Hi everyone! I'm back with chapter two! I noticed a few MAJOR grammar errors in my frist chapter, so I hope this story is a lot better. If anyone would be interested in betaing this story for me, please let me know! Thanks for reading!
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Seeing Raj had gone well enough. Well enough meaning that things were incredibly awkward. Truthfully, Howard had been terrified of talking to his best friend after that night. Howard felt that they should at least have talked about it. One does not screw their best friend, especially one of the same gender, and move on without a word. It was awful. Getting Raj alone had been impossible. It seemed that fate was working against Howard; every time the two men were alone someone would call or burst through the door, ruining the moment. Howard had a slight suspicion that this was of Raj's own doing, but he couldn't be sure. The fact that the evening kept playing though Howard's head didn't help either. The thought was constantly pulling Howard from what he was doing and into a daydream; he could feel Raj's hands cupping his face and his soft lips pressed against his. Howard could feel the taste of Raj on his lips even now. The feeling of Raj inside of him was still captivating. The problem had only worsened; Raj had started appearing in Howard's dreams.
They were always in Howard's room. Most of the time Howard was sitting at the front of his bed on his pillow wearing blue pajamas. Raj would be sitting at the end of the bed facing him. They rarely said anything to each other, they just stared. It should have felt creepy but it never did. Raj was always smiling. It was a slight smile, but warm and inviting. Raj would reach up and ruffle Howard's hair. Feeling the bed dip in the center, Howard would realize that Raj was coming closer. Raj's breath would hit his face then and their faces would draw close to each other. It was when Raj's eyes closed and Howard's began to do the same that he would wake up. This 'dream-Raj' would visit Howard a few times a week. Each time Howard woke up from this dream, he would grab his phone and start to text Raj. [We need to talk]. And each time, he would delete the message without ever sending it.
It was a lazy Sunday morning when Howard woke up. He had just had another Raj-themed dream and was still shaky from image of Raj leaning towards him, eyes fluttering closed. They had gotten closer than ever before in his dreams; their lips almost touching. Grabbing his phone, he opened a text to Raj. [We need to talk]. Howard stared at the words on the screen. He wanted now more than ever to press the send button. He pressed down on the send button enough to make the button move, but not enough for it to register on the phone itself. After spending a moment like this, Howard felt the familiar feeling of nausea build up inside his stomach. Throwing his phone aside he went to the bathroom, quickly emptying his stomach. He paused for a second trying to catch his breath before throwing up again. When he was sure that his stomach had settled down, Howard washed his hands. Howard grabbed the red bath towel and dried them off. He went through these motions absentmindedly, more focused on a dream than reality. He stepped back into his room and opened his closet. Reaching into it, he pulled out the first thing that his hand touched. After getting dressed, Howard glanced in the mirror. His shirt was on backwards and his socks didn't match. Not caring too much about the socks, Howard just fixed his shirt. The man was finally ready to leave the house and all he wanted to do was go back to sleep, to dream again.
After a mild internal debate, Howard threw himself back on his bed. He rolled over, feeling something by his back. It was his phone. Hurriedly, he checked his message. It still there, except the message had been sent. Howard paled. Every sound around him seemed amplified. Outside, a bird chirped angrily at something. His mother was snoring in the next room over. Howard checked his phone again. The message had definitely been sent. Howard threw his head against his pillow in exasperation. Finally, after what felt like forever, his phone pinged with a message alert. [Want me to come over?] Howard paused for a moment. He wanted so badly for his friend to rush over to his mother's house and to actually have a long overdue conversation. Instead, he replied: [No. I'm fine. I meant to text someone else] Raj was quick to answer: [Ok.] The image of those words froze in his mind. An invisible force pinched his heart. Raj should have known something was wrong. Or he would have, it Howard hadn't messed up everything by sleeping with the man.
Later that evening, Howard got a text from Leonard inviting him to his apartment for dinner. Howard debated not going; lately he had been exhausted almost all the time. In the end, hunger, and probably the desire to see Raj, won him over and he decided to go. The scooter ride over was pleasant enough. Nothing terribly interesting happened. It was around seven when he arrived at Leonard and Sheldon's place. Everyone was there already and the only vacant seat was next to Raj. Cursing under his breath, Harold sat down next to him, their legs touching. Just this small bit of contact was enough to bring back memories. Harold shivered involuntarily.
"How can you be cold?" Leonard asked him.
"I-I'm not." Howard replied stupidly. He glanced at Raj who was eyeing him suspiciously. Sheldon handed Howard a box of takeout. Howard took it and began to pick at the food, not really eating that much of it. He wasn't hungry, and the smell of the food was getting to him. Most smells had been getting to him lately. It seemed like almost every day to Howard that he was throwing up or feeling nauseous.
"What's wrong Howard?" It was Leonard again. Not wanting to talk, Howard just shook his head. Tonight was one of the few times that Howard had ever not wanted to be in the company of his friends. They weren't doing anything wrong; Howard was just so tired and things were just too awkward between him and Raj. Raj's foot brushed against his own and Howard jumped.
"Chill out Howard," Raj hissed under his breath. Hurt gripped Howard's heart. It was this harsh tone that Raj had been using with him lately. Everyone was staring at him now and Howard didn't know what to do. He had never done well under scrutiny.
"Sorry. I just haven't felt well lately. I'm probably sick." Was all the explanation Howard would give. The others offered him mixed looks of sympathy and returned to what they were doing. Finally, after what seemed like a very, very long night, Howard was leaving. His scooter was parked outside, a welcome sight. He was going home. As he hopped onto his scooter, Howard looked up to see Raj getting in his car. Howard waved awkwardly and Raj returned the gesture. A gentle breeze was blowing. It ruffled Howard's hair and drew his gaze from his friend. By the time Howard looked back to Raj, he was driving away.
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After missing two days of work, Howard decided to go see a doctor. The nausea had lasted for two weeks now and showed no signs of letting up. On Monday morning, Howard found himself once again revisiting his breakfast. He wiped the vomit from his mouth and quickly brushed his teeth before leaving. The doctor's office wasn't too far from his mother's house and within fifteen minutes, Howard found himself staring at the white building. The sun reflected off the windows, temporarily blinding Howard as he tried to park his scooter. After parking, Howard stood up and straightened his green turtleneck. The inside of the doctor's office was plain. Red fabric chairs were lined against a wall and there was a small table located in front of the chairs piled high with magazines. Next to the door was a large fish tank. A small goldfish was the only creature Howard could spot.
"Um, Hi. I have an appointment with Dr. Monroe. I'm Howard Wolowitz," Howard told the receptionist. She was pleasant woman with curly gray hair. The woman nodded and pulled out a few sheets of paper and handed them to Howard.
"Welcome Mr. Wolowitz. Dr. Monroe will be right with you," she said with a smile. After signing the papers he was handed, Howard sat down to wait. It was only about a fifteen minute wait before the door opened and in stepped an older gentleman. His long mustache was perfectly combed into place. The doctor was perfectly bald and reminded Howard of Humpty Dumpty. They walked down a short hallway with walls adorned with paintings of flowers.
"What seems to be the problem, Mr. Wolowitz?" the doctor asked once they were settled into a room. Howard sighed.
"Well, I've been throwing up every day for the past two weeks. And, I'm always tired and I've got this ache in my lower back," Howard explained to the man.
"Let's start with a basic checkup and we will move from there ok?" said Dr. Monroe. He checked Howard's pulse, his ears, his breathing, and his blood pressure.
"Well besides your symptoms, you are completely healthy. It is not the flu. Tell me Mr. Wolowitz, have you recently engaged in sexual intercourse with anyone?" Howard choked at hearing the question. A fiery blush spread across his face, beginning with his ears. Taking a deep breath, he replied, "Yes." The doctor nodded but said nothing.
"Do you think I have an STD or something? Because that's not possible. At least, I would have thought that he would have told me before we, you know…" Howard mumbled.
"No no no! I do not think you have an STD. I am most likely being overdramatic but across the United States there have been four cases of male pregnancies. I was just reading a study, it was quite interesting. Normal men just like yourself came into the doctor's office reporting the same symptoms and it turned out that they were pregnant. Of course, your symptoms are quite generic and could be a number of things. If I hadn't just read the study this morning, I would have never thought of it." Dr. Monroe informed Howard.
Howard's first reaction was a snort of indignation. Then came the nervous giggle followed by an even redder blush. There's no way. NO way. Howard told himself. His heart was pounding in his chest and- did he just forget how to breathe? The florescent light above seemed to intensify and beads of sweat formed on Howard's forehead.
"I see I've upset you. I'm truly sorry. It was a silly notion and should be ignored." the doctor said, trying to dismiss the subject. Howard would have none of that.
"You can't just say shit like that and say never mind! How do I get tested?" Howard demanded, looking at the doctor with fearful, helpless eyes.
"A simple urine test works perfectly. I can prepare one if you wish."
"Yes!" Howard snapped. Rubbing his forehead, the doctor dismissed himself from the room. Once the doctor had left, Howard felt the full weight of his terror set in.
"!" he yelled, throwing himself down onto the patient's bench. The very idea that he could be pregnant was so foreign to him. What would Raj think? Howard shuddered at the thought. On the wall, a clock ticked by at a rate that Howard was sure was slower than usual. Each second seemed to take hours. Footsteps could be heard down the hall and in another painfully long second, the doctor was back in the room. In his hand he held a small test cup.
"I'm assuming you know how to use one of these. The bathroom is down the hall," he told Howard coolly. Howard grimaced; he shouldn't have snapped at the doctor. Gingerly, he took the test cup and followed the doctor's directions to the bathroom. He unzipped his pants and stood in front of the toilet. As fast as he could, Howard peed into the cup. After washing his hands, Howard returned to the room. He handed the cup to the doctor and said, "Thank you,"
"Mr. Wolowitz, you will be fine, I assure you."
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I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! I'd love to get a review if anyone could write one for me! If not, page views are just as good. Thanks for reading.