Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. Maybe just the plot.

Chapter 2

"Teach me?" he echoed.

She nodded, her eyes lit up excitedly. "Teach you how to drive."

No, Haymitch thought. She will most definitely not be teaching him how to drive. He didn't need to know how to drive. It would be useless, a wasted effort. And if he ever had the desire to drive a car, which he did not, Effie would be the last person he would go to for lessons.

The first time he sat beside her on the passenger seat, he had kept his eyes fixed on the road, not trusting her at all. He had sat stiff as a board, the bottle of liquor in his hand temporarily forgotten by the rising panic he felt when Effie started the engine and the car began moving.

"What's the matter, Haymitch? You haven't spoken at all."

"What's there to talk about?" he muttered, trying to hide how uncomfortable he felt.

When he realised that Effie was probably the one of the safest drivers on the streets of the Capitol, he began to relax in his seat. She drove carefully, was sure to keep a safe distance from the car in front of her, she allowed other cars to cut her lane and she even observed the speed limit.

Haymitch had been in enough car rides during his tenure as a mentor to know that even the Avoxes who drove the cars meant for mentors and escorts sometimes lost their patience and weave in and out of traffic.

"No," he shook his head. "No, no that's quite alright."

"Come on. You said live a little, remember? When we first started this project, you told me to live a little."

"What project? And no, don't use my words against –"

"Oh, be quiet and get in," Effie said, urging him towards the driver's seat. She slid in next to him and fastened her seatbelt, suddenly apprehensive.

"Very well, first things first, put on your seatbelt. Safety is paramount, Haymitch. Now, check your mirrors, make sure you can see properly and at a comfortable angle."

Effie then proceeded to tell him about the clutch pedal, the brake pedal and the accelerator pedal. Fifteen minutes into her explanation, Haymitch lost his patience and interrupted her rudely.

"When do I get to drive the car? If I want to hear you talk, I would rather just buy a book and teach myself how to drive."

Effie sighed in exasperation. She pointed to the hand brake showing Haymitch how to release it.

"Okay, now move forward slowly. I said slowly, Haymitch! You can't go on 50 kilometres per hour on first gear!" Effie shrieked as the engine roared.

Aside from the few times where the car stalled when Haymitch released his clutch while trying to change gear, Haymitch proved to be a fast learner. He was now effortlessly changing gear as they circled the parking lot.

"You're getting the basic of it," Effie smiled, patting his thigh. "You can stop the car now, I'll take us home."

"Why?" Haymitch asked like a petulant child who had just been told to put down his toys, hands gripping the steering wheel. "This is fun. I'll drive us to your house."

"You don't have a license. Now stop the car," Effie insisted.

"Live a little," Haymitch replied, laughing softly as he drove out to the main road.

"Haymitch, I don' think that – Oh my goodness, don't do that! Turn on the signal indicator next time."

Effie spent the next ten minutes of her life, holding on tightly to her seat belt and alternating between phrases like "I am going to die." or "Check your blind spot, Haymitch."

"Nobody checks blind spots the way you just showed me. It looks like your neck's going to get all twisted," he snarled at her when she shouted at him for the umpteenth time.

Thankfully for the pair of them, traffic was light at that hour and the route to Effie's apartment wasn't congested with traffic. Still, Effie cringed when a few cars angrily sounded their horns at them when Haymitch cut into their lane without giving any prior warning or signal indicators.

Haymitch turned his head to look at her, a smug grin on his face. "So, how'd I do? Think I'm pretty good at this driving business."

"Keep your eyes on the road." she snapped.

As far as Effie was concerned, that was the longest ten minutes of her life and as far as Haymitch was concerned, he never thought he would feel such exhilaration at being able to drive a car and drive Effie half mad with worry at the same time.

"You're driving too close to the car in front. It's called tailgating and it's absolutely rude to do so. Look, the driver in that car is giving you a dirty look!" Effie pointed out as they both watch the man peered into his rear view mirror looking terribly displeased.

"I would listen to you, sweetheart, if I care, but I don't." He replied as he purposely inched closer.

For the remainder of the journey, they continued very much in that same fashion with Effie trying to teach him the rules of driving and road courtesy while Haymitch ignored most of the things she said. Haymitch knew she was trying to control her temper each time she opened her mouth and Haymitch snubbed her shut.

"You're driving too fast! The brakes! Put on the brakes!"

"Stop shouting at me!"

"I'm not shouting at you. You're not listening to me."

"No, shut up. Shut up." Haymitch snapped at her, one hand shot out to cover her mouth while the other firmly gripped the steering wheel.

Effie struggled and tried to pry his hand off her mouth and as a result Haymitch lost control and mounted a kerb. The car came to a sudden halt as it collided into a lamp post.

Haymitch stared ahead in shock and the sudden silence that just descended on the pair of them was too much in contrast with the chaos they were in a few seconds ago.

"HAYMITCH ABERNATHY! Oh my goodness, what have you done?"

Haymitch's head snapped towards her and he slammed his hand on the dashboard. "What have I done? What have you done? If you hadn't insisted that I learn to drive this wouldn't have happened."

"Excuse me! I told you to stop the car and let me drive instead. But you didn't listen to me! You never listen to me and look at the damage you've caused. You are absolutely -" At that very moment, the worst possible moment, the airbags chose to rapidly deploy themselves, surrounding the duo.

"Oh, shut the fuck up," he grumbled as he swept the already deflating airbags aside, pushed the door open and stepped out. Effie followed suit and began inspecting the damage, muttering to herself in distress about the cost of repairs and how the car Haymitch wrecked was a new Daihatsu Copen, barely 5 years old.

The front bumper was folded in half, the way a charlatan in a circus act would bend an iron bar. As a result, the hood was flung up at such a speed that a hinge was broken, hanging on the other.

Haymitch stared at her with his hands on his hips, watching her circle her car like a hyena would circle its prey. He didn't know what a Daihatsu Copen was nor did he care.

"Oh, that's your apartment. Well, at least we're here," he said grinning at Effie.

She glared at him, opened her mouth to speak, thought better of it and stormed off.

A/N: For anyone who is interested, Daihatsu Copen is a car model. Looks cute enough to belong to Effie.

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