Cuts of the Heart.

Summery- Vince tries to tell Howard he loves him, with disasterous results. Rated 'T' for suicide attempt.

Disclaimer- I do not own the boosh, Noel Fielding and Julian Barrett do.

Author's Notes- Deadicated for Jamie and stars of andromeda for their excellent angst stories :) This chapter will be told in Howard's P.O.V, sorry if this offends anyone. Also, I forgot to mention this but this is set during series 2 :)

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God, Vince has been up there for ages, what's he doing? If only he could be more like me when it comes to picking clothes, simple yet effective. Mind you, I wouldn't change him for anything, so he's vain and annoying sometimes, but that's Vince and I wouldn't change him for the world. I remember when I first met him, he was so cute when he was confused where to go, so I told him. I then offered him some of the sweets mom packed me, I hated them and he gave me that dizzy smile that made my knees weak.

Yes, I've faniced him for ages, but that guy wouldn't want me. What's there to want? He's been with loads of people, men and women yet never seems to stick with them, I've always wondered why. We're opposites really, I like my jazz and simple brown and grey clothing, while he loves his electro music and colourful clothing. That's probably why we're such great friends, we complete each other.

His smile that brightens even the most darkest room, his huge blue eyes, his great personality, these are the things that made me fell in love with him. The way his waif body grids and moves while he dances at all the clubs on the dancefloor, his raven hair clung to his handsome features with sweat, his cheeks tinged pink.

I put on some jazz music, slow and gentle while waiting for him to come down and sit down on the sofa, the tune and notes washing over me and relaxing me while thoughts of Vince ran through my mind. Then I hear a voice next to me and I jump high, my heart slowing down when I saw Vince sitting next to me, dressed up to the nines in his tight clothing with his best make-up on. It makes my heart stop and my breath hold just seeing him like that "Vince, don't scare me out of my jazz trance, I keep telling you"

"Sorry, mate. Wanna cup of tea?" He asked, a strange look in his eyes. I nod yes and watch him get up to the kitchen area, placing two tea bags into our mugs, seeing his hands shaking slightly as he does so. What's he nervous about? I get up and follow him, placing my hand on his shoulder and notised his back straightened quickly "You alright, Vince?"

"Yeah, course I am. I'm just nervous about tonight, that's all" So he is nervous about something, I give him a small smile and remove my hand, watching as his body slouched again, a nice little blush covering his face. Is he meeting someone tonight? At that thought, a surge of jealousy ran through my body and mind "Why? You going out tonight?" I manage to ask without belaying my feelings.

"Nah, I thought that I'd..." He said, before launcing himself at me, his soft lips on my own. I jumped and utter a slight squeak at the surprise, before I tried touching his lips with my tounge. He opened his mouth without protest and I slipped my tounge in, enjoying this moment until my mind betrayed me, telling me this could all just be a joke, another one of Vince's one night stands, so I pushed him away.

"Vince...I..." I couldn't stand the dejected, devestated look on his face as I walked slowly away, so I turned tail and ran out the flat, slamming the door behind me. I ran towards the park behind the flat, lit up by the light of the full moon and the bright stars up in the dark navy sky. I soon grew out of breath and settled on a bench, trying to get the stitch out my side as I collected my thoughts.

Vince kissed me, he kissed me? Why? Does he love me too? God, I'm confused. He can't love me, can he? I mean, what's there to love? Awhile later as these questions spun in my mind, I hear talking and look up from my eyeline of the floor, watching a couple walk past, arm in arm enjoying each others company as they exchanged kisses.

Could me and Vince have that? Or will I just be a one night stand? But the look in Vince's face as he pushed him away, his blue eyes threatening to flow over with tears of dejection will always haunt me, and the kiss was more full of love then lust. Maybe I've got it wrong, maybe he does love me after all, I should get back and talk to him about it, see what will really happen between us.

I get up and walk back to the flat, until a slight niggling in the back of my mind was telling me something was wrong, something to do with Vince. I hurried more quickly along, getting home an ambulance rush around the corner. Must have just drove past, I kept telling myself, nothing's happened to him really.

I enter the flat and rush upstairs, frozen at the sight of Naboo comforting Bollo on the sofa. The gorilla look so upset, my heart froze, something as happened to Vince "W-What happened?" I stuttered, nervous.

Naboo and Bollo looked up, anger placing their sadness "What did you say to him?" The shaman yelled, making me feel more small.

"Where is he? What's happened to Vince?" I asked again, my gut tightening with worry and panic.

"We coem home, tried callin for you guys. You was gone, so Bollo went upstairs to find Vince. Instead found Vince in pool of blood, his wrist slashed. Naboo phone ambulance while Bollo try and stop rest of blood flow" The familiar told, his voice wavering with fresh tears "Precious Vince might be dying, and it your fault!"

At those words, I faultered in my steps. Vince cut himself, and it's my fault for pushing him away, before giving him a chance to explain his feelings. I felt sick, bile rising to the back of my throat as tears came fresh in my eyes. He could be dying and I'm not there for him. I went to rsuh back down the stairs, until I heard a annoyed sigh behind me.

Naboo got up from the sofa and tole Bollo to get the carpet "We'd better get going then, if you want to see Vince and make up to him" I couldn't agree more as Bollo bought down the carpet from Naboo's room and we all got on, flying through the window towards the hospital.

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There we go, one more chapter left. Hope I got Howard right hehe from chugirl2526.