Chapter 2: Guts and Rain
The walks were cold; it was really cold as the rain slowly began to pour down, washing away all the pollution aside – washing away all the pain. It hurt yet, it was not hurting too. He was numb and he was used to the feeling of it. It didn't hurt at all but it was aching, it ached but it wasn't hurting him at all. He was numb – he was numb in a painful way.
He took out his phone, ignoring all the crowds that were looking for shelter, and called one of his friends. He was waiting for the call to be picked up; he kept on waiting even though he knew that they were not going to pick it up.
He was tired; he was so tired of life. He was tired of everything – everything in life. If death was the only answer to every problem, he would have died many times ago. He would have died again and again, just to answer the problems. But he didn't have the courage for that. He was tired of life, yet he didn't have the courage to end his life too.
"Weird, huh?" he murmured to himself – laughing to himself. He was laughing a painful laugh to himself.
Was there anything worth living in the world of problems? Was there anything to live for in this place? Why was he alive? Why didn't he die when he was in the accident 10 years ago? Why did they save him just to let him suffer more?
"Tired of life but afraid to die." Again he let out another depressing laugh as if he was laughing to his own self for not having the gut to kill himself.
He walked to the river side and just stood there in the rain with only his jacket on, covering the bruises that were now becoming blue slowly. The little unseen bruises and scratches on his forehead as well as on his face were unseen by the crowds as they were covered with the hoodie. It was bleeding. Everything was bleeding – his heart, his mind, his logic. All of them were bleeding – they were all wounded. All of them were suffering from the down fall of everything.
The honeyed eyes were empty, it were empty as if he had no reason to live at all. He had no reason; he had no reason at all to even live in this world at all. Friends? What was that? He didn't have any friends at all. Were friends one of those that left you alone after they had fun with you? After they had everything they wanted to get from you? If those were what friends mean, then he had a lot of them – a lot of them that he couldn't even count them.
He looked at the sky, the dark gloomy sky that covered the whole city with its darkness – with its tears. He was sad, he was so sad that he had no other way to express it at all. All he had ever wanted to do was dying – die in peace. He wanted to be dead, so he would know if he still had someone who cared for him or not. So, he would know if someone would still go to his funeral or not. So, he would know who still cared about him or not.
It was still early in the morning where the rain started to pour down in the city, it was undeniably cold, but he was glad that he had brought his thick thermal jacket, so the cold weather wouldn't get him at all. For him, being weak to the cold was something annoying as he still had his work that always needed his attention all the time. The crime and suicide rate in that little city were unbelievably high, which was the only reason why everyone called that particular city as the City of Death, the Suicide City, and some even called the city as Criminal City.
"Here we are. Another day in the Criminal City, huh?" the husky voice with a smile on the taller man's face could be seen even from far away in their office.
The man turned his back from the frozen window because of the rain that suddenly poured down without telling at all. The blue eyes were looking at him – observing the man in front of him as if he was dangerous, even though he knew the taller man was not dangerous at all.
"I'm taking my break from this corpse city, Erwin," he told him after a long day in the dark office with nothing to work for as he had finished all of his reports, although there might be a new report coming soon.
The blonde nodded his head with a smile still formed in his face as he knew that the person in front of him was tired and somehow, he was glad that he didn't have to work on anything for one day. But, one of the police detectives was hard as they hardly get any holiday at all.
"You're finished for today. Just go back and I'll do the rest," the golden-haired man offered him to finish his job earlier than before, but it would be nice for him as he had been doing a lot of reports regarding the past cases he solved and all he ever needed was a good-night rest for, probably, two days, just enjoying himself.
The black-haired man didn't say anything in return, but he packed his belongings with some papers of cases that he didn't have time to read of. He wore his black sport coat and put on his brown coat with black scarf around his neck as he knew that the chilling cold outside was something intolerable for him, although for someone else, it was just something normal as it was still somewhere the end of autumn. No where near the chilling cold of winter with, especially, white frozen cold snow that he hated for life.
"I'll see you on Monday. Have a nice day," then he left with his black business bag and a transparent umbrella to protect him from the chilling rain outside – from the chilling reality outside.
Hi! I'm back from the deadliest busy college week and my name is SoranoKuma! :)
I hope you all enjoy this update and I know that I haven't been updating so much. However, please do not be expect me to be uploading anything every week as I have a busy and tight schedule for this quarter. I hope I will do well with all, so I will still have time to update. :)
Anyway! Thank you so much for all the things and still supporting whatsoever fics I make!
Have a great weekend!
- SoranoKuma
