Chapter II
Alchemy and Perverts Don't Mix
"What? What's so bad about Jiraiya?" Edward asked. I couldn't believe how profoundly dumb he seemed. I had to keep in mind he never met Jiraiya before, but GOD! "Jiraiya-dono is a pervert, Edward. He is the lowest of the low, and is no better than Konohamaru." Then Jiraiya, utterly outraged, said "HEY! Konohamaru is plenty worse than me! Besides, I'm one of the sannin, and you better show respect!" Then Edward made things worse by saying "Respect my ass! You're going down, hotdog-sama!" Then began a fight which would go down in ninja history. Jiraiya performed his summoning jutsu immediately, rushing towards Edward with a sword in his hand and an outraged look on his face. Edward simply clapped his hands, touched them to the ground, a pulled a spear right out of the ground! Imagine that! Even more astounding is the fact that he impaled Jiraiya's frog a split second before it could strike! I started to believe that Edward wasn't human at all. Jiraiya's frog disappeared in a puff of smoke, and Jiraiya rushed forward to bring his sword down on Edward's left arm. The sword snapped pitifully in half, and Edward smacked Jiraiya with the broad side of his spear, knocking him out. I was shocked. Then I remembered that he had automail as well. I rushed up to Edward, saying "How the hell did you do that, Edward-sama? Are you a god?" "What? I'm guessing you've never seen alchemy before. You could do this crap too if you knew how." I was starting to get a tingling sensation at the thought of me learning alchemy. I wondered what to do next. Should I learn alchemy? Or should I attempt to teach Edward taijutsu?
A/N: This story is now going interactive! Tell me your decision in your reviews and the majority vote will take place in the next chapter: Painful Teachings!