I'm back, with yet another chapter! Enjoy...
Jack ran into the classroom where the teams would be announced, filled with excitement! He couldn't wait to find out who his teammates would be!
About five minutes later, he was bored. And when Jack was bored, Sasuke had a very bad day...
"Hey Sasuke," said Jack.
"What do you want?" said Sasuke angstfully.
"What's a cow doing in here?"
Sasuke jumped under the desk, and looked around.
"Cow? Where?" he looked around the room, searching for the avatar of horror.
Jack laughed. "Ha, you fell for it again!"
Sasuke's eyes turned red with the sharingan. "Damn it Jack, that's the third time this week!"
"It's not my fault you're afraid of cows!" Said Jack.
Sasuke glared at him. "I'm not afraid of cows...I just don't like them..."
Sasuke then heard heard a loud "MOOOO" from behind him. He turned slowly around to see a cow, standing right behind him.
"MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!" he screamed in a rather girly fashion, and jumped in to the air, sticking to the ceiling.
Naruto took the cow mask off, and laughed.
"What are you doing here, dobe?" said Sasuke.
"Waiting for my team to get announced, teme," said Naruto.
They both glared at eachother, causing electricity to come out of their eyes anime style.
An innocent moth flew between them, and was fried.
Shino looked at the moth's fried body, and a single tear ran down his face. "Rest in peace, brother moth..." he said, silently holding a funeral for the moth.
At that point, Sakura tackled Naruto.
"How dare you torment Sasuke with a cow mask!" she said, while punching him.
Jack rushed to help, but was tackled by Ino.
"How dare you exploit Sasuke's...phobias!" she yelled, punching him several times.
"It's not my fault he's afraid of cows!" said Jack.
"It is so your fault! If you, Naruto and Ryu hadn't played the prank on him several years ago..."
FLASHBACK!!!
Naruto and Jack hid behind a building, and laughed. "He'll never know what hit him!" said Jack. "Too bad Ryu's not here to help, but he's still grounded from the last prank..."
Naruto nodded. "Did you bring the cow?"
Jack nodded, pointing to the cow behind him.
"Strange i didn't notice that earlier..." said Naruto.
Jack shrugged. "Did you bring the Icy Hot?"
Naruto nodded, pulling out some Icy Hot.
Naruto looked around the corner, and saw Sasuke coming, then looked back.
"OK, we'll put operation: Life Scarring into action on three. 1...2...3"
Jack and Naruto jumped out and
A/N: Sorry, this scene has been censored by the FCC.
Iruka glared at Naruto and Jack with his arms crossed.
"What did you do to Sas-ga...I mean Sasuke?" he asked, pointing to Sasuke, who was in the fetal position, muttering something about cows being the bastard spawn of Satan.
Jack and Naruto shuffled their feet, and explained the prank to Iruka.
Iruka choked back laughter. "That's hilariou...I mean horrible! I hope to see you both in detention, starting when school starts again, if i remember it! See you when summer vacation is over..." Iruka walked away.
Jack looked to Naruto and smiled.
Naruto smiled back.
"This is gonna be the best summer ever!"
And it was.
END OF FLASHBACK!!!!
Ryu walked into the room.
"Hi Jack, Naruto, Ino, Sakura, Sas-gay, Shino," he said politely.
"Hi Ryu!" said Sakura and Ino, despite the fact that he'd just dissed Sasuke. He was rather popular with crazed fangirls.
"Wuzz up Ryu?" said Jack.
"Nothin' much, wuzz up with you Jack?" said Ryu.
"Sakura's fist...oh shi..." answered Jack, before Ino punched him again.
"Hey Ryu!" said Naruto. "I'm a genin now! Dattebayo...ow!" he said, as Sakura hit him.
"Hey Naruto, glad to here that!" he said.
"Hn. I'm not afraid of cows!" said Sasuke.
"Then why are you hanging from the ceiling..OW!!!" said Jack, before Ino punched him again. "If Sasuke-kun says he's not afraid of cows, then he's not afraid of cows!" she said.
"I was...um...preparing to attack," said Sasuke, who was kind of in denial about his fear of cows...not that he was afraid of cows of course! He was totally preparing to attack! He's totally not holding a knife at the author's throat right now!
At that moment, Iruka arrived in the room, holding a cup of coffee. "Good morning class, today you will be assigned your..." he looked around to see the chaos that had ensued. "You know, not everyone is here, i think I'll go wait outside for the others.
"HELP!" yelled Jack, before getting punched again. "Look, Sasuke's shlong is hanging out!" he said.
Ino looked, and turned back around to see that Jack was gone.
"Damn it! Why do i always fall for that!" said Ino, looking around for Jack, who was hiding on the ceiling above her.
"Hey, get your own hiding place!" said Sasuke.
"OK!" said jack, henging into a cow.
"Meep!" said Sasuke, before letting go of the ceiling. He landed right between Ino and Sakura.
"Dang it, when I get my hands on Jack I'm going to..."
GLOMP!!!
Sakura and Ino both glomped Sasuke...at the same time.
"My Uchiha spleen!" said Sasuke.
"Get off Sasuke Ino! There's no pigs aloud!" said Sakura.
"Let go, billboard brow!" said Ino.
They began to glare at eachother.
"Oh shnap..." said Sasuke, before Sakura and Ino both grabbed one of his arms, and fought over him childishly.
"My Uchiha shoulder joints!"
At that moment, the rest of the characters arrived in the room.
"Women are troublesome," said Shikamaru.
"No argument there," said Chouji.
Hinata tried to intervene. "T-there's n-no n-need to f-fight," she said.
Ino and Sakura glared at her, and she backed down.
"It's pointless," said Kiba. "They'll only quit if they get distracted by something else...or when Spidey get's tired of making jokes about Sasuke getting injured by them in this chapter," he said. Akamaru barked in agreement.
"That dog looks tasty..." said Chouji, licking his lips in an extremely disturbing fashion.
"...?!" Kiba backed the hell away from Chouji, and Akamaru hid in his coat.
At that moment, a girl with long blond hair, wolf-like violet eyes, clawed fingers, and a wearing t-shirt and blue jeans (I'm not original with outfits.) walked into the room in slow motion.
Ryu stared at her, with wide eyes, and she stared at him. Their eyes met, as if they were made to be paired in a badly written fanfiction.
"Hi," she said, in a soft but confident voice.
"Hi Amanda!" said Jack. "How's it going?"
Amanda smiled. "Hi Jack," she said.
Ryu looked from Jack to Amanda, and back at Amanda.
"Are you gonna introduce me to your friend?" asked both Amanda and Ryu at the same time.
Jack nodded. "Amanda, meet Ryu; Ryu, meet Amanda,"
Ryu went to shake hands with her. "P-pleased to m-meet you," he said.
Amanda smiled. "Nice to meet you too,"
In his mind, Ryu was going thinking: She thinks it's nice to meet me...SCORE!!!
At that moment, Iruka walked in.
"Now that you aren't trying to kill eachother, I shall announce the teams," he said.
Everyone listened intently.
"Team 7, Naruto, Hinata, and Sasuke," he said.
Several gasps were heard in the room.
"Team 8, Kiba, Sakura, and Shino," continued Iruka, causing more shock.
Jack dropped from the ceiling. Sakura and Ino dropped Sasuke. Kiba dropped Akamaru...but caught him. Shino just stood their, not reacting.
"Team 10 shall me Shikamaru, Ino and Chouji!"
Shikamaru shrugged, having already guessed who he was gonna be teamed up with. Chouji cheered, and Ino fainted from shock.
"And Team 11 will be Jack J. Williams, Ryu Kenshin, and Amanda..."
Someone in the room flatulated loudly, obscurring the last name.
"I blame the author..." said Chouji.
"YES!!!" said Ryu, realizing that he was on a team with Amanda, though he h
"We're on a team together!" Said Jack.
"Wait, you're on my team too? That's also awesome!" said Ryu, who hadn't noticed that his best friend was also on his team.
"I know most of you are shocked...and some of you are too injured to have been paying attention..."
Sasuke was definately in the last category. He laid there, waiting for the medical attention he desperately needed. "Somebody...help me..."
Iruka ignored him and continued, and continued.
"...but I'm sure all of you will get to know eachother, and will eventually learn to work together as an indestructible force...well, except for those of you who get eliminated...but you'll discuss that with your senseis tommoro! It's been an honor teaching each and every one of you...except for Sasuke, he was a pain in the arse, but the rest of you were ok," he yawned. "Well, come back tommorrow to meet your new sensei!"
"Wait, tommorrow? What the hell is wrong with this system?!" exclaimed Jack.
Iruka shrugged. "Blame the author..." a random piece of the ceiling broke off and hit Iruka in the head. "Not to offend him or anything!" yelled Iruka loudly, looking up.
Naruto stared at Iruka. "what's wrong with Iruka-sensei?" he asked.
Jack shrugged. "I guess after years of teaching, he finally snapped,"
And so, the possible future Genin walked home, each wondering what their sensei would be like.
A/N: Will Jack's sensei be relatively sane? Will Kakashi's bell test be a hundred times easier without a certain incompetant pink haired weakling? Will Sasuke over come his fear of cows? All these questions will be answered in the next chapter of..."Legend of The Icy Hot Ninja!"
