Chapter Two: What Once Was

We cannot simply see horrible things and wish for them to be better.

Wishing will change nothing. The course of your future will still be held on to the decision you made to let a certain person or event effect you while you just stood by and wished it hadn't.

A girl stares at herself in a pond and paints her face for the noble war. She wears her white mask of hatred and her lips are so red it's a shame she didn't paint them with her own blood. Instead, it is the blood of hundreds of others that have dug themselves deep into her soul and taken root. The branches of fallen soldiers pour from the roots of her hair and set flames to the world before her.

There are silver tears falling from the sockets where her eyes should be. There is a pounding in her chest that cannot be silenced until the last breath leaves her lips, which will take far longer than any normal lifespan.

The world has awoken and the war has begun.

She takes her final bow before the mask is removed and the plot begins to spin.

She was five years old when she first met the man who would inevitably ruin her life.

They had both been admitted to the academy earlier than most based on pure talent. Itachi Uchiha was a prodigy born and raised, while Shin Natasu was a prodigy made from dirt and rags; a foster child to a single civilian whose main income was working part time at a sushi shack down the road from their apartment. The young red haired girl had joined the ninja academy because she would be fully working by the age of 12, making more money than average and repaying her mother for taking her in at such a critical time in her life.

Both of their goals were protection.

For Itachi, it was the village.

For Shin, it was her mother.

Those goals alone should have been enough to unite them as a strong duo force, but sadly the two were more alike than just their abilities. They both lived in isolation due to their status. While Itachi was congratulated for his strength, Shin was exiled - a girl who no moral structure could not be a safe weapon.

They had bumped into each other the day of their orientation. She had been walking home with her head down, the glossy red hair that matted her head hanging in front of her face as if she had already been defeated. She had been up all night dealing with her mother's coughing fits, trying to coax her to sleep before she had to return to work. This left the five year old with two hours of sleep and a full day ahead of her.

She was thinking about dinner when she crashed into the boy's chest and fell to the ground. Normally the young girl would let the incident go, always making it a point to avoid any sort of conflict. Things didn't get to her easily – she had far much more to worry about, but for some reason that day had her on edge and she couldn't help but snap her head up at the boy in front of her with glaring eyes.

However, that is all she did.

Itachi looked down at the girl in front of him, his face blank. She had messy red hair that had been cut so messily that it stuck out all over her head like a porcupine. Her eyes were dark as night, with a light blue tint to them that reflected his own. She was pale and skinny and wore a simple black outfit with no proper design to it whatsoever.

"Excuse me," he said, reaching out his hand as to help her up. It seemed odd to him that she had not said anything, and still continued to say nothing even when her cold hands grabbed his and he lifted her up. "I apologize."

The girl only nodded before walking passed him.

Dear diary,

Today I met a boy and I was really nervous. He made me mad because he knocked me down and I got dirt all over my clothes, so now I'm going to be made fun of at the academy because I'm dirty. Kaa can't afford the water bill so I can't wash them, and even if I could they would only get stolen when I hang them outside to dry. I was so angry even though I know it's not his fault because I wasn't looking where I was going I'm still going to blame him because he's perfect. We're both the youngest in our class which means we have the same potential but I already know everyone else treats him better than me. We're the same but different and I don't know how that can be.

Anyway, Kaa is sleeping right now which is good because she didn't sleep much last night, even though she still slept more than I did. I wish I could fix her but I don't know what's wrong with her and she won't tell me. I think it's the lack of food. She left leftover sushi on the counter today but I don't want to eat it because then she won't have any food in the morning.

I'm going to try to sleep but I doubt it will happen. I really wish I had a pet to keep me company.

Dear Diary,

It's been two years since I've entered the academy and today is the day I graduate. They told me 12 was the youngest I could be before I officially earned my title as a shinobi, but today is actually my birthday and I am only 7. The only other people in the entire village to do this well were Kakashi Hatake and Itachi Uchiha. Kakashi is older than me so he's well off already but Itachi is graduating with me tomorrow. People are starting to see me just like they see him, just not as perfect. Wish me luck with telling Kaa! She's either going to be very happy or very upset, I'm not sure.

Dear Diary,

Kaa still isn't talking to me.

I don't know what I did wrong.

Diary,

We took Kaa to the hospital today - we as in me and Itachi. I went to bring flowers to Kaa at the sushi shack to apologize for whatever I did wrong and when I got there she wasn't breathing. Her boss was trying to help her but he didn't know anything about it. Itachi saw me and carried her to the hospital while I carried her things. I'm still here, in the waiting room. Itsachi went home an hour ago because had to watch his brother while his dad was at a meeting. It's funny how odd that word sounds to me - Dad. Ever since I left the academy I forgot people were dad's, since I didn't have to see anyone else with theirs.

I wanted to be mad at him but it's not his fault. Nothing I ever get mad at him for is his fault and that only makes me mad at myself.

"I heard you got assigned to a team today, Shin-chan. Congratulations."

Shin Natasu looked up from the book in her lap and gave a small smile. She still had yet to say more than a few words to the boy in passing since their encounter five years ago, but it did not discourage him from trying. Shin was the closest thing to a friend the young boy had, and he would not give that up simply because she did not like to speak very often.

"Arigatou."

Her voice was barely audible - she was too soft spoken for such rough features. Her messy hair had grown passed her shoulders, but still stook out in spikes due to her previous sheared haircut. Her clothes had become a bit nicer over the years, donning tight black pants and a matching top. Her shinobi headband was tied tightly on her upper arm above a series of bandages that wrapped down to her elbow.

"When do you meet them?"

The girl shrugged. Itachi sighed.

"Oh well, I'll see you later."

She smiled at him, her gaze never faltering as the young man turned and began walking towards his home

.Dear Diary,

Today I turned 11 and it was the best birthday I've ever had.

Kaa made dinner for me and it was delicious. We sat around hte living and talked and she didn't even cough once. Itachi came over and actually stayed for more than a few minutes. It's so hard being around him because I want so much to be him, and I can't explain that to him because he'll think I'm being selfish. I already know I am, but... I don't know how to explain it even to you, diary. But I think me and him are becoming friends and I kind of like it.

I've never had a friend before.

Itachi and I went to the cherry blossom festival today. This is the first day we actually spent the day together. He's leaving for a mission tomorrow morning and won't be back until a month from now. It's strange because I'm going to miss him, even though we only spend a few minutes together a day. I don't have another mission until next week, and until then it's just going to be me and Kaa.

I wont a stuffed animal at the festival and ate a lot of food. Itachi walked me home afterwards and has probably already made it to his house. He's become a chuunin, which is a great thing and I shouldn't be jealous but I am. I know that I'll pass the exams next year, it just feels weird how he's already ahead of me.

Kaa is in the hospital.

I'm so scared.

The doctors said that Kaa can come home tomorrow.

I hope Itachi understands why I cannot be at the gate when he comes home.

Diary,

Itachi came over and made dinner for Kaa while I was preparing for tomorrow's mission. I wish there was something I could do for him to show my appreciation, but I can't. He'll never truly understand how much that meant to me.

I don't want to leave now that he's home. The world is so lonely.

It was at this passage that the man had to close the old book and place it back on the shelf. After the funeral had passed, the young criminal detached from his partner and made his way to the poorer side of Kohana.

The apartment complexes seemed to be almost completely cleared out, minus one or two rooms that were occupied in each building. The same, rusty smell lingered in the air and the stray cats still roamed about the dumpsters that littered the back alleyway. Itachi resisted a sigh, only staring at the place with blank eyes as nostalgia creeped through his blood stream like poison.

He remembered coming over at least once a week to spend time with Shin and her mother. It had taken him so long to coax words out of her that he wasn't sure how he had managed to give her up so easily in the end. All that wasted time and effort just for him to make an attempt at her life and run.

Itachi had snuck into her old home with ease, and was almost surprised to find the signs of human life littered about the place. He had heard that Shin disapeared from Kohana a month before her death, which meant that there should not have been fresh dishes in the sink, or dirty clothes litered across the couch. There should have been dust, mold, and grime and there should have been a vacant smell. Instead, the place smelled like freshly cooked break and incense.

Had someone broken into her apartment?

Or had she not been living alone?

The latter seemed almost absurd, seeing as the girl's ability with social interaction was extremely lacking, but he did not rule out the option.

Itachi left the journal on the shelf just in case someone had been living there. He could always come back for it later.

Kirin watched him leave, but did not move from her spot on the windowsill. Her beady eyes followed his movements until he was completely out of sight.

"Come out, Kakashi," the raven spoke. The silver haired man walked out from behind the bathroom door, rubbing the back of his head.

"Why do you think he's back, Kirin?" he asked. The frustration that had been building in his stomach and begun to leak through his pours, the events from the past week or so finally catching up to him. The apartment was lacking without Shin there, even if she didn't say much. There had been some kind of peace between the two, a comfortable silence no one else could fill.

"Shin said to follow the ravens," Kirin replied. "To know who she was. Do you know who she was, Kakashi?"

"If Uchiha Itachi is looking through her things, I don't think I ever did."

Kirin nodded.

By this time Kakashi had taken his seat on the couch, his arm draped around the back of it as if he actually had someone's shoulders to wrap around.

"Are you going to tell me, Kirin?"

"You know I can't do that."

Kakashi nodded.

"Very well."