Naruto the Black Blade

Disclaimer: I do not the Naruto series in any fashion, including stockholding. The following is a mish-mash of 'borrowed' concepts and mad creativity drawn from the ether of insanity. I do however acknowledge the rules as set down by MrWriterwriter for the purpose of this challenge.

"I swear guys, I'm not doing anything! It's the sword, it's doing this on its own!" -Nigel Blackblade, first known wielder of the Black Mirage.

"Regular Speech"

"YELLING OR SHOUTING"

"Heavily empowered speech. Yokai wielding Jinchuuriki or Celestial Gates user"

"Telepathy/mental speech"


Like a great many people in the world, Naruto had an awareness of his surroundings on par with a zombie when he first woke up. He shuffled through his morning routine from here to there, getting it all done without really thinking about anything at all. It wasn't till the blond started to get dressed that his brain kicked into gear, courtesy of an annoyed sentient blade.

"What do you think you are doing?" Naruto froze, his sleepy mind not recognizing the voice or the fact it was coming from inside his head.

"…getting dressed."

"Must you wear such a color? Did you know that brighter shades of orange cause heightened aggression in humans who view it? Wear black or grey instead; they're more intimidating and because they absorb light it's easier for them to alter perceptions." Naruto twitched, finally recognizing Black Mirage's mental voice.

"I like orange! You're just trying to getting me to stop wearing such a cool color like everyone else by making up that stuff about it pissing people off!" The sword scoffed.

"I'm a very old sword who has power over light. Color as humans perceive it is viewed through the reflection of light. I've been experimenting with and using my powers longer then the recorded history taught at your Academy; did you really think I wouldn't know everything I could about my domain?" Naruto didn't like the sword's smug tone at the end of his comment and decided poke holes in the story.

"Oh yeah, how would you know what's taught at the Academy? You've been sealed up!"

The sword sighed. "I told you I could read your mind yesterday, boy. When a person dreams their mind is relaxed and far more open to outside influences. I watched your entire lifespan last night as you slept. Quite frankly, I'm both amazed and incredibly disappointed with you, wielder. It seems that you cannot see the trees in the forest most of the time unless those trees happen to be on fire."

"Hey!" Naruto protested. "I can see just find!"

"You see but do not perceive, wielder. You must learn to see everything and understand even more if you are ever to use my powers to their fullest extent." Naruto felt of a flicker of emotion from the blade, but he was way too new at this sort of thing to understand what it was. "What kind of Hokage will you be if you always require your underlings to explain everything to you?"

Naruto's mouth opened and closed as the age old weapon managed to get his point to the blond without beating him over the head with it first; a startling first. The freshly graduate genin stood in front of his closet silently, turning over what the sword had said in his thoughts. Black Mirage waited patiently, having decided to speak with his currently wielder as he had his very first; small words, patiently leading sentences, and 'jabbing' him every now and then to make sure he hadn't drifted off.

"So, are you going to take my suggestions? If you must wear bright colors, at least use white. It reflects every color and gives me a broad palette to work with." Naruto shook his head, putting aside the sword's wisdom for later thought.

"Does orange really make people mad at me?"

"Not necessarily you, but they are meaner as a whole, why?"

Naruto eyed his favorite set of clothes sadly. "Maybe I should wear something else. I mean, if I'm going to be Hokage people are going to have to trust me. I can't be trusted if they're always pissed off when they see me or are afraid of me, so no black either!" Naruto shuddered slightly. "Sasuke always wears black and blue, and I don't want to be like him!"

"Fair enough. No wielder of mine should ever be confused with some one else unless we're attempting to do just that. You like bright colors right?" Naruto nodded.

"I hate being ignored, and no one ignores someone who's dressed up bright!" The sword hummed in thought.

"Nigel was like that. He did everything with flair. Despite his addiction to dreamweed he was surprisingly good at distracting people and stabbing them when they were too confused to understand what was going on. Anyways, empty out your closets and drawers, I have an idea." Doing as he was told and listening to Black Mirage describe what he had in mind, Naruto grinned.

It seemed like he'd still be pulling pranks despite being busy as a ninja.


The face of the camera guy for his ninja ID when Naruto walked in for his picture appointment was priceless. The heavy-set older man had been so stunned that he didn't even protest the strange pose. Walking away from the administrative building laughing was doing Naruto wonders. After putting together his new ensemble this morning he'd almost made it out the door before realizing that he had no clue where his new sword was! Black Mirage had had a good long laugh at his expense before taking pity on the frazzled blond and explaining the storage rune that now adorned the genin's chest. Now a lost art, the rune acted a lot like the storage scrolls that ninjas used, but with a different mechanic. Runes could hold more, the sword explained, but the more you put into one, the energy required to store it all would increase exponentially. A rune could hold an entire castle, but doing so would use so much power that not even a god would do so without a VERY good reason. Naruto had been excited about creating more of the runes as a sort of signature but Black Mirage quickly shot that down, explaining that it couldn't teach him how and even back when he'd been first made they were very rare. Still, Naruto thought as he walked into the Hokage's office, it was pretty cool to have a hiding place for his sword that no one else in the world knew how to use.

"Hey Old Man, you wanted to see me?" The Hokage raised his head to greet the boy but couldn't get a word out the moment he saw what the blond was wearing. Struggling to keep a straight face, Naruto sat in his regular chair for visits to the Old Man.

"You look terrible Old Man, something wrong?" Sarutobi snapped out of it.

"Naruto-kun, what are you wearing!"

Naruto's new ninja uniform was bizarre…even for Naruto. The only normal looking parts of the outfit were the dark tan cargo pants reinforced for combat-level wear and tear and the goggles Naruto had been wearing since starting the Academy. The latter had been left to drape around Naruto's neck since his forehead protector and its bandana now covered his forehead and most his hair. It was a smart, if strange move from Naruto who normally left his spiked hair free. The Hokage barely noticed the head covering though, unable to tear his eyes away from the bandages that wrapped around the boy's legs and arms. The bandages themselves were common enough, the tough linen wraps that many ninja used, covering most of each limb though the joints were all bare to avoid pinching and bunching. Woven into the bandages, however, were dozens of strings and ribbons, all in the most random patterns imaginable. As the elderly man's brain started to come back online, he noted that despite all the different kinds of decorations, each and everyone of them was either red, yellow, or blue. Naruto's torso was mostly covered by what looked to be a very old black leather jacket that had been cut into a vest. The time-faded leather was faded into gray at places, though these patchy areas were mostly covered by Leaf Village insignias and the swirl that was Naruto's personal symbol. Sarutobi might have eventually passed all of this off as a prank by Naruto, to try and lift spirits are the stress of last night if not for one thing.

The boy's open leather jacket-turned-vest revealed his chest and stomach, both of which were 'tattooed'.

"Naruto, what is that on your chest? More importantly, why is the Seal visible?" Naruto shrugged.

"I don't know why the Seal is visible, but it's been that way since I woke up this morning. The web-thing on my chest is where Black Mirage hides when I'm not using him." Naruto's head tilted to the side eyes blanking out for a second. "Oh. Black Mirage says that it showed up when he attached himself to my chakra network. It looks awesome though, right!" Sarutobi sighed.

"I'm not sure that advertising the Seal is such a wise idea Naruto." A bit of pain flashed across Naruto's eyes.

"I don't think it matters Old Man. Anyone who could figure out what the seal does already knows about the Fox. Besides, I need to be able reach the rune to summon Black Mirage." Sarutobi blinked.

"Rune?" Naruto brightened back up, nodding.

"Yeah. Black Mirage says it works like a summoning scroll but I don't need blood." The Third nodded. Given the sword's size, simply carrying it wasn't practical. Naruto having a summoning seal embedded in his skin was unusual, but not unheard of. Wait…

"Summoning, Naruto?"

"Yeah, it summons Black Mirage from where ever it is. He says that more then one of his previous wielders escaped prison that way!" Sarutobi smiled at Naruto's excited look and gestured for the blond to continue the story. Listening to the young boy babble on about a daring escape from prison and posse, the village leader decided that he'd leave the Seal's open display alone for now. It wasn't in Naruto's nature to blend in with the crowd. Obviously, the boy felt that he needed to confront the citizens of Konoha about their…issues about the Kyuubi and Naruto himself. Though the Third did wonder about the string…

"This time, I've got you old man!" Both ninja turned to the door at the shout. Charging towards the desk with a training shuriken in hand was a small boy wearing an odd hat and scarf that was too long for him. Letting out a warbling war cry, the boy drew back to throw the shuriken and promptly tripped, landing face down on the floor. Hissing in pain, the boy sat up rubbing his scrapes. Naruto started laughing hysterically, clutching his stomach. Sarutobi hid his chuckles, not wanting to hurt Konohamaru's feelings.

"Was that a trap? Who tripped me!" Seeing the older boy in front of him laughing, the scarf-clad boy jumped to his feet, pointing at the blond. "You! Why'd you trip me?" Naruto stopped laughing instantly. He hated being blamed for things he didn't do. People had blamed him for things when he was younger, occasionally even things he couldn't have done. Getting older, he silenced all this by pranking outrageously until all they talked about were what tricks he'd played. After learning about the Fox last night, he now knew that those people had accused him just so they could have an excuse to yell at him. Nothing had ever come of these accusation-Sarutobi personally looked over all such claims-but people kept making them. Hearing such a thing come from a boy younger then himself was infuriating. Standing, Naruto stomped over to the boy and lifted him up by his shirt.

"You! What are you doing to the Hokage's honorable grandson?" Looking over and up, Naruto spotted a tall and lanky man, wearing a Jounin outfit without the flak jacket and a pair of sunglasses. Raising an eyebrow at the Jounin, Naruto turned to the boy he was still being held up. Konohamaru smirked at the blond, positive that Naruto was like everyone else the boy had ever meet and would now promptly let him go and kiss his ass. "What do you think you are doing, brat, leave the honorable grandson alone!"

"Like I give a damn who he's related to!" Fisting his free hand, Naruto brought it down on the boys head hard enough to leave a small mark. Letting the boy drop to the floor, Naruto shoved his hands in his pockets and walked away. "We'll talk later Old Man. See ya." Ebisu snorted, turning to his student and closing his eyes in an attempt to look wiser.

"Do not concern yourself with trash like that boy, honorable grandson. Such people only exist to cause trouble and soon destroy themselves. All you can do is to distance yourself from them so you don't get involved when they go." Ebisu nodded to his own wisdom.

"What an interesting way of describing a boy I know and trust very well, Ebisu. However, my grandson is not here." Paling, Ebisu stared in fear at the Hokage, not sure if he should be more afraid of the fact that he lost the man's grandson or that he'd just insulted the Hokage's ward in his presence. "I'd suggest you move quickly Ebisu. My grandson did leave right after Naruto after all."

The Jounin raced out the door, trying to ignore the eyes boring into his back.


Naruto strode down the street, heading towards the Academy for team assignments. Despite the increased colorfulness of his outfit he was actually getting less ugly looks from the nearby adults. It seemed that losing the orange jump-suit like Black Mirage had suggested was working. He didn't suspect at all that the reason he wasn't getting as many looks was because nobody was recognizing him because of a lack of orange. A few blocks away from the Academy Naruto noticed something suspicious following him. Stepping onto an empty street, Naruto was hoping that he would be able to spot what ever it was that had pinged his 6th(danger) sense. It turned that the 'suspicious object' was the boy from the Old Man's office. Seeing the boy trying hiding as part of the street and forgetting to include his feet, Naruto decided that he just didn't have the time for this and just kept walking. Konohamaru continued to close in on his 'unsuspecting' prey. Dashing the last few meters, Konohamaru readied himself for the-

"What do you want Konohamaru? The boy stood stunned for a moment, but quickly snapped out of it when he realized that Naruto wasn't stopping.

"Wait up Boss! Tell me how you knew it was me!" Naruto chuckled.

"I'm just awesome like that. Why are you calling me Boss anyways?"

"Why wouldn't I? You're the bravest ninja in the village! You're Naruto Uzumaki right? I heard about you from grandpa and my Uncle this morning. I want you to teach me to be like you so I can take the Hokage title from grandpa." Naruto wasn't the sort of person to begrudge others their dreams, but he was curious.

"Why do you want to take his title away?" Konohamaru sighed, falling in step with Naruto as the Academy loomed closer.

"Everyone sees me as the Hokage's grandson, they don't even use my name, just honorable grandson like my teacher, Ebisu. I figure if I can take grandpa's title then everyone will see me, not him." Konohamaru looked up at Naruto, eyes blazing with determination. "That's why I want you to teach me! A guy who can break into grandpa's tower and knock him out with a single technique is sure to make me powerful enough to take on grandpa in no time!" Naruto was thinking about teaching Konohamaru the Oiroke no jutsu for shits and giggles when he heard Black Mirage mutter.

"If power alone made a leader, then I'd rule this place. Leader's are cunning and wise - or at least possessing enough common sense to fake the latter." Schooling his expression to something resembling somber, Naruto turned to Konohamaru.

"I can't teach you to take down the Old Man." Konohamaru stumbled in surprise.

"But-but why not? I promise I'll listen to you do and what you say!" Repeating something the Third had once done for him when he was young and painfully lonely, Naruto ruffled what hair stood out of Konohamaru's strange hat.

"To be honest, I only beat the Old Man 'cause I did something so crazy and stupid that he would have never expected it in a million years. The Old Man is the best ninja in the village, and if you want to beat him for real, to show everyone that you deserve to be the Hokage, then you are going to have to make a decision."

"What decision?" Konohamaru asked quietly, awed by Naruto's words. Naruto stopped, the two boys just outside the Academy gates.

"What are you willing to give? Being a Hokage is not just about being Bad-ass, even though it helps. A Hokage, a true Hokage, gives everything to their village! Their time, their love…even their lives." Naruto paused, thinking of the friends and family the Fourth had no doubt left behind to seal away the Fox. "Being the Hokage is the greatest of honors, and it requires the greatest of sacrifices." Naruto clutched the Seal on his belly as Black Mirage sent a sensation of reassurance; the best the sword could do. Konohamaru was silent for several minutes, obviously thinking about what the older had said.

"Thank you Boss. A lot of what grandpa says makes more sense now. I think, when I become Hokage, when I'm ready to be just like grandpa, that I'll tell everyone what you told me." Naruto laughed, feeling a great deal of joy knowing that he'd stoked Konohamaru's Will of Fire as the Hokage had always been there to do for him.

"Well then, Konohamaru, I'll be sure to keep the hat warm for you!" Winking, Naruto turned and walked through the gates leaving Konohamaru to sputter and protest loudly that he'd be the Fifth Hokage and not the other way around. A short ways up the street, Ebisu leaned against a store wall, his expression contemplative.

"I suppose, of all the village, it would be the Jinchuuriki who understands what it means to give ones all for the good of others." Ebisu's gaze lifted to take in the Academy. "I'll never like someone like you, brat, but I think that one day I might respect you, just a little." Shoving off the wall, Ebisu went to collect his wayward student for Taijutsu practice.


Stepping into his Academy classroom for what was probably the last time, a fond smile slipped over Naruto's face. He'd almost miss this place now that he was a ninja.

"Get a seat in the back. I want to see all your classmates. Studying people through another's memories is too inaccurate."

"Why do you need to study them anyways?"

"I wouldn't suggest talking out loud. Humans always seem to try and kill my wielder when they do that." Naruto rolled his eyes. How else was he supposed to talk to the swrod?

"Project your thoughts to me, smart ass. There is a bond between us, if an easily broken one." Naruto frowned, fidgetting in his seat. If he could speak to the sword silently, why hadn't told him so? So far all he'd been able to do is listen as it told him what to say.

"You've have been, even if you don't realize it. You just don't do it well or often. I would have already taken you through this, but I didn't want to drown you in information." That, and the sword was pretty sure that the easily distracted blond had already forgotten some of what the sword had told him.

A faint rumbling sound caught everyone's attention and the whole class turned to the door. With a bang, it flew open and Sakura and Ino shoved through the doorway together.

"FIRST!"

As Naruto sighed dreamily and stared at Sakura, Black Mirage began cringing in pain. As a sword empowered towards the visual realms, he didn't much like loud noises. Naruto, he put up with because the kid had some serious potential and a real drive to harness it, but the these two shrieking girls and the equally offensive kunoichi that were joining them were all straining his tolerance. As the sound built and built to the point were Iruka's entrance was completely missed and even Naruto was covering his ears, Black Mirage decided that he'd had enough.

"SHUT THE FUCKING HELL UP YOU MISERABLE LITTLE CUNTS! IF I HEAR ONE MORE SOUND OUT OF ANY OF YOU I'M GOING TO GUT YOU ALL!"

Dead silence fell on the room as everyone turned to the back and stared at Naruto, who they didn't recognize at first. Regaining control of his body, Naruto's mind went completely blank as he struggled to find a reaction to not only losing control of his mouth, but being stared at by the entire class for threatening them. Luckily, Iruka stepped into the silence with a cough.

"While that was a little…extreme, thank you Naruto." Gasps abounded.

"That's Naruto!" Sakura yelled, having never dreamed that Naruto of all people would threaten bodily harm to the entire class, much less the girls.

"It's him. Now everyone take your seats." Watching his students file to the closest seats, Iruka sighed. The mood in the room was now totally wrong for his usual end of the year speech. He liked that speech damn it.

"Sensei, why are you covered in bandages and what happened to Naruto?" Iruka sighed again and pinched his nose.

"I was involved in a fight last night, which is why I'm hurt, but I have no idea what your asking about Naruto."

"He yelled at us!" Sakura shouted, not used to the blond raising his voice to her at all.

"His clothes!" Ino chimed in, incredibly curious about why Naruto was wearing that weird mess of strings.

In the Hokage's office, the village leader and all the gathered Jounin in his office to watch the new students via crystal ball perked up, rather curious themselves.

Iruka shrugged. "Naruto, care to explain to your classmates the sudden change of clothes." Naruto blinked.

"It's for a technique I know. It's the first of a school of techniques so I changed my gear to make them easier. It'll change again when I get better at them, but this is what I'm going with for the start of my ninja career." Most of the class seemed interested in what kind of technique would require that kind of coloring, but one student saw an opportunity.

"Yeah right Naruto! Even if you learned some freaky technique, it's probably just something stupid like that naked transformation you're always doing! I bet Sasuke-kun could come up with a much cooler technique on his own, right Sasuke-kun!" As Sakura's voice rose to croon Sasuke's name, Black Mirage snarled.

"That pink-haired bitch has THE single most annoying voice I've ever heard! She must suffer!" Scowling, Naruto crossed his arms. Thinking Sakura's comment had sent into a sulk, the rest of the class turned around and Iruka started handing out team assignments.

"Sakura is nicest, prettiest girl in the class. I really like her."

"Name one nice thing she's ever done for you." Naruto tried to snap off a few examples of Sakura's greatest and gentleness, but he found himself unable to think of one.

"Name one thing, physically, that sets her apart from the rest of these girls."

"Her hair!" He shot back.

"That girl with the white eyes has blue hair, and on the way here I spotted a woman with purple hair through your eyes. Try again."

"Well, I uh, well I like her and that's too bad!" Black Mirage snorted in amusement.

"What a way to win an argument. By the way your name was called. You're on a team with the pink harpy and that Sasuke child you dislike." Before Naruto could ask what a harpy was, Iruka spoke up.

"I just wanted to say, before I go, that I will miss you all, I know that you all will make me proud as true ninja. Good bye everyone." Sliding open the door, he left, letting in a group of Jounin who spread out, and started calling out team numbers.


Hours later, Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto were sitting in the classroom waiting for their new sensei to arrive. Sasuke was bored, but dealing with it. Sakura was a hair away from snapping and attacking the first person to irritate her. Naruto would have been even worse then her had not Black Mirage spent the last few hours discussing what he could and could not do. The sword was reasonably certain he'd gotten through to the boy.

Clack.

All three genin turned to door. Standing in the doorway was a tall, masked Jounin. Silver hair jutted up like broom bristles and his left eye was covered by forehead protector, leaving only a thin band of his face visible. Sweeping his eye over the kids, the man gave a tinny nod. "Team 7, follow me." Standing, the genin obediently followed him outside to a small park. Waving his hand, their sensei had them sit in front of him while he sat on a railing. "Alright. Let's introduce ourselves. Maybe a little self-description."

"Why don't you go first." Naruto challenged, not liking the man's attitude.

"I'm Kakashi Hatake. I'm an elite Jounin. My likes and dislikes are personal. I have a dream, but you're all a little young to hear it. Who wants to go next?"

"I will sensei!" Sakura wasn't thrilled with such a poor introduction, but she wasn't going to make a bad first impression; that was Naruto's job! "My name is Sakura Haruno, a genin of Konoha! I was the best kunoichi of class, so I'm sure I will do well in your care sensei. I like…a certain person and my dream is to…is to…!" Glancing at Sasuke, Sakura squealed, drawing winces from Kakashi whose hearing was well-above human average and Naruto who was forced to deal with a very angry Black Mirage. "As for my dislikes, Naruto and Ino!"

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, but just pointed at Sasuke.

"Sasuke Uchiha. I don't have many likes, and there are many annoying things I hate." Sakura completely missed the look Sasuke sent her way. "My only ambition is to kill a certain man." Kakashi didn't react, having already read the team's profile.

"Mr. Rainbow, you're up."

"Naruto Uzumaki here, future Hokage! I love ramen, training," Naruto started to say Sakura but an angry buzz from his sword made him rethink it. "and my new blade and techniques. I hate waiting for my ramen to cook and jerks who can't get their heads out of their asses! My dreams and ambitions are the same thing, to be a truly legendary Hokage!"

Interesting. His profile didn't mention him being a kenjutsu practitioner. That sword that Hokage-sama mentioned must have been acquired very recently.

"Well, now that that's out of the way, I have a few things to say. Tomorrow, there will a test. A finale test that will decide if you remain genin or receive remedial training."

"Remedial training? What kind of test is it!"

"A survival test, with a mere 33% chance of passing." All three genin stared in shock. "Meet at training ground 7, tomorrow at 7am. Oh. One last thing. You probably shouldn't eat tomorrow morning, you might throw up." That said, Kakashi vanished in a swirl of leaves.

Sensing opportunity, Naruto turned to Sakura. "Want to get lunch Sakura? We could talk about tomorrow's test and try and make a plan." Ignoring him completely, Sakura raced after Sasuke who was trying to make a clean escape.

"Sasuke-kun! Lets have lunch!"

"And you adore this girl why?" Trying to hide his disappointment from the sword, Naruto headed to one of his favorite practice areas. If they were going have such an important test tomorrow then he was definitely going to need to practice.


10 in the morning found team 7 still standing around, waiting for their sensei to arrive. Sasuke and Sakura had gone past bored and into angry, though only Sakura was showing any sign of it. Naruto was once again distracted by talking with Black Mirage. This was no coincidence. The sword had noted the boy's short attention span and had been working with it. Every time Naruto started getting twitchy, Black Mirage would mention a trick or technique he'd seen at one point or another in his centuries long existence. A lot of what he talked about was either not in Naruto's skill-range or flat out impossible for the boy but brain-storming about ways of pulling them off worked marvelously at keeping him busy.

"Yo!"

"YOU'RE LATE!"

"SHAR'S TEAT BITCH, STOP SCREAMING!"

Kakashi blinked in surprise at that exchange, wondering why Naruto's profile said he was infatuated with the pink-haired girl. Sasuke simply enjoyed the silence of Naruto's embarrassment and Sakura's hurt at being yelled at by a boy who'd admired her forever. Inner Sakura was NOT a happy camper with this new development and was gearing up to unleash Hell on Naruto when Kakashi saved his life.

"Ahem. If you all are done, there is a test to be taken." Walking up to a stump on the training ground whose top had been smoothed for use as a table or seat, Kakashi put down a wind-up clock and a pair of packed lunches. "Alright, the test is simple. In order to pass, you must have one of these bells." Removing a pair of plain bells from a pocket with a small flourish, Kakashi then attached them to his belt.

"But sensei," Sakura murmured. "they're only two bells. Shouldn't there be three."

"No, there shouldn't. Now, you have until noon. If you want to pass, you should come at me with all your strength and killing intent."

Naruto raised his hand. "Are you sure, sensei. Wouldn't that be dangerous to you?"

Kakashi's smile was visible through the mask. "I wouldn't be much of a Jounin if I couldn't take on a few genin and avoid getting hurt. The test starts…now!"

Sasuke and Sakura figures blurred as they dashed to the edge of the clearing to conceal themselves. Naruto on the hand, didn't move. Kakashi raised an eyebrow inquisitively.

"You want something Naruto?"

"You SURE you want us to hit you with everything?"

"Very sure Naruto. Though I am beginning to wonder if you're just stalling for some reason…"

"Ok, if you say so." Reassured that he wasn't going to get in trouble for this, Naruto stunned his audience.

He reached into his chest, his hand disappearing up to his wrist.

Kakashi stared. "What the Hell…" "Hokage-sama seems to have not mentioned a few things..."

"You said to use everything I had Kakashi-sensei, so I guess you get to meet Black Mirage." Kakashi watched intently as Naruto drew a black-bladed sword nearly as long as the boy was tall out of his chest. The Jounin also noted the pattern on the boy's chest fading into invisibility as the blade cleared it. Smiling, Naruto took up a two-handed grip, setting the sword in a clumsy defensive posture.

"I take it that sword is called Black Mirage?" Naruto smiled.

"Yep. This is our first trick, Mirror Image!" Without a sound, puff of smoke, and only the slightest surge of chakra, 9 copies of Naruto appeared.

"A Bunshin, that doesn't seem very impressive."

"It gets better." Naruto shot back as the 10 Naruto split up and surrounded Kakashi. Swiveling his head, Kakashi noted that several of the copies were outside the range any genin sound have been able to manage.

"Ahh, enhanced Bunshin. But still, just Bunshin." Naruto grinned, followed shortly by all the Bushin charging with him. As they closed in and Kakashi readied himself for combat, Naruto managed to surprise the Jounin.

"Blur."

It was something like a watercolor painting getting hit by a bucket of water. All the colors in Naruto's clothes began swirling and mixing with each other, blending into the ground and surroundings as well. The technique had a secondary effect. Naruto was casting 'shadows'. Every time he moved so much as an inch, his outline became wildly broken up, leaving only his center mass as the only thing even reasonably visible. Even then, real accuracy was all but impossible. It was, Kakashi noted, a very effective genjutsu, made all the more potent by the fact that it was done seal-less at the last second. Channeling chakra, Kakashi leapt up and back, coming away from the rush with just a swallow cut thanks to Naruto's lack of skill with a blade.

"That," Kakashi noted "is a very, very dangerous trick."

"Thanks sensei." The Naruto's approached, the blurring effect getting worse when they stood next to each other. "Just remember, you asked for my best." With that, Naruto rushed in again.

Focusing on sound more then sight this time, Kakashi easily avoided getting hit again. It was harder then any genin should have made it, which Kakashi attributed to Naruto's ruthless attempts to take advantage of the 'Blur' technique.

Still, I can keep this up longer then he can. And if he hasn't made more copies by now, then I doubt he could. All I've got to do is pin down his next move and -

THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK!

Naruto hesitated, watching a swarm of kunai hit his teacher in some rather lethal spots. A moment later 'Kakashi' poofed and turned into a pin-cushioned log. The pause cost Naruto though, having held still long enough for most of the blurring to fade away.

POW!

The blurring completely disappeared as Naruto tumbled through the air, his concentration shattered by the swift kick to his ass from Kakashi. After landing in the river, the Mirror Images vanished.

Feeling a spurt of satisfaction, Kakashi raced to where he could see Sasuke dashing through the woods. The bottom of the class had an interesting trick, best to face the top of the class with a hint of caution.


Sitting at the bottom of river, looking supremely pissed off, Naruto pondered his next move. He had about 10 minutes of air thanks to one of the tricks he'd heard about from Black Mirage. The sword was quietly impressed by the speed the boy had picked up the secret to this trick, and decided to toss the boy a bone.

"It's time to take the kid gloves off wielder. Shall we try something, mean?"

"Lets."


"I didn't get to make this speech earlier, but there are three core principles to being a ninja. Taijutsu, Ninjutsu, Genjutsu; care to try one out?" Sasuke spun around to see his new sensei watching him lazily.

"Naruto might have had a cheap trick, but I'm better then him."

"We'll see." Sasuke launched himself at Kakashi, starting a furious Taijutsu assault. Kakashi instantly noted the difference in skill level between Naruto and Sasuke, with Sasuke being much higher. Still, it wasn't getting him a bell, and they both knew it. Jumping back, Sasuke started flipping through hand seals rapidly.

"…shit."

"Goukakyuu no Jutsu." Sasuke watched calmly as the fireball sputtered out, expecting a royal pissed off but injured and weakened Jounin. But, there was nothing.

"Where is he? The sides, above me…behind?"

"Below! Shinjuu Zanshu no Jutsu(Double Suicide Decapitation technique)." A moment later, Sasuke was completely immobilized. Stepping out of the earth and brushing himself off, Kakashi eyed Sasuke.

"By technique, you ARE better, but he uses what he has very well. Think about it. Now, to traumatize a fan-girl of yours." Kakashi once again disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

After arriving near Sakura, Kakashi had expected the pink-haired girl to put up a decent fight like both her teammates. She proved to be incredibly disappointing, fainting after a quick hell-viewing Genjutsu, something her profile said she was inclined to. Deciding to play with Naruto some more before the timer went off, Kakashi headed to the river to pick up the boy's trail.

What he found was Naruto floating face down in the river, partially weighed down by the sword still gripped in his hand.

"Ohshitohshitohshitoshit! Hokage-sama is going to kill me for this!" Diving into the river, Kakashi reached in to pull the boy and out to try mouth to mouth. When he tried to grab the boy's vest though, his hand went straight through.

I just jumped into a river after my 'drowned' Genjutsu-specialist genin. Way to go, Kakashi.

KAR-BOOM!

An exploding note embedded on the river bed and pumped with chakra to stall it's soaking and destruction went off a few feet from Kakashi and launched the unsuspecting Jounin well into the clearing. Steaming, the silver-haired ninja made a mental note to avoid truly pissing off the blond; at all, ever.

Slightly concussed, the Jounin missed the ringing off the bells as they were taken off his belt, though he did see them float away. Kakashi was about to lunge for the genin and take them back(while inflicting some well deserved vengeance) when the timer finally went off.

Sigh. "Wait here Naruto, I'm going to grab your teammates."


"Kakashi-sensei, why is Sakura-chan tied to the log?" The restrained girl glared hatefully at her sensei.

"She failed to even make an attempt at the bells, unlike Sasuke who managed to brush against them. The fact that you actually GOT the bells just makes her look ridiculous."

"But what's the gag for?" Sakura attempted to scream out support for the sentiment, but failed to get more then faint groaning.

"She yells, loudly and at pitches that make my head feel like an ice pick has been jammed through my temples." Naruto squirmed guiltily, having recently noticed that fact due to Black Mirage's rants on 'that damn harpy whore!'. "Now, I'm afraid that Sasuke and Sakura haven't passed my test. However, since Naruto has, I will allow you two a second chance after lunch. But! For that dismal performance, Sakura is not allowed to eat anything. Later" Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Taking a quick look around, Naruto ripped Sakura's gag out and held out a piece of his lunch. "Eat up Sakura-chan, you'll need your strength for the test." The pinkette would have protested getting food from Naruto of all people but her stomach gurgled, demanding sustenance since she had skipped breakfast. Watching the two, Sasuke scoffed. Still, the blond idiot had some how managed to get the bells, so perhaps he wasn't completely useless, but his pink-haired fan girl was good for nothing but a distraction. Sasuke blinked. That was it! That was how he was going to get a bell(provided Kakashi could get Naruto to hand them back at some point)! He was going to use Sakura as a distraction then swoop in and snatch a bell the way Naruto had probably used those advanced Bushin. Praying she didn't look too deep into it, Sasuke picked up a piece of his own lunch and held it out to Sakura, who blushed. If only the fan-girl hadn't starved herself, this wouldn't be necessary.

"YOU! YOU'VE BROKEN THE RULES!" Scared shitless, team 7 watched their sensei appear and glare at them with a highly effective dramatic background. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE PUNISHMENT FOR BREAKING THE RULES IS?" The genin shook their heads.

"You three…pass!"


"Team 1, remedial training."

"Team2, remedial training."

"Team 3, ditto."

"Team 4, 'sigh' training."

"Team 5, remedial training."

"Team 6, another bunch of remedials." Number 7 was skipped as it was not nearly late enough for Kakashi to be here.

"Team 8 passes." There were some soft murmurs given that the Jounin of 8 was a rookie, but no one said a word against her.

"Team 9 is still active from last year. Asuma?"

"Team 10 passes dad." Whispers and nods abounded. Team 10 was the second Ino-Shika-Chou team and nobody had expected them to fail.

"Has anyone seen Kakashi yet?"

"Why bother Hokage-sama, Kakashi never passes anyone."

"Sorry I'm late. A blond fox thought it would be funny to hit me with an exploding note." People turned to comment on Kakashi's idea of a joke but promptly shut up when they realized that he had a bandage wrapped around his head.

Sarutobi puffed on his pipe, deciding to get the ball rolling despite having a good idea what happened anyway. "An exploding note you say, that's a rather serious accusation." Kakashi waved it away.

"It was during the test, so it was perfectly legal. Surprised the crap out of me though, and threw me over a river." Loud whispers and not so quite murmurs filled the meeting room.

"Quiet!" Getting his silence, the Hokage gestured for Kakashi to continue. Looks were exchanged as the ex-ANBU described the fight that afternoon, glossing over nothing. In the silence that followed, Kurenai stepped forward.

"Hokage-sama, if Naruto was such a promising Genjutsu master, why wasn't he placed on my team?" The Third smiled gently at the rookie Jounin.

"It's because he couldn't use genjutsu at all till he found that sword; the Black Mirage. From what Naruto has told me, it acts as a focusing lens, converting pure chakra in genjutsu based on Naruto's will. It is a very powerful sword, but incredibly picky about those who wield it. Naruto is one of less then a dozen people to have ever held it and survived." Kurenai winced, nebulous thoughts of trying her hand at the useful sounding weapon dying quickly.

"I see. Still, Hokage-sama, perhaps it would be best I helped him with the basics." Kakashi muttered something quietly about the blond being enough of a menace without them.

"That sounds like a good idea, Kurenai. The boy probably needs a review of all the basics considering where that traitor Mizuki worked. In fact…"


Later that night, Naruto lay in bed contemplating his sensei's words at the Memorial Stone about those lower then trash. It was, Naruto thought, a good philosophy for a Hokage to have. Slowly, the blond drifted to sleep, dreaming of all his comrades. The people he would gladly give his life for.


Author's Note: As most of you noticed, I changed several scenes in this chapter. This is because I'm writing for an adult audience. I don't need or want the childish humor and stupid jokes and scenes that filled the early half of the Naruto series. These changes will make things a little rougher for the cast members, but such is the life of AU characters.

FYI, the Black Mirage has no control over sound, one of the blade's biggest weaknesses when it comes to it's illusions. Happily, the Naruto universe already has a fairly common trick to help overcome this weakness, though not completely.

Tigee86.