Project Hurricane

Just because you don't have friends, doesn't mean you can't have a life. AU.

Disclaimer: I don't Naruto, or any of the songs I used.

WARNING: Contains Pedophilia (NarutoKurenai), Yuri, Cutting, Suicidal Ideation, Mental Instability & Eating Disorders

He walked into English a solid forty-five minutes late. The entire student gasped when he showed up, wondering how the fuck he got so disheveled. He showed the pass to his sensei, which was good enough. No lecture for missing the entirety of class.

They'd finished their worksheet, so he'd just have to do it for extra homework. He spent his ten minutes bored as hell. With a minute left Ino decided to talk to him.

"Hey, Naruto, can I talk to you after school? It's really important." She asked him in the most serious tone he'd heard her use in his life.

"Sure, Ino-chan." He said.

"Hey…how'd you get so messy? You looked fine in Science…" she asked.

"All I can say is its illegal, fun as hell, and extra-credit." He said. The look on her face was so fucking funny, though.

After school…

"So, Naruto…I'm a lesbian."

"I knew that. It was pretty obvious." He stated, like the smart-ass he was.

"Hey, I'm coming out to you! You could at least be supportive…"

"Why didn't you tell Sakura or someone…oh, wait…you're probably gay for her…"

"Well, I need you to be my fake boyfriend…" she asked him.

"Anything in it for me…?" he asked.

"No, not really." She pointed out.

"So, why should I help you?" he asked, implying the obvious.

He was a loser. He had a few friends, and was on the bottom of the social ladder. At heart, Naruto was a good person. Out of pure chivalry, he'd have to do it. Plus it made his behavior look less scandalous. While he spaced out, she found a good reason.

"Are you saying I'm not pretty?" she asked him.

"You're beautiful…just not my type." He said.

"Who is then?" she asked, putting a hand on her hip.

"A girl who's not afraid to tell the truth."

"You're going to do it," She said.

"Yeah. It'd be nice to see a taste of popularity."

At that moment, Haku-chan clicked her phone shut, then looked down. He'd always wondered why she was so weird.

"Haku, you ok?" he yelled at the girl.

"Oh, its fine. My dad's just got this really long meeting, he'll come get me in a couple of hours."

"If you want, you could come over to my place. I could use some math help."

"Sure. It looks like it might," then it started raining. Badly. "Rain."

At that moment, Naruto's mom pulled up in her Volvo. He told her that the girl needed a place to stay for a couple hours, and his mom agreed to keep let her come along.

"So, what's your name?" Kushina (that's his moms name…seriously.) said.

"I'm Haku Momoichi. My dad's got this meeting, and Naruto offered me some shelter."

"What about your mom…?" Kushina asked politely.

"She's dead." Haku said, and then hung her head.

"Are you ok?" Kushina asked with concern.

"I'm fine." She said, sending a death glare that could be felt without being seen.

"So, Naruto, how was your day?" she asked him.

"I got a girlfriend. And I'm doing some extra credit for Geometry."

"Oh, good for you. Who is it…?"

"Ino."

"Oh, that one. Well…I was a friend of her mom…but then her dad…well…he's gay, so they separated and she moved very far away."

"Wow. Too much information." Naruto said.

The rest of the ride was silent.

They went home, they did their homework together, then Naruto went to go play guitar. Haku went downstairs to his room to see what he was doing.

She heard him play, and was amazed. He was playing classical guitar, but on flying v. he had three others by the look of it, as well as a music stand, a shelf full of musical books, and some amps. She then spent about half an hour staring into his deep, blue eyes. Those are why she liked him. No matter how sad she was, they always made her happier.

He put his guitar on his lap after he'd finished playing the 'Mario Brothers Song', and looked up at her.

"Yes?" he said, looking up.

"Oh, nothing." She said, blushing, and looking to the left.

"I thought of something. Your dad's single, my moms single…we could hook them up." He said, with a devilish smile on his face.

"I don't know…your mom is…a bit heavy."

"That's crap. If that's someone's excuse for not liking someone, they're shallow."

"Coming from the one who's dating the most popular girl in school."

"Ah, Touché."

There was a silence…then…

"So, do you have any siblings.

"Yeah, my big brother Kyuubi. He's in college. He taught me everything.

"Cool."

"Hey, Haku…your dad's here!" they heard Kushina say form the living room.

They walked upstairs, and they saw him. Zabuza Momoichi, a well built man of thirty-four. He was dressed in a suit, and had this 'I hate Mondays' look on his face.

"So, we'll go now. Thanks for keeping her dry." He said.

"Do you guys want dinner?" Kushina asked.

"Umm…" Haku had some pausing.

"Sure." Zabuza said.

Dinner went well. As Naruto predicted, their parents hit it off pretty well. They'd sent a silent 'shoo' signal to their kids, so they could…talk. They went back to Naruto's room.

"So, are you and Ino exclusive?" she asked him, flipping a small bit of hair out her eyes.

"I'm pretty sure. Why, are you trying to set me up with someone?"

She looked down, and Naruto changed the subject.

"So, do you think they're going at it yet?"

"Let's check."

They went looking through the house, and found Zabuza's tie hung on Kushina's door handle.

"Well, at least he doesn't have an on switch." Naruto said, chuckling. They went back to Naruto's room, and he pulled a sleeping bag out of his closet, and slept in it. Haku took his bed.