firsova prompted: "I just want soulmates!seblaine so badly and you haven't write something like that as I remember. bless you *з*"
summary: Ever since he was little, Blaine's heard the story about your soulmate's name being written on your wrist. At sixteen, Kurt Hummel appears on his skin, and yet he can't seem to shake the attraction and connection he has to one Sebastian Smythe.
notes: kurt and blaine never transfer to McKinley, this is just Dalton based.
notes2: Thanks to sophisticatedloserchick who gave me a soulmate quote that inspired parts in this chapter and really helped me think about the difference between what a soulmate can be and what they sometimes simply are.
Part two of three.

000

Kurt avoids him for weeks, leaving them in this limbo that makes him feel sort of helpless, regardless of what his wrist says. It's probably a good thing they're on winter break, Blaine doesn't have to worry about running into him in the halls or trying to come up with a schedule where one of them is in the dorm room while the other is not, avoiding eye contact during Warblers practice…but the problem is that they don't try and resolve anything before heading back to school.

And Blaine thought they would have at least talked to one another before then.

But there's nothing. They head back to school in even worse shape. The red string between them feels frayed, chopped up, tied back together in places where they've snapped apart from one another. The string will never be pristine again, it'll never feel or be like it was.

A coffee is set down in front of him and he looks up to see Sebastian, a breath of fresh air into his lungs as his eyes travel over his long and lanky form. His blazer isn't buttoned at his waist, it hangs loosely on his shoulders as he sits across from him and Blaine can catch hints of his skin and strong, expensive cologne that settles into his stomach like a punch to his gut.

"You look awful and for as many compliments as I like to give you," Sebastian shakes his head. "That's saying something. What's wrong?"

Blaine doesn't respond and wraps his hands around the coffee cup instead, like it anchors him to the table and this conversation, the heat burning the pads of his fingers.

"I think…"

Sebastian waits, is patient, sips on his own coffee and nods his head to a guy across the room that Blaine doesn't know.

"Kurt wanted to take a break." It sounds weird, saying it out loud, putting it out there into the space of air between them. There's so much more to it than that but he doesn't have the energy to explain…doesn't know if he could really do so anyways.

The taller hums, like he's not surprised in the slightest and Blaine takes a sip of his coffee without blowing on it first. The liquid scalds his tongue, but it's sort of comforting in a way, and his heart warms to the fact that it's just how he likes it—medium drip, with extra cream and cinnamon. Of course Sebastian knows his coffee order.

He expects a million different things out of Sebastian; a flirty wink, a snide remark, a hurtful comment about Kurt maybe, for him to bring up that kiss that happened so long ago (or at least that's what it feels like—but he can still sense the impression of his lips on his own, his breathy moan as Sebastian slides his tongue into his mouth) but what comes out instead is—

"Did Kurt say he wanted to see other people while on this break?"

Blaine swallows, looks down at the coffee cup between his hands in contemplation. He honestly hadn't thought about that. He doesn't even know how to go on a date, not really anyway. He and Kurt had sort of skipped over dating and had gone right to being boyfriends. And sure, they had had dates after that, but going out with someone without being in a relationship is obviously a different experience.

"He didn't exactly spell out to me the terms of our break Sebastian, we had a fight and he left."

"I'm just saying," Sebastian leans back in his chair and Blaine pointedly ignores how his legs open up, just slightly, under the table. "You could use this as an opportunity. Go out. Have fun," He smiles at him. "See everything that you've been missing out on."

Blaine looks at him for a moment, contemplating the idea a lot longer than he should be. "I'm not exactly the dating type."

Sebastian snorts. "We need to stop hanging out, you're starting to sound like me."

A soft smile teases the ends of his mouth before he runs a hand through his hair. It's not as organized as it usually is, a bunch of mismatch curls springing out of his gel. He's not sure what Sebastian is proposing, exactly, stuck between trusting him wholeheartedly and approaching him with caution. It's that medium that attracts him the most, he realizes, because Sebastian can be surprising and unpredictable and being with him sometimes is nearly intoxicating.

It's wrong and somehow perfect at the same time.

"I don't know." He says softly, his voice hesitant but open for Sebastian to convince him.

And he does. "Look if you're so assured by the fact that Kurt is the one on your wrist then a meaningless night out isn't going to change that."

Blaine sighs before tapping his fingers on the table, looking into Sebastian's eyes before slowly nodding his head. Maybe taking a chance will get the urge out of his system.

"Okay." He whispers and Sebastian grins.

"Okay."

000

It turns out he has no idea what to wear on a non-date…outing. It's weird because it's sort of a date, even though Sebastian would never use that classification and he's not sure if he wants to either because of Kurt. They're taking a break, they're not broken up. But he's spending the night with another boy, maybe eating and hanging out and really, isn't that what a date is? He has no idea what's in store for him because Sebastian wouldn't tell him but he finds that sort of thrilling in a way he probably shouldn't.

Blaine rubs at his wrist before putting his bowtie into place for the fifteenth time, his mother knocking on his door to poke her head in as he looks at himself in the mirror.

"Oh, I didn't realize you were going out for the night," She smiles and comes in, putting her hands on his shoulders. She smells like sunflowers and cooking oil. "I was going to make potato pancakes for dinner."

"No, I uh, I have a thing." Thing. A non-date but sort of date thing. With a boy who doesn't believe in dates or soulmates for that matter.

"Kurt can stay for dinner and then you two can go out." She offers, "There's not many places to eat around here that isn't Breadstix." She winks and the expression causes a weight that feels like stone to drop in his belly.

He feels guilty.

"It's not with Kurt." He swallows and looks down at his hands a moment. "It's not a date either." He says quickly, probably too fast because his mother raises her eyebrows. "It's…it's with a boy from school. His name is Sebastian."

"Sebastian." She smiles softly and turns him around, letting her fingers trail through his hair and loosen it from the gel a little bit. "But it's not a date, hmm?"

"No, he uh—I wouldn't do that to Kurt." He frowns. "He's my soulmate." He says it like that's an explanation enough but it's starting to feel like some sort of excuse.

Blaine expects his mother to give him this look like she's disappointed or wary of his decision to spend time with a boy who isn't his soulmate. He thinks about the red string, how it's probably perfectly tied around his mother's wrist and linking her to his father somewhere else in the house. How it's probably not frayed and tied at certain places to keep it together like it is between him and Kurt.

"I think you're thinking too hard about what that word really means. Soulmate can have many connotations."

She smiles at him, turning him back around to look at the mirror. She tugs on the bowtie and shakes her head and Blaine quickly undoes the fabric and tugs it away from his neck. He unbuttons the top button and lets the collars fall apart from one another. She hums in approval, rubbing his arms.

"People think a soulmate is their perfect fit, and in some ways they are," Blaine thinks about the ways he and Kurt really fit together, the way it makes him feel when it feels like everything is sliding perfectly into place. "But they can also be like a mirror," His eyes find her gaze in the mirror and then his own, bright hazel shining back at him.

He thinks of intense green ones.

"Showing you everything that's holding you back, someone who tears down your walls and shakes you awake. Show you obstacles and addictions, breaks your heart so you can start over."

"I love Kurt."

"Because your wrist told you to?"

Blaine's not even sure if she's talking about Kurt anymore, he can't tell. He's not sure when the lines he thought organized everything became so blurred. He thought he could rely on the name on his wrist to tell him everything he needed to do but what if Sebastian was right? What if the person you were fated to be didn't complete you the way you thought they could?

"Have fun tonight, okay?" She smiles, squeezing his arms. "Try not to stay out too late."

There's a million and one things he wants to ask her but he doesn't know where to start. He watches her leave, looking at his reflection in the mirror before pulling a cardigan on to slide the fabric down over his wrists.

Out of sight out of mind.

000

Sebastian picks him up, right on time, and his mother waves at them as he gets in the car. The taller chuckles when he starts the engine, pulling out of the driveway as Blaine puts his seatbelt on.

"I feel like I should have assured her I would be on my best behavior with her son." He winks and Blaine flushes.

"There's no reason to lie to my mother Sebastian." He teases and the other smirks, his long fingers running over the circular rim of the steering wheel. The action doesn't cause him to stare or anything.

The night is cold, it's stopped snowing for the night, he thinks, but everything has a layering of fluffy white. It glitters when the headlights hit patches and when the moon peeks out from behind the clouds. The heat in the car is comforting, warms the very bits of him that felt frozen even from the short distance between his house and the car. He leans back into the seat, sticking his hands in his pockets, trying not to watch how the muscles in Sebastian's arms and neck contract and relax as he drives.

He has no idea what's in store for the night but when Sebastian pulls the car over and there's nothing to the sides of them but snow, woods and trees, he gets a bit worried.

"This isn't the part where you assure me that no one can hear me scream and then murder me, right?"

Sebastian smirks, shaking his head as he pulls the keys from the ignition. "So dramatic, come on."

Blaine pulls a beanie out of his coat pocket as he gets out of the car, pulling it over his curls as he follows Sebastian into the woods. The taller has a flashlight but it's really not needed, surprisingly, with the brightness of the moon overhead. He steps over snow covered logs and winds between trees and watches as puffs of air leave Sebastian's lips like cigarette smoke.

He hears the trickling of water in the distance and they come to a stop at a creek. Most of it is frozen over, between rocks and sticks that have fallen into the water from trees overhead. Blaine imagines that it'd probably be gorgeous around the summer time, the sun winding through the leaves of the trees and sparkling along the water. The rush of the stream over those rocks and sticks and the splash against the edges, licking onto the dirt.

Some of the water is springing free of the ice, gliding over the surface. He moves to press his boot onto the ice and watches it crack under his force, the water engulfing the toe of his shoe a moment before rushing down the creek.

It's just as beautiful now as it would be in the summer. Everything is dead but the water is pressing up against the ice, escaping, trying to show some signs of vitality. He sort of gets that, in a way, wanting to break free after a while of feeling constrained.

Sebastian bumps his shoulder into his own, giving him a small smile. "I thought you'd like it here. Didn't you tell me during coffee one time that you used to do something like this with your brother in the summer?"

Blaine tugs the beanie down over his ears and turns his head to look at Sebastian, a mixture of surprise and affection building up in his chest cavity at the thought that he actually remembered something he told him about his family. There was a lot more to Sebastian Smythe that a lot of people, even himself sometimes, didn't realize. He was willing to listen to him even though it was a boring story about Cooper and sunburn and throwing rocks into a stream. About how that was one of the last times he felt connected to him like brothers, before competitions and distance and Blaine feeling like he always had to prove himself to his parents where Cooper just sailed through with approval.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Sebastian asks, almost amused sounding. "I have ears okay? And you droned on about that summer for a whole ten minutes, I couldn't block you out at that point."

He knows it's a defense mechanism of Sebastian's to somehow cheapen the moment, to try and avoid how bringing him here actually means a lot to Blaine, but he doesn't say anything. Instead he squeezes his hands in his pockets and leans up on his toes, presses his lips to Sebastian's.

It's the second time he's kissed Sebastian but the first time he's really meant it.

The first time had been a combination of desperation, of proximity, of the fact that Sebastian's breath sort of smelled like intoxicating alcohol and the press of their bodies against one another's.

This was purer, in a way, this felt real. The cold nipping at his cheeks and the dryness of their lips, the soft noise that leaves Sebastian's mouth and the way he puts himself back onto the heels of his feet when the kiss is finished.

"Was that an accident?" Sebastian asks because he probably expects Blaine to regret it, to explain with words that sound like accident or mistake or coincidence. A soft smile plays with his lips as Blaine feels his tongue sneak out and wet his own, brushing against his lower lip.

It sends a shiver down Blaine's spine and Sebastian wraps his arms around his waist because he thinks he's cold. He lets him.

An accident. He could say that, he can pretend that this kiss had never happened like the first.

"Definitely not." Blaine says instead and let's their foreheads rest together.

000

When he comes home that night his cheeks are chapped from the cold and his lips are red from small kisses to Sebastian's lips. His heart is warm and his chest is light and it's like his mother can read words etched onto his ribcage, see right through him.

"Did you have fun with Sebastian?" She asks, sets down the book she was reading as she stands in the living room, moving towards the kitchen to make them tea.

"Yeah," He says, almost breathlessly.

"People can take you by surprise if you let them," She says, puts the kettle on the stove and turns the fire on. It's like she's reading his mind or something because that's all Sebastian seems to be doing lately: taking him by surprise.

His sleeve slides down his arm as he reaches into a cupboard above the stove to get down some teacups, the cursive K and H naturally grabbing his attention. His skin is red and he frowns as he runs his thumb over the area, trying to swallow the sensation about how odd Kurt's name is starting to look on his wrist.

Blaine turns towards his mother, leans against the counter for a moment. He wants to ask her if it's possible for someone to have two soulmates…but finds it more exciting and unpredictable if he tries to figure it out on his own.

000

What's great and at the same time downright frustrating about Sebastian is that they don't talk about the things that they probably should or need to. That thing between them at the creek develops over a month, he and Kurt are still on the outs, not talking, not discussing whether or not they're broken up or just broken.

That seems to be a common theme that he keeps coming across these days.

Maybe it's better that they don't talk about it. Sebastian doesn't do things like commitment and while Blaine's never been okay with causal anything, the taller's hands are warm when they settle on his waist or slide between his fingers and his lips are soft and teasing as they nip at the skin of his neck or kiss his lower lip. His touch is addicting and he can't seem to pull himself away from the black hole that is Sebastian Smythe.

He makes Blaine feel good, in ways that he never thought he could. He makes him consider things about his life that he's missing or had all along, he breaks him open and fishes out his doubts and insecurities and it scares the ever living shit out of him.

Because he can't tell what's going to happen next. Nothing is predictable, everything is on accident. Everything is a mistake.

But it's never felt so right.

Blaine doesn't like the feeling of not knowing what he's doing, of not having a semblance of control. He doesn't believe in those people who date between ending up with their soulmate because what's the point anyways? And that's what he'd be doing if he broke up with Kurt. If he saw Sebastian and let him in, let him burrow between the spaces of his ribs, grow there, sprout petals.

All that he knows is that he needs to do something, even if it's not exactly the right thing. Even though it might go against things he's believed before. He has to do something. And sitting there while letting his coffee rapidly cool is not one of them.

He finds Kurt in the library and pauses at the table. "We need to talk."

Kurt looks up at him and nods slowly, motioning for Blaine to sit down. "Yes, we do." He pulls the chair out and sits, glancing around at some people milling around the stacks, not paying any close attention to them.

He feels a certain amount of courage build up in his ribcage, the enthralling and terrifying sensation flare under his lungs, burning them as he holds his breath, as words tumble in his mouth itching to get out. He manages to part his lips, starting to form the sentence, a thrilling hand-like grasp squeezing his stomach—

"It was a mistake for me to lash out at you," Kurt says, taking the wind right out of his sails. He hopes his visible deflation isn't as obvious as it feels. "I…I overreacted about Sebastian. About everything."

Out of everything he had expected to happen when he found Kurt at the library, an apology from him hadn't been one of them.

He feels like all the oxygen has been sucked out of the room, his hearing leveling out and his body numb, everything suddenly dull but hypersensitive, like he's underwater. Kurt's talking but he can't really make out what he's saying and he feels sweat kiss the back of his neck.

"Blaine?" Kurt places his hand on his and he suddenly snaps back into place, whiplash clear in his features. "I miss you. God, I…" He shakes his head, his fingers curling in on his own.

No, he gets it without Kurt needing to say anything. It's easy how you can miss something when you risk losing it, when it's gone.

And just like that his resolve snaps, like a rubber band inside him, and everything he had wanted to say gets swallowed up—buried deep inside of him where he can't find it again. His fingers worry over his wrist with Kurt's name on it, the skin red and raw from his touch.

He can't find it in himself to break up with Kurt…because Kurt's here apologizing. And doesn't he owe it to them, to their relationship thus far, to make it work? Because they're going to end up together anyways? Because chances are terrifying and they can hurt and turn into mistakes.

"It's okay, I'm sorry too." Blaine says, even though he's not. He's got nothing to apologize for.

Kurt smiles and hugs him, squeezes him so tight like Blaine might evaporate. Blaine presses his nose into Kurt's shoulder, closes his eyes, and wonders if there will ever come a point where he can selfishly make a decision for himself.

000

Blaine likes to consider himself an observant person, he has keen senses in terms of judging how a person feels and from there he works out how he can help; whether it's a listening ear, advice or a shoulder to cry on. His mother tells him it's a blessing and a curse at the same time because while it makes him a better friend and boyfriend it tends to mean that he puts others needs before his own.

Constantly.

But it's because of his detailed observations that he knows something isn't right with Sebastian.

It's small at first, barely noticeable, but his smirk doesn't quite meet his eyes. He stops hitting on him, or the flirtatious comments are reused and non-imaginative at best. He stops trying to make him laugh or blush, and he forgets coffee dates constantly.

But then it's more prominent, in the way Sebastian's carrying himself. He's demeanor is less tall, he shrinks in on himself, and he's mean. Blaine used to understand his snarky comments; in a way they were just shielding other people from getting close to who Sebastian is, behind the mask, but his banter recently has been jagged. Crude. Meant to hurt other people instead of using it as a shield to hide himself.

He watches him sometimes in Biology, the sunlight creeps through the window and highlights the freckles on his cheeks, makes his eyes brighter, brings out the very soft burnt orange tone to his brown hair. Sebastian would sometimes catch his gaze and pointedly lick his lips or make a sexual gesture to get Blaine to laugh or blush.

But he does neither now and all Blaine can do is watch Sebastian avoid his gaze and rub at his wrist, playing with the material of his button down shirt like he's bothered or distracted. When the bell rings Blaine barely has time to catch up with him as he bolts out of the room, long legs carrying him down the expanse of the hallway.

Blaine catches his arm, tugs him to a halt. "Hey, wait. I wanted to talk to you."

Sebastian licks his lips, holds himself tightly together as he pauses, lets a slow breath out like it's agonizing. "What? I'm going to be late for a History test."

He doesn't expect the brush off and it stutters his speech a moment before he restarts. "Have you been avoiding me?" Sebastian laughs but that doesn't answer his question. "Is this about…" He takes a step forward, lowers his voice. "The kiss in the woods?" He knows that they haven't talked about it…but he expects it's the same old story with Sebastian.

They pretend it never happened even though it's clearly meant something to the both of them. Blaine thinks that in the span of a month where Kurt was absent and Sebastian was there that they could have been something more than they are. Develop it into something that matters even though there's always this sort of roadblock between their bodies telling them that they don't fit, preventing it from just happening.

He knows that after that kiss in the woods, their time spent constantly together with small touches and kisses shared feels like something even though it's better if they give it another name. If they call it nothing. Because Sebastian doesn't enjoy commitment and Blaine doesn't want confrontation.

Especially now since he's patched things up with Kurt.

"Of course you think this is about you."

Blaine swallows, adjusts the satchel strap on his shoulder. The hallway starts to lose students, everyone slipping into their respective classrooms until it's just them.

He doesn't know what else this would be about. "You've been off. I'm just trying to be your friend."

"Which is a little different than being my mother, don't you think?" He snaps, setting off something cold in Blaine's stomach.

He hasn't told Sebastian yet, about Kurt, about how they've sort of patched things up and made everything whole again. Or at least he likes to think so. Likes to convince himself. He doesn't see this conversation getting any easier and maybe this isn't the right time but it sort of slips out of his mouth before he can stop it.

"I didn't break up with Kurt."

Sebastian stares at him for a long moment before shaking his head, looking towards the ceiling as a laugh crawls out of his throat. It sounds tired and strained. "You know, I never knew that the universe had a sense of humor."

He brushes past Blaine and he turns to watch him go, confusion weighing heavily in the honey part of his hazel eyes.

It takes Blaine a long time to realize that Sebastian wasn't talking about him and Kurt. Not really, anyways.

000

It's a week before he sees Sebastian again, which is saying something since he has one of the same classes with him. To be honest he doesn't really count that as seeing him because when he's in class, seated across from him, it's like he's not even there. He doesn't know which is more awful, not seeing Sebastian at all or Sebastian pretending he doesn't exist.

The worst part of it is that he misses him, even though he tries to pretend he doesn't.

Sebastian just…always seems to get him when he needs it. When he can't speak the words himself or say it outloud, the other just understands. Knows how he feels. And he listens to him in a way that matters. Not that Kurt doesn't pay attention, he does, but it's different. It feels different.

It is different.

Sebastian isn't Kurt, in all the right and wrong ways at the same time.

He misses the easiness of their relationship. Blaine doesn't have to try with Sebastian, because Sebastian already thinks he's perfect (Your ass isn't the only thing flawless about you, Anderson) and he realizes how much that means to him when it's gone. Blaine always feels like he has something to prove. To his parents. His teachers. His friends. Kurt.

Blaine doesn't understand where this sudden fight between them came from.

He has a hard time believing that this is about a few spur of the moment kisses shared between them. Sebastian doesn't seem like the type to hold grudges or have his feelings hurt simply because they won't talk about them. He's more confident than that; he has more pride than that.

Then what exactly is the problem?

He sighs, letting his palms spread out across the wood of one of the tables at the Dalton café, digging his nails into the surface like he might be able to leave an impression. Kurt barely has time for coffee, between running to the library and practicing solos for the Warblers.

Which he guesses he can understand, but it'd be nice to be able to look at someone across the table and have a conversation with them. It feels empty. He feels empty.

He glances up when he sees movement to his right, in line for coffee, and it's Sebastian. A warm sensation grips his ribcage, fills up his entire body and he doesn't feel empty anymore. He swallows over a lump in his throat that seemingly come out of nowhere and he finds his eyes gliding over the other's body like he's trying to remember what he looks like. Seeing him again is like a hard punch to the gut, air knocked right out of his lungs.

He suddenly wants to apologize even though he has no idea what to say sorry for but if it patches things up between them he's willing to do it. He makes a move to get up but Sebastian turns and greets someone to his left.

Another guy.

It's like a hand has wedged itself into his sternum, squeezing his ribs together until he swears he hears snapping noises. Sebastian smiles and leans down to whisper in the guy's ear, his hand traveling down his back as he speaks.

The other boy, who he now recognizes as Robert from one of his classes, blushes a dark crimson color that makes Blaine sick to his stomach. He doesn't recognize the sensation at first, because he's suddenly fucking angry that Sebastian is publically flirting with someone who's taken.

Everyone at Dalton has seen Robert's wrist, has seen the Clara Jones carefully carved into his skin. He doesn't shut up about her, how they met, how much they have in common, how much he loves her. And he knows that this car crash in front of him is a two way street but for some reason it just gets under his skin that Sebastian thinks he can just fool around with anyone because he doesn't belong to someone himself.

He briefly considers that it's something other than anger running through his veins, something emerald green as he stalks right up to Sebastian and yanks him by his arm out the door of the café and into the hallway but the colors mismatch in front of his eyes because all he can see is red.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Sebastian snaps, slapping Blaine's hand off his arm.

"What am I doing? What are you doing?" He asks, his voice rough and exasperated. "Why are you doing this to yourself? Do you want to get punched again, is that it?"

Sebastian shakes his head and straightens his back, like he's trying to make himself taller. All it does is make Blaine angrier, because he knows just from his posture that he's going to try and justify this situation.

"Robert and I were just talking."

"I bet you were just talking." Blaine laughs, the sound peaked and echoing against the high ceiling of the hallway a moment. "Everyone knows he has a girl's name on his wrist, what's wrong with you?"

Sebastian crosses his arms over his chest, smiles slowly. There's a cold ice to his eyes, a dead sort of look, like he's shutting himself down, keeping Blaine out. "Doesn't stop him from being curious."

"Stop it." Blaine snaps. He's had enough of this attitude, this 'it doesn't matter so why should I care' shell that's wrapped around the taller.

Because it does matter. Blaine cares, even though he knows he shouldn't. He can't help it, something keeps tugging him right back to this spot in front of Sebastian. Like gravity. Evitable. Even though the universe says otherwise, they shouldn't work yet somehow do.

"Why!" Sebastian exclaims, his arms snapping away from his body as he leans slightly towards him, making Blaine take a step back.

Something in the inflection of Sebastian's voice digs into his skin, makes him shudder. He keeps taking a few steps back until he bumps into the doorjamb of another room. It's an open common area but it's empty, devoid of students, either stuck in their own classes or outside where the weather has broken. It's cold but there's fresh snow.

And boys will be boys.

"What do you care who I decide to spend my time with." It's not a question and as Sebastian moves closer, their height difference causing Blaine to tilt his chin up to look at him.

Their eyes bore into one another, Blaine can feel the heat of Sebastian's body even through the layers of his Dalton uniform, it seeps through the fabric of his shirt and kisses his skin. He clears his throat, tries to keep his breathing in check because every intake of air all he can smell is Sebastian's cologne and body soap and skin—it's making him dizzy.

Sebastian brackets him against the wide doorjamb, hands on either sides of his neck, his eyes tracing the contours of his cheekbones and jawline. He should feel trapped like this, like a caged animal, itching to be free—but he doesn't.

He feels the opposite, he feels like this is the exact place he needs to be. He feels like he fits there, between his arms, like if he leaned in and molded against his chest he'd feel whole inside, complete in ways he didn't think he could be.

And suddenly, he understands what that means. It's a dawning sensation, settles over him like a wet blanket. His brain is still playing catch up with the rest of his body and organs.

"Tell me…" Sebastian whispers, Blaine's eyes fluttering closed as he feels his breath brush over his face. His heartbeat is in his ears, his throat, his fingers clenching at his sides so he doesn't do something stupid like touch Sebastian. "that seeing me with other people doesn't bother you."

There's a jerk reaction in his stomach that kicks into his chest, words scratching at his throat and voice box. "It doesn't bother me." But it doesn't sound convincing even to his own ears.

The taller smiles slowly and he brings a hand down to play with a curl near his ear, tucking it away, letting his fingers trail down the side of his face.

"I don't believe you."

Blaine doesn't know how long they stand there, practically pressed against one another like the walls are closing in. He can feel Sebastian's heartbeat against his own, the way his chest expands and contracts with every intake and exhale of air.

This time, it's Sebastian who kisses him.

It's hungry and greedy, like Blaine might slip away at any moment. Sebastian cups his face and draws him closer, sucks on his lower lip and his body betrays him because he can't help but moan at how good it feels.

He shudders and pushes Sebastian's body with his hands and he pulls back a moment, confused, like he's convinced Blaine is pushing him because he wants him to stop. But on the contrary, he just doesn't want to be pinned against a doorjamb anymore and gravity makes them stumble towards one of the couches.

They land haphazardly against the arm, Sebastian half sitting, half straddling it as he wraps his arms around Blaine's waist, pulls him between his legs. A groan and gasp mesh together and get stuck in the shorter's throat; he can feel their hardening cocks rub together in earnest and his fingers dig into Sebastian's shoulders as his tongue explores his mouth.

They shouldn't be doing this for a million different reasons; the place and timing is so wrong and as his hands skim through Sebastian's hair and trail down his shoulders, fingers tugging at the material on his forearms he suddenly can't stop thinking about Kurt and fuck, Kurt, he's cheating on Kurt.

A weight like a ton of bricks drops from a high height into the base of his stomach, almost makes him want to throw up. He's stunned with an incredible amount of guilt but at the same time overwhelmed with how much he doesn't feel bad.

"I—" He pants, Sebastian's mouth moving to kiss at his neck. "W-wait, I can't do this."

To his surprise Sebastian stops and doesn't try to encourage him any further; breathes heavy against his collarbone a moment before pulling back. His lips are red and wet from kissing and Blaine brings one of his hands up to run his thumb over his lower lip.

"I'm not sorry." Sebastian says, his voice surprisingly calm in wake of what they had been doing.

Blaine hums softly, glancing down to where his one hand is still grasping at the other's dress shirt and blazer on his forearm, pulling it up and away from his skin…

And there's something there.

A hint of letters even though Blaine can't make out what they are. Sebastian's skin is red and he pulls back from him and stands from the couch before Blaine can decipher out what the name says. He was pretty sure he saw the person's name began with an A. Was it a girl or a boy? Does Sebastian already know them? Why did it take so long for their name to appear on his wrist? How was that possible?

"I'm not sorry either." Blaine replies, rubs the back of his neck. Because he's not.

And even though Sebastian belongs to someone now (Alice? Arthur? Andrew? Allison?), even though that fact changes everything, it doesn't change how he feels. And maybe this was exactly what he needed to prompt his decision that he can't stay with Kurt a moment longer.

He knows what he has to do.

He has no idea why it takes him so long to realize that he's had everything so incredibly fucked up. No matter if Sebastian belongs to someone now or not, he can't stop himself from feeling the way he does. He doesn't belong with Kurt. Not yet, maybe not ever, regardless of what his own wrist says.

000

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the second part! :)