Chapter 1 – insert formula for caffeine here
Author Notes: Wow, two chapters in two days… if I'm not careful, people might start to expect… shudders regular updates! cue thunder and lightning But that won't happen ,as I have personal project comin' up, and in my school it runs like this – You have less then a four out of seven, you fail the year. And before anyone asks, I'm gonna mix perfume for me project and sell it, money goes into a health and hygiene project in Africa.
On to the chapter, and remember to review, or else you won't get mentioned in any Author notes, which will drastically decrease your social status in the counsellors had just discovered, it was the morning of the first of April, and needless to say, they were scared out of their wits. After Morrys and Sasha's revival through a little morning shower, they all hurried over to Sasha's enormous lab, which he had redecorated again a so small time ago that he didn't even get to unwrap most of the furniture. As Sasha frantically clicked through his computer programs, Milla pulled the plastic from two chairs, pulled them close to the huge screen on the wall, and meditated for a short while before asking "Do you remember the Pudding pit of 2003, darling ?" "Yes" was Sashas short answer, "It took weeks to get it out of my clothes. Not to mention my orifices." Meanwhile he had successfully logged into the Mumbling Stone Stalking System, which connected a lot of cameras, microphones, radar screens and a nuclear missile together. Carefully, Milla inched her arm away from the big red button Sasha had installed on his keyboard "to access his music files faster". The big screen flickered to life, and several windows with surveillance video input popped up, amongst them they saw Bobby Zilch showing a weasel down Chops' pants, Dogan talking to squirrels (one of them being the robotic camera they were watching from, and another one wearing a little, perfectly fitting suit) – "I will not ask", Milla remarked on that one – Franke and Kitty looking into teenage magazines, Elton making romantic movements in the direction of the lake, Milka sneaking invisible into the boys shower and Benny re-enacting his favourite scene from "Dumbo" in the forest. Scrolling through the different windows, the three counsellors also saw Nils using clairvoyance on a pair of panties – Which, for some reason, caused the Coach to cross his legs. – , Chloe shooting people with a laser gun and finally Crystal and Clem trying to make the Announcement System play Linkin' Park, or at least cheer to everyone. "Oh my…" said Milla, "it's so… normal…"
"Well, maybe they didn't notice it's" – the coach lowered his voice to a whisper – "the first of April…" "I must say, that is highly probable. Children and teenager in a summer camp often forget the time because they are having", and this last word was spoken as if it had been doing him a personal wrong, " 'fun' ".
He adjusted his sunglasses, and turned around to his colleagues. "But that must NOT mean that we let out guard down!", he said in a surprisingly not-dull tone. "Every year these little pipsqueaks have been kicking our bucket on every first of April. I personally am sick and tired of having to extract sticky fluids out of my orifices and burn my clothing in the woods! I don't want to have my pants stolen and sold on eBay and being offered Milla's dresses as a replacement anymore. Or Morrys, for that matter. This year, they will not get us!" he shouted, "We are Psychonauts, damnit! Even the most insane of all maniacs couldn't get us down !", Sasha continued, a comment that made the Coach shift and mutter under his breath something like "I told him, no giant mutated fishes, but NO…" – Noticing that his colleagues stared at him, he smiled – or at least pulled his mouth into another shape – and Sasha resumed his speech. For some reason, Milla noticed, the screen behind Sasha displayed a waving American banner, and he didn't wear any shirt. Sasha suddenly noticed that too, and psiblasted into a seemingly random direction. An invisibility field suddenly collapsed, and behind it a obese, rabid Fangirl materialized. "SAAAASHAMUFFIIIIIN ! MAARRRYYY MEEEE !" she screeched at a volume that nearly made his eardrums give way, and then she charged forwards. "SASHA MILL IS SOOOO OUTDAYTEEEEED ! MY LOVE FOR YOU BURNS WITH THE INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND SUNS ! ME AND MY OC, SANDRA AMETHYST DARKROSETWINKLESTAR ARE SO MUCH SEXIER THEN THAT FAT, OUT OF DATE DRESSED MILLA, YOU SHOULD MARRY US AND WE'LL BEAR YOUR CHILDREN !" she shouted again, having fallen onto all fours and still accelerating, the foam from her mouth dripping onto the floor and the plastic-covered furniture, where it left sizzling holes in the wrapping. Sasha, having pulled another shirt and jacket from one of his Anti-Fangirl vaults. He stored psychic energy in his temple, and, putting his thumb into the typical I'm-about-to-shoot-you-good-with-my-brain-lasers position, he wanted to charge forward, but suddenly he felt a gust of wind fly by him. One quick glance to his side showed that Milla didn't stand next to him anymore, and when he shifted his gaze forward again, he noticed that the fangirls wasn't there anymore. Instead he saw Milla mopping the floor, her face a grimace of disgust, and a sharp chemical stench tortured his nostril. "Eh, what's that smell ?" Oleander asked, whiffing. "Hmm… Lavender?" "No", replied Milla, "sulphuric acid." A small silence ensured. "Okay, where were we… Yes, we are NOT going to be caught this year, NO !" he resumed his hand, clenched into a fist, crashing down onto the keyboard. "Yes, that's nice, dearie…" Milla replied, looking kind of awkward, "but you just nuked France…" "Who cares ?" Sasha and Morry replied.
Milla finished flushing away what she had left from the Fangirl, and it was no sooner than she had put away mop and bucket as Raz came into the Lab, telekinetically balancing a tray on which he had stuffed some mugs filled with a steaming liquid. The stimulating smell of coffee filled the lab, and Milla could swear she saw Sashas nostrils expand. With a face full of innocence, Raz asked "Coffee, anyone?" and, for some reason, made a very suspicious puppy dog face.
Sasha stood next to the tray in a matter of milliseconds.