Author's Note: Here is another chapter in this little series. Someone asked to delve into this aspect of things, and I liked the idea, so I'm going with it. P.S. Who else is sooooo flipping excited for the new episode on Monday!? Review if you would like!
They ate a quiet meal that evening as a family, not mentioning much about the actual incident, but talking about the future and what they were going to do with the baby's room.
"What color should we paint the room Alexis?" Castle asks nonchalantly, in hopes of getting her to slip.
She pauses for a moment before answering, glaring at her father, "I suppose that a light green or a pale yellow would be nice."
"I like that." Kate says, oblivious to Castle's attempts and more focused on her food.
"Baseball or Princess Castle?" he says, ignoring Kate's reply.
"Neither… maybe a spring scene." Alexis challenges him with another stare.
"That's a cute idea, Lex." Kate adds.
"Pink or Blue as the accent color?" Castle tries again.
"A white chair rail…" Alexis counters.
"Ooh… and white crown molding." Kate replies.
Martha and Jim had watched the scene unfold before them with much amusement. They didn't understand why Castle was grilling Alexis in such a way, but Kate's obliviousness was the icing on the cake.
"Excuse me you two… what is this about?" Martha asks, pointing between Alexis and her father.
"She knows the sex of the baby, and she's not allowed to talk about it!" Castle says, glaring back at his daughter much like a little boy when he has been punished.
"Richard Castle!" the shrill voice cuts through and everyone turns to look to the unexpected source.
"Kate!?"
She realized about two seconds after Martha asked her question that the line of questioning from Castle had absolutely nothing to do with future nursery ideas and everything to do with finding out what the sex was. "No! You will not grill our poor daughter for information. We came up with this plan and as far as I know, I haven't told her that I wanted to know what this baby is… and per our deal she can't tell us anything unless both have agreed and are present."
"I was just…"
"Nope." She says, effectively shutting him up for the rest of the meal. "Though I did like the idea of a green or yellow room with the white chair rail. Maybe even paneling below it? That would be sweet."
"I love you both." Alexis says as the family finally retires for the evening. Jim had already left, Martha was in her room, so it was just Castle, Kate, and Alexis still up.
"We love you too." Castle says, stepping into the bedroom with his wife.
She sits on the bed for a moment, watching him grab his bed clothes, and letting herself think hard on the day and week they had.
"You're thinking way too loud over there, Kate." He finally says, gently pulling off his shirt and trading it for a tank top that he can easily maneuver over his frame.
"Are we going to talk about it?" she asks.
"No. We aren't."
"Castle…" she says with caution.
"As far as I'm concerned… everything is fine. You're fine, the baby's fine, I'm home, and we don't have to talk about it Kate. I… can't right now… I just can't." he says, finally breaking a bit at the end and sitting next to her on the bed.
She grabs his hand when he sits down, "Then everything isn't fine, Rick. You need to talk about it."
"Give me some time. I just need time to get back into now… then we can tackle it."
She glares at him a bit, through narrow eyes and then realizes that he may be right about needing a little time. So she stands and lets herself get ready for bed.
The second they get in bed he realizes the clavicle break isn't going to be as easy to deal with as he expected.
"Dammit!" he says when he lays down.
"Let's prop your left side up on some pillows so your arm doesn't drop." Kate tells him, seeing his problem.
"But then… I can't…" he starts, allowing his head to fall back on the pillow with an exasperated sigh. "I need to feel you, Kate. I need to feel the baby and I need to feel you… I need to know you're right here."
A tear falls from her eye at that, finally seeing him admit some of the fear and emotions that coursed through him the past days.
"Nope… we'll prop you up on this side and you can lay on your back. I can curl into your right side all you want. I'm not going to let my human oven get away that easily, you know."
"So that's all I am to you?" he asks teasingly, trying to make light of the situation that they were in.
"So much more than that… now we need sleep because I'm sure that neither of us got any the past few nights."
Pregnancy made you pee… constantly. She turned in his arms, seeing that he was still asleep. When she pried herself out of his arms, she quietly made her way to the bathroom, hoping to not wake him from his slumber.
She paused for a moment to look at herself in the mirror afterwards, seeing that her eyes were still red and the bags were still packed underneath them so to speak. That's when she heard it.
"NOOOOOOOOO!"
It was a blood curdling scream that probably woke the rest of the apartment and had her running back into the bedroom.
"Castle! Rick!" she said, reaching for him as he thrashed.
"Don't do this! Don't do this again! She doesn't deserve this!" his continued screams were not helping her get through to him.
"RICK! It's Kate! Come on!"
At that, his eyes snapped open and he searched for her face, pulling her in for a kiss before flipping her onto the mattress so she was on her back.
"Castle, what are you…" she starts, but is rendered speechless when he lifts up her shirt, places a hand on her stomach and then rests his head right beside it on her bump and proceeds to sob.
"Kate?" she hears coming from the doorway and looks up to see Alexis looking at the pair with concern.
"It was a nightmare… he… he had a nightmare." She says, as she strokes his hair while he continues to cry.
"Katherine, should we call someone?" Martha asks.
"Yes…. Um… Dr. Burke… he's in my phone… he was my therapist after the shooting, and… I trust him… Rick will trust him. See if he can get here… Rick has to talk."
Martha nods behind her granddaughter, moving towards the nightstand to grab her phone to call the doctor. All the while, Alexis can't take her eyes off her father, sobbing into Kate's stomach.
"Alexis… go help your grandmother… and why don't you make your dad some tea… it will calm him down later." She says quietly, hoping to get the girl to snap out of it, but not succeeding, "Alexis?"
"Tea… yeah, I'll get some tea." She says, her eyes darting to her stepmother and back to her father before she walks out of the room.
Then her attention is back to Castle, heart breaking as he clutches her.
"Castle, I'm okay…. The baby's okay… you're okay. Come on, Rick… look at me." She says carefully, trying to break him out of this trance.
"The baby…" he says, moving his hand in circles on her stomach.
"Yeah, Castle, the baby is fine… remember we got the picture yesterday and you got to hear the heartbeat."
He nods, still not fully acknowledging what was going on around him.