I should have seen you coming, I should have been prepared
After all, getting half of what you wish for isn't so rare
But still I wasn't ready, you took me by surprise
You brought a light to my dark like a word from the wise
We fell in love in the summer, when the skies were clear
But I'm still wearing my coat from winter last year
I need to set my house in order, confess and cover my sins
I need to make a home for you before inviting you in
Weather wears the mountains right down into the sea
So I will stand in the rain until I am clean
Rivers carve the country, a landscape shaped by a stream
So I will swim in the river as long as you need
-The Fastest Way Back Home, Frank Turner
Beth's eyes fluttered as she slowly woke and regained consciousness. The morning light slipped in through the windows that looked out onto the porch and parade grounds. Beth was frequently an early riser, but Carol was always up earlier than she was out of habit, and out of necessity. She had also admitted to Beth on the first night they shared the room that she didn't sleep very well, but that she was quiet, and wouldn't wake Beth if she could help it.
Beth had said that Carol's sleeping patterns wouldn't be a problem as long as she were comfortable. Beth had shared her room with Aunt Patricia after Uncle Otis died, and the grieving older woman kept her awake most nights with her sobs. Beth had a big heart, and she didn't mind, but she couldn't care for Judith with the amount of sleep she had when her aunt shared her room.
So far, Carol and Beth's living situation had worked out. Carol was out the door long before Beth was awake, and Beth was asleep long before Carol returned to the room. Carol made sure to bring firewood for the wood stove, and Beth made sure the fire was stoked. Beth kept the room clean, and Carol helped to make it pretty by bringing back little trinkets she found. Their room was the nicest, and it had a couple little chairs in a sitting area near the stove, and a table in between them. Maggie would sometimes come over during the day, and sit with Beth while she cared for Judith or mended someone's clothes.
Beth could hear Carol moving around in the bedroom. A new log was added to the fire, and Beth could already feel the warmth spreading around the room. She reached her arms over her head, stretched, and slowly opened her eyes to find Carol sitting on the edge of her bed, her knife clenched in her fist.
Beth gasped and sat up quickly, watching Carol as she stared intently at her blade. The older woman rotated her fist, and watched the blade as it twisted into imaginary flesh.
"Carol?" Beth asked, her voice a quiet gasp.
Carol looked up at the young woman with a confused look on her face. She then looked back down at her knife and at how hard she was clenching it. "Oh. Sorry to frighten you. The handle broke yesterday, and I'm trying to repair it until I can get another knife. I was putting tape around it, and hoping that it would hold if we ran into some walkers on the way to get a new one. It doesn't fit in my hand quite as well as it did before."
"When are you making a run?" Beth asked, as she stepped out of bed, and slipped her feet into her shoes. She shivered, and drew her coat around herself.
"Later this morning. Tyreese, Michonne, Abraham, and I are going back out to see if we can find more food, and bring back anything else people need."
"You can borrow my knife." Beth said, going to her shelf and digging through her bag. "I'm not going to need it today."
"You sure?" Carol asked, standing up to stand behind Beth.
"Pretty sure. It's not like I go outside the fort, really." Beth said with a frustrated sigh. She clasped the handle, pulled it out of her bag, and flipped it, giving the hilt to Carol. It wasn't like she didn't want to go outside the fort, but she never had the opportunity, or the supervision Maggie and Rick required her to have when she wanted to go outside for a walk.
Carol looked at it for a minute, and smiled as she let out a little huff of a laugh. "This Daryl's?"
Beth blushed and looked away, "Well, it might have been. I took it from him after the prison, and I never gave it back. He's got a new one, and basically told me I could keep it. I want it back."
Carol chuckled and nodded, slipping the knife into her sheath. "I promise you'll get it back."
Beth nodded and went to look out the window to see what the weather looked like today. It seemed colder. She could see a few people walking to the fire pit to start making breakfast for the masses. They were in winter coats brought back for them by some of the scouts. She could see Tara and Sasha with thick socks on under their boots and scarves wrapped around their necks. Eugene was up this morning as well, and he found a winter cap to throw on over his head. Daryl carried in a few squirrels and a bird from the woods just outside the fort. Beth's ears turned pink, but she also became nervous because of the way their interaction ended last night. She wasn't sure if Daryl was mad at her for not telling Rick the truth, or if he was even ready to talk to the man he considered a brother about where they were, and where they might go as a couple in the future.
"I'm going to ask you a question, but you don't have to answer if you don't want to." Carol said, not looking at Beth. She pulled her socks on, and stuck her feet into her boots. "What's going on with you and Daryl?"
Beth turned away from the window, shocked that Carol was asking her this question. First, she didn't know how to answer the question, and second, she was concerned that Carol would be angry because she knew that Carol had something with Daryl previously, or so she thought. She'd never really asked Daryl about it, but everyone whispered about how close they were at the prison, and Beth had been able to see it with her own eyes as well.
"I, uh, don't know what you're talking about." Beth said, looking away from Carol.
Carol walked up to Beth and put her hand on her chin. "I told you that you didn't have to answer, but don't lie to me." She made Beth look her in the eyes, "I'm not going to ask you again, but it would be best for you to remember to not lie to me when I ask you things in the future."
Beth's eyes went wide; was Carol threatening her? The older woman opened the door and walked out, letting the cool air from outside into the warm room. Beth watched her walk towards the breakfast crew and help them begin setting up for breakfast.
After breakfast, Rick was relaxing with Carl and Judith in the living area, and Beth sat near them and having a discussion with Maggie, Glenn, and Daniel about religion. Glenn had been raised Christian with his family. They went to a Korean-Christian Church in Michigan when he was a child, but when he moved to Atlanta he stopped attending church altogether.
Daniel asked the family about beginning Church services every Sunday for the believers in the group. Beth knew that Rick and Carl had been Churchgoers, as had Michonne, Carol, Sasha, and Tyreese. Daryl would sit on the perch sometimes while her daddy read from the Bible, but she had no idea if he had believed in God or not. He had always let them perform the services they wanted to participate in, and he had frequently watched, but didn't mind taking guard duty from someone if they would rather attend services.
Beth enjoyed having Daniel with them, and she knew Maggie did too. Together they prayed with Daniel for the safety of the group, and the health of their family. They read passages from the Bible that gave them hope that God was still there for them, and that this disease was not a punishment of their sins. Together, they came to terms with the deaths they had suffered as a family, and they began to heal the scars of seeing their father murdered before their eyes.
The Greene sisters needed someone like Daniel to help them heal, and Beth began to feel like there was hope again. She startled less when someone grabbed her by the arm, and she didn't carry the same weight as when they reached the fort. He told her that God would forgive her for killing the man who attacked Carl, because she had killed in self-defense.
The conversations eased her guilt, and she began to have a friendly relationship with Daniel. He was older than she was; perhaps in his mid-thirties. The Pastor had told her some of the things about his life before, like the fact that he had a wife and a child that had been lost at the beginning, and he had questioned why God was punishing him. She appreciated his candor, and his willingness to share that information with her. It made her feel like he was someone she could trust, and it made her feel better about her own questions of doubt.
They had finished the discussion about church services, and were idly chatting about other things in their lives; the alligator they had seen near the coast, who sunned itself when the weather was nice, exotic pets they wouldn't mind having and domesticating someday, the future.
They were in the middle of a humorous conversation when Beth felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around with a smile to find Daryl clutching his crossbow in front of his chest. He shuffled from foot to foot, and looked at her through his bangs. Beth thought he looked nervous as he spoke with her.
"I'm goin' out. Since you don't have Lil' Asskicker, you wanna come?"
Beth grinned and nodded. "Yeah. Let me grab my winter boots and I'll meet you at the drawbridge."
She ran to the room she shared with Carol and grabbed her boots. When she reached for her knife, she remembered that she had lent it to Carol for the day, and didn't have it. Carol had left hers on the table, and she imagined that the other woman wouldn't mind her using it for the day, especially since she had hers and had threatened Beth that morning. Beth was still confused about Carol's attitude, and she wasn't sure who she should talk to about it, or if she should even mention it. She imagined speaking to Carol would be the best course of action, but at that moment, Carol intimidated the young woman.
She stuck the broken blade into her pocket and ran out the door, eager for a walk with Daryl. They would finally get to spend some time together without peering eyes from everyone else.
They walked to the white bridge that led onto the island. The road from the fort to the bridge was no more than half a mile long, but this area of the island felt isolated from the fort. They cut across into a patch of trees that Daryl hadn't been to in a few days and began to walk quietly in search of dinner.
"Here, you wanna give it a shot?" Daryl asked, holding his bow out for Beth to take. She smiled and took the bow from him, much like she had the first time, and began tracking like he had shown her months ago. They had a few lessons several months ago before Beth was hurt, but they hadn't had the opportunity for Beth to practice again in some time. She slowly began to walk forward, observing the leaves, frost, and mud for signs of tracks. Beth noticed a few scrapes in the ground here in there, but she wasn't sure what had made them. People had talked about an alligator that lived on the island, and she wondered if it were the tail that had made that zig-zag pattern, and if the thick dragged line down the center of the tracks was its belly.
"I was kinda pissed at Rick last night." Beth said softly as she crept forward; she kept her voice low to avoid startling any animals that might have been in their general area.
"Yeah?" Daryl asked with a chuckle. "Me too. Someone's always interruptin' us."
Beth giggled and nodded, "Yeah. Michonne, Rick, Carol, Hector, Carl… Any chance we get a minute alone, we can be pretty certain we won't get to do more 'en say hi."
Daryl smiled and pulled Beth back by wrapping his fingers in her belt loop. He lifted the crossbow out of her hands and rested it upright at the base of a thick palm tree. Beth turned around and looked at him with a curious expression on her face, and Daryl gave her a smirk and said, "Hi."
Beth broke into a grin and turned a bright pink, "Hi," she whispered and wrapped her arms around him as she pulled him into a hug. Her arms went around his chest and she leaned her head onto his shoulder. She closed her eyes and breathed him in as his hands caressed the back of her arm, and her upper back. It was a position they had shared several times. The first time was back at the prison after Zach had died and Daryl had given her a comforting hug. Now, she took the hug as a connection to the man to whom she was closest.
"I gotta say that I didn't pull you out here to say hi." Daryl said. Beth could hear his voice rumbling in his chest, and she delighted at the feel of it as she pressed her cheek to his shoulder. She reluctantly pulled away and adjusted her coat as she looked up into his eyes. She was sad that he wasn't interested in physical comfort, but she knew that he was a serious man, and that he was serious about hunting.
"I know. We're out here to hunt." She frowned slightly; her lips turned to a pout. Daryl caught her chin as she turned to pick up the crossbow, and she looked up into his eyes.
"Not really what I meant." His blue eyes were squinted in the sunlight, but she could still read the meaning behind them. He wasn't out here only to hunt. He didn't bring her out here to bring back dinner. He brought her out here so he could spend some time with her on his own, without the chance of anyone interrupting them any time soon. They wouldn't be interrupted until they were ready to be interrupted out here. A bubble of hope spread within Beth's chest, and she could feel the fluttering of wings as she thought of their relationship. She took in a deep, shuddering breath as his eyes drifted down toward her mouth. She licked her lips, and watched as he mirrored her movements.
His pale pink lips shimmered with saliva, and the whiskers on his chin were longer than before. She wondered how the bristles would feel against her cheeks now. His short stubble had felt delightfully rough, but now the facial hair seemed softer and wispier, and she imagined that the hair would tickle as they embraced.
"Oh." Beth said with a smile. "Woods are kinda becoming our spot, huh?" Her voice sounded deeper to her own ears, husky and full of desire.
Daryl looked at her with a smirk and he nodded his head. "Mmm."
She looked up at him, and took the whole man in. Her attraction to Daryl was not only his physical appearance; yes, he had incredibly attractive arms, and what she had seen of his chest had been nice as well, but his whole demeanor around her was what drew her to him.
Daryl didn't treat her like she was fragile; he treated her like she was capable of anything she planned to do. He saw her as more than the sweet caregiver to the infants and invalids; he saw her wild, stubborn side, and he let her lead where she wanted to go. He was kind to her. He thought of her, and brought her trinkets when he was out on runs. Two weeks ago, she had found a small necklace on her pillowcase, and she knew who had brought it for her by the way he smiled when she came to dinner and it glinted in the candlelight. Most importantly, he was honest with her, and he didn't avoid telling her things because she was too young to know them; he didn't treat her like one of the kids, like some of the others. He told her his thoughts, and when he was feeling comfortable, he told her his feelings.
Beth was the most beautiful woman Daryl had ever met, and some days, he couldn't believe she'd be interested in a guy like him. Her heart was what called to him. While she could be hot-headed, and stubborn one minute, she was constantly aware of his emotional state. She could tell when he needed someone close, and when he needed space. She would give him what he needed, and often times, she encouraged others to do the same. She wasn't afraid of his temper, and he knew that he needed someone on his side who wouldn't flinch away from him when he shouted. She and Rick were the only people who could handle his self-imploding tendencies.
"So, you just gonna stand there lookin' at me, or are you gonna kiss me?" Beth smirked. "Or, do I gotta kiss you?"
"Shut up, Greene." Daryl said with a chuckle, as he leaned in to kiss her. Beth brought her arms up from around his waist to his shoulders, and moved in closer to him. His big hands rested on her hips, and he pulled her closer to him. He had to bend his head to reach her mouth, and she had to stand on her toes, but they managed to fit together comfortably.
Daryl's lips were soft against hers; pliant and willing to be guided in the direction she wanted to take the kiss. He didn't want to move too fast, but he also didn't want to remain stagnant. He began kissing Beth with simple light pressure on her bottom lip, and she softly pressed her lips to his upper lip. They pressed slow, soft kisses on each other's mouths for a moment before Beth moved and captured Daryl's bottom lip with her own. She increased the pressure, softly squeezing his lip with hers, and eventually, she began to lick his bottom lip, begging him to let her in.
Daryl opened his mouth, and met Beth's tongue on his bottom lip. Her mouth parted as well, and their tongues lapped gently against each other. His beard scratched more than she imagined it would, but it wasn't uncomfortable. The way his mouth moved over hers made her feel the scratchiness over her lips, cheeks, and chin. She wondered how it would feel over other areas of her body; areas that began to tingle with a desire to be touched.
The older man increased pressure, and pulled Beth in closer. His arms tightened around her thin frame, and pulled her closer to him. Beth's thigh slipped between Daryl's legs, and she could feel his hardness through his jeans. It wasn't the first erection Beth had ever felt, but it was the first time she had felt him respond to her this way. Her heartbeat raced, and she pulled back slightly. Daryl leaned forward to follow her. Their teeth clashed together, and both Daryl and Beth pulled back in a hiss.
"Sorry," He mumbled, and moved to return to Beth's lips.
She leaned back and looked up at Daryl, halting him before he could reach her mouth. She was nervous, and felt a little frightened by his attraction. She had dated Jimmy and Zach, but she hadn't even gone further than kissing with either of them. She knew that she wouldn't be stopping there with Daryl. She knew that he would wait for her until she was ready, but she was still nervous about having sex with the older man. He would be more experienced, and might think it stupid that she hadn't had sex with anyone even though she was over eighteen and had two boyfriends during the end of the world.
"This is a little uncomfortable," she said, coming up with an excuse to stop before they got too heated. "You have to lean over too much, and my calves are burning from standing on my toes. Let's hunt up dinner, and head back. Maybe we could have a look at the visitor's center. Maybe we could be alone there." She needed time to get used to the feel of him, and the idea that they could be in a serious relationship. She needed time to relax and to feel comfortable exposing her most intimate parts to him. She also didn't want her first time to be in the woods somewhere. Maybe she was building sex up a little bit, but she wanted it to be special with him.
Daryl was admittedly a little disappointed in himself. He felt like the whole situation could have been better planned, and if he hadn't made the juvenile mistake of mashing his teeth against hers, she wouldn't want to stop. He hadn't had much luck in relationships throughout his life. He had been focused on survival from a young age, and after his father's friend had assaulted him, he had felt like an abnormal freak and hadn't wanted to be as close to anyone as he would need to be to have a relationship with them. Women would approach him in bars, and leave him their phone numbers, but he had thrown them away without even looking at the napkins they were written on. His brother bought him a prostitute for his thirtieth birthday, thinking that getting over the sex hang-up would help him, and then he could fuck as many women as he wanted.
The problem was, Daryl hadn't wanted to be intimate with anyone until he and Beth had spent time together. He had tried with the prostitute, just so his brother wouldn't berate him and call him a faggot or something, and he had sex with her, but it hadn't been good. He hadn't enjoyed it. With Beth, he enjoyed every moment they had together. He enjoyed holding her hand, and kissing her, and he had been surprised when he felt himself responding to the kiss. He had tried to not let his unfamiliarity with women show, but he knew that sooner or later Beth would find out. He didn't want her to judge him based upon his inexperience.
"Yeah, alright. You track, an' I'll shoot. Next time, we'll git some target practice in for you." Daryl said, picking up his crossbow. He pointed to the tracks they had found on the ground earlier, and indicated that she should follow them.
Beth nodded and placed a kiss on his cheek. "That sounds good. Now, let's hurry up and get dinner so we can get back to try to find a quiet place on our own."
Daryl smirked and tried to ignore his blush, "Well, git on with it, then."
Out of appreciation for all of the wonderful comments, favorites, follows, and messages from you, my readers, I have decided to update this story earlier than I had planned. I'm so grateful for all of the love you are sharing in your reviews, and I am so touched and flattered by each kind word.
I'm sorry I haven't responded yet, (I've been working on the the next three chapters pretty diligently), but please know that each review, follow, and favorite really means the world to me. And, each review makes me feel guilty that I haven't posted the next chapter yet, so it's a good motivation to get me to write more ;).
I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please feel free to let me know what you think!
LHB