8. Shopping
"Holy fuck, this place is big."
"Don't let go of the basket, KK. I would hate to lose your nubby horns somewhere along the way."
"Suck my creaking bone bulge, asshole. It's a fucking grocery store. It's big, but it can't be that big."
"Big enough to have its own map."
Karkat finally turned to look at his mate, dumbfounded. "Are you shitting me?"
"For once, I kind of wish I was." Sollux handed over the piece of paper that had been in the cart they'd chosen. It was a professional printing of the store's supposed layout, the key for all the different symbols taking up as much space as the actual map itself. At that point, it was severely tempting to turn around and leave. But a troll had his pride and they had both been through far worse than a simple trip to restock the nutrition block. This place was both closer and supposedly cheaper, so sooner or later, they were going to be shopping there. It might as well be now. How difficult could it really be?
Karkat took a hold of the cart (not because he was afraid of getting separated but because he was the leader, damnit) and started down the first aisle.
Three hours later, they reemerged into the warm night, both sylladexes full of groceries and still carrying bags, feeling shell-shocked and more than a little traumatized. If he hadn't been concerned about his ability to get back up, Karkat might have actually fallen to knees and kissed the open ground. Instead, he and Sollux just stared at each other, a strange sense of survivor's guilt surrounding them.
A nervous split tongue flicked over Sollux's lips before he spoke. "So…" he said slowly, like he was testing suddenly unsafe ground. "…online shopping from now on, right?"
Fuck pride in the aural sponge with something hard and sandpapery. "Yeah. This never happened."
9. Hanging Out with Friends
Oddly enough, the twice a perigree movie night was propagated by Dave, who insisted he should not be the sole sufferer of John's terrible movie taste. Since Sollux agreed with the sentiment, it became something all of them did whenever their schedules synced up. More often than not, it was John and Karkat actually watching a movie while Dave and Sollux were exiled to the kitchen for excessive unnecessary commentary. Greasy food and alcohol were typically involved. It was actually kind of fun, so it quickly became a habit.
For a while, it was just the four of them. Then, when it seemed like moirallegence issues would force a cancellation, first Aradia and then Gamzee were invited to join. Rose found out about the little get-togethers and simply started showing up, bringing Kanaya with her. After that, it was hard to keep track of how, when, or why everyone else showed up, but show up they did until it was pretty much a free-for-all.
The actual numbers could fluctuate from gathering to gathering, but there was always an open seat waiting for whoever want it. All in all, it was agreed to be one of Strider's better ideas.
10. With Animal Ears?
The thing was supposed to be a gift for Nepeta, but it was electronic and allegedly worked off brainwaves, so of course Sollux had to play with it first. Only for a little bit, he promised himself as he glanced over the instructions. He was just going to mess around with it for a little bit to appease his curiosity and that was it.
Six hours later, he was still sitting in front of a mirror, playing with the robotic cat ears when Karkat walked in on him. The ears went down even as Sollux smiled weakly. "Uh…hey, KK. This totally isn't what it looks like."
Red eyes narrowed. Black lips parted twice before closing again without letting loose a single sound. Finally, Karkat shook his head. "You know what? I don't give a flying fuck right now. Just put them back when you're done." Then he turned and walked right back out.
11. Wearing Kigurumis
Sollux knocked on the firmly locked door. "KK? Come on, you can't stay in there forever."
"Challenge fucking accepted," came the muffled, stubborn reply.
"Seriously, you can't look any more ridiculous than I do," Sollux coaxed. "I'm dressed as a fucking bee, KK. Complete with wings and antennae. Not to mention there's enough room in here for like four people. I look like a toy someone took all the stuffing out of." There was no response. He knocked again. "Come on. They're not going to start the movie until we're both out there; you know that. So suck it up this time and then we can figure out how to embarrass the hell out of them next time."
He was just about ready to threaten force when he heard some shuffling. "…promise not to laugh."
"Are you actually going to come out?"
"I will if you fucking promise to not laugh, nooksniffer!"
"Okay, okay. Calm down. I promise. I won't laugh." Then he added for good measure: "And I'll zap anyone who does."
There was a little more silence before the lock finally turned and the door opened. Sollux had to bite his lip in order not to smile, coughing to cover up the tickle of laughter rising out of his throat. Karkat glowered from under his happily smiling hood and crossed his arms, showing off the fact the sleeves ended in equally cutesy pincers. How long had it take Strider to find a crab kigurumi in Karkat's size? Probably as long as it had to find something that would fit Sollux's height…
"You promised," the other growled, clearly unamused.
"I did. I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry." It might have been a bit more believable if he'd been able to keep his voice steady and the grin off his face while he spoke.
There was a bit more glaring, then Karkat sighed and rolled his eyes. "I'm not drunk enough for this shit," he muttered, stalking down the hall towards the kitchen.
12. Making Out
For the longest time, they just stared at each other. Karkat sat in Sollux's lap, his hands braced on the other's shoulders. Sollux had his hands resting lightly on Karkat's hips, oddly patient and passive. Both were focused on their counterpart's mouth, yet neither moved.
At length, Karkat snorted. "You know, only we could make a federal issue out of kissing."
"You're the one stalling out," Sollux replied. "There is no issue. Just kiss me." After another beat of hesitance, Karka did, sweeping in and then back out as their lips barely brushed. Sollux grinned a bit. "Come on, KK. You can do better than that."
Karkat scowled and leaned forward again. This time, he actually made extended contact. Their mouths pressed together, soft and innocent until Sollux lifted his head a bit. The move made the contact firm enough that Karkat could feel the other's fangs dig lightly into his lower lip. A shiver worked its way up his spine as a small gasp made them part once more, though he didn't sit back up completely.
"Again." Spoken softly, but with a slightly rough edge that went unnoticed as their mouths connected for a third time. The shiver made a second run along Karkat's vertebrae, pushing him into the kiss rather than away for it like it had before. One of them sighed in contentment while the other made the most embarrassing little moaning sound. Focusing on little details like that didn't seem important at the moment, so Karkat chose to believe Sollux actually made both. What was important was the slightly chapped lips warm against his, the pressure of those sharp fangs rubbing teasingly until his whole mouth felt tingly and hot. He felt slightly dizzy and more than a little warm when he finally pulled away to breathe.
"Again," Sollux whispered, his mouth still close enough that the movement ghosted along Karkat's, who easily fell to the request.
There was no draw back when the need for air resurfaced. Instead, Karkat got brave and let his tongue slide over one of those remarkably appealing fangs. The hands on his hips dug in as Sollux made a breathy noise that neither quite a moan nor a gasp. There wasn't really time to figure out the classification because then there was another tongue rubbing against his. Any thoughts Karkat might have previously held about how gross having someone else invade his mouth were instantly forgotten. That bifurcated muscle slowly slid in and out, almost casually fucking him as it probed every edge. He followed the invader every time it left, shyly at first, then with rapidly growing confidence, until he accidentally pressed against the divergent point of Sollux's split tongue and earned a moan that went straight to the bulge.
Speaking of… Everything between his legs felt wet, loose. The heat and pressure low in his abdomen was caught somewhere between wonderful, uncomfortable, and too much. Definitely too much, so despite his body's insistence for more, Karkat pulled away. Sollux tried to follow after, looking cofused. His face had flushed beautifully and his lips had somehow grown even darker. The psionic light in his eyes had diminished, letting the structure behind it show through. It was incredibly tempting to kiss him again. Before Karkart's will could break, however, Sollux seemed to remember what was happening and why. He took a deep breath and relaxed, leaving himself once more passive under his new matesprit.
The gesture looked simple; Karkat knew better. "You all right?"
"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" was the somewhat unsteady response. "Yeah, I will be," Sollux finally said a bit more seriously. "Just…don't move for a minute, okay?"
"I can get up."
"No." The hands still on Karkat's hips tightened again. "No, it's fine. I'm not asking for anything more. I just need you to stay. Stay with me, KK."
Like he wanted to be anywhere else.
13. Eating Ice Cream
"You are truly a freak of nature," Karkat commented as he watched his mate bypass all the other toppings on the counter and instead open one of the cupboards to fish out a bottle of honey.
"Says the one who drowned their chocolate ice cream in chocolate syrup and then coconut flakes." Sollux stuck his tongue out in disgust.
"At least mine tastes like something other than sugar."
"Honey and vanilla have their own tastes."
"Hey, you two," Dave interrupted from the couch. "If you're going to do your weird ass love-hate flippy thing, get the hell out of my kitchen first. Young Egbert here doesn't need to see that shit."
"Oh my god, don't bring me into this!" John said, beating the blond with a pillow. "And it's not your kitchen, it's my kitchen because I'm the one that does all the cooking. And as long as I don't have to see anything, they can fill whatever bucket they want."
"Wow, John. Way to be culturally sensitive there." Karkat flopped onto the couch with a huff. "Can we just start the fucking movie now that everyone's done ruining their desserts? What," he demanded when Sollux leaned in close. After a moment of staring, long fingers curled around Karkat's chin, turning his head slightly as a split tongue licked slowly at the corner of his mouth. "What the fuck?!" he screeched when Sollux stood up with a wide grin.
"Well at least you taste good in chocolate."
"Hey!" John cried. "I said where I can't see it!"
"Shoosh," Dave replied, papping distractedly in his friend's direction. "This is way better than the movie."
14. Genderswapped (slightly Humanstuck)
"Holy shit, you've got tits!"
"Announce it to the world, fuckass," Karkat hissed, face red with embarrassment. "The people on the space station didn't hear you the first time!"
"I don't know what you're complaining about," Sollux continued, ignoring the retort. "At least you got something. All I got from the boob fairy was these lovely little bee stings."
"Well she can fucking take them back! They're a pain to deal with; literally and figuratively."
"Is that why you're always so bitchy?"
Karkat glared. "There isn't enough ways out there to say fuck you."
Sollux grinned and made grabby hands. "Can I play with them if I take you up on the offer?"
"Unfuck you! Un! Fuck! You!"
A/N: The "Shopping" was literally inspired by the grocery store that just opened up in my town. I felt like a tourist in there. Cookies to anyone who gets the references in "Genderswapped."
