'What are you doing here?' Iain asked, finally, making his way over. It looked like it was the end of his shift, and he was ready to go home. Lily couldn't meet his eyes. She had been the one to leave.

'Trying to get work...' She looked to the floor. Iain just nodded, sizing the situation up.

'And who's this?' He asked her, nodding at the child she held. She didn't know why he had to ask. It was blatantly obvious. It was as if he wanted her to say the words.

'This is Jonah. He's... my son.' Lily said, choosing her words carefully.

'Wow. Uh... wow. Never really did see you as a mum, Lily.' He told her.

'I'm not mother material,' She replied. 'I'm... not. So you would have had no reason to.'

Iain's face changed. 'No, Lily... I didn't mean it like that...'

'It's fine, I said it, not you.' She just shook her head, feeling exhausted.

'Well...' Iain put his hands in his pockets. Lily didn't really know what he could say. He certainly seemed at a loss for words. Jonah had fallen quiet too, picking at the fluff on the hood of her coat. She'd snap at him not to, had they been by themselves. They weren't though, they were with Iain, and the reason Lily left three years earlier was because he'd called her heartless. She felt the need to reevaluate her life. It would only prove his point if she even so much as told off her little boy.

'Maybe we could catch up?' Iain suggested, voice still flat.

'Yeah, sure.' Lily agreed.

'Well, okay. I have coffee, tea, squash for-' Iain said.

'He drinks water.' Lily interjected, before she could stop herself.

Iain just nodded. 'Alright.'

-x-

'This is mad. I just... wasn't expecting you at all. How long is it since you left?' Iain asked, placing a mug of tea in front of her.

'Just under three years.' Lily answered. Jonah sat in front of CBeebies that Iain had flicked on the telly. He was transfixed and completely still, much to Lily's relief. At least, that way, she could have a proper conversation without interruption.

'Three years...' Iain repeated, with a slight shake of the head.

'How's Gem?' Lily asked.

'Gemma? Uh... she's good, Lily. She is. Got an apprenticeship in a nursery, now becoming a nursery nurse, though God knows how she got a DBS check appropriate enough with the crimes she committed in her earlier days. Has a boyfriend, he's quite posh though. Probably does her some good. They have a flat together. She's... she's changed.' Iain told her.

'I'm glad she's changed her ways. That is good news. She is a lovely girl though, just obviously been through a lot. Suppose she was in with the wrong crowd.' Lily replied, putting the mug to her lips again.

'That's true. I still don't understand what brings you back, Lily. What about Jonah's dad? I presume you're not still with him? There's something other than work, isn't there?' He looked puzzled, yet his tone was probing. He had a way of making Lily want to spill everything to him, something she found to be quite disconcerting.

There was no sugarcoating things. He might as well find out.

'He is your son.'

Iain looked at Lily oddly for a while, then let out a laugh.

'What you talking about? He's too little, Lily. You've been gone longer than that.' He said, almost as if he felt sorry for her.

'Iain, don't patronise me. I mean it.' Lily's voice was now a whisper - but it wasn't like the toddler would understand anyway.

'Well, how old is he?' Iain asked, still in obvious disbelief.

'Two today.' Lily replied. Iain looked absent as he worked it out.

'How do I know he's not someone else's?' Iain asked.

'Oh for God's sake, Iain.'

'How do I know though?' He looked at her.

'Because you have my word. I hadn't slept with any other man.. when I found out I was pregnant, anyway.' She told him, as if it were obvious.

'Anyway? What's that supposed to mean? So there has been other guys...' He sounded a mixture of hurt and accusing.

'Not when I found out I was pregnant.' She said.

'But since then?'

'What does it even matter, Iain?' She sighed, exasperated. She'd slept with a couple of men since, on a no strings attached basis. Both from down the pub. She didn't like to drag it back up - that time of her life deserved to be buried in her memory, as far as she was concerned. It wasn't his business though. They hadn't been together.

'Right, well then, Iain Dean.. father...' He exhaled, running his hands down his face.

'Sorry about the shock.' Lily said, quietly.

'No no, don't you worry. Here I am, after near enough 3 years, with a child that just so happens to be your son Iain? Never mind that you didn't even know about him before.' Hurt flashed across Iain's face as he spoke.

'How else was I supposed to tell you?' Lily's voice caught in her throat, managing to sound just as lost as she did hurt.

'Maybe don't leave it this long? Just a suggestion.' He threw his hands up in the air.

'I know it's a lot to take in.' Lily said, quietly.

Iain just scoffed. They sat their in silence. Lily turned to look at her son as he, rather inconveniently, plodded to her side.

'Yes, darling?' She spoke.

Jonah locked eyes with Iain then, for the first time. Lily noticed how her son seemed to stare, almost like he knew. Iain stared back, and Jonah moved to hide behind her. That wasn't supposed to happen, Lily thought. Her son was supposed to realise all at once it was his father, and go up to him. Iain was supposed to interact. Nothing happened the way it should have done.

'Hey. Hey, Joey.' Lily whispered, leaning round to face her son. He blinked back up at her, meeting her brown eyes with his own identical (yet smaller) ones.

She glanced at Iain, and saw him looking back. 'Jonah, Jonah. This is your...' She stopped. The worst possible combination of words she could've said. Instead of finishing the sentence awkwardly, she chose to change it. 'Come and say hi. It's okay. This is a nice man. He is mummy's friend.' Lily spoke carefully and clearly. Obviously curious, Jonah peeked his face out from the back of the chair. He quickly moved back again so that he wasn't visible.

Iain chuckled now. 'Someone's shy.'

Jonah peeked out again, and then moved quickly back. Iain did similar, hiding behind his hands and saying 'I see you!' at appropriate intervals. Both of them laughed and laughed. Lily was still a bit nervous, and although it was cute, she refused to let herself bask in the niceness of the moment too much. If there was one thing she'd learnt, it was that things didn't always last. In fact, they rarely did.

'Mama...' Jonah swung round, bored of the game now and slightly out of breath.

'Yes, angel?' She scooped him onto her knee with a small smile.

'Dinky now..' He whispered, twining his arms round her neck.

'I have some water in my bag. Be patient and I will fetch it for you.' Lily told him, gently shifting him so that he was sitting on his own bit of the armchair.

Lily left the room to go into the porch, and searched through her bag quickly, becoming slightly flustered as she couldn't find it. She was gone a while, and Iain assumed she'd popped to the loo while she was out the room.

'I'll go get you a drink.' Iain stood up, clearly not used to dealing with small children. 'What is it you'd like? Milk? Juice? Water?' Iain asked.

He looked uncertain for a while, putting a chubby finger to his mouth. 'Doosy.' He replied, finally. Iain gave a nod as he looked towards the cupboard.

'Blackcurrant, or orange?' Iain produced both bottles. Jonah just kicked his feet against the sofa, a blank expression on his face.

'Well, we'll go with blackcurrant. I always think it's nicer. Your mum might not approve, though. Never mind. I'll put it in this bottle, and what she doesn't know won't hurt her.' Iain rambled on to himself, pulling out an opaque, bright green plastic bottle with a sports top. He diluted the drink and turned round, giving it to the little boy on the sofa. As toddlers do, he took it. Lily came back in from the hallway and scolded him.

'What do you say Jonah?' She asked, a little frostily. He didn't answer. A gentler tone might. have been more appropriate. 'Remember. Manners? You say...' Lily coaxed, realising he may listen that way.

'Ta.' Jonah spluttered, as he choked on the juice a bit.

'Good boy.' Lily handed him a baby wipe to wipe his mouth and hands with, and to Iain's surprise, he did it all by himself. 'And, thanks.' Her eyes met Iain's. He just nodded.

'It's just a drink.' Iain replied, brushing it off as only a minor thing.

'Even so. I don't know where I put his beaker. Must have left it at home.' Lily looked thoughtful as she sat down on the sofa beside her son, her eyes in a trance.

'Never mind. Is that nice, Jonah?' Iain asked.

'Mm...' Jonah replied, which made Iain laugh again.

'Is it water?' Lily asked.

'I got doosy...' Jonah told his mum, almost with a bit of pride.

Lily just sighed. 'Iain, I told you...' She looked troubled.

'Yeah, I know. But it's one drink of juice, Lily. It's very dilute. Try, if you don't believe me.' Iain gestured to the bottle held tightly between her son's hands.

She just shook her head. 'It's fine, this once.' She muttered.

'Won't do him any harm.' Iain nodded.

'It's not about that.' Lily sighed, inspecting her nails. 'Anyway. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I wanted a clean break. I left and then I discovered I was pregnant, not the other way round. It felt like the best thing, because I didn't just have myself to think about.'

Iain just nodded, taking in what she'd said. 'I am going to need to think long and hard, alright? Look. I'll message you later. You might've deleted my number, but I always kept yours.'

'I know you did.' Her voice was a whisper again. He'd called her loads since she left. She always sort of knew that he'd think of her. Sometimes, with people, you get a sense that it's not the end.

'Thanks for the tea, and for Jonah's juice.' Lily took the cup off her son, and placed it on the counter.

Iain took it from the counter, and gave it back to the little boy, not without a ruffle of his hair.

'Keep the cup, alright?' Iain sighed, following them into the hallway. He held his hands up, not really knowing how to say goodbye to her properly.

She picked up on this and felt similarly. Obviously not a kiss. A squeeze of the hand would be too intimate too. Realising that hanging around was silly, she leaned in for a quick hug. Iain reciprocated it until she pulled away, taking her son by the hand and leading him out the door.

'I'll text.' Iain said.

She nodded.