I Was There …

Watching Over You

I sat in the bathroom, squeezing the small white stick in my hand. The test had turned pink … I was pregnant. I felt as though every inch of me was shaking. What was I supposed to do now? It's not that I didn't want a baby. I did, and the fact that it was Itachi's baby only made it that much better, even if we weren't married yet. But … he'd just gotten a new mission from the Leaf Village leader, one that would save Konoha but destroy his life forever. The mission was so important to him, but it was supposed to be a secret. The only reason I even knew about it was because Madara had told me about it. He'd said that Itachi only told him because he knew that he couldn't do it himself.

I threw the pregnancy test away and walked into the kitchen, trying to find something to distract me. I started rummaging through the food pantry and withdrew some instant ramen. I followed the directions for preparations, then put it in the microwave. Now, I was left pacing the kitchen, waiting for the ramen to finish, Alright Chiyuki, you can't avoid it forever.

Itachi had been ordered by the Hokage to kill the entire Uchiha clan, which would make him a permanent exile to the Konoha village. My anger built at the thought, and I turned to a nearby counter, slamming my fist on it, "Damn it! How can they do that? They know that he won't be able to refuse them." This was the only way to avoid an all out war between Konoha and the Uchiha, and Itachi was such a gentle, conflict-hating man that there was no question about the choice he would make. My brow furrowed and my eyes stung as a lump congealed in my throat.

Not only was he charged with this mission, but he was also ill. He'd come down with this disease sometime near the beginning of the year, but of course, being the kind person he is, he avoided telling me. To this day he doesn't know that I'm aware of it, although he probably has a suspicion. In fact, he'd been trying to hide it from everyone. He successfully hid it from the rest of the family, but when he spends the night with me and I wake up to his terrible coughing fits in the middle of the night and see him cleaning up the blood in the sink when I go to check on him, it's kind of hard to miss. This disease, whatever it is, obviously isn't hereditary or his father would know about it. Actually, his father would probably have it. But, whether or not it was hereditary didn't concern me.

I myself was a part of the Uchiha clan, a distant enough relative that I didn't even have a strong Sharingan. But I didn't fear for myself. I was only worried about Itachi and the new life that we had created. My microwave beeped loudly and I retrieved my ramen. But by now I had no desire to eat; there was just too much to think about and not enough time to think about it. He had been ordered to carry out his mission by midnight tonight.

I threw the ramen away and then sat in a chair, wishing that I hadn't. "Alright," I told myself, "think logically about this. One life doesn't matter … or, in this case, two lives. The village comes first, and this is the best way to keep it safe. If Itachi finds out, he'll only suffer. Either he won't do it and fail his mission, which I doubt would happen, or he will do it and he'll be haunted by it for the rest of his life. So," I stood up, "that's it; I just won't tell him."

"Tell me what?" Itachi's voice came from the door to the kitchen, which was only a short way from the table that I'd been sitting at. I turned to see his gentle smile. He crossed his arms, "Is it a surprise?" "Ye-" I bit my lip; I never was any good at hiding things like this from him, so I wimped out and told him the truth, "No. T-there's something I need to tell you." His smile fell into a concerned frown as he sat at the seat across from the one that I'd been sitting in. As I sat back down, he reached half way across the table, offering to hold my hands. I accepted, the smallest hint of a smile crossing my expression as I imagined what he would be like as a father. Still, despite my grin, a tear fell down my cheek as a heavy feeling settled in my heart. "Chiyuki," he stroked the back of my hands with his thumbs, "what is it? What's wrong?"

"I-" I hesitated, trying to swallow the lump in my throat, "I'm pregnant." His eyes widened and his jaw dropped for a moment, "You're sure?" I nodded, looking down at our hands as more tears escaped me. I barely heard him get up and walk to my side, still holding my hands as he knelt down next to me. I turned to him, withdrawing my hand only for a moment to wipe a tear away, but he stopped me by wiping them away himself. I was surprised by his confused expression, but couldn't manage to say anything about it through my small sobs. He gently pulled my face down to his to kiss my forehead, "Why are you crying about that? Aren't you happy? Don't want my children?"

"N-no!" I shook my head, "I mean, yes. I do but I … I just." He gave me that same gentle look that he had so many times before. The look that told me that he was ready to listen and would not be angry about anything I'd say. I took a steadying breath and decided that, in order to not let him know that I knew at least something about his mission, I would have to be tactful, "Just promise this won't get in the way of any of your missions." He smiled and sighed. He was excellent at hiding certain emotions, though I could still see the sadness and regret in his eyes as he made the promise that would seal our fate and our baby's fate, "Alright, I promise."

I closed my eyes and tried to look away as more tears slid down my cheeks. "Come with me?" Itachi asked sweetly. My heart jumped and my eyes shot to his, "What? Where?" He chuckled, "I want you to walk through the village with me. Will you?" I nodded and smiled, happy that he was able to distract me.

Moments later we were wandering around the market of Konoha. We were just passing a stand selling bread when a small blonde boy with whisker like marks on his cheeks ran by us, accidentally tripping over my foot. He moaned, barely lifting himself off the ground. I leaned down and offered him my hand to help him up. For a second he looked shocked, but he smiled widely and took my hand. As he ran off, he shouted over his shoulder and waved, "Thanks, lady!" I smiled and waved back.

Itachi chuckled, "I believe that was Uzumaki Naruto, the boy with the nine-tailed fox spirit sealed inside him." I quirked an eyebrow at him, "And?" "Nothing," he shook his head incredulously, "I don't have anything against him. It's just that you are the only person in the village that would have done that." I grinned, blushing a little, "Oh, I don't know. I think you would have done it. No, I know you would have. That's just who you are." He gave me the tender smile he always did when I'd say something like that and entwined his fingers with mine, "Maybe you're right about that." I giggled and we continued through the market.

"Sasuke's been training quite bit lately." He said when we stopped at a small stand with many common ninja weapons and scrolls. I laughed, "That's because he wants be as strong as you are." Itachi sighed as he inspected a shuriken, "He shouldn't push himself so hard … at least, not yet."

I frowned slightly. Madara had also explained to me what Itachi planned to do to save his brother; the only person that he could not to kill on his mission … his heart just wouldn't allow it. Itachi was going to make his own brother hate him, despise him so that he would get stronger and take revenge on him. Then, just as he died, Itachi was going to transfer his amazing ability to control his sharingan to his little brother. This would be Itachi's final way of protecting his dear Sasuke.

"Chiyuki?" Itachi's voice broke me out of my reverie, "Are you alright?" I nodded and smiled. There's nothing I can do about this, so I need to relax. Still, that is so much easier said than done.

Madara suddenly ran from behind a nearby building, "Itachi, come quickly! The Hokage needs to talk with you!" Itachi scowled, but nodded anyways. He turned to me, "I need to go." My smile fell into a slight pout, "Okay." He sighed heavily and brushed my raven-black bangs out of my face, "I'll see you later tonight." The smile that followed might have been a normal smile to anyone else, but to me it was heartbreaking. Even if he was trying to hide it, I could see what he really wanted to say, please run. Get out of Konoha and don't come back. Do anything; just don't be at home tonight.

I smiled as reassuringly as possible and kissed his lips gently before whispering in his ear, "I'll be waiting." His brow furrowed and he looked as if he was in pain, but only for a moment. He quickly covered up the pain with a bitter sweet smile, "I love you, Chiyuki." Kneeling down, he pressed his lips to the center of my stomach and whispered to the small life inside me, "I love you, too."

Then he stood and walked to Madara, who led him around the corner of the building and out of sight. I suddenly felt everyone's eyes on me and blushed madly, looking at all of the shocked and entranced faces around me. The rest of the way back home I could hear the people around me whispering things like, "Do you think she's really pregnant?" or, "That was so cute! I hope it's like that when I get pregnant." I was so happy when I finally got home.

I slammed the door behind me, leaned against it, completely exhausted, and smiled, laughing weakly, "Well, that's over." I rubbed my belly, barely even able to feel the bump between my hips, then I spoke to the child, "Looks like all we can do is wait for Daddy now, huh?"

It was late that night that Itachi came to me. I was sitting at the table in the kitchen, facing away from the door and feeling strangely calm about what I knew would happen. When the door slid open and he stepped through I took a deep breath and smiled over my shoulder at him, "You made it." He hesitated at the door, but stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders as he did. A glint of silver in his right hand caught my eye. It was a kunai.

I placed my hand on his and pulled the kunai to the left side of my chest, "Don't waste too much time; you need to be out of the village by sun up and you still have to go to your house and take care of your parents, don't you?" He flinched slightly, "You do know … then why didn't you leave?"

I stood and faced him, forcing him to take a step back as I walked around the chair I'd been sitting in. Tears started to cascade down my cheeks, though I wasn't even sure why. I'd already accepted the fact that I would die tonight, and promised myself that, even after I died, I would protect Itachi and make sure his mission succeeded.

He was staring at me in a way that some might consider cold hearted. I put on my happiest face and held my arms out to him, "Because I want to help you … you and the village. I love you, and I will not run from you, whether you've come simply to talk with me, make love with me, or to kill me." His eyes widened and he looked down, hiding his red sharingan eyes behind his black bangs. I smiled and let my arms drop to my sides, deciding to make this as easy on him as possible.

"What do you want to name him?" I tried to distract him from what he was about to do. He looked up and gave me a skeptical look, "How do you know the baby's a boy?" I laughed a little, "I don't. I'd just rather call the baby he than it." He shook his head and chuckled, "You always do things like that."

For a second it was quiet. We just stood there and looked at each other. I considered trying to at least do something to save the baby. It was easy to tell from his expression that the same thing crossed his mind. I just shook my head, "No. Even if we do save this baby, the only family he would have would be Sasuke and with what he'll be busy doing I don't think that would be a healthy relationship." He thought for a moment, then nodded with a sad expression on his face.

We both knew we couldn't delay it any longer, so I took a step forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face in the bend between his neck and shoulder. His breath went ragged and he held me tightly, "I love you, Chiyuki."

"I love you, too." I whispered, trying, to convey all of my tenderness for Itachi in that one simple sentence. He still held the kunai knife, so I grabbed his hand and, taking a small step back, pulled the knife the center of my chest. His jaw clenched and his brow furrowed as tears collected in his eyes. Pressing his forehead against mine and closing his eyelids, he took a deep, shaky breath, as though he were bracing himself for what he was going to do. Then he thrust the kunai forward.

I heard the sickening snap of my ribs and the tearing of my flesh before I actually felt the pain. But, when the pain did hit me, it was horrific. I bit my bottom lip, struggling to keep from screaming, but I still couldn't stop myself from moaning. It felt like a fire had erupted in my chest. He clutched me as close to him as he could and knelt on the ground.

As silent, heart wrenching tears slowly trickled down his face, something inside him was changing. Without him even saying anything, I could tell. Slowly, as my heartbeats grew slower, his formed a thick wall of ice. There was no way to stop it, and with what he was planning, he would need that wall of ice in order to protect himself. As he held me, my body started turning cold as if his ice was penetrating deep into me as well. I smiled bitter sweetly when a thought crossed my mind. The least I could do was make our last moments together happy. I tried to speak, but my voice came out as nothing but a small whisper, "You never answered my question."

He leaned back and looked me in the eyes, wiping away tears from my cheeks … tears that I hadn't even noticed, "What do you mean?" I could feel myself fading, but I still held on, "What do you want to name the baby?" He went silent for a moment, then he smiled gently at me, "For a girl, I'd like to name her Kaori, and for a boy, Sasuke." My breathing kept getting more and more shallow. Kaori … my mother's name … I grinned, whispering with my last breath, "That's … perfect." Then I stopped breathing completely, and my vision faded. The last thing I saw was the pained look on Itachi's face.

From then on, I watched over him from somewhere high above. Whether it was heaven or just some sort of spiritual world that I watched from, I have no idea … or maybe watching as he silently broke himself down on the inside was the hell I'd been allotted for telling the man I love that, when he took my life, he'd be taking his unborn child's life as well. Regardless, I watched him as he carried out his plan with flawless precision. His disease still gradually wore away at him, but he didn't let that affect his mission at all. In fact, to prolong his … his death, he took countless medications.

For a long time at the beginning, whenever he was alone, he would get that same agonized expression on his face that he wore when I died. I kept looking at his pain, wishing with all my heart that I could help him somehow … but, of course, wishing had absolutely no effect. Eventually, the thick wall of ice that he'd put around his heart took root and he shut down his emotions completely. In the end, he joined a group called the Akatsuki, a collection of outcast ninjas that had been formed by Madara, who was now known as Tobi. He'd also pretended that he was after Sasuke's eyes so that no one would guess what he really wanted. Itachi used this group and his façade to prepare for his fight with his little brother.

The day that Itachi had planned finally came. I watched as his fight with his brother unfolded. I cringed when Itachi's illness flared up, making him cough blood into his hand. When Sasuke pierced Itachi with his blades and jutsu I wanted to scream. But when Sasuke shouted how much he hated his brother … that was the worst. Sasuke's loathing for Itachi may have been part of Itachi's plan, but hearing Sasuke say it the way he did still made my heart twist painfully in my chest … I could only imagine how Itachi felt.

When the battle ended, Itachi and his brother were barely standing. My stomach twisted, but I forced myself to watch. Still keeping up his façade of trying to take Sasuke's eyes, he reached forward with his index and middle finger pointing straight at Sasuke. Then, just before his fingers reached Sasuke's eyes, he stopped. Smiling the most heartbreaking smile, Itachi whispered to his brother lovingly, "Sorry, Sasuke, this is it." Then, he poked Sasuke's forehead gently, and collapsed to the ground.

If there was one thing I wanted more than anything else, I wanted to be by Itachi's side when he died. So, I struggled to get down to him. I fought as hard as I could. Eventually, I was close enough to touch him. I'd made it just before a couple other members of the Akatsuki did. Even though he'd given all of the power residing in his eyes to his brother, and had gone blind because of it, I could have sworn that he saw me. That kind, happy smile played on the edge of his lips as he drew his last breath. I touched his hand, desperate to make some sort of connection with him. As though he actually felt it, his hand twitched. The last word on his lips was a single name … my name. Then the other two members of the Akatsuki that had also been watching these siblings fight came and took away Itachi's body.

Within moments, I ran out of strength and couldn't struggle anymore, so I snapped back to where ever I'd been while I was watching over Itachi. But, when I returned, I wasn't alone … Itachi was standing in front of me. He smiled warmly, like the ice inside of him had simply melted away. Then, he reached out his hand. My heart was about ready to burst and a grin, bigger than any that I'd ever worn before, broke out across my face. Even as I took his hand, we didn't say anything … no words were needed for this reunion.

We were together again at last. He, I, and our unborn child could finally stay together. All we had to do now was wait for Sasuke to come and join us, and trust me, we were perfectly content to wait for him as long as we needed to. In fact, the longer the better …

… After all, we were watching over him.