Handing off the Hamsters

Today was Mace Windu's birthday. Yoda didn't know what to get him, considering that Mace Windu only wanted a full head of hair, which was really too much for Yoda's force abilities to give him. Maybe Mace would like a new lightsaber!

Yoda ran off to do his heart's bidding and buy a new lightsaber for Mace. He stopped in his blurry green tracks. What color would Mace want? Ah, well, it doesn't matter. After all, it's the though that counts. Or so Yoda figured.

Yoda bought Mace a red lightsaber, but bought himselfa mideval battle mace, and a bottle of canned mace. Yoda stashed away all the mace stuff and wrapped the lightsaber up really prettily. "Now, the gift Shaak Ti has bought, I must see," he said to himself and ran down the hall.

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Bariss Offee and her padawan were innocently having tea when a green blur ran by them. "What was that!" Barriss Offee shrieked. "I don't know, but who ever it was will be in a lot of trouble with Master Yoda, you know how he hates running in the halls of the jedi temple," her new padawan commented. "Oh yeah, remember that one youngling, what was her name? Ti 'al," Barriss Offee reminisced.

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Padme was walking down the hall to Anakin's room when she remembered about the surprise party for Mace Windu. She walked quickly down the halls and screamed as a green blur crashed into her, ran over her, and jumped off her head.

Shaak Ti had just come out of the shower when Yoda burst in. Shaak Ti screamed. Yoda shrieked. Shaak Ti scream louder and clutched her towel. Yoda shrieked even louder and clamped his eyes shut.

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Mace Windu, Ki Adi Mundi, and Obi Wan Kenobi were playing black jackin Obi Wan's room. All the lights were off and there were some lit candles around the room. Ki Adi Mundi looked down at his cards and smiled deviously. "BLACK JACK!" Mace yelled at the top of his lungs.

Ki Adi and Obi Wan nearly fell out of thier chairs. "you don't have to yell!" Obi Wan criticized. Then another scream penetrated the walls. "Shaak Ti!" the jedi yelled and ran out, ignoting thier lightsabers.

They burst into the female jedi's room and screamed at what they saw, not so much that it was ugly, but because they were not supposed to be seeing it. The covered their eyes and tried to run out of the room, but tripped over each other and landed on a heap in front of the door.

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The three adult male jedi , tripped over Mace and ran out. Macequickly followd. Yoda also ran outand decided Shaak Ti's room was not the place to be at the moment.

"Where now, will I go?" He asked himself and then a lit lightbulb appeared over his head. "ah-aha! To Adi Gallia I will go!" and he ran off once more.

The lightbulb above his head dropped to the floor, and shattered in a shower of electrical sparks.

Some of the sparks landed on Anakin's jedi robes, unbeknownst to him, and started a small fire. . .

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Adi Gallia was having a peaceful cup of tea when a green blur rushed in. It hit the table and ricocheted off the walls and landed amidst a pile of dirty laundry she had been meaning to do for quite some time now. The green thing moaned and picked itself up.

"Master Yoda!" Adi Gallia cried and began brushing him off and helping him out of the pile of clothes. "Sitting here, these should not be, but on a more important mission I have come on," Yoda reprimanded and informed Adi Gallia, who nodded.

"Coming up is Mace Windu's birthday," Yoda paused. Adi nodded, "Yes?" "Cooking something, are you not?" Yoda asked. Adi Gallia looked confused, "No, why?" Yoda looked at her, "Burning something is."

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Anakin walked by Adi Gallia's room and sniffed the air. "Is something burning?" He asked looking around. He saw smoke behind him and looked around.

"OW!" he shouted and took off into the corridor, only to run into Adi Gallia's door, which opened as he was sliding down to the floor. "Anakin?" Adi Gallia gasped.

"ATTACK THE FLAMING SITH!" Yoda shouted drawing his lightsaber. Adi Gallia crashed into him andtackled him to the ground. "NO MASTER YODA! IT'S ANAKIN!" Adi shouted.

"Sith, he is not?" Yoda asked. "No, it's Anakin, you know, person who grows up to be Darth Vader?" Adi asked. "Vader! Attack!" Yoda shouted and ignited his saber. Adi Gallia dashed into her room and came back out with buckets of water. She threw one on Yoda and the other on the burning padawan.

Yoda glared at her from under his soaking eyebrows. Anakin lay still, reveling in the simple pleasure that is wetness.

Adi Gallia sighed and went into her room. She locked the door behind her.

"Humph," Yoda pouted. "Not the right person to ask was Adi Gallia," He mumbled and ran off.

Anakin used the force to call medical droids to him to heal his wounds, but they couldn't do anything for him so they took him to the medical lab and stuffed him in the bacta tank.

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Yoda rushed around trying to think of who to ask about Mace's gift. Yoda took out his pocket watch and his eyes bulged. "LATE FOR THE PARTY I AM!" He cried and took off toward Mace Windu's room.

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Padme was walking toward Anakin's room when she realized that she was supposed to be at Mace Windu's surprise party. She hurried down the hall and saw a green blur coming toward her.

She let out a small scream and began running away from it. It was gaining. Soon it was right behind her. It leaped on her back jumped onto her head and leaped off it. "EEEEEK!" Padme screamed and kept running.

Something fell down her back and she felt. Her hair had come out of its styling! "He messed up my hair," she said to herself. "HEY YOU! COME BACK HERE YOU!" She screamed after it and sped up.

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Mace Windu was innocently walking down the hallway to his room when he felt a slight scratching on his back, then searing pain on his head. Something bowled him over and he fell to his knees in pain.

Padme ran after the thing and noticed that the blur ran over something that looked like . . .

"WATCH OUT!" Padme screamed as she crashed into Mace. She bowled over him and landed sprawled on the ground. She got up and began running after the green blur, but tripped over Mace once more and fell to the ground.

Mace staggered up and limped to the med lab.

Padme apologized and began running once more toward Mace's room.

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Yoda force called Mace's present from his room.

The box with holes flew from Yoda's room down the hallways and around the corner.

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Mace Windu was walking back from themed labwith Anakin when a flying box with holes came flying down the corridor. Anakin ducked, but it hit Mace Windu in the head. Mace yelped in pain and walked back into the med lab.

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Adi Gallia walked down to Mace's room, but a box with holes came flying down the hallway. She leaped up and caught it midair. It shook and growled and murrrmurred and rumbled and she was about to take it to master Yoda, but it pulled itself out of her arms and flew even faster down the hallway.

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Yoda tapped his foot impatiently in front of Mace's room. "Taking so long it is. Why!" Yoda sighed in exhasperation. He perked up as the holey white box flew around the corner and into Yoda's arms.

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Mace Windu poked his head out of the med lab and looked around. he looked left and right and tentatively set a foot outside. He braced himself for the doomed which was surely going to come. when nothing came he fully stepped outside of the lab. One step. . . two step . . . one-two step . . .

Mace smiled and straightened and began to walk back to his room. He rounded the corner and caught up with Adi Gallia.

"I just had the strangest encounter with a flying box," she commented. The she seemed to realize that this was actually Mace Windu and she pointed behind him, "Look! A distraction!" she shouted and as soon as Mace turned his head she took off and slipped into his room.

"What? There's nothing there Adi Gallia," Mace stopped talking when he realized she wasn't there. He quickly looked around to make sure the hallway hadn't been pranked and he cautiously walked down the corridor to his room.

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Mace Windu opened his door and stepped in, only to find himself surrounded by darkness. He walked towards the lightswitch, but tripped over something small and furry. It let out a squeak and Mace hit the lightswitch.

"SURPRISE!"

Mace Windu looked around surprised at all the people in his room. He honestly didn't think that many people could fit in there, but all the same, he smiled and said, "Aw guys, you shouldn't have."

Shaak Ti, Adi Gallia, Obi Wan Kenobi, Padme Amidala, Anakin Skywalker, Ki-Adi-Mundi, Yoda, Barriss Offee, Aayla Secura, Kit Fisto, and Plo Koon were all gathered there.

Yoda stepped forward and said, "Eat cake we will." when no one moved Yoda parted the jedi like the red sea, revealing a large 3 layer chocolate cake with chocolate icing and chocolate chips and chocolate holding it all together.

"LOOK AT THE CAKE!" everyone yelled and dashed for it. Mace force pushed them all away and took the first slice. He sat down on his favorite chair and began to eat it. He heard moaning and looked over at everyone. Eleven pairs of eyes glared at him. Mace blushed and released his hold on them with a small, "sorry."

When they were free they mobbed the cake, leaving nothing 'cept crumbs. After everyone was safely sitting down with their mouths full of cake, yoda stood with his white box with holes. He walked up to Mace.

"Here your gift is," Yoda said, presenting the box. Mace's eyes bulged and he yelped, "eeeek!" and jumped behind the chair, watching Yoda and the box, but mostly the box, through shifty eyes. Yoda looked at the box, "A bug on it is there?" he asked.

Mace stood and straightened himself. "Ahh, no. Just an . .. um . . . dangerous distraction. Yeah. A dangerous distraction." Yoda watched Mace suspicously. "Get hit on the head with some large object did you?" Mace shook his head and took the gift from Yoda. "Nah."

Mace took the bright pink ribbon off and threw the lid of the box behind him.

Plo Koon was innocently eating the triple chocolate cake, laughing silently at Mace, when a white pointy object hit him in the head. He rubbed the spot and glared at the object. It appeared to be the top to a box. He sighed and tossed it on the floor.

Mace stared at the box and whatever was in there stared at him. He threw the box on the floor as hamster flooded out. Mace counted there to be maybe eight. They rushed around the room in a dignified line to the stereo. From there they formed a hamster ladder and made it up to the knobs.

Mace stared in shock.

Everyone else stared in fear.

Barriss Offee leaned over to Yoda and whispered, "Did the hamsters come like this, or did you tamper with them?" Yoda glared at her, indignant at that last comment.

Meanwhile, in an attempt to get Mace out of his stupor of shock, Plo Koon handed Mace his present. It was relatively thin and very square. Oh, what could it be? ((sarcasm))

Mace unwrapped the paper and looked down at it. On the front was a picture of himself. "Am I really that fat?" he asked himself.

Anyway, as soon as he had started unwrapping the gift, the hamster sensed what was happening and quickly hid under the table so Mace could play his CD.

Mace looked up toward the stereo, looking for the deranged hamsters, and, upon not seeing them, he walked up to the stereo and opened the CD player and put in his CD. It closed automatically and made a whirring sound as it read the data.

The hamsters quickly came out from under the table and gathered around the stereo (now there were sixteen of them) so that Mace couldn't turn the music off. Mace looked at them in utter confusion until the music actually started.

de-o dee pa dee-dee do-do dee-e pa dee-dee do! dee-dee-dee-dee-deee-dee-dee-dee-dee-do da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dee-dee-do!

Mace gasped in horror and other jedi covered their ears. Plo Koon seemed somewhat at peace with this.

Come on ev'rybody! Clap yer hands! Come on ev'rybody! It's the hamster dance!

Shaak Ti ran frantically about the room, searching for a hiding place.

Ki-Adi-Mundi stood and was walking toward the stereo when Shaaki Ti ran smack into him and they both fell over, knocked out from the impact.

Plo Koon, however, had begun to clap his hands along with Yoda.

Bounce in time to the beat, Hey! You don't even hafta move yer feet!

Adi Gallia ran for the door, and, unfortunately, so did Obi Wan, Mace, Padme, and Anakin. Adi Gallia, who was ahead, tripped over the lid of the white box the hamsters had came in and Obi Wan tripped over her, landing flat on his face. Anakin, who wasn't actually looking where he was going, stumbled over this pile of bodies and became on of them. Padme, being a senator and a girl, jumped lightly over them, but landed wrong and twisted her ankle.

Yoda and Plo Koon were bouncing up and down in dizzying circles.

Now just shake yer fang like I seen ya do and spinn'er 'round and feel that groove, yeehaw!

Aayla Secura saw that the door was blocked by three jedi in a pile and crying senator with a twisted ankle. She looked around for a hiding place and spotted Shaak Ti and Ki-Adi-Mundi lying on the carpet like someone had stepped on them and squished and had then tried to throw them in a lake, but missed.

Aayla Secura made a run for the bathroom, the only other room with a locking door. It also happened to be soundproof for some reason she could not fathom.

Kit Fisto however, was already in the bathroom.

Aayla banged on the door. "just a minute!" came the answer. "Let me in now!" Aayla roared. "NO!" Kit shouted. "LET ME IN!" Aayla fairly screeched. "NOT RIGHT NOW!" Kit replied just as loud, perhaps louder.

Yoda and Plo Koon had added strange hand motions to the dizzying cirlces, andthe dancelooked like a twisted tribal dance of some sort.

de-o dee pa dee-dee do-do dee-e pa dee-dee do! dee-dee-dee-dee-deee-dee-dee-dee-dee-do da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dee-dee-do!

Shaak Ti and Ki-Adi-Mundi had begun to awaken just about now and were rubbing their foreheads. "You know, I just had the strangest dream . . ." Shaak Ti started, then realized that she was still there. "EEEEEEEEEEEEK!" She screech and ran for the door. She lightly jumped over the mass of jedi in front of the door, but Mace grabbed her ankle and cried, "Take me with yo!" and this triggered some sort of reaction and all the others making up the mass of jedi clung onto Shaak Ti's feet, ankles, and robes. Shaak Ti tried to pull herself free, but to no avail. She was eventually sucked into the mass.

Ki-Adi-Mundi faired no better. An enraged Aayla Secura had come storming out from the entrance to the bathroom and tripped over him, rendering both of them inert on the floor.

Yoda and Plo Koon had gotten the hamsters to join the festivities and were very sucessful at it.

de-o dee pa dee-dee do-do dee-e pa dee-dee do! dee-dee-dee-dee-deee-dee-dee-dee-dee-do da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dee-dee-do!

Padme, suddenly realizing she was more or less on top of the mass, jumped up, with the intention of getting out, but unfortunately forgot about her twisted ankle, so she twisted the other one also and fainted from pain next to the living mass.

Anakin, now realizing that he was free, jumped up, and, momentarily forgetting about Padme, bolted out as fast as he could.

Adi Gallia and Obi Wan now realized they could distangle themselves, considering there were only two of them, and Shaak Ti, quickly jumped up and ran out, also forgetting about the crying senator. Shaak Ti lay inert on the floor from the impact of four people drawing her into a living mass.

Kit Fisto came out of the bathroom to see Aayla Secura and Ki-Adi-Mundi unconcious on the floor, Mace Windu covering his ears looking like a cat in his chair, the crying senator Padme (who was right next to the door), and Shaak Ti lying right in front of the door like a welcome mat. Kit did not fail to notice that Plo Koon and Yoda were bouncing around in dizzying circle doing some sort of tribal death dance with the hamsters to . . . gasp! what was this heavenly music! Kit felt compelled to join them, and join them he did.

Come on ev'rybody, clap yer hands! Come on ev'rybody, it's the hamster dance!

Mace Windu was lying in his chair, unwilling to stay, yet unwilling to let the three hamster dancing phsycos ruin his room. It's all a nefarous plot. Yes, that's it. A nefarous plot concocted by those three phsycopaths . . .

Ki-Adi-Mundi, who was by now drifting into conciousness, decided to make a run for it. He looked toward the door. The coast was clear, except Shaak Ti was just lying there. He could jumped over her, and, if he did his running just right, he wouldn't trip over Padme, or get stepped on by the two hamster dancers. Wait. Kit Fisto joined them! Ki-Adi-Mundi fainted.

Aayla Secura rubbed her head and crawled toward the door. She decidedly ignored Padme and Ki-Adi's inert body and she jumped over Shaak Ti's body. "I should get a medal for this," she grumbled and ran away from Mace's room.

Padme sensed paranoia from Mace's chair, curious, she leaned over and saw Mace. Mace is paranoid? Padme pondered this and decided this would not be the time to exploit his hamster phobia. She began to crawl over to the door, but Shaak Ti suddenly became concious, ran out, and locked the door behind her. Padme looked for an escape. There should be an air vent in the bathroom. Yes, the air vent! Padme crawled toward the bathroom.

dee pa dee-dee do-do dee-e pa dee-dee do! dee-dee-dee-dee-deee-dee-dee-dee-dee-do da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dee-dee-do!

Mace watched as Padme headed toward the bathroom. Cheater.

Ki-Adi-Mundi rolled over, hoping, that if he played dead and crawled like a worm, no one would notice and haphazardly try to stop him.

Padme made it to the bathroom. She shut and locked the door behind herself and pile the hamped on top of the toilet and piled many towels on top of that. Why does Mace have so many towels? She did not ponder this but, instead, said, "Mace, my twisted ankles are all your fault. I find you guilty and fine you five towels." She picked up five, which she dragged along with her as she climbed on top of this slowly swaying pile, pulled out that metal thing in front of the air vent and crawled through.

musical interlude

Ki-Adi crawled like a little worm across the floor and had almost made it to the door when Kit Fisto, Plo Koon, and Yoda realized that they were almost the only ones there and started to expand their dance. Yoda stomped on Ki-Adi's foot and Kit Fisto dancedon his back. Plo Koon nearly tripped over Ki-Adi's head, but ended up addng dips to the reckless tribal dance of the hamsters.

Mace covered his eyes as Ki-Adi was trampled by hamsters.

Ki-Adi escaped just as the music picked up again and the crazy three quickened their pace. Yoda's clawed hand landed where Ki-Adi was just a moment before in doing a handstand-cartwheel-y thing. Ki-Adi made through the door just in time.

Mace watched the three suspiciously as they circled around him, came close, and backed away. The dance seemed to be revolving around him. In one swift move, Mace jumped out of the chair, tripped over his foot, landed face-flat on the floor, whimpered, and made a run for the door. He dove through and scampered down to the medical lab.

Once there, he quickly found out that the people there were tired of treating him, so they just stuffed him in a bacta tank for seven hours.