Disclaimer: Yes! I'm the genius behind Lost! I also invented the iPod and microwave popcorn! (Incase you can't tell, I'm being sarcastic)

A/N: 10 reviews later we have the next chapter as promised. This story is going to start off slow I'm afraid, but things should get a lot more interesting after about the sixth chapter (there should be nine chapters in all, my ten if I decide to do an epilogue). I do apologise for the slow start, but this story is about Jack understanding more about Kate, and to do that we have a fair bit of back-story to go though. A lot of this is what we all know from the show, but a fair bit of this is 100 original. I hope that you all enjoy it.

LostinNOLA: At first it'll be more journal entries than art, but when we catch up to time on the island I have some great ideas for drawings that will tell Jack more than words ever could, but you'll have to wait and see!

X-Kate-X: Thankfully I got that assignment done and I'm very happy to know that you were impressed!

hersheygal: Excellent idea! I might just use that!

CHAPTER TWO:

Kate's Childhood

Previously on LOST…

So he made a move to close the book, but then he thought;

Kate doesn't need to know.

He'd only have a quick look anyway.

So he turned the page…

LOST

Jack spent the next half hour looking through the sketch pad. He'd come across portraits of friends and family members and landscapes of the area Kate had grown up in.

He turned over a page and was faced with a portrait of, who he thought, was a much younger Kate, but the caption read:

Elizabeth 'Elsie' Jansen

My Little Sister

1983-1989

And on the page opposite this, was the first journal entry Jack had seen that was more than three sentences. It read:

Isn't it funny how two of the most important people in my life shared the same name? Beth and Elsie, my best friend and my half sister, both were named Elizabeth. I gave them those nicknames, as in my opinion, the only name worse than 'Katherine' is Elizabeth! I cannot believe Ma sometimes! Annabel, Katherine and Elizabeth. Honestly, can you get names that are any more boring? It's no wonder that Daddy gave me and Bella the nicknames 'Katie' and…well, 'Bella'. Anyway, it's the 24th of May today. This time last year I was in a coma after the accident that killed Beth, and if you go back even further, it's the same day in 1989 that my little Elsie was murdered in front of me. I just hope that no one reads this and finds out. I'm one of only two people who know that Elsie didn't simply 'fall' down the stairs and break her neck. The other person is the one who pushed her down the stairs in the first place. I know what you're thinking. 'Wouldn't it be a good thing for Elsie's murderer to be put behind bars?' it would be, but who would believe me? Ma would call me a liar and yell at me for making up stories that would cause him trouble. Besides, he threatened to kill Ma if I ever said anything. My first though was: 'Surely he wouldn't kill his own wife?' but then I remembered that he had just killed his six year old daughter, so I kept my mouth shut. I'd better go, I promised Mr O'Connell that I'd teach him how to break in a young colt today. By the way, as usual, Tom was the only one who remembered that it was my 16th birthday today. If Beth were here she'd encourage me to throw a huge sweet sixteenth party, but it wouldn't be the same without her.

Jack was speechless. Her stepfather murdered her sister and threatened to kill her mother if she ever said anything. And this would have been on her twelfth birthday! He had just been given a whole new perspective on the mystery that is Kate.

He kept flicking through the book with mixed feelings.

He came across small entries alongside pictures that read things like:

I've taken up a job at a ranch on the other side of town. I'm teaching people how to break in horses. It pays pretty well. Maybe in a few years I'll have enough to get the hell outta here and go to a good college someday.

And:

Tom's really sweet. One of the reasons I love him so much. He took me on a picnic today. But then he saw the bruise on my arm that I'd been covering up for a while. I made up some story. He didn't say anything, but I don't think that he believed me. I've really gotta think of a better way to cover up the cuts and bruises. I've also gotta think of better excuses. I think 'I fell out of a tree' is getting a bit old.

Jack frowned at the second one. It seemed that Kate had always had a thing for lying. But then he wondered.

How did she get all of those cuts and bruises?

Deep down Jack knew the answer, but he just didn't want to accept the truth.

LOST

There were lots of drawings of her boyfriend Tom. At karate classes, riding horses, climbing trees, in school. Jack realised that that was because she was always with him, and that she drew what she saw. A few times she drew herself, but never her own face. Her head was always turned away and you could only see her hair and the back of her head. It was impossible to mistake the dark curls that were often in a messy ponytail or braid.

It wasn't long after her 16th birthday that Jack came across an entry that really worried him.

It's truly sad when you can't even admit things to your own journal. Tom hates that I don't trust him, but I do trust him. I don't lie to him and refuse to tell him the truth because I don't trust him. It's just that saying it out loud (or in this case, writing it down) is like I'm admitting that it's real. Yes, I know, I'm in denial. I tried to tell Tom the truth the other day, but I got all choked up and couldn't get the words out. God I'm such a coward. So even though I can't talk (or write) about what he has done to me, or even about what I do to myself, I'm going to have a crack at this 'emotional' stuff, for Tom's sake, if not my own sanity (that is, if I haven't already lost it).

So here it is, plain and simple:

I hate myself.

There, I said it (ok, ok, wrote it, whatever).

'Why?' you ask. I'll tell you.

I hate myself because it's my fault that Elsie's dead. Because it's my fault Wayne beats Ma. Because it's my fault Bella ran a way. Because it's my fault Beth's dead.

Wayne should have pushed me down those stairs. I should be the one that Wayne hits, not Ma. If I hadn't said those things to Bella, she wouldn't have left. And I was the one who suggested that we should all (that it, Tom, Beth and myself) have gone to that rock concert. I can't believe that I didn't notice that Beth was drunk, you'd think that I'd of all people notice the signs. I do have some experience living with an alcoholic after all. She was the only one of us that could drive so I should have called us a taxi.

I've wanted to get all of that off of my chest since I was twelve years old, but all of the guilt just keeps piling up.

I just don't know what to do.

I'm scared that if I tell Tom he'll leave, just like Bella did.

But if I don't tell him, he might get fed up with the secrets.

I need help.

But who would help me?

This was another one that Jack had to re-read before it fully sank in.

about what he has done to me…

Once again, Jack was too scared to find out what exactly he did to her.

I hate myself…

what I do to myself…

But it was those two lines that scared him the most.

LOST

A huge thank you to everyone who reviewed, you guys are the best and the reason I do this:

XxLive-Alone-Die-TogetherxX

Pontmercy

Flips

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mikachoo

Ella Jullian

Shellie4

X-Kate-X

hersheygal

LostinNOLA

Let's try for 15 reviews this time!