"But I want one of those bikes."

"Fine I'll buy one for you later." Mitch tugged me along. "Sorry Jessica. See ya around."

"Yeah no problem. See ya." She pocketed her hands and walked off.

"Wha-"

"She texted me, said you were acting funny so I came out here and waited for you so I could take you home." He explained as he dragged me to the truck and waited for me to climb in. He followed and started the truck, diving slow.

"What the hell is the matter with you Bella. You could have gotten hurt by those guys." He glared.

"I dunno…" I wanted to hurt Alice. Make her feel as bad as I did.

"You want one of those bikes I'll get one for you. Do not go running off to some strange loser on your own." He was the older brother of a strange teen and very protective.

"Okay." I mumbled, feeling like a scolded five year old who'd been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

That night I couldn't sleep. I was glad it was Friday. Mitch slept on the floor quietly. I silently realized that Alice had been a violent delight.

And at our most excellent moment, that violent delight in it's triumph…died.

Alice was my violent delight and we'd had a violent end. And our triumph and excellence died as she left.

She'd left me to freeze on my own in a barren frosted wasteland after promises of love and affection.

"…Fuck you." I mumbled, like poison on a sharp tongue.

I turned onto my side and for the first time in moths I don't scream, simply shift. It was almost peaceful.

Mitch did get me a bike. Two. But the busted ones were cheaper so that's what he got. He told me to take it to Jacob because he had more free time.

I sent more emails and texts to Edward and Jasper. Telling them I'd seen Alice. I knew I sounded crazy but I had to tell someone. And even though I felt a nasty feeling rise in my throat as I thought of how much Alice had hurt me,…it was still nice to see her face. To not forget.

And if danger was what it took to keep that face in mind, the one I hated but loved…then that's what I'd find. But still, I wasn't sure if I hated her…or was still simply disappointed.

I pulled into the dirt driveway of Jacob Black's home and hopped out. I spotted him and he grinned, jogging to me and hugging me tight. I missed Jake.

"Where the hell have you been? Hey, where's Mr. Fearless?" He smiled and looked around for Mitch.

"He's busy. But I'll bring him around." I pointed over my shoulder to the covered truck bed. "I brought you something."

He looked excited.

I opened the bed and pulled the cover off. He smirked. "Wow. Scrap metal. You really shouldn't have Bells."

"Well, I figured it'd be a fun thing to spend time on. And they're probably more to fix than Mitch bought them for." I stumbled over my words. "But then I figured if I have a mechanic friend to help me out…"

"Ohh." He nodded, getting it. "Mechanic type friend. If I'm not mistaken you've got a mechanic and sport type brother."

"He's busy. Plus I wanted to visit."

"Since when are you into motorcycles?" He pointed.

"Since now."

"Nice." He seemed doubtful. I wanted to do this. I wanted these bikes fixed up and I wanted to ride and a little tiny part of me wanted to crash.

There was a small silence as he looked thoughtfully at the bikes.

"Look I get it if you think this is dumb and dangerous, but…I mean it'd be fun." I tried lamely. He still looked thought as he nodded slowly.

"It is dumb and dangerous." He smiled. "When do we get started?" He laughed at my surprised expression. I recovered and looked at the bikes.

"Uh, right now if that's okay."

"That's great." He walked by me and removed the cover completely. He was getting ready to pull the bikes off the truck.

"Oh they're really heavy so…," He lifted them with ease. "Be careful." I finished quietly. Jacob was becoming amazing. Like Mitch. "Okay, you're buff. How did that happen? You're like sixteen."

He shrugged with a smirk. "Age ain't nuthin but a number, like they say. What are you now forty?"

My age was becoming more sensitive. "Feels like it sometimes." I feel like I've lived several decades now and again. Like since Alice left, it feels like its been ten years.

I sat back and watched as he began to check out the bike. A new song playing quietly on the radio. "Hey I was thinking if we do this everyday, and I hope we do, we have to do some homework sometime. I don't wanna have to repeat like Mitch."

Jacob snickered. "I don't think your brother has to worry about school."

"What's that mean?" I asked curiously as I crossed my legs.

"Dunno, just seems like everything will fall into place for that guy." He shrugged. Oddly enough he was right. Mitch was the kind of guy that seemed to just move along and everything just came to him. Why didn't I notice?

"Hey, Jake? You in here?"

I looked up at the door.

"It's okay, it's just some friends." Jake smiled and stood. Two skinny looking boys walked in. "This is Bella. Bella this is Quil and Embry." He pointed to who was who in turn. I nodded and mumbled a hello. They seemed nice.

"So you're really fixing up these bikes." Quil looked at me.

"Oh yeah, taught him everything he knows." I smile, feeling a little better. Real people with real conversation. I liked it.

"Is the rumor about you being his girlfriend true too?" Quil snickered and Jacob glared, I know he was glare because who wouldn't.

I smiled wider. "We're just friends." I clarified, looking up at Jake.

"Oh-ho, burn!" Embry and Quil laughed.

"Actually I said she's a girl and a friend." Jacob defended.

"Embry, do you remember him making that distinction?" Quil teased. Embry shook his head, smirking. "Nope." I laughed quietly with them.

"So you guys have girlfriends, that's awesome." I smirked.

"Yeah right. Quil is actually taking his cousin to prom." Jacob shot back. Oh how sweet revenge must be, of the teasing kind of course.

Embry laughed, now Quil was glaring. "Yeah, it's still alright."

Jacob continued to laugh.

"You want funny Black, I'll give you funny." Quil tugged Jacob away and pulled him into a headlock. I stood, grinning. Embry joined me.

I was actually almost happy. For the first time in months I was laughing and joking around. If one has never done so for a while…take my word that it feels amazing once you do.

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