Hello everyone! So I have finally finished chapter 2, sorry it took so long. I must and it this chapter isn't great, but I just can't seem to make it any better. Too much writers block! So I apologise in advance if you are not satisfied with it, hopefully chapter 3 will be better. Anyway, enjoy :)
WorldOfMyOwn24
xxx
Disclaimer - Suzanne Collins owns the hunger games
Chapter 2 - Old Hurt, New Scars
"Time doesn't heal. All that time does is make it more distant, put more space between you and what happened. It doesn't heal anything. I don't know how or what does the healing but it isn't time." Mercedes lackey
When I wake up I am led on my stomach. I keep my eyes close, in fear of what I might find. Instead I try take in as much as possible with my other senses. I can hear a steady beeping, and the murmur of talking nearby. As I take a deep breath, not only does pain shoot down my back, rekindling an ache all over my body, but my nose is bombarded by the smell of disinfectant. I know where I am, I've been here before, and I can't stay. I'm in a hospital.
As I slowly open my eyes, I notice a tingly feeling in my wrist, so I lift my arm to my face and see lots of wires and tubes entering my skin. I try to pull them out, causing a painful sensation in my arm. It appears removing the tubes also sets lots of machines off, as they start making loud and disruptive noises.
Using all the strength I can muster, I push myself up so I am kneeling on the bed, while trying to ignore the agony of my back. I slide one leg off the bed, and then they other, using my arms to hold myself up. Then I push away from the bed and try stand on my own two feet. This works for a second or two before I notice all feeling disappear from my legs, and I crash to the floor. As I fall I not only cry out in pain, but I knock over a tray of syringes off a little trolley that was to the side of the bed. As I lay face down on the floor, out of the corner of my eye, I see the curtain being drawn and I watch a four or five pairs of feet come rushing towards me. I'm not sure what I expected to hear from them, but the harsh, sarcastic tone of voice that spoke to me was definitely not it.
"What the hell do you think your doing sweetheart? Do you really think now is the best time to be jumping around?" I feel myself being lifted onto the bed by three young male nurses. They place me on my stomach, the way I was before, before walking away. An older, and I would assume more senior, female nurse starts picking up the syringes from the the floor. I notice she is shaking her head in annoyance while clearing up, as if I knocked them over just to inconvenience her! Then the male doctor who spoke to me puts the tube back in my wrist. He has shoulder length, blond hair that's clearly going grey, the uneven and stubbly beginnings of a beard; as if he hasn't shaved in a few days, AND he has a lingering smell of alcohol about him. I read his name tag, and I find out he's called Haymitch.
"Don't call me 'sweetheart'" I say bitterly, causing him to give me a smug look and say
"why? Does it bother you, sweetheart?" As I look into his eyes, I see confidence and arrogance, but I also see something else hidden there, that I just can't make out.
"no, it's fine." I say begrudgingly.
"Good" he replies "I guess I better fill you in then." I shrug my shoulders, which he takes as a signal to begin.
"Well, when the ambulance picked you up you were unconscious and you were taken to have surgery as soon as you arrived at the hospital. We used strong drugs to keep you knocked out during the operation and we've kept you under them until now. You've been out cold for the last two days, so add the amount of painkillers your on to the fact that your anaesthesia hasn't worn if off yet, explains why your body didn't want to join in with your great escape plan." Roll my eyes at him, while trying to hide how surprised I am at how long I've been unconscious.
I'm just thinking about this when I hear him pick up a clip board, which is a bad sign. It means he's going to start asking questions, the things I have been dreading the most. I quickly try look like I'm moody, because that usually makes the doctors want to ask the bare minimum.
"Right Sweetheart," he says "seeing as I spent 3 hours doing surgery on your back I think the least you can do is answer some questions." I huff at this making him roll his eyes at me. "So first off, what is your full name?"
I scowl at him before saying "Katniss Everdeen" hoping that he could here every ounce of venom I try to put in my voice. I then hear him carelessly scribble that down. He continues by saying
"...and how old are you sweetheart?"
"17"
This continues for the next few minutes. Haymitch asks me simple questions like where do you live, and I answer them as exasperatingly as possible. I keep trying to escape by asking when I can leave, but Haymitch just ignores me and move on to the next question. Eventually he gets to the one I was worried about.
"so sweetheart, how exactly did you do this?" he says, as he points to my back. I take a deep breath, tying to think of a believable lie. I'm thinking so hard, I'm surprised Haymitch can't hear the cogs whirring in my head. When I do actually answer him I try to sound annoyed and bored at the same time, as if it's such an obvious explanation and I can't be asked to re-tell it. Hopefully it sounds believable.
"well I was getting dinner ready... and I had some hot oil in a frying pan. I was cutting some meat, when I knocked a piece on the floor, so I went to pick it up. As I turned towards it, I caught my arm on the handle of the pan. This meant as I bent down, the pan tipped the hot oil on my back. I then ran out to the pond and led in it 'cause I thought water would help , and I called the ambulance. That was it really." I look at him with a look that almost challenges him to question my explanation. I have always been a good lier, I've had to be, it has saved me a few times from Gale. Whenever I have had people notice my bruises I think of convincing story's and that satisfies their curiosity, but on the odd occasion when I'm talking to someone tricky I give them this look which usually scares them off. However when I look at Haymitch now I can tell he doesn't believe me. He sighs and I know, despite my best efforts, he is going to press me for more.
"Is that right sweetheart? 'Cause if so you better be more careful, I mean i have never see such bad 3rd degree burns, acquired from an accident like that."
"it's true," I reply "why would I lie?" he looks at me with more intensity and seems to know it is pointless in trying to get anymore out of me.
"I don't know sweetheart. Anyway, you need to stay in here for at least the next 5 weeks, maybe more, until your back heals a bit more. Your burns were so severe that the skin won't grow back, and so I had to take a skin graph from your leg and thigh area, to go on your back. You will have scars on your back for the rest of your life I'm afraid sweetheart, and they won't be pretty. When you do go home, you will need to rest. Until then we will be putting you on a morphing drop for the pain. Any questions? "when that sinks in I realise how serious this has become. Gale could have killed me. I can't go back, apart from to get my stuff. Maybe I could visit prim and mum.
I am woken from my deep thought by Haymitch clicking his fingers in my face. So I quickly reply with "Any advice for me?"
He looks at me slightly concerned and then just before walking out of my cubical he says "don't die." And then leaves me alone to my many thoughts and the sound of beeping machines.
It's been 6 weeks since I got burnt. My back still hurts but it isn't as bad. Haymitch says I can leave now, but I have to come back in a few weeks to have the stitches taken out. I still don't know what I am going to do, I have no money, no home, and Gale is probably going to do a lot worse to me when I get back, as he doesn't like it if he looses control of someone, even if only for a small while. I don't really know how I can even leave the hospital as I was only wearing jeans and a t-shirt (and obviously underwear) and when 'it' happened, my t shirt got burnt completely at the back so it is almost like a backwards jacket, and I don't think it would bode well to waLk though the the hospital in my bra. I ask a nurse if there any shirts I could use. When she comes back from lost property she has a shirt that is quite small. I mean I'm quite a small person, but this top would fit a 13 year old. I would feel bad being picky so I pull it on. It rises up and shows my belly button and is very tight around my boobs. I don't like tight cloths, I never feel comfortable in them. I look in the mirror. Suddenly all the names Gale has called me in the past seem to pop up in my mind: Slut, Whore, Bitch, ugly, disgusting, useless... The list go's on. Often he has said that he wishes he had never wasted his time on me. He's probably right I mean what is there to love about me? I am ugly, stubborn, pointless. I hate what gale has done to me in the past, but maybe I do deserve it? I mean I have never had anything good happen to me, maybe it is a sign I am meant to be punished. I don't know. But one thing I do know is that i don't want anyone to see the disgusting burn on my back. I turn round and look over my shoulder into the mirror to see that this top comes lower down at the back, so where it should be covering the owners bum, it just covers my back. I also keep my hair down to hide as much of my back as i can. I run my hands through my hair and pick up my medication and put it in my back pocket. I look at myself one more time and decide this is as good as it's gonna get, and walk out trying to decide what to do.
I'm not walking for more than two minutes when I slam into someone landing flat on my bum, making my pill bottle dig into it, ensuring I get will get a painful bruise. I look up slightly to see a hand being held out to me. I accept it to find the hand strong and firm, yet still soft and caring. I keep looking down and I hear a kind voice say
"I am so sorry, that was all my fault, are you ok?" I look up at the man, and the first things I see are two stunning blue eyes. I accept his hand and say
"oh don't worry it was my fault-" as he pulls me up I loose my grip and so as I start to fall again he goes to grab my hand and the first thing I latch onto is his lower arm, above his wrist. When he steady's me I notice that he has a painful looking burn on his arm, and that when I grabbed it it must of hurt a lot. "Oh my God, I am so sorry, did I hurt your arm? It looks sore." he looks at me almost as if he is trying to figure me out. I notice he has soft wavy blonde hair that seems to be perfectly placed all over his head.
"oh, no it's fine, just another thing on my list of my battle wounds, it's nothing to worry about." battle wounds, does he fight? He can't be talking about a sport, I mean how often do you hear about boxer's who burn their opponents? He see's my confused face and laughs a little before saying "I'm a baker, so I get a lot of burns," he then points to his arm and says "this was from a baking tray."
When he says this I can't help but think that he is lying, I don't know why, but it is something in his eyes. I stand there for a minute then realise that I am still holding his hand. I quickly take my hand from his and say
"So... Your a baker? Where do you, um, bake?"
"Mellarks Bakery. My father and I opened one near hear a little while ago, but the origional is in a small town called seam, in Wiltshire, not many people have heard of it-"
"wait a second," I cut him off "Mellarks bakery? As in THE Mellarks bakery?" the Mellarks bakery was where everyone in Seam got their bread. The family bakery was amazing and it was run by a family that lived in the richer part of town. My dad used to take me there sometimes if he had some spare money. Mr Mellark was the owner of the bakery and the father of the family, and he was one of the nicest men I knew. He always did what he could to make people happy. His youngest son was quite similar. His name was Peeta, and I went to the same nursery, primary and secondary school as him. I remember he was always very kind to me, but then he was always very kind to everyone. He was very popular at school, and he always had all the girls after him. I look the man up and down and it dawns on me.
"..Peeta?! Is that you?"
"...uh, yeah?"
"you look so different, you have changed a lot since I last saw you!" he looks at me slightly confused. A nurse tries to come by with a patient and so we move to the side. As I step into the light his eyes widen and his ears and cheeks turn red.
"is that you Katniss?" he knows my name? I didn't think he knew it when I lived in Seam, let alone that he'd remember me.
"Yes, how did you know?" he raises his eyebrows at this as he rubs the back of his neck with his hand.
"how could I not?" I am about to question him about this when he stops me by saying "So how is London Katniss? I knew you moved away, but I didn't know it was to London." I think about how it's been. It's been a lot of things. London itself is a nice place, not that I have seen much of it. My life, on the other hand, has been nothing worth dwelling on. There have been times when I have been so scared that I have just wished that Gale would finish me off. I have considered running away but I know I wouldn't get very far, and if Gale found me then I would be lucky if I end up in the gutter. Of course I can't say this to Peeta, we were barely acquaintances in Seam, so we are practically strangers now. Not that I would tell him if we were close, he doesn't deserve it. Peeta is too nice to get dragged down with me. So I look at him and try to smile when I say
"Yeah, London, it's been an experience that's for sure." which isn't strictly a lie. Peeta chuckles slightly before saying
"So... How's Gale? Are you two still together?" he looks at me hopefully and for some reason I answer without knowing why I am saying
"No." when he hears this I think he looks a little surprised, although I think I was imagining it. I don't know why I lied to Peeta, but the way he was looking at me reminded me of a puppy who wants a biscuit, and all you want to do is please them. I quickly rectify my mistake.
"Well actually I am, but um.. I'm not.. Happy?" I seem to ask the last part, (which really helps me convince him)
"oh I'm sorry Katniss, I didn't mean to pry. I guess you're just going though a tricky patch" I quickly try to shift the subject off me.
"So Peeta, what are you doing in London?"
"well once we finished school, I started working at the bakery with my family. Then some stuff happened, and dad thought it would be good to set up another branch, so I came and helped."
"wow that's great Peeta, I wish I could just start a business like that" it falls out of my lips before I can stop myself. I haven't told anyone what I want to do in my life, I mean Gale was never exactly all ears to my future prospects. Plus by the time I trusted mum again I left with Gale so I haven't exactly had many heart to heart phone calls with her
"Why don't you?" he looks at me expectantly with those lovely blue eyes.
"Because..because I can't." he looks at me confused. I suddenly feel embarrassed.
"Why not? You are clever enough. Is it money? Because you I could help you out, you know, show you the best ways to get a loan and stuff." He smiles at me expectantly. It's an amazing offer but I could never do it. I decide I've got to get out of here.
"Peeta that's a lovely offer and all.. But I'm just not up for anything like that. I'm sorry. I have to go now, but it was lovely seeing you again" I think I see what looks like hurt flash in his eyes as I turn round and walk out of the ward, down the stairs and out of the hospital. When I exit I go stand next to a lamppost, trying to work out what I'm going to do. What just happened? Peeta was trying to help me and I... He may think that he is helping me but What he doesn't realise is that I am like a house on fire, crumbling to the ground, and that anyone who tries to get close will be brought down with me.
"Katniss?" I jump at his voice, not many people can sneak up on me like that. I keep my head down so I don't have to look at him, or into his eyes. "Sorry to bother you again, but I never really got to know you when we were younger, and I've always regretted that as you seemed so nice. So I couldn't just let you go now I've for the chance to try again. Plus I thought you looked like you could use a friend." I hear him sigh so I look up at him. He puts his hand on my shoulder and I flinch from instinct. I try to hide my reaction but I can tell he saw it because he quickly withdraws his hands. I know that Peeta is waiting for me to make a move so take a deep breath and turn to him.
"I'm sorry Peeta, it's just I'm not very good at making friends, and I'm not used to being offered such amazing things. I could never open a business of my own, I don't even have a job now.
"don't be sorry Katniss, I am in the wrong. Look, I would really like to meet up and talk about this. I think that you will regret not doing this because you are more than capable of achieving it. If after looking into it you decide it's not for you then that's fine. Just give it a chance?" I look into his eyes. I thought I saw an almost desperate look but I know that was just me over thinking things. I know that I am not going to do this, and gale would never let me go. But I suppose there is no harm in trying. I mean Gale is always out of the house at work. Plus Peeta's a great guy and it would be nice to have at least one friend in the world. I sigh and look up at him.
"okay Peeta, I'll try." his face lights up and when he smiles I can't help but feel almost happy.
"oh that is great Katniss, really great! Do you want to meet up tomorrow?"
"um.. Okay then."
"Cool, do you want to meet me at the bakery, if you give me your number then I can text you the new address, 'cause I can't remember it yet.." he stops when he see's me looking down, as if my hands are very interesting all of a sudden. "Katniss what's wrong?"
"Peeta I...I don't have a mobile." he shuts his open mouth before turning on the ball of his foot. He then whizzes back round with a look of triumph.
"You can have my phone, I need a new one anyway, so this way I will actually get round to buying one. It isn't a really flash phone but it does the job. You will just have to let me change the sim card, so that you don't get random calls from people who are looking for me." my throat suddenly feels really dry
"Peeta, I can't take your phone. It's yours."
"Please Katniss, it's like I said, I was gonna get a new one anyway so you are doing me a favour."
He flutters his eyelashes in an attempt to make me take it. I look at him bluntly and when he see's this he adds a cute little pout and clasps his hands together as if to beg. I sigh again.
"Your not going to give up are you?" at this he gets down on his knees and says
"no." I look at him for a few seconds, while keeping in a laugh. Then I give up.
"fine." A big cheesy grin appears on his face when I say this. He stands up before saying
"come on, I'll give you a lift home after we go to town and get you a sim card." I look at my watch, it's 10:00 in the morning, so I have plenty of time.
"um, okay." I say. He walks me towards the car park to a new-ish, silver, Audi A2 and he unlocks it before running round to the passenger side and opening the door for me.
"Ma'am. Where do you wish to go today." he says in a queens English accent, and I force a smile, to show him I like it. I don't think I have genuinely smiled since I left Seam. I didn't smile much then, I never had much reason, but even when it was tough Prim could always make me smile. But when I left, I lost her from my life as well.
"Anywhere you see fit Jeeves." I reply as he bows slightly. He shuts the car door for me, once I am in the front seat, and then he runs back round to the left side if the car and gets in the drivers seat. After putting the key in he starts the engine, reverses out of the space, and then hits the road.
While he's driving I stay silent because there's something on my mind. I think Peeta senses this, because he keeps taking in a breath like he is about to speak but then lets it out again, like he's decided against it. This indecision goes on for a while, so he makes me jump slightly when he does eventually speak.
"Katniss, are you.. Okay?"
"I don't understand."
"Understand what?"
"Why you are doing this, I mean we haven't seen each other in years, and we weren't exactly best-ies at school, so why do this? I'm practically stranger to you, and as nice as you are I don't think you go round giving phones to anyone you meet."
"No, I don't, but your no stranger Katniss, you're special. In Seam I always knew there was something different about you, and when you left..." he paused searching for the right words. "Since realising it's you I bumped into I have noticed that...well.. You don't seem to have that spark any more, and that's what was so different about you. I.. Just hoped I could find it again." I can't believe any of this. I never imagined I would make such an impression on Peeta. No one noticed me in Seam, no one notices me in London, and yet here I am with a near stranger, who is helping me because I'm 'special'. I guess it's just who Peeta is, kindness comes naturally to him. It has nothing to do with me, it's just his nature. I know if I refuse his help that he will think it's because I don't like him or that it is his fault. Although it is never going to work, after a while he is going to realise that I am more trouble then it's worth
"okay Peeta." he seems to relax a little. I need to make sure he knows how grateful I am even if he is only going to help for a little while. "Peeta,"
"Yes Katniss?"
"I want you to know how much this means to me, your help that is, not many people bother wasting there time on me, so thank you." Peeta's cheeeks and ears instantly go red.
"don't thank me Katniss, it's just nice to see you again. Maybe I could meet gale, I am sure he wants to help you as much as I do."
"mmm, maybe" that won't be happening of course, and I know that if Gale found at he would only be happy to help me dig an early grave.
As we approach town I decide not to think about Gale. Peeta is giving me a massive opportunity and I just want to make the most of it while it lasts. But who knows, if this whole thing works out, then this could be a new beginning for me. As long as Gale doesn't drag me down for good.
So that a was chapter 2! What did you think? Please review, even if only to critisize, because it really helps when I'm trying to write as I get an idea of what I need to improve on. Also let me know what you think of the story line or characterisation etc. anything helps. Thanks :) xxxxxx
