I've rated this fic T for Teen because I'm not afraid to rend flesh from bone and go into gory detail about it.

This is not a full out Zutara. I've placed Katara and Zuko where they are for personality reasons. Yes, Zuko and Katara will get together in this fic, they have to. But I did not write this for the purpose of writing a Zutara. However, I will not deny that I am a Zutara supporter.

Please give me reviews. They're like my crack. And I hate having to go down to the review house when I can get them for free from appreciative readers. Saves money.

I don't own Avatar

Chapter Two

The Never Bloomer

The walk to the matchmaker's home was a long one. Not physically, but emotionally. Katara's heart pounded and despite her best efforts to keep calm she sweated a little. The five girls were expected to walk without tripping, with grace and with demure smiles on their faces. Walking in the tall shoes was hard and tiring, she wished she could have the effect she did last night when she had been inside with no shoes on. She could only do her best. They had to walk in time. Left, right, left, right; and all in sync. She was last in line behind the girls and directly behind Junshin.

Finally the village square came into view and Katara took a deep breath. The five girls fanned out into a line and twirled their umbrellas in front of them as they lowered themselves onto the ground. Hiding themselves from the gaze of the matchmaker, though she hadn't come out of her house yet. It was so she couldn't compare one girl to the other directly. Already people were gathered in the village square, this was a special event, though not every villager was there. But the families of the girls were. Katara knew her family had arrived, though she couldn't see them.

She didn't hear the doors open, and no one made any indication that she had come. So when a dry woman's voice cut through the silence it made her jump, "Greetings ladies." Katara did her best to stifle her squeak of surprise and failed, "Let us begin. Hua Katara." For some reason the woman's dry voice startled her.

"Here!" she shouted a little loudly as she bounced up. The matchmaker was a short woman who was the very essence of feminine beauty. She wore her kimono around her shoulders exposing much skin, to Katara's surprise. Her skin was naturally fair and she bore no makeup except for deep black around her eyes. Poised in her hand was a cigarette, which she smoked through a long thin filter. She must have just taken a puff because she blew smoke out of her mouth in an accelerated stream as she gazed at Katara in mild irritation.

There was a quiet stressful moment while Katara waited to see what the woman's reaction would be, "Come with me." Was all she said. Katara sighed and walked up the few steps into the dark and quiet room. Outside everyone exchanged glances, especially the four remaining girls. Towards the back of the crowd Grangran muttered, "Who spit in her bean curd?" Sokka tried not to laugh.

Katara stood just in front of the closed doors staring at the sophisticated room before her eyes. The tatami straw had been dyed a darker shade than normal, the wood was black brown, and much of the furniture was black lacquered. All around the room were gifts from people all around the three villages. Despite her anxiety she took quick notice of the types of things she saw. Anything decorative or silk was in varying shades of gold, she had many paintings of geishas about her room, and all her furniture was dark. She herself was dark. Her kimono was a dark plum color with black lining, the obi was brown; it was very extravagant. She was very extravagant.

The woman began to walk around Katara like a shark, taking steady draws from her pipe and letting the smoke out of her mouth slowly. Katara did her best not to cough. She used the end of the pipe to tip Katara's head back and poke at her body. She'd been walking so smoothly and calmly that when she suddenly grabbed her arms and spread them against the wall it startled poor Katara into another squeal, "A wife must be quiet and calm." The matchmaker told her. Katara nodded and stayed where she was as the woman inspected her body, "Have you ever lain with a man?"

"No matchmaker." Katara answered automatically.

"Has a man ever forced himself upon you?" she asked again.

"N-no matchmaker." She stuttered in embarrassment.

The woman continued to walk around Katara muttering to herself, "Step out of your shoes and onto the platform." She finally stepped away and walked into the room. Katara stepped out of the tall shoes and onto the raised platform. The matchmaker had obviously been expecting someone shorter, when she turned around she started at staring Katara's neck, "You're very tall aren't you? Not as tall as a man, but taller than most women." In other words not dainty, thought Katara. The matchmaker left her and walked towards into another room. Uncomfortable, Katara stayed where she was. Soon enough she came back with a teapot and two cups, "Please." She said indicating that Katara should sit down. Without the shoes she could once again move gracefully, she sank onto a silver cushion and waited for her instruction. The matchmaker joined her by the table and offered her the teapot, "Pour the tea please."

Shaking only slightly Katara lifted the teapot and poured ever so carefully. She was halfway through pouring the matchmaker's tea when she realized she was receiving another cold stare from her. Looking down at her wrist she realized she was showing too much skin to be proper. Shamed she lowered her sleeve and continued to pour. After that the tea ceremony was uneventful. But then she brought a piece of parchment and a calligraphy brush, "Write a letter to your mother." She said. Katara prepared her ink carefully, but as she pulled it close to dip her brush in she spilled it, all over the matchmaker's beautiful kimono. For a split second Katara wasn't sure who she was more sorry for, herself or the kimono. But then she was sure.

The woman pulled her lips light, her black eyes raged, "I've kept silent on many things. Your way of walking, speaking out… but this." She stood up to yell down at Katara, "This kimono costs more than you will ever imagine! I've seen your type before! Outspoken, unruly, different! Want to know what they do now? They sit alone in their father's houses! Alone, unhappy, suicidal!" Katara tried to get up, but her foot caught on the hem of her dress and her fist slammed down on the table. Right into her teacup. The matchmaker's eyes flared, "Out! Get out!" Katara got up and started to run towards to the door, "Clumsy! Tall! Uncoordinated! Ugly!" Katara threw open the doors and stumbled into the courtyard. She was just beginning to turn around when her shoes slammed into the back of her head and sent her forward into the mud, "Women like you will never marry. Woman like you should never marry! You may produce more of your kind! Get out of my sight! NOW!" The doors slammed shut and Katara's family came around her.

"Katara?" asked Suki, "Katara?" she shook her shoulder lightly, but it only served to give life to her panic. Katara jumped up and took off at a quick run. She was soon home and threw open the doors. She hadn't noticed but her father had gone home early because of his bad leg bothering him. Now he came out to see his daughter, hope evident on his face. They locked eyes for an instant before Katara rushed past him, through the house and into the garden in the back of the house. She didn't even bother to use the stepping-stones as she splashed through the small stream disturbing the peaceful Koi fish and single turtle. When she reached the cherry blossom trees she threw herself into it's branches with practiced ease and worked her way into the most hidden part of the branches. No one could see her, though they knew exactly where she went. The tree was her favorite place for anything. And right now it was her favorite place for crying. She didn't care that her hair came undone and the beautiful pins fell on the ground. She didn't care that the dress was probably ruined. And she definitely didn't care that her tears were messing up her makeup.

Later she saw her family return. She watched as her confused father rushed to his wife and demand an explanation. Then even later she watched as Sokka and Suki left. Sokka ridiculously turned and waved at the cherry tree before he and his wife began their journey on foot back home. It was late that night, the moon in full view, when her father came out to her tree and stood underneath it's eaves. He was looking directly at her without her seeing her. But she could see him. After several minutes of a silent battle she let herself fall from the tree and land on her feet. He looked at her quietly and she wondered if he was angry. But instead Hakoda pulled his daughter into his arms and held her close.


Ba Sing Se was a beautiful city of white marble and water features. Sitting in the middle of the great walled city was a palace in which lived the Emperor of Avatar. Emperor Iroh. The Emperor was a happy man with a smiling face and wisdom etched into every one of his wrinkles. But today he did not smile. He sat upon his throne frowning deeply at the commander before him.

"This is terrible and disturbing news Commander Zhao." Said Iroh on a deep voice. Zhao nodded his agreement sadly, "How is the boy Sozin?"

"Poorl sir. He went to pieces after delivering the message. He's been slowly putting himself back together. Though he's remembered no new information. All he can remember is Ozai and that there were many men and Lu Ten." The old Commander looked sad despite himself. He'd personally talked with the boy and had left with a bad case of the heebie-jeebies.

"Have you sent anyone to investigate?" asked Iroh as he sipped a cup of tea.

"Yes sir…" his silence caused Iroh to turn the full power of his dark on Zhao, "T-they've either returned half insane like Sozin or not at all."

"Ozai is known for his mind games. He could talk a square into a circle if he wanted." It was a silly analogy, but it made Zhao shivered all the same, "What else is being done?"

Zhao flipped open a book in his hand, "We have men surrounding the palace for your protection. Our current armies are more than enough and-"

"No!" Zhao looked up at the Emperor, "Send my troops to protect my people." His voice and face were stern.

Zhao looked at the Emperor stupidly for a moment, "There are not enough men in the armies to protect the borders and individual villages."

"Raise up men from the villages and train them until the coming spring. In the mean time our current numbers will have to do. Anyway, our autumn and winter will force them to stop." With a sigh of finality he poured himself another cup of tea and drank deeply. Zhao waited to see if he would say anymore, "What, would you like some tea before you go? I don't mind sharing, it's my favorite. Jasmine." Zhao laughed a doomed man's laugh and climbed the dais to join his Emperor in a soothing cup of Jasmine tea.


Spring in the land of Avatar was beautiful. Cherry blossoms were in full bloom, gentle showers caressed the land, and women flirted delicately with men from behind folded fans. However the gentle rains and swollen streams caused there to be mud. Lots of it. In the Imperial City there were hired people to attend to the problem. But in the smaller villages everyone pitched in to help.

Katara groaned loudly and pulled with all her might, "Come on!" she switched so that the rope she was tugging was over her shoulder so she could walk forward and pull. Next to her Appa's heavy muscles strained against his harness which was currently equipped with grappling chains. On the other side of him were two village boys, Haru and Longshot. They were all pulling against a stump, which had been yet unmovable for two years running. Katara was ankle deep in thick mud and had long ago thrown fancies, such as being bale to clean her clothes when she got home, to the wind.

Haru had come to Katara's home yesterday to ask that she bring Appa to his farm so he could help pull. But she'd surprised them by coming dressed in a simple white top and gray pants. At first they'd refused her help, but soon they didn't care who was helping as long as all the ropes were manned. She slipped again, but got up quickly to pull again, "Yip… yip!" she said through clenched teeth. Appa gave off a deep whicker that reverberated through his chest as he picked up strength again.

"HEAVE!" shouted Haru, and all three humans threw their weight forward at once. At first it seemed like nothing had happened, but then the stump made the oddest noise, like Thwack! And they all fell forward into the mud as the stump came free. Katara fell onto her hands and was officially covered from head to toe in mud. Beside her Appa rolled upright and stood before shaking an outer layer of mud onto the humans. She stayed on the ground, panting heavily, still in disbelief of what she had done. Up until this morning she'd been planning to drop by with Appa and stay to help Haru's mother. Somewhere along the line they'd gone outside to see that only two ropes were being pulled. She'd originally worn the plain outfit so when she walked Appa home and washed him down she wouldn't ruin anything important. But Haru was calling hoarsely for someone to help them and she found herself down in the mud whispering encouragement to her overgrown horse and groaning as she pulled with all her might. The little extra bit was enough and the stump was free.

"Here." Katara looked up into green eyes and an offered hand. She took it and he helped her up, "Thanks for your help." He said he tried to wipe some mud off her shoulder.

"It's alright." She said with a smile. She didn't see it, but a small blush flitted a across his cheeks, "I should get home. The last thing I need is for this mud to dry, on me or Appa." Jet and his mother saw her to the road, but after that it was just she and her giant horse. The sun had set and the mud was very cold, she shivered and drew closer to Appa, "Well, at least my skin will be lily soft for a few days." She said with a sarcastic smile to herself.

Lately Katara had not been caring about how people saw her. The other four village girls would have nothing to do with her. The matchmaker had refused to see them and left for Yoroido first thing in the morning. No one had heard from her since. Though a rumor was going around that she had sent for her rooms in Muigi to be emptied and that she refused to return. In reply to this she stubbornly stopped her ears and refused to listen. It was not her fault that she was clumsy; the woman had scared her into a stupor. As she walked through the town, trailing mud, she passed Chindan's house. The girl was outside talking with Hokori, but both scowled at her and went inside when she passed. She refused to look at them.

Finally she stood before her own gate and pushed it open. Her family was gathered in the courtyard. The broom was lying next to her mother in the dirt and it looked as though it had been there for a while. Hakoda sat on the raised walkway around the house with his head in his hands as Kana rubbed his back. Both of her parents had letters in their hands. Immediately she knew something was wrong.

"Please." She said stepping in and closing the gate, "What is going on?" Neither her father nor mother would look at her, had she done something wrong again?

Kana stepped forward, "We've received two surprising letters today." She said quietly.

"Good news first please." Katara said automatically.

"Suki is pregnant." Her mother offered, "But Sokka will not be there for the birth, or the pregnancy for that matter. Neither will your father." The last sentence was choked out. Confused Katara looked at her father and spotted the crumbled letter in his hands. It's seal was that of a dragon facing the left. It was the seal of Emperor Iroh, the Dragon of the West. If her father and Sokka were not going to be here, and it had something to do with the Emperor…

"No!" she cried loudly into the silence, "Father you can't. You have already served the Emperor once before and look what it did to our family!"

"It is an honor to serve Lord Iroh and protect my family." He said in a raspy voice.

"Surely there must be something else we can give the Emperor in exchange for your services." Hakoda lifted his head and glared at her, "If you leave you will not come back!"

"Silence!" he cried, Katara whimpered, "Do you know how much dishonor that would bring the family?"

"Who cares about honor?" Kanata dropped the letter in her hand, "Honor! Dishonor! They are just words! They only become real when you let them." Hakoda strode across the space between them and struck his daughter. Kana ran to the gates and locked them before making sure no one was outside them.

"Listen to the blasphemous words my daughter speaks!" he said in a rumbling rage. Katara looked up at her father, she knew she had angered him and did not hold the strike against him, "I have worked hard in life to come to the place I am now. I work to feed my family and fight to protect them. I know my place. But you. You are young and foolish. You stand here before me when you should be in your husbands house, not mine. You've traveled a hard journey by choice. It is time you made the right decisions and found your own place!" he turned and marched into the house without looking at his horror struck wife, his shamefaced mother, or his broken daughter. The atmosphere was horrible enough to make Appa prance nervously, something was wrong in his usually normal life. He looked at all the humans present, trying to find the problem. But all of them glowed with the light of guilt.

"Katara." Kanata said quietly, moving towards her daughter, "Do not listen to your father, he is emotional." She said soothingly.

"No." Katara whispered, "He is right." She grabbed Appa's reins and led him into the middle of the courtyard where she gave him a quick bath before putting him into his stall. Her face downcast, she made her way into the garden. Overhead the sky was rumbling angrily, threatening a storm. Her feet lead her to the base of her tree, but she could not summon the strength in her arms to pull herself up into it's reassuring branches. Instead she sat on the ground and refused to move.

Her family ate dinner with the doors open, despite the promise of bad weather, and spoke loudly for her benefit; "We'll bring Suki here. Sokka is our son essentially." Hakoda agreed quietly. He didn't feel it necessary to include her in the conversation. Halfway through the meal her mother became fed up and left the table. He tried to talk to his mother, but she ate quietly and left him as well. He cleaned the table, usually a woman's chore, and closed the doors against the rain.

Silence fell upon the garden. That is if you counted Appa being restless in his stable and the rain tearing apart to foliage and the nearly audible electric tension in the air silence. But these were things Katara could easily close her mind to. What was really distracting was the wave of emotions crashing around in her brain. Ideas breached the crests in pods of a hundred as larger epiphanies begged to be heard above the calls of their brothers. She shoved her fingers into her ears, but that only made it worse. The only way to silence the onslaught was to face it head on.

"Quiet!" she screamed into her mind. Abruptly the waves stopped their rolling and the many voices of her mind stopped to listen. The ideas and realizations bobbed on the surface of her thoughts and she silently reviewed them, stowing some away for later examination and bringing some out for immediate observation and consideration. The first important epiphany was that she needed to stop having a pity party and start taking action.

Quickly she wiped the tears from her eyes and stood. She felt exposed on the ground so she turned to swing up into the tree. But as she did she noticed her mother and father as they stood in their room. The rain made it impossible to make out what they said. But she saw her father try to embrace her mother, and her mother push him away. Sadly her father blew out the lights to go to bed. Remorse eating away at her stomach, she swung into the sturdy branches of her tree and climbed to thickest part of the foliage and found a comfortable position.

What could be done? She wondered quietly. What needed to be done? Her father needed to stay home. They needed him here. Without him, they didn't get food or money to buy food. All things like that would be put on hold until the men came back. With four, potentially five, mouths to feed they'd be forced to drastic measures. She shivered at the horrible things they may have to do. Of course, they couldn't go to war forever, but…

"If father goes into battle he won't come back will he?" she asked a small branch that swung in her face. It bobbed from side to side, slave to the winds outside the shelter of the tree. But it was enough of an answer for her. Hakoda had never been the same since he had returned from Avatar's last war.

Sokka's father, Bato, and Hakoda had been friends long before the war. Katara and Sokka had known each other forever. Sokka often claimed the he remembered when she was born. And if she thought hard enough she realized he had always been there. Bato had died in the war. In fact Hakoda had been injured trying to protect his friend. Other comrades said that he became godlike in his fighting after his friend died. That was the reason why he felt so much pain now; he hadn't allowed the wound to heal correctly.

Shaking her head slightly, Katara returned to the situation at hand. What could her family spare for the Emperor? The silence in her tree fort abruptly became deafening. She rolled and let herself fall to the ground, landing on her feet was a matter of instinct. The silence was making her feel sick and there was a sheen of sweat on her face from being in an enclosed place in humid weather for too long. She needed the rain to wash it away.

She shivered as she left the shelter of the tree and the cold rain hit her skin. What is expendable? She asked the downpour.

Images flashed before her mind's eyes. Her father sowing the fields outside Muigi faster than the younger uninjured boys. Her mother cooking and cleaning with an efficiency she would never master. Grangran saying the right thing at just the right moment to diffuse the situation. Suki working relentlessly on any task placed before her. Sokka pounding red hot metal in the smithy of Kyoshi making tools and the occasional artistic commission. Then she saw herself. Sitting and watching everyone work. Sokka would have to go to war, but he would be fine. Her father, he would not be fine.

She'd asked the rain, what is expendable, "Me. I'm expendable." She said as her own salt tears mixed with the pure rain, diluting it.


Ok, I'm officially going to be posting Thursdays and Fridays. Post time can be anywhere from very late Wednesday night to very late Friday night.

This was a little hard to write because of the last part. It was such an important factor, her realizing what she needed to do. And also the part that leads to the meat of the story. Anyway, yeah.

Just so ya'll know. When I write I write over the course of a week. Then when I'm done I leave it alone until Thursday and re-read it after a break. This is so I can see all the places I've messed up, grammatically and storyline. Then I run a spell check. If my eyes and word don't catch it, it doesn't get fixed until it's pointed out to me when I listen to my best friend read it over the phone. Also the fanfiction system for posting stories can mess up your document.

Hidden Crap

Although I didn't touch the scene, in Mulan she has a discussion with her father about the late bloomer. I've titled this The Never Bloomer for a reason.

Zhao is a commander in the army, but NOT Zuko's father.

Men in Japan find the wrists of a woman as alluring as American men find their legs. Their necks are like full on boobage. Anyway, when Katara is pouring tea for the matchmaker she shows too much wrist. Which in Japan is like bragging about her youth and beauty.

When I write it is usually very early in the morning and with music in my headphones. Chapter one of this fanfic was written while listening to the soundtrack to Memoirs of a Geisha. This chapter was written while listening to the FLCL soundtrack. It had the sound I was looking for and got me in the mood. I'll always tell ya what music I listen to 'cause it really affects my writing and how the story comes out. I may listen to a single song on loop, or a series of works by a specific artist.

… I feel like I should be babbling… or maybe I'm just trying to take up room. I dunno. I hope ya'll liked it. BTW I LOVE reviews. Please comment on my stories.