Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, obviously.

A/N: I would like to thank everyone who read the prologue, especially the ones that added my story to story alerts or favorites, and Creasia for her comment – and my friends who told me what they thought of the story via other means. Special thanks again go to amortencja – she is also responsible for pointing out a few of my typos. If anyone see any other mistakes in this chapter (or in the prologue, of course), I would be really grateful if you point them out – I try to make my story as free of mistakes as possible, but I know I don't notice everything, especially seeing as English is not my mother tongue.

The next chapter should be up within two weeks (probably earlier, but it's not certain, as I now have less time to write).

oxo

Chapter One: Born Again

Saturday, 6th August 1983, Mandrake's Scream, London

Around 9PM

Regulus Black looked over the table at his friend. He could tell that something was bothering him, but did not have the slightest idea what it could have been. Thousands of possibilities were running through his head, but none of them sounded plausible. Problems at work? He was self employed and wouldn't really ask him for advice. Money, then? Too proud. Family affairs? Impossible, especially seeing as a week ago everything seemed to be all right. A fight with Sirius? Some kind of business? A plead for help? No, no, no...

"What is it, Severus?" he asked. Severus looked up from the half-full glass of wine he was fumbling with, a slight frown on his face.

"What is what?" he asked blankly in return. Regulus just shook his head.

"Severus, I'm not blind," he said. "And I know you didn't ask me to meet you only to chat – you never do that. I can see that you're really worried about something. What is it?"

Severus smiled wanly. "You know me too well," he said. His smile faded. "I actually need to apologise to you," he added seriously.

"What for?" Regulus was surprised – he couldn't think of anything that Severus would need to apologise to him for – and didn't think it would make him this worried.

"We – that is, Lily and I – made you a promise that we most probably won't keep, despite our previous intentions..." he trailed off.

Well, that was confusing. Severus truly was worried about something. Something big. "What do you mean?" asked Regulus. "I don't even remember any promises."

Severus looked him straight in the eye, serious expression on his face. "We promised you that you're going to be a godfather to our third child. However, we decided we don't want any more children after all." There was something odd in Severus' voice, something he couldn't quite put a finger on.

"Never mind being a godfather, what happened? You seemed pretty set on on having three or four children, what made you change your minds?" Regulus was getting worried. It didn't seem like a kind of thing that would trouble Severus so much – unless it was his wife's decision and he disagreed with it, but no, it couldn't have been that. He would have been behaving differently then. And surely they would have settled their argument, not bring it out like that, without it being truly decided on. "Are the boys all right?" he added on impulse.

Severus dropped his gaze and sipped at his wine. "Jimmy is perfectly fine," he said slowly after a moment.

"But Tommy isn't?..." asked Regulus, dreading the answer. "What on earth happened?" But why would Severus avoid the subject for so long, instead of telling him right away? It wasn't his style. Something didn't quite add up here.

"Nothing happened," said Severus simply, an odd edge to his voice still there, now even more evident. He took another sip of wine. Regulus hoped he would elaborate, but no such luck.

"Then why would you scare me so?" he asked, feeling frustrated. "Severus, what is wrong?"

Severus put his glass, now empty, on a table and stared at it for a moment in silence. Then, he sighed.

"I don't know," he said finally. He then shook his head slightly, as if to clear his thoughts and looked at Regulus a bit sadly. "What would you say about Tommy?" he asked.

"That he's a sweet, intelligent little boy", replied Regulus, confused. "Why?"

"A normal three year old?"

"Yes, of course. Why wouldn't he be? Do you have any problems with him? Is there something you're worried about?"

Severus sighed. "He's... different, you know?"

"What do you mean? I've never seen anything... odd about him."

Severus shook his head. "You're a busy man, you visit us too rarely to notice. But you're also a Healer-"

"Not a very good one," interrupted Regulus. "I've started working at Mungo's only a few months ago, I'm not exactly experienced. And I'm not specialised in treating children. If you need-"

"I'm not seeking any medical treatment for him, I only need your advice."

"If only I'm able to give any..."

"Thank you," said Severus gratefully.

"Don't thank me yet. So, what is it?"

"I... where should I start?" Severus looked at his glass briefly, before remembering that it was already empty. He took a deep breath. "Tommy has always been a quiet boy, much quieter than Jimmy. You must have seen it, and it seems like there is nothing wrong with it – there are lots of shy, quiet children – I used to be one as well. But Tommy... when he was an infant, he hardly ever cried, much more rarely that children normally do. We were concerned, but he was healthy. He didn't babble long, he learned how to speak very early. Now, he doesn't talk much – again, you must have noticed – and when he does, he seems more mature than Jimmy – have you noticed it?"

"Now that you mention it, he does sometimes seem to be a bit older than he is – but that's probably because he's always rather calm for a three year old," replied Regulus.

"Precisely! He usually is so calm, isn't he? He never throws tantrums, never cry for toys, never pouts... And whenever he plays with Jimmy, the way he acts – you would say that he is the older brother there."

"It is rather odd, indeed – but I don't think this is all that worries you, is it?"

"No, no, there is more." Severus sighed. "He also doesn't seem to sleep very well – we've been to Healers, but again, apparently there is nothing wrong. And before you ask – we put both boys to sleep at about eight. If he's having bad dreams – he won't talk to us about it. Whenever Jimmy wakes up at night and can't go back to sleep, he comes to us – Tommy never does that, even though we encouraged him to do so at any time he feels the need to. We don't know how else we could help him – and he's too young for any kind of a sleeping potion."

Regulus was thoughtful. "I don't know how to help you with this," he said. "But I will look into it and ask some of my colleagues for advice."

"Thank you," Severus gave a slight nod. He opened his mouth as if to speak again, but closed it without a word. Regulus looked at him closely.

"I'm listening," he said.

"I'm not sure how to say it, so it wouldn't seem..." Severus shook his head slightly. "It's just... You know, some children have over-active imagination, but in Tommy's case... At times I wonder if it's all there is. Sometimes it seems like- like he really sees things that aren't there, or, I don't know, but it can't be that, can it? Sometimes he just acts so odd, I just don't know, and he says things. And..." He took a deep breath. "Yesterday... Yesterday, when I was outside with the boys, I caught him talking to a snake." At the lack of understanding at Regulus' face, he added, "I mean, in parseltongue."

Regulus gaped. "Are you sure? Maybe he was just hissing at it, you know how children are..."

Severus shook his head. "No, I don't think so, it didn't look like it."

"All right, if you're sure. Did you tell Lily?"

"No, and I don't know if I will – not yet, anyway. Maybe when he's a bit older. I don't think she would be comfortable with that... I mean, you know that she doesn't have a problem with Slytherin-"

"Seeing as she married one, I would say so," smiled Regulus.

"Exactly. But still, for our son to have a gift that is considered to be dark – although I don't understand why would it be so – one that connects him to Salazar Slytherin and almost surely secures him a place in his house... I think she'd prefer not to know it yet, besides she would probably try to deny it, say that he was just playing, just like you said-"

"You're scared of her reaction?" guessed Regulus.

"A bit," admitted Severus. "She worries about him enough already. But, truth be told, I'm glad he's a parselmouth, I was getting worried he might be a squib – he still haven't shown any indication of accidental magic. I know, he's only three, so it's a bit early to think that, but Jimmy did plenty at his age. I know, I know, every child is different, but still, I'm glad to have it settled."

Regulus frowned. "Wouldn't it be better to tell Lily then, so she would stop worrying about it as well?"

"Oh, Lily's not worrying about it yet, and him being a parselmouth would only bring her more worry – besides, I'm sure he will do something magical soon enough."

"As you wish." Regulus was a bit sceptical, but he didn't press the matter – it was Severus's business after all. "But about that other thing-"

"I'm sure I'm just overreacting. But still, is there any way to check if he-"

"Only by observation and conversation, but I don't think it is effective with such a young boy. I'll ask, though."

"And thank you again," said Severus seriously. "I'm glad I talked to you."

"You're welcome. Is there anything else that troubles you, or that you'd just want to talk about?"

"No, no," said Severus. "Or... No, it's nothing"

"Severus?"

"It's just..." Severus sighed. "There is one more thing."

"Well?" asked Regulus, when Severus showed no inclination to continue.

"Tommy's very affectionate, isn't he? said Severus finally, something odd in his voice audible once again. "He cuddles all the time, always very happy to see anyone, always wants to spend time with guests – especially Sirius, Remus and you..."

"And just what is weird or worrisome about that?" Regulus was a bit confused.

"About that? Nothing. But..." Severus trailed off.

"Yes?"

"He never wants to hug me, never wants to voluntarily spend time with me – or any-" his voice broke. "Or anything. And I don't know what I did wrong!" It looked like even talking about it brought Severus pain. "What did I doto make my three year old son dislike me so? I love both my boys equally, and I try to treat them equally as well. I just don't understand – what did I do?" He buried his face in his hands.

xxx

Harry never intended to live after killing little Tom Marvolo Riddle – but when ever have everything gone exactly as he had planned? He didn't complain this time, though – he loved his new life. Finally, for the first time since he was fifteen month old for the first time, he truly had a family to which he belonged. And, he surely would be the happiest boy in the world, he really would be, if not for the few things.

Firstly, he felt as if he had cheated his way into the family. Because he wasn't the boy they thought he was. He was not their little Tommy (Oh, how he hated this name – the irony of fate, honestly! And couldn't his parents have picked any other name? Even Severus or Lucius or Draco would be preferable, really. Maybe not Peter, but... On the second thought, yes, he still would rather be called Peter than Tom. Everything has got to be better than that.), oh no – how could he be an innocent three year old boy, when he had a memory of almost eighteen year old man who went through so much? But he just could not bear the thought of being alone, especially not when such an opportunity had presented itself to him. Besides, what else could he do? Try to explain everything the moment he learned to talk (He so could see their faces, it would be comical, really – but they wouldn't want him then, they would just left him like the freak he truly was.)? Or later – and just when would be the best time for it? Like they would believe him anyway. All right, so he could tell them things that would make them believe, but still. He wanted the chance to be a child, hell, he was a child – the only difference was his adult memory. It did not make him want the things other children wanted any less. So, he deceived them – so he was deceiving them every second of the day, each day. His whole existence was a lie – if only they knew, he would not be able to have any of it. He would never be able to 'be' a normal child.

Secondly, this world was, for lack of a better world, weird. The only thing normal, the only thing he would expect of it – was the presence of his Mum. And he loved her to pieces. He tried to spend as much time with her as he could, but, unfortunately, she worked a lot, so he didn't see her as often as he would like. The only other thing that didn't seem to change too much was the person of his godfather – that is, it was still Sirius Black. Of course, he was a completely different person than in his old world – here, everyone seemed so innocent and carefree in comparison. Well, no wonder, after all this world have never seen the threat of Voldemort, but it was a bit weird to see nevertheless. But, Sirius here not only seemed more innocent – he also seemed more grown up. And, well, serious. And he was friends with Snape, of all people. Which brought him to things that varied more from his old world. Like, Snape. Of course he had known that the man was his father – well, he had known since the day of the Final Battle, at least – his insides clenched painfully at the mere thought of it – but still, for some reason, he would rather expect to be raised up by James Potter, like it would happen in his old world if not for the Trelawney's prophecy. But no, of course not – James Potter didn't even exist in this world. Instead, there was Emma Potter – or rather now, Emma Black, Sirius Black's wife, Harry's – excuse me, Tommy's – godmother. What the hell.

Anyway, Snape. That was en enigma. The man differed so much from the one he had once known that it was scary. And it made him think about the night he died – then, Snape was also far from normal. Well, far far far further from normal, but still. And his death – he didn't claim the responsibility for his death, he was sure that Voldemort would kill him anyway, but if not for Harry, he would have done it differently... Less cruelly. Because of that, Harry couldn't help but feel tremendously guilty whenever he saw his father. And he felt that the man just should hate him – it would be only normal if he did, after all, didn't he hate him all their previous lives? Even after learning that he was Harry's father (How Harry resented him for that! But he didn't truly hate him, after all the man was on their side despite despising Harry, and Harry didn't want him dead – especially not like this) – so it was not only because of James Potter. Now, Harry half expected Snape to finally stop acting so fatherly and just decide he did not want to do anything with Harry. And Harry felt even more guilty for allowing him to think he was just Tommy – if Snape knew (What if he would use legilimency on Tommy? But Harry tried not to think about it too much, Snape wouldn't try to read a mind of a child, would he?), of all people he was the one that, as Harry thought, would be the most likely to hate him forever. And fairly so.

Of course, Harry knew, that this Snape had a better life than the one he had known in his old life. The mere atmosphere at school (and in the whole wizarding world!) during Tommy's parents' Hogwarts years must have been very much different without the threat of Voldemort. There were also no Death Eaters – or 'Death Eaters in training'. Even though the prejudice against Muggleborns still existed, as far as Harry knew it was not as prominent, and Slytherin, even though still disliked, did not seem to be as hated. And there were no Marauders. From what Harry had gathered, his Mum and father stayed friends thorough all seven years of school and Lily introduced Severus to Remus and Sirius. Without James Potter, Sirius still became friends with Remus (Harry did not know anything about Peter Pettigrew, but, truthfully, he didn't care.) – who, who would have guessed, was not even a werewolf, as Tommy learned when he once asked him about full moons – and they made friends with Lily, and, consequently, also with Snape, as this time around these two never tried to hide their friendship and were inseparable.

So, it really was no wonder that this Snape, who at Hogwarts had a few very good friends (and never has been bullied there, as far as Harry knew), married the love of his life soon after school instead of grieving her till his death and never had to serve any evil dark lords and do evil deeds or fear for his life (Neither did he have to work as a teacher, it must have counted for something! Besides, he was eight years younger than when Harry first met him in the other world) was a different man. A happier one. But still, Harry couldn't come to terms with this smiling, nice, fatherly Snape. The one who seemed to genuinely care for his children – even Tommy. The one who really acted like a Dad should. It all seemed wrong, somehow – especially since Harry had cheated. And too good to be true. And Harry didn't want to be disappointed.

Another new thing in this life was the fact that he now had a brother. An older one, at that (And his name was James – irony of fate strikes again! If the other Snape would somehow see how his equivalent in this world named his offspring – or both of them, really, Harry somehow doubted that his old Potion's teacher would like to name a child after Voldemort – he would be rolling in his grave.). In the other world, Harry had always wished he would have a sibling – so he was really happy when he found out that in this life he had. But it didn't change the fact that it was awfully weird to have an older brother who mentally was much younger than him. Even weirder was the fact that his parents were now twenty-three – so only about five years older than him when he, for lack of a better word, left the other world. And when he was born, the difference was only two years (They were then as old as the Weasley twins!) – how odd was that? So he tried not to think about it too much.

The weirdest thing of all was, however, something that did not have anything to do with other people. This whole world seemed to act differently, operate on a different set of rules – or maybe it was Harry who had changed? He was not sure. But the facts remained – he now was seeing things that should not exist – and no-one else seemed to see them, which was even more worrying. After three years Harry almost got used to this, but it was still a bit unsettling. Mostly, he would see strange creatures that he never had suspected of existing. And the ones he saw the most often seemed to be, from what he remembered Luna Lovegood saying, Wrackspurts. He wasn't sure if he even wanted to know whether they were real or just a figment of his imagination created from his memory of Luna – maybe he really was going crazy?

Another thing in this world that lessened his happiness somewhat was the fact that now, being a small child and all that, he could not even see his friends. And they were the ones he missed the most, the ones for whom he went back in time for – he had wanted Ginny, Ron, Hermione, Luna, Neville and many others to live and be happy again. Now, what with the lack of James Potter's existence, he wasn't even sure if they were alive. And if they were, he desperately wanted to meet them again. But, on the other hand, he realized that it would not be exactly the same, it couldn't be – they did not know him and probably were not even the same people he met there. And even if they would be the same as when he met them (Harry had the most hopes about Hermione – as she did not have any contact with the wizarding world before receiving her Hogwarts letter, how could lack of Voldemort affect her?), they would not have the experience that morphed them into the people they were when they died. And he was not, after all, the person they met for the first time. Not only did he have a very different home life, he also had memories of an eighteen year old! So mentally he would be much older than them – what if he would be too mature for them? Would they be able to become friends again? Harry hoped so.

With his eighteen year old memories came also another burden – nightmares. Nightmares of horrible things, things that no three years old should ever be forced to see. What's worse, they were not just dreams – it was always things that really happened in that other world, so far away from this one, and yet so close.

And the absolutely worst part was, he couldn't even talk to anyone about any of this.