CHAPTER 2

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Author's Note: Thank you all for your reviews! Here is the second part:

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He thinks about her for the rest of the day. His mind is never far from her face, her body, her actions, her words… Her. He focuses on her so intently, he barely notices how much time has passed since she approached him in the hallway. But when his last surgery of the day comes to a close, he glances down to his watch, just out of curiosity. It's almost six.

She said to meet him in a half-hour.

He feels a smile spread over his face just at the idea, already heading to the doctor's longue. He changes quickly, switching out of his scrubs and back into his street clothes as if in a daze. He makes his way down a few blocks to Joe's in no time, his mind distracted all the while.

It's only when he sees her—looking up as the bell on the door announces his arrival—that he remembers her question from earlier in the day. His previous smile spreads into a wide grin when he realizes he has an answer to her query.

Have you ever longed for anything or… for anyone?

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"So…" Mark begins, straddling the bar stool next to hers and motioning Joe for a scotch. "What did you want to talk about?"

Lexie gives him a small smile. "Technically, I didn't want to talk about anything." She traces the drops of condensation on her bottle of beer, oblivious to his surprised stare. "But I figured we should talk about something." She looks over to him a moment later, holding his gaze with confidence. "And the truth is, Mark, you're all that I've thought about for the past three months." She pauses, but in his shock, he doesn't move to interject. "And before you think that I'm exaggerating," she adds, "just go and ask Dr. Jenson."

Mark narrows his eyes at her words, swirling his drink. "The shrink?" He asks in confusion, vaguely registering the name.

Lexie nods, taking a sip of her beer. "Yup."

"Why should I ask her?" Mark asks, tasting his drink as well.

"Because she's the person I've been talking to about it," Lexie replies. "For the last three months, she's been as deep inside my mind as you."

"She… What?" He leans forward, his forehead creasing in confusion, not having seen this coming at all. "You've been seeing the shrink? About… me?"

Lexie nods, suddenly feeling self-conscious and glancing down at the table. "Yeah," she replies. "I…" She trails off, lifting her head and her eyes to face him. "You heard what I said when I left this afternoon?"

Mark nods, feeling his stomach clench at the affirmation: she actually said it.

"Well, I…" A light blush covers her cheeks, and Mark finds himself smiling at the sight. "I meant what I said."
He grins, raising his eyebrows. "You yearn for me?"

Lexie chuckles, looking away to avoid his laughing eyes. "Well, it sounds ridiculously pathetic when you say it like that."

"It didn't sound ridiculously pathetic when you said it to me," Mark replies quietly.

Lexie turns her head to stare at him, holding her breath without a second thought as she clings to his words. "It didn't?"

He shakes his head. "No, it didn't." He stares at her for a second before getting to his feet. As he takes a step towards her, she scrambles to her feet as well. Sandwiched together between the two stools, Mark and Lexie aren't more than four inches apart. She stares up at him, taking a breath as his piercing blue eyes settle on her.

"And do you…" She swallows, suddenly nervous. "Do you have an answer to my question?"

A smile twitches onto Mark's lips, and he steps even closer. "Yeah," he murmurs, leaning towards her. "I do."

He watches her chest freeze in mid-inhalation as her breath becomes trapped somewhere between her lungs and her mouth. She stares at him without speaking as he repeats her words from earlier that day, modified only for her hearing.

I yearn for you too.

Neither is too surprised when she catapults herself forward a second later, her body and lips crashing against his with a show of force Mark can't remember her ever using with him before. He smiles to himself, opening his mouth to accept hers more fully just as her hands reach up, tugging on the lapels of his jacket to bring him as close as possible.

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If anyone had been watching the far counter at that particular moment when Lexie Grey had launched herself yet again into an old boyfriend's arms, they just would have simply rolled their eyes and chalked it up to her having too much to drink and him having no self-control. Anyone who didn't know the whole story, that is, anyone who didn't know the truth—would think that.

But Dr. Greta Jenson knew the truth. And she smiled from her post near the back of the bar, lingering just long enough to watch them break apart slowly, and then leave, hand-in-hand, through the side entrance to Joe's bar before heading home herself.

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Mark and Lexie break apart, breathless and exhilarated, but neither utters a word. Instead, he reaches down, finding her hand and taking it in his. She smiles when he steps away, pulling her along with him as they move through the crowded bar and out into the early night. Neither hesitates as they make their way to his car, though Lexie asks him multiple times if he's certain they're doing the right thing.

"Are you sure?" She questions again and again. "Are you positive? Because this isn't a one-night thing for me, okay? This—" She breaks off, gasping, as he spins her around, pressing her back against the hard, cool metal of his car's passenger side's door.

"You know," he murmurs softly, bending down so she can hear him as he takes a step closer, "if you keep trying to talk me out of this, I might start thinking that you're right to do so."

Lexie presses her lips together, reaching out to place her hands on his broad shoulders. She sighs quietly, holding him to her and closing her eyes while she speaks. "I just don't want this to be a one-night thing, okay?"

"So you said." He pauses. "Open your eyes."

She does so, staring up at him and bracing herself for whatever it is that he wants to divulge. "What?" She mutters when he doesn't speak. "Why did you want me to—"

"I asked you to open your eyes," Mark interrupts patiently, "because I want you to look into my eyes while I'm speaking, and know I'm telling the truth." He pauses, giving her a small smile when she doesn't turn her eyes away. "I wasn't lying when I said I yearned for you too. And you should know…" He shifts his weight, moving closer. "I didn't just mean I wanted to take you to bed." He lifts a hand, moving it to cup her cheek lightly. "I want to be with you, Lex, and I don't want it to be just one night, either. Not after everything that's happened." He smiles softly at her, and she smiles back, just before leaning forward to brush her lips against his. Though they'd both meant for the kiss to be brief and to immediately pull back, it's soon clear that that won't happen. It's a whole minute and a half later, when they break apart for much-needed air, that their lips finally part for the first time.

"I… want this to last," he manages to say, untangling their arms from around each other and forcing himself not to take things any further. "And it won't last if we stay here."

Lexie stares back at him for a second before a grin breaks out over her face. "Take me home, then," she whispers, pushing off from the car behind her and pressing herself against him. She smiles to herself, watching as he struggles not to give in to the temptation of their proximity and relative privacy. "Take me home," she repeats a second later, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek before stepping back, "and let's see how long this lasts."

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"Okay," he murmurs tiredly against her neck, placing soft kisses on her smooth skin, "I want to know now."

"You want to know what?" Lexie asks in a yawn, pressing her face more firmly against the soft pillows of his bed. She reaches a hand back, running it through his hair in appreciation.

"I want to know what you haven't been telling me. What else you yearn for. Besides the sex," Mark adds before she can say anything. "There has to be something else." A second later, he feels her hand grow slack and fall from its place against his neck. He can't quite tell, but he's sure she's turned a bit further away from him, too. "Lex?" He prompts, confused at her change in behavior. "What is it?"

"It's nothing," she mutters. "It's just—" She closes her eyes, breaking off and biting her lip. "The stuff I've been thinking about… It doesn't really need to concern you."

"But it already does," he replies. He reaches out, taking her chin in his fingers gently and turning her head to face him. "It already concerns me, doesn't it?"

Lexie stares at him, worry and fear filling her eyes. "It…" She bites down hard on her lip before speaking. "They're just dreams, okay? I—I can't control them."

"I know that," he replies softly.

Lexie closes her eyes, squeezing them shut for so long that if it weren't for the worried crease of her forehead, he'd be sure she was asleep. As the minutes drag by, though, he doesn't push her. He holds himself back, waiting for her to speak on her own. And, eventually, she does.

"Once… I dreamt we were married," she admits in a whisper.

It takes him a long minute to unstick his throat. His voice is slightly hoarse when he tries to speak. He forces himself not to jump to conclusions. "And what... What did you dream of, exactly? Were we at a tropical beach this time instead of in an on-call room?"

"No," she replies, surprising them both with a quiet laugh. "It wasn't like that."

He stares at her, feeling his heart almost leap out of his chest at the way her lips seem to curve involuntarily in a smile at whatever she's remembering.

"It was a few times, actually, but once we were... buying furniture. For our new house."

"Exciting," Mark notes dryly, unable to tease her yet still hanging onto her every word.

Lexie rolls her eyes, replying, "You've heard enough of the exciting ones for one night, I think."

Mark grins, remembering all the hours that had led to this moment, all the hours they'd spent wrapped in each other's arms, in each other's bodies… And how she'd told him all the ways she had imagined them being together, imagined them reaching this moment. She had grinned, blushed, laughed… And though she never hinted that there was anything more she'd dreamed of, he somehow knew there was. There had to be something more. He just never suspected it would be something like this. He never let himself hope.

It's her easy laughter that draws him out of his thoughts. "You picked out the ugliest chairs, Mark. I mean, really…" She chuckles. "They were awful."

"And did I get away with it?"

Lexie turns her head, quietly shocked to find that he's sporting an easy smile—same as her—despite his quiet tone. She's frozen for a second, not able to believe how calmly—how enjoyably—they're discussing this. "Y—Yeah," she whispers after a second, her voice much softer than she'd originally intended. She reaches out a hand, touching his cheek with her fingertips. "Yeah, you did."

He smiles. "Sounds like me," he notes, leaning into her hand. "Sounds like you, too…" He bends closer to her. "And it makes me wonder what else I can get away with," he murmurs, pressing his lips to hers gently. Lexie returns the kiss, but instead of deepening it, she lets it run its course and peter out. "What else?" He murmurs after their slow kiss deteriorates. "What else did you imagine?"

"I… I…" Lexie trails off, and Mark watches, confused, as she closes her eyes as turns away from him. Just as he's about to move forward and draw her back, to whisper comfort in her ear and assure her nothing's wrong through his soft touch, Lexie speaks. "I also dreamt we were trying for a baby," she forces herself to say. Her voice so hushed it's barely audible. "You and me," she adds, as if it were necessary to elaborate. She can almost hear Mark swallow beside her, but after a moment of reflection, she realizes that she doesn't regret telling him the truth, not matter how uncomfortable it might make things between them. She doesn't regret it, not anymore. Not when he deserves to know what sort of role he's been playing in her head all these months.

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"Hey, Lex?"

She looks over her shoulder, smiling at the sight of her husband leaning against their bedroom's doorframe. "Yeah?" She asks, pulling off her shirt and replacing it with one she can sleep in. "What's up?"
"Well, I was wondering…" She hears his sharp intake of breath, and frowns slightly at the sound, curious as to what he's worried about. "How's work been going?"

She almost laughs at the mundane question—and its serious buildup—but his solemn expression makes her hold back. "Work's been going great," she replies with an easy smile. "Why?"

"How would you…" He pushes off from the wall, walking a few steps to stand before her. He takes her hand, holding it lightly with his, and stares down into her eyes as he speaks. "How would you feel about taking a month or two off?"

Lexie can't help but laugh this time. "Now?" She questions with an amused smile. "Why? What do I need all this time off for?"

"It's not right now," Mark replies. "But… Would you be willing to take some time off sometime?"

Lexie smiles. "Sure, honey. Where do you want to go?"

He shakes his head, and steps closer a second later. "I don't want to go anywhere," he answers softly. "This isn't about a vacation."

Lexie tilts her head up at him, curious now. "Then what's it about?" She wonders.

Mark stares at her, licking his lips quickly. "It's about…" He glances down, reaching out for her other hand. He squeezes her fingers gently. "It's about a baby," he manages to say. "It's about…" He swallows. "Us having a baby."

Lexie stares at him in silence for a minute, trying to comprehend his words. "You…want a baby?" She manages finally.

"Yeah," he replies softly. "I do." He pauses, staring at her. "Do you?"

Lexie can't do anything but nod. From the way she moves her head, Mark knows she's answering him.

"R… Really?" He presses, not quite believing it.

"Y—Yes," she manages to reply. "Yes, I'd—" She breaks off, squeezing his hands in hers. "I'd really like that."

He leans forward, bending down to dip his lips to hers. He's grinning when he pulls back, and releases her hands to wrap his arms around her waist. "You'd 'like' it?" he teases. "That's it?"

She grins back, shoving against his chest lightly. His arms tighten around her in response. "You know what I mean."

"Yeah," he smiles, leaning forward to kiss her again. "I do know what you mean."

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"A… baby?" He repeats, trying to stay cool and not let his voice waver. "How'd it—How'd it turn out?"

"I don't know," Lexie murmurs, already slightly embarrassed for mentioning it. "It was just the one time."

"And why…" He trails off, confused as to why she'd fantasize about something she never seemed to want before. "Why'd it happen? Why'd you dream of that, of… of all things?"

Lexie closes her eyes momentarily, and the memory surfaces immediately. "It was the night you did that heart surgery with Teddy, on that little boy."

"You saw that?" Mark wonders aloud, not remembering having seen her in the gallery when he'd begun operating on the infant.

Lexie gives him a small smile when his eyes find hers. "Course I did," she replies quietly. From her quick response, he gets the impression that even though they might've been apart, she hasn't missed viewing any one of his surgeries. It makes him feel a bit better about having looked in on hers for the past few months.

Her quiet words draw him back to the present, but not to the unbridled happiness they'd had a moment later. "You kissed her when it was over." From the way she won't meet his eyes, Mark knows exactly whom they're talking about—and it isn't Teddy. "I… I was going to congratulate you—and Dr. Altman, of course—but…" She forces a smile, as if to say, Oh, well. "She beat me to it and got to you first."

Silence descends for a moment before Mark murmurs, "I would have preferred it to have been you."

Lexie laughs quietly, softly, as if his words had been a joke. "Right."

"It's true," he replies.

"Well, I just…" She pauses, sighing, and remembering his original question. Why'd you dream that? "I don't know," she whispers. "It's just… I saw you working so intently on that little boy, so focused on his safety, and I thought, just for a minute or two, what it would be like if we… If…" She shakes her head, abruptly breaking off. She turns away, avoiding his eye for a long moment. Eventually, she asks, "So why'd you two break up?"

Mark takes a deep breath, expelling it before he speaks. He tries to let go of her words as he starts to speak, but they linger in his mind. "She was making plans," he explains, "plans about the future, our… future, and I…" He shifts his eyes to hers. "I realized I didn't see a future with her. Not the way she did. Not really."

Lexie can't help but bite the inside of her lip in worry. "And… with me?" She wonders quietly.

His answer comes immediately. "I've always seen a future with you, Lex. Always."

Lexie takes a breath. "So why didn't you…" She closes her eyes, angry and confused all at once. She tries not to blame him for all this, but she knows that if he's not at fault, she must be. "Why didn't you come to me after you broke up with her? Why didn't you tell me that? Why didn't you—"

He gives her a sad smile, and it cuts off her protests. "How could I have done that, Lex? I'm always the one going around making us things that we're not, taking us too far when you're nowhere near ready. After…" He sighs. "After the past few years we've had, it's become clear to me that if things are ever going to work out between us, the both of us have to be equally ready for the same things. One of us can't be reaching. And with me always looking ahead…" He sighs again. "It just wouldn't have worked. You had to come to me on your own, show me that you wanted me—this—" He smiles, touching her cheek. "And today, you did. But this was weeks ago, after she and I broke up, and I had to hold myself back. I knew it wouldn't be good to rush into things with you right after I left her. You weren't ready and I… I couldn't ruin what might be my last chance with you by forcing those kinds of plans, those kinds of futures on you." He smiles. "So I've learned to wait, and we'll take it one step at a time now."

Lexie nods slowly, and from the faraway, glazed look in her eyes, he knows she's only half-here. He closes his eyes, hoping he hasn't said something wrong. Before he can open them, though, her words freeze him, blind, in place.

"They wouldn't have been forced."

Mark opens his eyes slowly a few seconds later, staring at her. He can barely breathe as he takes in the quiet, deliberate way she said those words. And the honesty that rings through them.

"Your plans… wouldn't have been forced," she repeats, not wanting to linger in silence. "Especially…" She takes a breath. "Especially not after all the time we've spent apart, away from each other… Alone. If you had told me what you wanted then… You wouldn't have been forcing anything, and even… Even now," she concludes in a whisper. "You wouldn't be forcing anything. Not on me."

Mark and Lexie stare at each other in silence for a few long minutes. It's so quiet in the apartment that they can hear the ding of the arriving elevator on the far end of the hall. Eventually, Mark closes his eyes, gathering what little reason seems to be left in his head to understand the whole picture.

"Why did you dream about us being married?" He wonders quietly, trying to fit all the pieces together. "If you wanted me so badly, why didn't you just imagine we were back together? Why marriage?"

Lexie swallows, not having expected this and therefore unsure of what to say. She'd expected something else, but he obviously… She shakes her head. "I—I don't know," she manages, trying to focus. "I—I did dream of just us together, but…" She closes her eyes, keeping them shut for so long a time that Mark can't help but prompt her.

"But?" He repeats, hoping she can't hear the desperation in his voice.

"But it was…" Lexie struggles to open her eyes and meet his. "It was always in the past. The dreams where we were just fooling around… They seemed, I don't know… dated. Like they'd happened years ago, when I was just starting my residency." She bites her lip, glancing down momentarily. "Like their time as reality had… come and gone." She pauses, listening to him heave a large breath beside her. "I don't know," she mutters again a moment later. "I guess…" She smiles weakly, glancing over to meet his eye. "I guess my mind kind of figured that while it was making up fantasies for itself, it might as well go the whole nine yards. And confuse the hell out of me along the way," she adds with a weak chuckle.

It's a long minute before Mark speaks. When he does, though, Lexie forgets how to breathe, how to think, how to be—she's completely focused on him, and what he's saying, and the very obvious meaning behind his words.

"They don't have to be a fantasies."

"Mark," she whispers when she can. His name comes out more like a whimper than an actual word, and she speaks more strongly the second time. "Mark, are you—"

"I'm not saying anything," he interrupts quietly. "I'm not asking you something, I'm not suggesting—" He breaks off, sighing in frustration and anger, certain he's already pushed her too far. "I'm just saying," he begins anew a moment later, "that your dreams…" He takes a breath, turning to look her fully in the eyes. "Your dreams don't have to stay dreams," he whispers. "You and me… Marriage… That doesn't have to be a fantasy, not if you don't want it to be. It doesn't have to be an unattainable dream, or something you yearn for but never get to have." He blinks at her, slowly, as she holds her breath. "It can be real, Lex, and I'd…" His serious face breaks out in a wide smile for a split-second, "I'd really love to make it real…" He sobers again, his expression turning quiet and somber. "But only if you want it, too."

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Author's Note: Cliffhanger, I know! I apologize, but the next chapter needs some more work and I didn't want to leave you guys with nothing :)

Please leave me a review below! I'll probably be able to update tomorrow :)