IMPORTANT NOTES: I'll be revising and repairing any mistakes made in any chapters, but I'm using a word program that doesn't due auto-correct so I can misspell stuff pretty easily. So bear with me people! Take note of the amount of emotions going on with these two as well; Armin isn't meant to be as mentally stable as he used to be; its part of the story. Let's face it: In the series he's been through some crazy bull-shit and he's injured on top of that. Lets say there's some mental scarring there, realistically speaking. Annie is relatively in the same boat too, so yeah.
Enjoy it anyway people!
THIS CHAPTER HAS BEEN REVISED... Again.
Arc 1: The Wager's Fool
Episode 2: The Game's Interlude
~000~
"Beautiful, isn't it Annie?"
Annie vacantly (if not guiltily) stared back at none other than Armin Arlert himself, active enough to be both awake and sitting propped up on his undamaged elbow behind her. Her gut dropped away almost painfully, his unerring expression focused on her more so than the stars. The thought made her face burn with frustration, but she credited herself with being a real pro at keeping her inner emotions bottled up. Armin mustn't have been asleep at all she figured, if anything dozing the whole time. Her expression pinched up at this, a little abashed and moreover aggravated that Armin might've been conscious long enough to quite possibly caught sight of her red-ringed vulnerability. Looking away, she forcefully leveled her infuriation to a minimum and chose not to reply as her shoulders went stiff with unannounced apprehension. Being caught star-gazing wasn't so bad, it was just that he'd been staring at her when he said it.
Seriously, how long has he been awake?
Armin twisted his chapped, bitten-through lips into a weak lop-sided smirk that appeared to be barely more than a pathetic twitch upon seeing her reaction. His expression was a little too all-knowing for her comfort. He must've guessed by now that she's been wearing her heart on her sleeve the last while, trying to resolve her internal discomforts in silence.
He then asked in a low-tone murmur tell-tale of his condition, "...What? Did I say something weird or were you still contemplating making my death wish a reality?"
"That's not funny Armin," she hissed.
"I never implied that it was."
Annie shivered in such a subtle way that Armin thought he'd mistaken the observation. Trying to change the subject, she asked in a bilious way, "I thought you were going to die in your sleep?"
The injured Scout found his gaze arrested onto the blood-stained coat spread over him, shaking his head at some unforeseeable thought, "...I thought the same. Unfortunately, you're making it very difficult for me to die so easily. I would've thought you wanted that after all I've done to you; emotional blackmail aside."
Annie bristled at the memory, but then shrugged in a half-hearted way as if to let it go. "You should be grateful I did even that for you," she almost sneered. "I could've let your stupid ass die and I wouldn't have cared if you did."
"As nice as the gesture is, why did you bother to mend my wounds if you say you didn't care?"
Annie wondered if he was always so mouthy after he stirs. She made sure that she had as little inflection as possible in her next response; a practice she'd finely perfected, "Then neither of us could try our next hand in this little wager of ours. After the Hell you've put me through back then, I intend to pay it back in full, Arlert. I couldn't quite live with myself otherwise."
Her reply seemed to pass right over Armin's bandaged skull completely. Somehow, Annie knew without sparing a single glance over her icy shoulder that the flaxen-haired soldier was actually smiling more and more with every second that ticked by. This annoyed her greatly. If anything, he seemed amused by her connotation of trying to act as cold as possible. He kept his mouth shut and chose not to elaborate on her decision thankfully, but it made his amiable aura suddenly palpable and caused for Annie's skin to crawl in an unpleasant way.
It was bad enough she hadn't forgiven the smart-ass for betraying her dual nature to Commander Whats-his-face, let alone herself for sparing him multiple times. She internally told herself to never do anything 'nice' for Armin ever again. The last time she did something like that it costed her greatly; imprisonment and indeed the aforementioned blackmail aside. She really hated him in ways that she could never shake off, but it still hadn't been enough to help her carry out the act of killing him. She questioned what she saw in him that compelled her not to follow up in the idea. The odd query and flimsy reasoning for it arose from a more alien part of her psyche.
Seriously, what is wrong with me?
She tried not to display any of her thoughts flitting about like an enraged hummingbird on her face, turning to stare at Armin with a prim look that he wasn't unfamiliar with. She exclaimed rather crossly, "I mean it when I say this: I don't intend to be so lenient with you whenever and whatever the next circumstance of our bet takes place. No matter what form it takes, no matter what happens, and no matter who the fuck is involved, I will make my ends right. I saved your stupid ass on a whim Arlert; and its a whim that'll be for my own benefit."
Annie suddenly felt some satisfaction bubble up from within her upon seeing his expression fall, his humored aura no longer so smug. He didn't move after her finalized answer, remaining propped up on only one of his elbows at this point; but his round face seemed every bit as disappointed as could be. Eventually, he settled for staring at the grass in consternation, his lips parted slightly. At this, she believed herself settled for the first time since her awakening and returned her attention to their puny fire roiling along its pit. Prodding at it, a short silence was met.
However, she hadn't expected Armin to say something so soon after her promise. "Is that it? Really?"
The inquiry made Annie's gut tighten; Armin's voice was every bit as flat as paper in an attempt to mask whatever else he may be feeling, but it was abhorringly difficult to read it when it got that way. Still, she thought the quality of it held some semblance of hurt in it, giving the illusion that he might actually be saddened by her statement. It wasn't angry, or disappointed, or judgemental, but trully upset by her answer.
Why should he be?
Armin drew in a necessary breath, his exhaustion still clinging to him. He then asked, "This promise of yours; was it meant as a threat?"
She scrutinized the hissing flame, her eyes narrowed, "And what if it is? Are you trying to make a point here?"
Armin settled himself back into his supine position, his one eye brighter than earlier. With an enigmatic stare he leveled right at her, he said, "You meant to absolve my curiosity with intimidation just now, but it wasn't all that successful. Your earlier, more violent behavior back in Stohess felt more genuine to be honest, and I think it could've actually silenced the conversation more effectively. I wonder though; its also contradictory to what you've done for me a short while ago, patching me up and all. Back in the expedition and Stohess, you still never tried to out-right kill me whereas you proceeded to attack and flatten everyone else. That is a strange way of carrying out your obscured mission if I do say so myself. Care to explain, Annie?"
He's breaking me down like I'm some easy-to-read animal. Smart ass bastard.
"Why do I have to explain myself to you?" She tossed him a well-honed scowl that normally without fail laid a conversation between her and anybody else to rest.
But Armin was always the wayward scholar with the plan, pushing his strides further than most, "I'm not convinced this bet of ours has anything to do with your unwarranted actions towards my self-being."
"Where are you going with this?" She fought to keep the snarl out of her monotone.
"-The point is; did you say that only to convince me that your intent really is what it is, or was it really a way to remind yourself about your precious mission?" He paused just then, as if for dramatic effect. Before Annie had a chance to answer he added almost in an undertone, "...Or maybe it's something far more personal?"
Annie's eyes went from icy to downright flinty and hateful in less than a second, her voice taking on a more choleric hiss, "Ask another question like that and I'll rip out your slimy shit-smelling guts from your mouth and shove them where the sun doesn't quite shine."
Her tone was all Armin needed to hear in order to drop the subject thankfully. Still, he directed his thoughtful expression towards the shining skies above and said more lowly, as if he's mocking her, "...I knew you were a nicer person than you let on, Annie."
YOU FUCKING-
She nearly blew her top just then considering her extremely delicate temper as of now; the only reason she hasn't buried him already was because she'd truly acted upon a whim. That snarky numbnuts was probably still suffering from brain damage and bloodlessness she pegged, so she'd been underneath the impression that he'd shut up with the logical shit. Annie mutely hoped that he'd become stupid from said injuries as well, but things were never that easy. If anything, his mind was even clearer and his boldness even more glaring.
Trying to reign in on her anger, she concentrated on their campfire and attempted the cool-down exercises she used whenever her frustrations got the better of her in early on in her life during training. Sometimes Armin was just so puzzling to her it rubbed on her nerves like sand-paper on a bad burn. He was smart enough to pretend to act dumb at the best of times while others he'd just be so obviously intelligent that it made speaking to him difficult. It made Annie feel like a stupid teenager who thinks they know it all was trying to hold a sophisticated conversation with a wizened sage of countless years.
And to think, this fucker was a whole year younger than she is, maybe more.
Another pause in the meantime quieted the two, Annie trying to keep their tiny flame a lit while Armin was so painfully silent she believed he fell asleep again; perhaps dead she added as an after-thought. She never cared to check considering she didn't want to touch him anymore than she had to that night, having her fill of being elbow-deep in his blood as it is. Time slithered by at snail's pace, probably minutes or hours for all she knew but the waning moon has moved in signifigant margins by the she checked it.
The awkwardness of the pause eventually subsided into something that bordered along peaceful, but remained terse as the two sat forlorn in the middle of the plain. Her temper now simmering down back to its usual lukewarm manner, Annie kept her eyes on their fire as her wild thoughts jumped around possible solutions to their dilemma. Annie would never admit to herself that under normal circumstances she needed Armin's superior tactical thinking in order to figure out what they should do next, but her stuffy pride kept her mouth zipped shut. Still, hoping Armin would die while she had her back turned probably wasn't such a good idea; she needed him to help her out somewhat.
Trying not to dwell on the many although similarly horrible outcomes of their situation, Annie shook off her unease by occupying her hands with something else. She sifted through Armin's things next; looking between his 3-DM gear to his survival pack. She sighed at the sight of the damage sustained to his equipment, realizing grimly that they'll have to do without it. She returned her attention to the tiny pouch next, seeing what it contained and how well utilized each tool would be. To her fantastic disappointment, their inventory was the cracked flask, the knife used to trim Arlert's clothes, the box of first aid she'd largely used on his heavy bleeding, some matches, and oils that were supposed to light fires or lanterns.
It was a pitiful stock to say the least, and it lacked the food she'd been hoping she might've overlooked the first time she searched it. Cursing where Armin couldn't hear it, she threw herself back onto the grass in a dramatic manner, her mood plummeting to new record lows. Staring heavenward, she tried to ignore the prominent grumble echoing from her tightening innards; hunger always made Annie Leonhardt a very volatile person.
Oh fuck me. I sure did get the shit-end of the stick ever since the expedition; letting that Arlert live was my greatest mistake ever. I should've let him bleed to death while I had the chance.
Armin shifted in his make-shift bedding and glanced at her, picking up on her metabolic need as if he read her mind. With a grim realization, he noted that he didn't have anything in his belongings that can placate said hunger; either for her or himself. He still began tentatively, "You know, I have a fla-"
"Already saw it. It was cracked to near uselessness. It has a mouthful left," she bitterly interrupted.
"...Oh."
He merely looked up at the stars again and breathed; his brain sluggishly trying to work itself back to its semi-normal, constantly buzzing motion. He then tried after a whole other minute, "Maybe we could try-"
"If you know what's good for you," she spat with some genuine venom. "-I'd recommend you shut up."
And so he quieted.
The two ended up keeping their gaze on the spirals of twisted off-white branches of stars above, dolefully reflecting on what they can or cannot do. Some time ago, Armin would excitedly point out the existing constellations and the histories each had, asking his current companions what shape they liked. Without being so forward about it, he'd then ask them what kind of life they'd wish to lead if they hadn't been soldiers. Eventually, he'd gently urge them to speak about their dreams and help elaborate on the topic as well. And then its from there, the conversation would somehow end up on the most taboo of subjects; the world beyond the walls.
Armin was most comfortable with talking so openly in front Eren and Mikasa of course, but sadly they weren't here to enjoy the meticulous harmony of the skies with him. Hell, even Jean would be pleasurable company in his own stuck-up hard-nosed way. He was friendly enough and he'd encourage Armin to speak his mind. Jean was an honest person who largely refrained form judging others based on their dreams with the exception of Eren, who he indulged on purpose. Funnily enough, even Eren had mumbled that the 'horse-faced' bastard can grow on you about as well as a festering canker sore; his version of saying "I like Jean enough to not hate him".
Armin had to shake off the passing images of his possibly-dead companions. The mere remembrance of them made him heart-sick and left the boy even colder in his fingertips than when he'd been dying. Annie noticed his more subtle motions and almost plain-as-day thoughts hovering around in his head, but didn't say anything about it. Her own mind elsewhere and on territory that used to be considered 'dangerous' for her.
After a few more minutes ticked by, Annie was strangely the one to speak up, her confusion leaking out from behind a normally stony mask. She inquired while keeping her voice as flat as paper, "Do you really honestly think me a nice person?"
Armin focused his somewhat blurry eyesight on her, "Eh?"
The girl kept her eyes centered on a certain star as she reiterated, "I asked if you still see me as a nice person after all that's happened... Because I don't see it."
"See what...?"
Deaf motherfucker.
"Why I'm so nice to you, you dumbass," She raised her voice a bit, her patience pretty much absent today.
Armin twitched his nose at that insult, but he didn't seem put off by it. "Oh. Right," He mumbled. He worked his jaw in deep reflection before he said, "...Hmmm. Well, I'd thought you of all people already understood that."
Annie harrumphed next to him.
He lifted the corner of his lip a little and peered back at the sky, "I could bluntly say, 'it's because you saved my life', but its more complicated than that. Actually, now that I think about it, its not even that at all."
"...How so?"
"You tell me," he mumbled mystically.
"Smart-ass."
With a soft hmf he cracked a slightly larger smirk, his bright stare still primarily arrested on the constellations above. The corner of his vision was trying to gauge the girl next to him, trying to see why she'd ask such a question or bring up such an old topic.
With a sigh he continued, "...Well, I guess it is because you did saved my life not once, but on multiple occasions actually. The reasoning though stands in question, and when I say 'you tell me', its because only you can answer that with confirmation."
Annie finally decided Armin was worth her gaze. She turned to face him fully for the first time that night other then dressing his wounds and propped herself on her arms, her back to the withering fire. Her crystaline eyes were still eerily shadowed by the angry crimson veins around her sockets, but not as strongly as before. She said nothing, but her attention indicated for Armin to proceed.
"-I know I said that you can be the only person to say why, but the impression you left me started back with our meeting at the gear-inspection," he took in another breath. "You respect people's conviction obviously. I say this because you acknowledged my courage by saying I have 'guts'; although in truth, we both knew I was still a weakling at heart. While being able to conceal your own personal feelings on the idea, you expressed a genuine concern for those interested in the Scouts, like myself. You never wanted to kill those you felt was worth your praise; people who have that same sense of courage. Its not a usual trait I suppose."
"How would you know that?" She couldn't help find herself asking.
He gave a stronger smile than before, even if it was still faint. "Eyes tell a thousand stories," he mused. His next sentence almost sounded resigned, "I saw that look on your face when I said I had my heart set in joining the Scouts. Well, other than the fact you did spare me when we met in the next expedtion as proof."
Annie glanced away.
Armin then added in a slightly more confident tone, "...Here's what I think: You probably admire and encourage the conviction some people have, seeing how you lack the trait yourself. Whenever a resolute person has their beliefs challenged, you feel like that trait is worth protecting: Seeing how you spared me and took the time to train Eren, I'd say that's the case. It's unique, and gives value to their individualism and survival. But I know it can go even further-"
He shuffled his shoulder and placed his hand over his chest, his eye still watching the skies above. "Not many have the courage to stand their ground against a Titan, or have the ability to change this corruption that's taken over the Walls; so its a rare to find someone with such strong convictions. The few that you respected you chose to spare, despite what it could happen to you in the long-run; my being here is example of that. As to why you put such individuals in such high regard though... I think it might have something to do with your current position as an enemy. I'm still not sure if its right, but its a guess."
Annie blinked at him slowly as a response to the statement, her expression losing its bored edge and revealing a slightly intrigued look. She raised a thin eye-brow and blew out some air; lifting away one of the hanks of hair in front of her right eye.
Armin, upon seeing her expression shift felt encouraged to continue, knowing she was interested to hear his thoughts. So he supplied, "I can only guess you're heavily compromised because of your role as a Titan Shifter being used to target humanity. Our enemies, the people you work for, or whoever they are have a use for you that completely if not utterly removes the ability to make decisions so critically based on resolve. You don't have this free-willed attribute for that reason... I think."
Annie clucked her tongue at what Armin explained, but he just kept on going without much notice, "You carry a heavy burden, having a mission you don't wish to reveal to possible friends or allies. You've tried to keep your distance for the better benefit of eliminating any detection while keeping the people you trust safe... But then again, you probably just didn't want to associate with them because they were livestock to the slaughter to come. So why name the animals you're going to butcher as the saying goes." He frowned at the statement, but nodded to it in the end, "Maybe that's why you avoided socializing back in the Cadet Corps; if its just for that reason, I think I understand the logic."
Armin's mouth kept on running like untapped water, all the while Annie's face had slowly morphed from the typical expression of bored contempt, to interest later and then steadily forming into the perfect picture of shocked silence. Armin had been able to almost wholly guess on mere speculation as to why her behavior was the way it is and it was just too intimate.
Or maybe too close.
Armin's voice picked up a slightly deeper and more pensive note as he said, "What I've gleaned from our last meeting in Stohess was that after the gesture of taking my plea for help, even if you knew it could be a trap, you still decided to go out on a limb play along. I know you're smart enough to pick up on deceit, so its fair to say you did know well enough that my plea was a snare. The proof was in you putting your ring on after I asked."
His head turned towards her and his eye flicked to the glimmering metal on her hand, sitting at rest on the grass. "Even though you suspected that the plan was possibly aimed towards you, you went along with it anyway because a part of you wanted to seem good to somebody after all the crimes you've committed. Doing something kind for somebody else makes you feel just a bit more human; seeing how all of your wrongs are something you regret." He wore a hooded look after saying this, as if he realized something personal. He then looked away from her as if shame itself was scorching its way into his mind like a hot iron brand. He bit his bloody lip the next second later, as if truly saddened by his manipulations of her back in Stohess.
Guilt is so easy to pick up of him.
He then murmured more to himself, "...It's quite possible that you simply wanted to find an opportunity to capture Eren, but after you've said 'I can at least look like such a nice person to you', it gets me thinking. Maybe it matters more to you that you'd leave some sort of good impression on somebody despite it all. Your isolated nature makes it so that everyone wouldn't have anything to do with you, but it bothered you more than you let on." He paused, his brow dipping lower than usual as if the thought didn't sound quite right. Nonetheless, he moved past it, giving a mild shrug.
"Being alone," he began again, his voice reflecting some sort of reminiscent tone. "-It can hurt at times, and it can leave someone desperate for some sort of contact, no matter how much it endangers your life." He kept his owlish eye dead-locked on a single star above, his mind wandering towards a likely reason for Annie's solitary nature. He must've found said reason when he started slowly, drawing Annie into his words with its calm timbre. "When I was a kid... back in Shiganshina before I met Eren, all I had was my grandfather. Having just your family is nice and all, but then you see the other people going about their business around you and it feels like you want some of that normality to happen to you. It just sucks the life out you when you're alone all the time, you know?"
He'd barely looked at her at all during the explanations, leaving the girl to wonder if he was in some sort of pensive trance. Still, Annie nibbled on her lower lip without Armin's notice after this claim. She felt exposed by his conjecture after he finished explaning, but she'd asked for it. He was merely giving his thoughts and evidence on the matter. And sadly, his words couldn't have been more accurate; having a single figure in her life has prompted her to reach out subconsciously, and thus Mina'a influence on her life. For Armin, he had just his grandfather and Eren, so the boy's thoughts weren't without some sound logic.
If you remove some of the finer details, you start to see the similarities between us. I think I'm starting to see why we understood each other at some point. Dunno if that's the way to say it, but it doesn't seem wrong.
Armin's voice brought the shifter back to the present, his hands now resting on his chest while he watched the descending moon. "...You know, Annie, with all of that said, I think I can safely say yes to your earlier question. You are a nice person, even if its just to me for all I know. Even if you'd tried to kill most everyone else, Jean and Mikasa included, it doesn't neccessarily define you as a bad person to everybody. You're good to me, and that counts for something." His face suddenly tinted a few shades redder seconds later, as if he was now just realizing what he'd just said. He somewhat squeaked next, "...A-at least, that's what I'd think... after all that... I guess."
A larger span of silence stretched far longer than the last, Annie's intense set of sapphire orbs sightlessly lingering on Armin, her mind elsewhere. She looked like she was having an internal debate, the look hovering about on her face leaving the boy to wonder if she was going to snap out of it and strangle the last bit of life out of him. It was really creeping him out. After a while though, she turned away yet again, her eyes softening and the trajectory of her gaze aimed towards the cavernous skies above. Her head shook slightly, her hands migrating over to rest on her breasts. She was seen biting her lip in a way that left the weary soldier perturbed for a moment, having never seen her make the gesture like that during a conversation before.
"Armin..." she began, in a soft voice he never imagined hearing.
"Yeah?"
She didn't follow up. Having let her voice trail off, she couldn't find anything to say to him after all that. She settled for watching the skies for few minutes more, leaving Armin to wonder what was going on in that complicated head of hers. However, it was her next expression that appalled him to near alertness, her mouth finally moving and curling as her eyes fluttered shut briefly.
She began to laugh.
It wasn't just any laugh either; it was almost the very same weird and insane fit that left her rolling a little ways away from Armin, her muscles bunching together and her loose hair a golden halo around her scalp. It didn't have quite the same quality the last one did but it was something close, and it was making the boy more confused than before. She laughed deeply, her torso shuddering and her hands untangling from each other in order to hug herself so she can keep from rolling either into Armin or their dwindling flame. She kept this up for at least a minute before it had faded into something softer and more sane.
To say that Armin was completely unnerved was putting it mildly.
He sat up, even though it was a major chore to do so, but once he was up he rested an arm around his waist and the other on the ground to keep himself propped up. He looked onto Annie's formally maddening fit in a puzzled way, his mouth agape and his uninjured eye going from perfectly round to half-lidded in the strange and mixed appearance of deluded mild surprise. He didn't dare speak when she was like this; he didn't wish to invoke her anger if he did. He waited out her terrible convulsions like it was a routine seizure, and then it was only once she too was sitting up that he tried to gain the courage to speak.
"Ann-"
"Armin," she said again.
He stifled his mouth as she let her arms fall to her lap, her eyes brilliantly aglow in the dim amber stillness of their camp. Keeping her attention fixed on the grass, her mouth still shaped into that odd and uncharacteristic show of a smile, she asked in a soft lilt, "Am I... No, do I really look like that to you? Seriously?"
He couldn't respond, so he just nodded.
Another sniff like a passing aftermath of her mock joy from earlier escaped her. "...And here I thought Mina was the only optimistic idiot I'd ever tolerate," she tittered on. "-Here you are Arlert, telling me about how you see me as such a nice person because of my stupidity as a failed attempt of my being a warrior. Providing all of this logic as proof and somehow making me out to be so glaringly obvious a person... Calling me human, making mention of my mistakes like its such a normal thing, making me sound like a lost soul stumbling its way through this hellish rat-hole we call a reality. It's so stupid, but flattering in a way. Actually, it comes off as rather funny to me."
"...It ...does?"
She looked at him more directly, but it was mostly under the fringes of her platinum blond hair. "I won't deny that there's some truth to your words. I actually do tend to admire other people's resolve, and you were also right about me choosing to be caught in your treacherous ploy. However, I'm afraid that's where your assumptions end."
Her face suddenly seemed older, her smile vanishing and her eyes sunken and dark. Her voice grew ever quieter as she went on, her voice turning into a whisper at the end, "I was no longer a warrior then... When I spared you from a fate that could've left you a bloody smear in the grass. I lost my identity then Arlert; my image of a well-trained warrior fit and ready for any challenge. Do you understand?"
He gave a slight tilt of his head at this.
"...A part of me hopelessly believed that I can act like a normal human being at some point during training in the Cadet Corps. But I was reminded of my position in this useless fight against the Titans during the Trost incident." She ducked her head even lower, "I willingly gave up my role as a warrior because I admired your hateful, dirty, slimy, twisted guts; your courage to die although you didn't want to, for a race's sake that was rendered unsavable long ago. Admiring a person's loyalty to a death wish was... stupid of me."
Another snort escaped her.
"Hmmph. I've tried to run from the most dangerous situations my whole life. I went with the flow of the world, helping along the chaos that ensues for my own sake. What did I get out of this?" She leveled her stare somewhere impossible to touch, her eyes almost bulbous in the hollows of her face. "Armin, I got nothing but one sad, horrible accident after the other. I had Mina once, but she's no longer here," She lazily waved it off. "Eren and I... Training him was... amusing but short-lived. I can only imagine what Jean would do to me if he knew what I did about Marco."
"Wha- Wait, you know how Marco...?"
She still didn't look at Armin but she moved her shoulders as if to shrug, her voice a low drawl. "He'd blame me for something I didn't do... Well, more like didn't want to do. It was an unsavory incident that I didn't have much control of, I think. It was stressful, Armin, but I guess that's no excuse."
A dry chuckle came out of her next, her eyes weary. A distinctive sniff was heard following up, "He... kinda just learned about us and panicked... It was so horrible, Armin; the way he begged and pleaded with us to let him talk. We had to stop him for our own sake, not to leave to chance that he'd might tell somebody about us, but killing him... Oh God damn that fuckin' Reiner sometimes." She spat the last sentence out in a scathing manner. "-I threw away his gear, leaving Marco suspect to a passerby Titan. But that was his idea; Reiner's I mean. Not mine. And then that fucking stupid head-case decides to just cry about the boy he said not to feel compassion for...? The hell does he think he is?"
She trailed off, leaving Armin to imagine the rest. Plainly, Annie felt remorse for the incident, and it was easy to see that in her stifled attempts in forcing back the long-forgotten tears. It was still just was so strange to watch Annie Leonhardt of people getting so over-whelmed by a death like Marco's; a guy she barely knew.
"The other trainees..." She murmured. Armin looked back up her and listened to her unhinged banter. "...They were interesting to say the least, but a part of me still felt like an outsider during the years I spent being surrounded by them. I looked at all of them and drew a conclusion from each in order to encourage me to stay away from them. It worked for the most part, that is except for a certain few."
"A 'certain few'...?"
Annie pulled her legs closer to herself, her voice without now feeling again, "I still don't care for most everybody. For instance, Christa seemed nice, but she was faking that good girl bit and it grated on my nerves immensely. I never said anything about it, but it was annoying. Ymir's so far up Christa's ass its no wonder she's the color of shit." She paused when she heard Armin snort at this. Annie fought the urge to smirk herself after that. Keeping her eyes on her knees, she went on, "Mikasa's just unreasonable whenever it came to Eren whenever we trained; she'd lurk around like some unholy shadow. She especially hated it whenever I gave Eren a hard lesson."
She gave a little huff at this, as if in bemusement. "-I didn't much like her personality to begin with and what she came off as anyway. Jean was an egotistical asshole through and through. Sasha along with her chrome-dome accomplice were brainless. The others... Pfft. As far as I can tell, everybody, excluding Mina, absolutely loathed me or were completely intimdated. I never cared if they died, so you were right in saying that they were 'animals to the slaughter', but there were exceptions. Eren's interest in my technique, as well as your courage and his. His suicidal views, the way you tick, its what I found to be of more... interest to me. You weren't quite wrong about that," She trailed off like her brain decided to shut off.
Noticing the odd way she was acting, Armin went on to ask, "...Aaaannd what about Reiner? You really hate him that much? Even when he's an accomplice to you?"
"Yep," came the stiff answer.
Armin was taken off-gaurd by her straight-laced reply, but he'd apparently guessed that much from the girl's earlier comment about Marco.
"He thinks he cares about all of you, but he's more of an ass than you could ever believe. He only really cares for Bertholdt and our lost home above all. Anything happens to ol' Bert and he WILL be beyond all voice and reason. I could flip him over all day and never be satisfied," she had added with some apparent dryness in her tone. "I swear to the stupid Walls he was losing his mind the more time he spent around you. He acted like Armored-Titan warrior Reiner one second and then the perfect soldier boy the next. Bastard kept projecting this dysfunctional shit on me and his enemies at times. I think that stupid muscular fucker needed to get a good long look at himself in the mirror."
Armin raised an eyebrow, shaking his head in disbelief at first. He then inquired, "Wow. I guess I never did see that... Well, what bout Bertholdt? What is he is to you...?"
She shrugged. How could she feel towards a man so taciturn that even she couldn't hope to peg him correctly? "He's... too distant, lacks will-power and a personality. I swear if I tore out that spine of his and beat him to death with it he wouldn't try to fight me. He gets along well with the others strangely, but he stares at me too much. It was a little creepy."
That's when Armin had to know, "You noticed that, but didn't you notice anything else? Maybe like Bertholdt's feelings towards you-?"
She shook her head. What feelings was there to know? She felt like a stranger to the lanky tower of a young man.
Armin let out something that bordered a girlish squeak. Annie looked up at him at this and asked, "What? Something funny, Arlert?"
"Ah, no, as far as I know. Bertholdt's always been a little hard to peg as you say but he means well when it comes to you. You should've seen him when I told him you being tortured."
"You told him... that I was being tortured?" She blinked. "That's a bull-faced lie."
Armin shrugged somewhat non-chalantly, "True, but I hear from Eren that he might've been eye-balling you for quite some time. Think back Annie; you said yourself he stares too much. Surely you caught him doing it?"
Annie puzzled over this for only a few seconds before comprehension bloomed forth. She finally lifted her head from staring so intentedly at her shins and mumbled, "Bertholdt... Does he actually give a damn I wonder?"
Armin's eye went from Annie and then to his crumpled coat on his lap, "You'd be surprised. If only you knew of our last encounter..."
She gazed at the suddenly sullen faced boy fully, but he kept his eyes glued to a very fascinating crinkle in his stained coat.
"What happened-?" She pressed.
A sigh escaped him before he answered, his shoulders slumping. "I don't think we have the time to cover all that. It takes a lot of explaining even though it happened within days of your capture. Anyway, you were saying-?"
Annie found her vision once again at her hands, feeling the weight of it all sitting heavily on her suddenly trembling frame. She mutely felt silly for having spilled her guts to Armin regarding her view on matters, but she soon noted that she didn't want to care anymore. It was all very cold again, both the world and her physical being; the fire having all but died in its hearth.
Upon remembrance, Annie went to tend to it but decided against it once she realized there was more light in this dark realm then she'd originally perceived. The moon was low on the horizon, and the stars were fading gently into oblivion; the milkiness of the heavens having vanished and replaced with the colors of light blue tinged with dawn pink. The sun was fast rising and it unnerved Annie. She withdrew her hand and went right back into the serious girl that she was, tossing everything into the pack and mouthing curses, their conversation lost.
She'll have to get her answers, and her mind for that matter, later.
Armin just noticed the slowly lighting line along the flat lands and walls as well, letting out a weak 'eep' and then scouring the terrain for all of his belongings and of some Titans. He found his gear again but it was smashed to uselessness and there was hardly any gas to use in the canisters at all as he recalled. He tried to stand up but he couldn't even get his legs to cooperate; they were asleep. Crawling was out of the question; his arm was fractured and he had a broken finger to work with. Sputtering foul words that would've made Levi proud he turned to Annie and watched her take everything usable and jumped when she threw his pouch at him.
"Its yours, Arlert," she had that annoying bored sound to her voice again, as if none of their earlier reconciliation had ever occurred. "We need to think of a plan and stick to it. Now."
"P-plan?"
"What do you think?"
"Think of wha-?"
"Where should we go?"
"Huh?"
"Arlert! Focus! What should we do?"
I feel ridiculous. I'm asking this idiot for help. He betrayed me and sold me out and he's a loyal lover of humanity. He's an annoying smart-ass that's hatefully and overly attached to that wretched Mikasa and Eren by the hip and he's such a pain in my ass.
-But he's all the ally I have left now.
...The Hell am I thinking...? I'm using him. He's no ally.
Armin stared at Annie like he's never seen her before, his expression dumbly blank and his hands frozen over the pouch. He might've been thinking too fast or not at all for all she knew. She made a threatening advance and loomed over him, her hands balled at her sides and putting out her lip in a way that he understood as an I mean business sort of way.
As if waking up from a daydream, he shook his dirty head and recentered his attention on their situation. His eye was clear but his mind was mired in fog. He felt his lower, broken lip shake in a way that was representative of his quick-emergency thinking; but Annie still had to wait for an entire minute before he chose to speak.
"We're enemies last time I checked. You're asking me for help why?"
She squared her shoulders.
"...Don't you want to go home and leave my 'smart-ass' here while you search for Reiner and Bertholdt? Or maybe maybe find that Beast thing-?"
Annie felt her heart quicken at the mention of the fellow shifter, "You really saw him then."
"...Hairy, smart and as large as life. Why?"
"What was he doing when you encountered him?"
Armin's expression became sour, his flushed button-shaped nose wrinkling. "He was trying to abduct you... or rescue you; couldn't really see the difference," he seemed to wave that off in a contempuous manner. "How do you think we got down here in the first place?"
Annie's bored look flip-flopped to shock once again, her eyes suddenly conflicted. This change startled Armin horrendously, reminding him of Annie's emotional turmoil. It was easy to forget that even she can be this capable of being so open about her feelings whenever she wasn't being a difficult individual. It was new to him considering her usual reticent behavior that normally exhibited her profound disinterest with the world.
"Where was he seen last?" She carefully ground out.
Armin flicked his bandaged head lightly behind her, indicating the last place he knew off. Annie followed his scowl towards Wall Sina and scanned its entirety, but saw nothing of the mentioned menace. She got the idea though. Armin had earlier exclaimed that the grizzled Titan had been attacking Humanity's inner sanctum, incidentally liberating her of her stony imprisonment. This still left Annie thinking however; she'd been so convinced that her job was done that hearing about this bid to 'rescue' her left her reeling. She thought she was free of her terrible and sinful obligations as a shifter; and yet this attempt to take her back was a symbol of his way of saying she wasn't done being used yet.
In truth, Annie was sick of all of this nonsense and was quite fed up with it. She never wanted to go back, whether it was to the fighting or her possibly ruined birthplace. Home seemed so far away and the thought of it suddenly seemed so foreign to her, the path back crawling with hazards that she can manage only in her Titan form. The warrior girl pondered on her home's existence and state of being, deciding whether she was comfortable with the idea of returning to it only to find out if it'd become a smoldering wreck. She'd tried to escape to it before while she was fighting Eren; what was stopping her now?
As if reading her mind, Armin had spoken up, "Well Annie, you're free, and I can't stop you."
She redirected her troubled stare onto the withered soldier, his voice anchoring her back to her impending plight.
At her gaze, he fidgeted but never wavored in both voice and attentiveness, his eye that annoying blank and calculating intensity that made her feel very exposed, innards and all, "I said you can leave, and you really should before the Titans rise and shine. What're you lingering here for?"
Is he... testing me?
Annie frowned at him but it was half-hearted; she didn't want to deal with his bull-shit right now. "Why do you care? Scared I'll leave you to be Titan fodder?"
"I could be, but that isn't what's important right now. Problem is, you're still here, and you seem to be having trouble deciding something. You wanted me to help you out, right?"
Annie faltered, but it wasn't that plain to see. Something about Armin's scathing implification bothered her greatly.
Did his personality... change? I couldn't tell before but now...
She sniffed, "So what?"
"You didn't leave me to die, you patched me up, you assured I'd survive the night by playing sentinel and you'd even entertained my questions and responded in kind. This is an odd reversal of your personality... Or maybe this kindness was always there?"
She ground her teeth together, "Kindness? Real funny Arlert. I just needed some idea of what happened in the past months; I don't need to be your babysitter any longer. I can and will head straight home without you holding me back."
His mouth lifted into a smile that beheld no warmth; it was cold and unfit to be on his normally shining face. His last eye was almost every bit as icy as hers, and it was livid with an emotion she couldn't discern. It was a harsh and rather staggering turn of events, like an insane stranger was wearing his face.
"Well go," he goaded. "I just wonder why you're not heading towards the Ape and his summons."
"Its not like I can do anything about the job anymore; I was disposable."
"Not to him you are."
What is he trying to do? Piss me off more?
The sun rose ever higher as they sized each-other up, their minds working in full force. Even Armin's injury-addled brain seemed to be functioning just fine and a little too fast much to Annie's discomfort; he was deliberately trying to prompt her to do something, she can feel it.
With a snarl she mouthed, "Are you trying to get me to kill you just because you're a major coward in truth? Don't wanna be breakfast for the walking meatbags out there?"
"Not at all, although I'll be honest here; I don't want to die needlessly and be an easy meal for a stinking Titan that so happens to pass by, just like with dear old Marco," he taunted. His weird expression waned a little, "I could be tempting you or maybe I'm not."
You freaky fucker. That was dirty.
"Cut the crap, Arlert," She spat. "What're you trying to do in your predicament anyhow?"
"What do you think?"
If she thought she wasn't already sick of him then she was damn sure she was sick of him now.
"You cocky little wastrel," Her eyes narrowed to the very nearest point of closing them. "The Hell are you getting so worked up at me for anyway? I saved your god-damned life and you have the nerve to-"
"You're the one that's getting worked up, not me."
She bared her teeth and breathed venom as she spoke, "What's your point with this interrogation then?!"
Armin leaned toward her and shouted, "I'm calling you out on our bet, Annie! You're about to turn and run away again like last time! Are you or are you not going to finish what you started?"
This rooted Annie to the spot, her words choked off between her throat and her mouth. Armin glared at her with a fury she never expected him to have, his small chest heaving from the extensive conversations they've had previously. He was supposed to be resting in truth, but he was throwing the pitiful remnants of his energy just to throw her off. Not to mention he was a hair's width from insane. What's gotten into him she wondered.
"We can't stay here all morning. Will you or will you not finish the job or would you rather leave me out here to be eaten? Either way I'm finished. I can't even hope to get to wall let alone climb it, but that doesn't matter to you anyway, right?" Armin's eyes were more level and determined than ever, despite the fact that he was indeed in a crisis situation. "...Or maybe you're letting me live because you need my help? Why don't you ante up?"
"If you die either way, then why say something about this?"
He pursed his lip before shifting his face into a calm if not resigned mask, "Because there's a fine difference between leaving your easy prey out to be eaten by something else or actually making the kill yourself. You didn't need me to tell you that; you knew that all along, miss warrior."
Once again, Armin makes a frustratingly valid point.
Annie's fists dug into her shaken palms, her face ablaze with an anger that clenched her jaw and sent acid spitting from her eyes. She only had so much self control but this was very trying for her already shallow-rooted temper. She spun on her feet and stared hotly at the wall and then darted a glance out into the open plains. The choices may have been obvious to her but not the decision. She was torn in-betwixt her role and her desires coupled with a proclamation she'd once made with this dour-faced youth sitting helpless in his own excreta. Going home or returning to the fight was one thing, but the remarkable notation of actually killing Armin Arlert was another thing entirely after her earlier actions. Seeing how that no matter which way she went, she would still have to be conflicted with the idea of deciding the boy's fate.
She should've let him die in his own bodily filth while she had the chance, and yet she just had to be so fucking nice.
'If you don't kill me this time, you won't be able to make excuses like, "I'll see if my bet pays off"!'
Throwing her head back and staring huntedly at the endless skies, she knew she had to do something. Nostrils flared, a small jet of vapor simmered out and somewhat startled Armin, not knowing she could do even that in her human form; but it served as a reminder of her capabilities as a Titan-shifting master.
Why is killing him now so damn hard? I'd saved his life for a reason, right?
Remembering the purpose of her earlier actions she lowered her surly glare back onto the strategist, whose eye was a fiery glow despite the chilled color of his azul gaze. Annie then forced out through her pearly whites, "I'm sticking to my end no matter what. I'll let you live so I could kill you later, Arlert. I made this clear to you earlier, didn't I?"
"You may have said it clearly, but the meaning didn't quite stick," He retorted.
Her jugular throbbed with a prominent display of an infuriated blood-flow, but her hands unclenched and she was suddenly helping the boy to his feet with a force that clearly indicated how she exactly felt about him and his bluffs. He stumbled as he rose, her hands a vice on his free arm. He hissed at the pain but it mutely gave the former warrior the satisfaction of knowing that he wasn't enjoying this anymore than she was.
By the time he was on his feet though, he managed to unload yet another question to add the fuel to her inner fire, "So what now? You're hulling me around with you no matter what?"
"What do you think?"
His words being tossed back at him didn't bother him as much as she'd hoped it would. He merely went on, "So that makes me your prisoner; a weakling who can't fight nor run. How droll."
"Can't a hunter play with its food a little?"
"You're more twisted than I'd pegged you to be."
"And you're more of a grievance than I'd originally thought you out to be."
"Touche`," Armin's face had that grotesque smirk again. "So now what? The Beast Titan or your lost home, Annie?"
She removed her eyes from him just to avoid seeing his derisive expression; the look he was giving her left her feeling like she was made out to be something of an indecisive coward. Staring at the earth, she weighed all of what she could do with extreme detail and careful thinking. She was no Erwin Smith in the brains department, but even with her knowledge she knew that one of the choices was a fool's errand at this point:
Humanity's finished the very instant the Beast Titan attacked, not to mention the corrupted natures of the now huddled people hiding behind Sina's barriers being weighed into the equation. Remembering Armin's earlier mention of Eren being in possible enemy hands, she couldn't help but shiver at the thought of him being devoured by actual people instead of Titans. She'd had no love for Eren after her last fight, and her 'love' for him had only been mutual respect as a fighter and ally anyhow. Going back into the wall meant for her and Armin to do some fighting that seemed to be very overly taxing and pointless. The Titans had virtually won at this critical juncture and there was the added danger of dying needlessly. Eren was still too valuable to lose in the onsuing events, but the Beast Titan was already in the Wall most likely trying to find him; so retrieving him was certainly pointless in a way. There's also the easy and obvious choice of going home too, but it seemed far too easy. She also lacked the 'item' to get her safely into it as well.
Annie's face contorted into a more reflective visage, her mind working at a pace that nearly had her pulling her hair out. Going home seemed to be the only choice, but what if the Ape knew she'd turned tail and fled to the place of her birth? He could be there to receive her, ready to 'reward' her for her cowrdice. That said, was her home even standing and was it worth the exhausting trip there? What could she do with Armin now? What if she went to find Reiner and Bertholdt instead? Could the three of them together get out of this mess? She'd knew that Bertholdt wouldn't leave her hanging and she was sure Reiner would do the same (kind of), but they'd certainly be angry with her decision to come without Eren.
I'm burning up too much time thinking about it. The choices are just so damn hard to pick from. Why is leading such an easy life so fucking difficult? You might as well do things the hard way if that's true...
Annie finally landed her eyes on Armin, the only person in the world right now who could help but he was the one expecting an answer. He's the captive and he's supposed to be following her lead after all. Armin could for all she knew have the solution already cooked up within those ingenious recesses of his brilliant mind.
He does better under pressure than me. The hell am I to do?
Armin's stare fell from the cold all-knowing look and into a more impassive expression; his bruised lips a thin line and his uncovered eye a startling brightness that made Annie's gut knot up. He already knew what to do.
But should I ask?
Annie suddenly realized the amount of depth of scrutiny that he was peering at her with, as if he was trying to urge her to find the answer for herself. She unsteadily met his glimmering eye with her own doubtful pair while her mind clicked at a slower pace, her thought processing a less disorderly mess. She fought the urge to shake out her uneasiness and kept her hands to her sides at all times. Two minutes crept by without her knowing it next. It was then, dawning on her in a way that made her feel stupid for not knowing it sooner, an advent revelation decided to emerge in way that rose like the wayward sun into the horizon. It was what she wanted to know all night ever since her liberation.
With the odd but not so unfamiliar look of intent stretching across her face, she'd adamantly announced to her companion, "I know where we need to go, but you're not at liberty to bitch about it as we head out; you're at my mercy now. Is that not clear, Arlert?"
"Crystal," He replied with conviction.
